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JPM Goes Berserk With EOD Ramp

Tyler Durden's picture




Must be so profitable to have i) an infinite array of momentum chasing quant clients and ii) an overeager ETF trading desk consisting entirely of former Tetris world champions.

And after all, it makes all the sense in the world to lift consistently rising offers in a volumeless, newsless market.

And just in case you thought 4pm on Friday means Blue Label on the rocks time for HAL9000, you were wrong:




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Fri, 09/04/2009 - 16:09 | Link to Comment Bearish Spirits
Bearish Spirits's picture

As if prior action had not made this abundantly clear:

 

VOLUME DOESN'T MATTER ANYMORE!!!

 

They will game the market however they want.  Down move a couple days back on decent volume?  Push the market up on pathetic volume.  That way the smart traders stay away and the banks continue to make money.

 

Do a search on any stocks today which aren't complete junk.  In the vast majority of cases, volume was 20%-70% of the ALREADY low 30-Day average!  And the S&P powered through a 38.2% Fib on that AND bad news!

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 16:58 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 17:57 | Link to Comment VegasBD
VegasBD's picture

Thats ironic. Anonymous complaining about using "they" in a sentence...

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 20:29 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 23:12 | Link to Comment Ghettomedic
Ghettomedic's picture

I never got this either. There's the same stuff on a local politics blog I read. Some guy named "Deth Hacker" yelling at an anonymous poster for being "anonymous."Like you can find some fucker named "Deth Hacker" in the yellow pages.

Sun, 09/06/2009 - 23:01 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 18:02 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 19:42 | Link to Comment Bearish Spirits
Bearish Spirits's picture

For you and other anonymous spammers, it's nice to know that all of you are psychics and can see that anyone who realized what exactly is going on here has lost money during this rally.

 

In spite of what you may think, there are people who can make some money through limited participation and who can acknowledge that they're still playing a rigged game.  I'm sure the indices moving in lockstep in relation to each other every day is an organic market event, right?

Junk.

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 22:15 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 22:18 | Link to Comment They steal from...
They steal from us everyday's picture

If you anonymous doubchebags are not capable of seeing what HFT does is dead wrong than that is your problem.  And the problem of every innocent investor left holding the bag when HFT machines run up stock valuations to stupid levels based on nothing more than cheating and front running on low volume days.

It is criminal what is happening.

And yeah I can trade it, so what?  I could trade a fairly valued market AND keep positions overnight but not in this market.

Sat, 09/05/2009 - 13:40 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 18:21 | Link to Comment Marshal Ney
Marshal Ney's picture

Nag,nag,nag.

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 18:47 | Link to Comment ZerOhead
ZerOhead's picture

If it wasn't "them" then it must have been ... "US?" 

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 21:27 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 16:08 | Link to Comment nightfly
nightfly's picture

Exactly, fleece the stupid and the chasers. Is it still a game when it's rigged?

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 16:12 | Link to Comment lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

Gordon gecko 2.0 (on cnbc right know) just told me that the labor market is doing "exactly what it should when the economy moves from recession to recovery". He also told me to look for 4% GDP growth over the next 6 quarters.

Based on GG 2.0 those tetris champions are just trading on fundamentals and thus are fricking genius's

 

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 16:21 | Link to Comment 3greenlights
3greenlights's picture

LOL, good one lizzy. And low and behold, Dow Jones, taking it's Rupert cue, sends this across the wires for all the boomers who : "Can't ride a two wheeller no mo' due to that inner ear problem caused by that See-al-liss med, that's why me and the wife got us a tri-Harley"

 NEW YORK (Dow Jones)--The price/earnings ratio of the Standard & Poor's 500 Index at the close of trading Friday was 15.52.

  On Wednesday, the ratio ended at 15.19.

  The price/earnings ratio for the S&P 500 measures the index's closing level divided by the index's total adjusted earnings for the most recent year.

  In 2008, the most recently reported year, S&P 500 companies reported earnings of $65.47 a share.

