Iran Claims It Has Evidence bin Laden Died Of Illness "Long Ago"

Tyler Durden's picture

And so the battle of propaganda begins: on one hand we have the US government demanding the population take a leap of faith that Osama was killed then promptly converted into lead-containing fish food, now Iran has stepped up to the plate claiming it has 'evidence' that bin Laden was in fact dead long ago. From RIA: "Iranian Intelligence Minister Heidar Moslehi said Tehran has evidence
that al-Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden had died of disease long before the
United States' alleged raid on the terrorist, FARS Iranian news agency
said. "We have accurate information that bin Laden died of illness some time ago," Moslehi said."  And since Osama's body was promptly dumped at sea, and Obama decided to not release any pictures of the corpse, the conspiracy brigade will surely have a field day with this one. We can only hope Iran's evidence takes a shorter time to produce than WikiLeaks' Bank of America "killer" expose.

More from RIA:

Bin Laden's body was buried at sea less than 24 hours after the operation.

"If the US military and intelligence apparatus have really arrested or killed bin Laden, why don't they show him (his dead body) why have they thrown his corpse into the sea?" Moslehi continued.

A DNA test proved that the corpse of the dead man belonged to bin Laden, who has topped the FBI's most wanted list for the past decade.

White House spokesman, Jay Carney said on Wednesday that Washington would not release bin Laden's postmortem photos to avoid instigating propaganda and possible violence.

We can't wait for the imminent, soon to be conflicting, story from the White House refuting this allegation.

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FOC 1183's picture

Yes, unlike Joplin, Hendrix and Morrison (who were all buried at sea), Elvis is gainfully employed at the FRBNY wondering where his Bloomberg terminal is.

And since when does 'rut roh' get junked?

Gully Foyle's picture

Joplin, Hendrix and Morrison (who were all buried at sea)

What the fuck?

Grave Location:
Greenwood Memorial Park, Renton, Washington USA

Morrison is buried in the Père Lachaise Cemetery in Paris, one of the city's most visited tourist attractions. The grave had no official marker until French officials placed a shield over it, which was stolen in 1973. In 1981, Croatian sculptor Mladen Mikulin placed a bust of Morrison and the new gravestone with Morrison's name at the grave to commemorate the 10th anniversary of his death;[49] the bust was defaced through the years by cemetery vandals and later stolen in 1988.[50] In the 1990s Morrison's father, George Stephen Morrison, placed a flat stone on the grave. The stone bears the Greek inscription: ΚΑΤΑ ΤΟΝ ΔΑΙΜΟΝΑ ΕΑΥΤΟΥ, literally meaning "according to his own daemon" and usually interpreted as "true to his own spirit".[51][52][53] Mikulin later made two more Morrison portraits in bronze but is awaiting the license to place a new sculpture on the tomb. Morrison is also one of the well known members of the 27 Club.

Her ashes were scattered off the coast of California.



FOC 1183's picture

that's a lot of copy+paste for a reply to sarcasm.  great work

BigJim's picture

You're pretty stupid for someone who likes Bester.

Rick64's picture

Come on guys appreciate the humor.

Spirit Of Truth's picture

OBL's body was swiftly buried @ sea, corpse photos were not released, special op helmet cams were off during key part of raid, etc.  Seems a stretch that this all a ruse of some sort, but how believable was the birth certificate the prez released just before this PR coup-de-tat?

We may be at a climax of American mass delusion.

Gully Foyle's picture

Spirit Of Truth

You forgot the blown up stealth helicopter.



Spirit Of Truth's picture

Also see this 2-year-old American Spectator article, Osama bin Elvis:

j0nx's picture

Not like it matters anyway. The MSM will not ask the tough questions to those in charge and the American People will not demand that they ask them. The citizens that do demand that they be asked are quickly marginalized as Tea Party right wing nut jobs and then that's that. Rinse repeat. Future historians will have a field day with us assuming human beings have any part in the future.

The Alarmist's picture

Dead link? Too bad.

Did you get the part where the certificate was signed by a Hawaiian doctor named U.K.L. Lee (as in Ukulele)?


Spirit Of Truth's picture

I'll try again:

Yes....the U.K.L.Lee (ukulele) bit really seems almost as if Obama's "handlers" are just poking fun at those who are trying to expose the truth.

Citxmech's picture

The junking of the initial commenter is a community service - it lets you know how many trolls are onboard for today's thread.

Kopfjager's picture

"Rut roh" gets junked when people start taking statements of the Iranian government seriously.  Yea, I know you're skeptical of "departments of truth," but remember that the Iranians not only officially deny the holocaust but also deny the brutality they use against their own people in protests.  Take a step back and look at the pattern of which sources you consider to be telling the "truth."  

Here's a little example...  In Iraq we suspected Shiite insurgents were being aided and trained by Iranian intelligence but we weren't able to prove it.  At least, not until we found caches of weapons being transported across the border with Iranian serial numbers.  


Now check out how you immediately doubted what I just wrote.  I bet you thought something like, "our spooks could have planted them there on purpose."  You did didn't you.  Why?  Do you have reliable information that suggests otherwise or do you automatically assume that the US government is the only government capable of lying?  You guys crack me up really.  But keep cheering each other on, its fine--everyone knows the most you'll ever do about anything is write a comment.  Bunch of internet warriors aren't ya?  

