Jones Day's Chrysler Charge To Taxpayers: $12,702,190.19

Tyler Durden's picture

Chrysler's little parade in bankruptcy court to make sure a few hundred thousand unionized workers retain their jobs for another year or two is finished. And here is the bill to you, dear taxpayer (or rather the first of many): Jones Day's invoice is in the mail. Everyone take out their wallets and please split the $12,702,190.19 equally. After all, now that we are all benefiting form having a much leaner, much more competitive Chrysler around, we should all be happy to pay each and every lawyer who made it possible.


Jones Day has been kind enough to provide taxpayers with a breakdown of expenses incurred while working day and night to crack this determined from day one case.


And to get an itemized bill, er, perspective on the thousands of hours worked on the Chrysler case by virtually each of Jones Day's day lawyers, don't be shy and click on the fee detail below: 434 pages worth of itemizations are sure to provide countless hours of entertainment.

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Bubby BankenStein's picture

A blended billing rate of $457 per hour!

lizzy36's picture

TD, any CIT update?  They going to file tomorrow?

Will Profit's picture

You didn't include the addendum invoice:  paper clips   $150,000.00

Anonymous's picture

Just imagine when we start billing the Gov't (taxpayers) for health care:
"Right there on Page 16 (of the 100+ page doc) is a provision making individual private medical insurance illegal."

Anonymous's picture

Goldman Sachs in Talks to Acquire Treasury Department

In what some on Wall Street are calling the biggest blockbuster deal
in the history of the financial sector, Goldman Sachs confirmed today
that it was in talks to acquire the U.S. Department of the Treasury.

According to Goldman spokesperson Jonathan Hestron, the merger
Goldman and the Treasury Department is “a good fit” because “they’re
in the business of printing money and so are we.”

The Goldman spokesman said that the merger would create efficiencies
for both entities: “We already have so many employees and so much
money flowing back and forth, this would just streamline things.”

Mr. Hestron said the only challenge facing Goldman in completing the
merger “is trying to figure out which parts of the Treasury Dept. we
don’t already own.”

Goldman recently celebrated record earnings by roasting a suckling
over a bonfire of hundred-dollar bills.

Elsewhere, conspiracy theorists celebrated the 40th anniversary of
NASA faking the moon landing.

And in South Carolina, Gov. Mark Sanford gave his wife a new diamond
ring, while his wife gave him an electronic ankle bracelet.

Amy Girl's picture

Hah, wait until the financial advisors bill shows up with its bonuses!


A Single Serving Friend

Will Profit's picture

Hey Anonymous,  Re your comment: "Goldman Sachs in Talks to Acquire Treasury Department" How about giving credit to "The Borowitz Report " when you reprint/steal, word for word, his blog posts. 


Anonymous's picture

A bargain at even twice the price!

Anonymous's picture

so many people out of work, there is no good news, the govt is just trying to create a positive feedback look with mkt manipulation!!!

Anonymous's picture


Will Profit's picture

Immelt, is that you?

Anonymous's picture

sir, i have instructed our employees to ignore all bad news and harp on any ounce of good news. fyi,Kernan is getting a bonus this year

tcopeland's picture

$1175 an hour for Mr. Plainer's time for "Business Restructuring & Reorg".  My goodness.

frankous's picture

TARP and stimulus cost tax payers 2 trillion so this is kinda peanuts, but still annoying

good afrticles...ttp://
Tell a politician about a problem and he or she will derive a way government can fix it. Tell a Wall Streeter about a problem and he or she will derive a way to profit from it.

Anonymous's picture

$135 for reading a document for 30mins. Nice work if you can get it.

Anonymous's picture

Now I'm no lawyer, but some of the "research charges" seem to be for items that most lawyers should know already

Lexis Charges for research regarding legislative history of bankruptcy code or research regarding section 101 of the bankruptcy code? Did they charge for their time in law school too?

Anonymous's picture

That's likely legitimate. They're not trying to find out what section 101 says; they're trying to find a case or a piece of legislative history that frames it in just the right way to support their point. There's no way to just know that offhand. You need to comb through the cases and the Congressional records to find it.