 

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 21:25 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 22:29 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Sat, 09/05/2009 - 06:48 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 16:15 | Link to Comment deadhead
deadhead's picture

i just hope when (not if) this thing crashes and the average joe loses his 401k and ira money again, he and she realize that it was the government, fed, and the big banks that took them for a ride.....again.

 

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 16:20 | Link to Comment Bearish Spirits
Bearish Spirits's picture

Exactly.  They've been building the case in the media over the last six months that "buy and hold" is the thing to do.  After all, if the market keeps going up, it's the only sensible course of action!

 

There are going to be a lot of broken people when the market finally tanks.  And we'll all know who's responsible when it does.

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 18:05 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 19:53 | Link to Comment Bearish Spirits
Bearish Spirits's picture

You're right. 

Some of us are expecting another big drop soon.  Perhaps we're wrong in our prognostication.  However, if there is one in the next year or two, having two big drops since last September would have definitely beat the odds of 3/40.  That would reek of the market being pumped and dumped like a cheap penny stock.

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 22:25 | Link to Comment They steal from...
They steal from us everyday's picture

No you anonymous ignoramus it is not magic.  You simply wait for the bottom to arrive in the middle of next year and then buy.

What fucking 'drop like this' are you talking about?

The market is up 50% from being overvalued in March.

This is a rally not a drop.

See you next year at the bottom.  I suppose you are invested fully now or just a fucking hypocrite.  Enjoy the plunge.  You earned it.

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 23:16 | Link to Comment Ghettomedic
Ghettomedic's picture

That post touched a nerve, eh. Bottom picking is a fools game. The parent poster is correct. I think you need to start looking past YTD charts. It's not a rally when you're still down from the 2007 peak. You're more likely to be wrong than right trying to pick the bottom since markets have more up days than down.

The odds of actually beating market returns are so remote it's not worth it to try. You can do what I did today. Buy. Up day? Buy. Down day? Buy. Next year? Buy. It's pretty simple. Every two weeks, I buy.

Allocation is more important than timing.

 

Sat, 09/05/2009 - 00:28 | Link to Comment defender
defender's picture

Sadly, the last three of you all missed the point.  The money that was lost by the boomers can't be replaced.  This is what they have been saving for the last 30 years, trying to get some security for their autum years.  They have no ability to buy more stocks because they have just had their home equity wiped out, their stock portfolio wiped out, and their continued employment either cut or called into question.  And allocation?  Well, most of them had just 3 choices in their 401K-- high risk, medium risk, and low risk. 

The harsh reality is that these people got screwed.  What they were told was a sure thing year after year ended up being nothing, and now they must face their new reality.

Sat, 09/05/2009 - 10:45 | Link to Comment deadhead
deadhead's picture

good point defender, sad to say.

Sat, 09/05/2009 - 14:01 | Link to Comment MinnesotaNice
MinnesotaNice's picture

It is very sad... because their transition from having 'everything' to living a frugal retirement lifestyle will be very difficult.

Sat, 09/05/2009 - 14:02 | Link to Comment Ghettomedic
Ghettomedic's picture

Nobody told them it was a sure thing. At some point, the issue of personal responsiblity needs to come into play. There are no sure things. People act like these investors have only a 401k. There's a universe of options out there that go beyond the 401k. Your home, your taxable accounts, your bank account, IRAs, Roth, cash in a shoebox, etc...

I keep hearing "those poor baby boomers!" Woe is them! Never mind their parents lived through the great depression, WWII, the early 1970s, early 1980s. It's not like this was some one in a trillion thing. They got greedy and stupid. They took out stupid loans on shit they couldn't afford based on the foundation of sand called their home equity.

Someone put ink on those loans and it was done by choice. Expensive way to learn a lesson. Oh well. That's life.

Sun, 09/06/2009 - 18:55 | Link to Comment long-shorty
long-shorty's picture

Let's show a little more respect to 59335; it's not everyday that the chief market strategist for Edward Jones posts on ZH.