Kopfjager's picture

Only one junk?  Looks like everyone went back to playing World of Warcraft already.  

Rick64's picture

I'm here. Would you like me to respond? I don't junk though.

 Edit: no response gotta go to the gym. How about some RATM :Killing in the Name (Corporations?)

baby_BLYTHE's picture

Great tune (politics aside)! Love when people post music

Millivanilli's picture
Anyone who trusts their government is a fool



Psywar - The real battlefield is your mind (1/8)

                                                                                                                                                                                                   Human Resources


Azannoth's picture

Last week Iran claimed that USA killed Bin Lading because they didn't want the secrets to get out, now it's he died years ago ? hmmmm so which is it ?

Mad Max's picture

Bin Lading?  Is that some combination of a bill of lading and warehouse receipts?

Hugh G Rection's picture

Don't worry


Obama will release a longform photoshopped Death Certificate in 2 years.... That will end the debate.

Problem Is's picture

"rut roh"

Hilarious! Who would <JUNK> that?
Obummer White House interns and Obummer Kool-Aid drinkers have nothing better to do?? Does that moronic, idiot twit Ding-by have a ZH account now??

Even More Hilarious
Iran's Ahmadinejad has more credibility than Obama Bin Lyin'...

Kopfjager's picture

Oh so the American government is the only one that puts out "kool-aid?"  And someone who disagrees should be removed from ZH?  Interesting...

Bringin It's picture

++ overbet - Great post!  What a bunch of morons ... or clever exposers.

Clear, easy to follow and hard, no impossible to refute. 

Mass delusion's gone parabolic.

Ivanovich's picture!


put them up there with "anonymous"?

taraxias's picture

"We have accurate information that bin Laden died of illness some time ago," 



No shit. 

Hexus's picture

Please take that back, that is a conspiracy theory. You have a psychological problem, belief in this conspiracy is comforting to you and represents a simplified world where we can't trust everything we see on the BBC. Besides, questioning the government is unpatriotic and questioning Obama is RACIST!

el Gallinazo's picture

Does Durden consider himself part of the "conspiracy brigade" in relationship to silver price manipulation?

Hexus's picture

No that's totally different, obviously.

JW n FL's picture
by el Gallinazo
on Mon, 05/09/2011 - 12:12


Does Durden consider himself part of the "conspiracy brigade" in relationship to silver price manipulation?



Durden, Myself, Several Other Here and of course those Federal Judges who have weighed the evidence and allowed Court preceding(s) to begin... all believe that JP Morgan.. with its 0.04% Leverage did in fact manipulate the markets for years and as of late has been granted and ALL Access Pass to continue with the new Vault and Margin Hikes!..


I wish that we could have 0.04% Leverage, an Approved Vault and Hikes WHENEVER we were on the wrong side of the trade like JP Morgan!



el Gallinazo's picture

Sorry. My mistake. I didn't get it. Your conspiracy theory is real but every else's is not.

cossack55's picture


wirtschaftswunder's picture



According to our sources on the Arab Street™, Mahmoud employed a number of spells and a secret-y cabal of sorcerers who enabled the diminutive jerk to assume office and maintain a near-hypnotic sway over other world leaders, such as U.S. President Barry Soetoro, Infidel Castro,  and thick-headed South American meat puppet Hugo Chavez of Venezuela.




SheepDog-One's picture

Yep, was reading about that too yesterday the Ayatolah arrested Ahmedinejads black magic 'Djin' who has been casting spells against the US and wants Ahmedinejad to resign.

i-dog's picture

The Ayatollayouso has been moving against I'minadinnerjacket for some time now. The Dinner Jacket is about to go and the conservative mullahs will be back in black. The Dinner Jacket is a globalist insider, anyway.

1100-TACTICAL-12's picture

Who is the mad junker? damn near every post is junked.

i-dog's picture

Don't stress. I like being junked ... it means someone actually read it! (though, in this case, it looks more like a CIA graffiti artist has sprayed the whole thread).

Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Cognitive Dissonance is a bitch to deal with. Better just to junk your worries away.

Strider52's picture

"The Ayatollayouso", "I'minadinnerjacket", "Osama Bill of Lading". Good laffs for a Monday!

Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Why can't Iran just shut up and go along with the cover story?

Quintus's picture

Indeed.  It's almost like they want to get bombed and invaded 'For humanitarian reasons'.

Innocent Bystander's picture

Thanks! that had me laughing for a few :)

Blotsky's picture

"For Humanitarian Reasons"

This is America's new "Peace Keeping" slogan. lmao.

chumbawamba's picture

I'm always compelled by, "It's for the children."

You could propose we invade a peaceful Inuit village, slay all the men, rape all the women and enslave the children and I would refuse.  But as soon as you mention, "It's for the children" (even though we're intending to enslave them), then by golly I'm on board!


I am Chumbawamba.

Tinfoil Hat's picture

What's this "enslave" you speak of?  we would liberate them and provide them jobs at Walmart and McDonalds and give them credit for new cars and big ass houses! 

blunderdog's picture

The real gift is the guaranteed college loans so they can learn useful job-enhancing skills.