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 16:23 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 16:40 | Link to Comment NRGTDR
NRGTDR's picture

That's when you will see the pitchforks hit the streets..... and Kudlow his ilk will seek a new identity in the newly formed Federal Financial Fraud Protection Program

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 17:11 | Link to Comment dnarby
dnarby's picture

Fuck J6P...

I hope the rank and file COPS and the MILITARY realize it.

Might not be a bad time to buy Xe stock before it takes a moonshot.

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 16:16 | Link to Comment TumblingDice
TumblingDice's picture

That's one hot potato.

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 16:27 | Link to Comment deadhead
deadhead's picture

"And just in case you thought 4pm on Friday means Blue Label on the rocks time for HAL9000, you were wrong:"

Absolutely poetic, TD.  Or should I say "bidetesque"?

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 16:39 | Link to Comment RobotTrader
RobotTrader's picture

Just like the good old days.....

Goldman Prop Desk captains are going to be partying huge in the Hamptons this weekend.

While the wife begs for attention...

 

They will be at the beach, trolling for younger and hotter items....

 

Especially those willing to chug vodka straight out of the bottle, who will do anything and everything to hook up with a man who has "billions under management".... and just scored a quick million by powerjamming ES futures in the span of 3 hours..

 

 

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 16:53 | Link to Comment Bankster T Cubed
Bankster T Cubed's picture

heroic!

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 19:03 | Link to Comment Marshal Ney
Marshal Ney's picture

This vodka tastes fishy.

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 19:33 | Link to Comment deadhead
deadhead's picture

excellent Marshal!

reminds me of the story of Adam and Eve.  As they were walking through the Garden of Eden, Eve spotted a beautiful, rippling stream and was overcome with the desire to go swimming for the very first time.  Sprinting towards the stream, Eve dove into the waters as Adam screamed out "Eve, don't do that. Don't go in the water!!".  Of course, it was too late as Eve splashed into the stream.

Adam mumbled to himself, "now we will never get that smell out of the water."

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 20:28 | Link to Comment Marshal Ney
Marshal Ney's picture

I saw this on a bathroom wall, my first week in college: "If girls are made of sugar and spice, and everything nice, why do they taste like tuna fish?" Hey, come on, it's Friday.

Sat, 09/05/2009 - 03:51 | Link to Comment Spartacus
Spartacus's picture

Well, I like this post. to be honest, it is better to taste fish most of the time in these trying times. Kepps you fresh and charged.:)

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 16:59 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 17:40 | Link to Comment deadhead
deadhead's picture

it's a robo ukrainian thing.

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 17:14 | Link to Comment LoneStarHog
LoneStarHog's picture

How does one post a chart/image?  I can't seem to find any info and the various HTMLs don't work.

Anyone?

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 17:17 | Link to Comment deadhead
deadhead's picture

must be an approved contributor as I understand.

you can submit articles to zh if you want to be a contributor.

 

 

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 17:15 | Link to Comment deadhead
deadhead's picture

Outstanding Robo!!!!  Love the neglected wife to hottie segue.....you're the best!

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 17:15 | Link to Comment molecool
molecool's picture

Dude, you have to get your ass laid - it's getting out of hand.

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 17:55 | Link to Comment Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

well, the last picture just crashed my conjecture about slutty blond chicks; and it was my Fermats theorem when it comes to chicks :{

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 18:50 | Link to Comment Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

THANK YOU ANDY; yes SHE is THE perfect woman

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 18:55 | Link to Comment Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

yep; that's her. 

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 19:03 | Link to Comment Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

she's the new Sharon Stone IMHO; not that there is anything wrong with the original Sharon Stone ( Sharon if you're reading this; send me a PM :D )

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 18:50 | Link to Comment deadhead
deadhead's picture

good stuff andy, but no red hair and freckles.....

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 20:18 | Link to Comment artman1933
artman1933's picture

WHOA! That looks like lead paint!!

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 18:30 | Link to Comment zeta
zeta's picture

Inside the brain of Robot Trader:
http://www.nounaimaker.com/img/Robot+Trader.gif

'H' is Japanese for 'eros'.

Robo loves blondes.

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 18:45 | Link to Comment Marshal Ney
Marshal Ney's picture

What's that strange white powder all over her left arm?

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 18:48 | Link to Comment Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

blow

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 18:55 | Link to Comment deadhead
deadhead's picture

cheeky...you kill me!  I always look forward to your thoughts (though the advanced math stuff is beyond me....got a "b" in calculus in college in the mid 70s but never understood a thing!).

please keep the hits coming. thanks

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 19:01 | Link to Comment Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

wow! thanks man; when the opportunity arises for me to say something meaningful and worthwhile; i will, surely, do so. math is beautiful; as long as it is not without meaning or a " background ". Oh; one more thought; the problem with people and mathematics seems to be in the vast number of symbols and notations; but not with the field itself. Most people understand quite well what the equation, or a proof says if presented to them without to many symbols ( not simplified; just written i a different manner )

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 20:27 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 22:08 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 16:54 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 17:48 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 18:19 | Link to Comment Sqworl
Sqworl's picture

I think the conversation went more like this:

Ok Comrads, burn it and churn it, I want to make sure the peasants have nothing left.

Tzarist Russia...

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 23:55 | Link to Comment Bankster T Cubed
Bankster T Cubed's picture

bingo

Sat, 09/05/2009 - 00:52 | Link to Comment defender
defender's picture

Later on, the press release for the meeting read "in Communist America stock market trades you!"

Apologies for the slashdot meme.

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 17:18 | Link to Comment cocoablini
cocoablini's picture

JPM, on Tuesday, had high volume on it's own stock. And guess what that volume is-it's sells. JP was probably given a share# order and just pulled the gunner on the SPYS. And since everyone bailed, there was no counter force against the mindless buying pacman. Volume was really, really low for the long weekend-and that's when the FED and Geithner can help the indices crank up and recover. They were also fighting Tues and Wed-and the result was quite different with real human beings pulling the slots. Also, this may have been lure to have the shorts run in on Tuesday, at which point they get squeezed on the assumed low volume day. Guess who covers the short stocks-the people that own the shares(USG,right?)

A small investment in gunning the SPYS over the technical hurdle can force the shorts to cover and the seller(USG) makes their investment back in spades. I mean really, real unemployment at 16.5 % and USG number at9.7% and we get a 100 pointer?

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 17:46 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 20:36 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 21:38 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 17:36 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 23:44 | Link to Comment PenGun
PenGun's picture

 Brother.

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 17:37 | Link to Comment shortsail03@yahoo.com (not verified)
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 18:26 | Link to Comment Rama V
Rama V's picture

Where would I find a file with representative trades from JPM including time, price and volume over the course of a few days in order to analyze the dollars they spend (there is no price given in the screen above).  Could the dollar sum of their trades be zero over a realtively small period of time such as one and a half days?  Does JPM make many small trades at rising prices and then some big trades on a down tick, but overall profitable or dead even.  They would still make a profit from being a liquiity provider.  If they just traded with themselves, that would eliminate some of the need for capital.

Fri, 09/04/2009 - 20:27 | Link to Comment BM (not verified)
Fri, 09/04/2009 - 20:30 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Sat, 09/05/2009 - 18:01 | Link to Comment greenbacks (not verified)
Sat, 09/05/2009 - 01:35 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Sat, 09/05/2009 - 14:02 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Sat, 09/05/2009 - 18:02 | Link to Comment greenbacks (not verified)
Sun, 09/06/2009 - 11:50 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Sat, 09/05/2009 - 17:21 | Link to Comment omi
omi's picture

Momentum chasing works both ways. I don't see what you're complaining about. If you want stocks to fall just wait a little, and I'm sure they'll be shorting them to the downside in harmony with retail clients bailing out of their stocks.

 

The last week should be called the rise and fall of the VIX.

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