JPM Reports Perfect Trading Quarter, Makes $112 Million In Average Daily Trading Revenue

Tyler Durden's picture

Following yesterday's news that Bank of America's D-grade traders eked out a perfect trading quarter in Q1, it would be a massive embarrassment to anyone who did not follow suit and also report of quarter of trading perfection. No such worries for JP Morgan, which just reported that it lost money on exactly zero days in Q1, averaged $112 million in daily trading revenue and had 7 days in which the firm had trading profits of "more" than $160 million, including 2 days unbounded by an upper limit range. Next, we expect Goldman and Citi to do the same. It is a good thing markets are not zero sum, or else someone may ask just who (or rather which taxpayer) is the loser to all these "trading perfection" days...

From JPM's just released 10Q:

And for those curious what "efficient" central planning looks like here is the list of total trading loss days by year for JPM:

  • 2008: 97
  • 2009: 42
  • 2010: 8
  • YTD 2011: 0

In other news, this is perfectly normal


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Hephasteus's picture

Bernie Madoff would be jealous of their trading record. Haha.

Xibalba's picture

Madoff was a chase 'customer'

GetZeeGold's picture



Wow....I'm ucking shocked.




Thomas's picture

Fourth Turning on its way.

Bartanist's picture

What excellent control of the markets and coordination by the banks.

Remember the days when the banks were not so well coordinated and they actually competed against each other... commissar?


At $112 million /day one would think they would be able to clean up their balance sheets in no time.

But then what is their incentive to clean up their balance sheets, there would be people clammering for a free market system and that would endanger profits. Best to just hand the money out as bonuses and keep the balance sheets weak so that the leeching of America's balance sheet can continue unimpeded.

mogul rider's picture

The perfect setup of the silver 10 ounce fish elmer fudds was a thing of beauty.

oogs66's picture

QE2 makes it a lot easier to trade treasuries

newworldorder's picture

Obama must be so pround of his "fat cat" buddies. Jamie is another "Chicago boy does good" in NYC.

Sandy15's picture

When the Fed tells you in advance, it's easy.

If The Bernack would just put out a daily news flash, we all would have perfect trading quarters!!

Thomas's picture

Don't need to know anything. You only need to front run trades. I wouldn't be surprised if more than one bank inserted itself between the buyer and seller now.

equity_momo's picture

And taxpayers continue their 100% losing streak for the last quarter.   Zero-sum.  112 mil EVERY DAY thanks to us schmucks. Just 1 bank..

DeadFred's picture

One needs to look at it from the right perspective.  112 million a day is just a tax to the ones who run the government (the banks). Rulers have always reserved the right to tax their subjects, plus this is a voluntary tax.  If you don't own stocks or bonds, have a retirement account or don't partake in any of the other economic endeavors affected by the market, then you don't have to pay the tax.  Thank goodness for the benevolent banks.

101 years and counting's picture

makes you wonder if they knew ahead of time about the Japanese earthquake, tsunami and nuclear meltdown.


101 years and counting's picture

$7 billion in revenues.....and profits.  what did JPM "earn" in Q1?  about 3 or 4 billion?  so, core "banking" netted a loss of 3-4 billion.....

no wonder glass steagall will never be reinstituted.

LawsofPhysics's picture

Yep, and why WW3 is already in the works.

Jim in MN's picture

Lest we forget the nooklyar thing at Fukooshma, a quick scan this morning:

TEPCO forced to increase water pumping into both Units 1 and 3 after temperatures rise in cores;

Humans enter reactor building (#1) for first time since disaster;

IAEA says radioactive ocean water from Japan will reach US West Coast in one to two years;

Radioactive cars shipped from Yokohama to Santa Barbara;

PM Kan orders closure of more reactor units in central Japan due to earthquake fears.

So that's all under control then.

FunkyMonkeyBoy's picture

When government and corporations work hand in hand for their own agenda at the detrement to the people, it is called:


The U.S. is a 100% fascist country.

NumberNone's picture

In Iran they would be charged with sorcery for this sort of bullshit.

LawsofPhysics's picture

I'll keep saying it until WW3 is over.  The financial sector (which adds no real value) of our economy is a cancer that the broader sectors of the economy can no longer sustain.

Proprietary trading steals real value from the system and needs to be shut down.  Crash the system, crash it now.  The sooner we do, the sooner compensation will find its way back to people that are actually worth a shit.

John McCloy's picture

This also means that when the market is heading down it is because they make it so and are all on the other side. What I really want to how they communicate with one another and coordinate their efforts.

LawsofPhysics's picture

Don't kid yourself, these executives run in the same circles.  My brother-in-law runs a big venture capital group.  I sense that even the rich are beginning to turn on each other.  He told me that he wanted to buy my wife and I a great big (several million dollar) house with property (even though I already own 80 acres of arable land).  I have one mortgage left on some rental properties and about five years left on the mortgage on the house I built (which is under $1,000 per month) in exchange he wanted me to sell my house, some of my land and pay him my mortgage payment indefinitely.  When I told him this sounded a lot like "rent" and when I pressed him on who would own the equity in the house he got really pissed.

I have two degrees in engineering and biochemistry and this was coming from a very wealthy guy who got his business degrees from Stanford and Harvard.  Fuck him and my wife (yes this has caused some tension) if they don't "get" it, I am not stupid.  My grandfather, father, and I have all served. I have seen enough in my life to understand what liberty and freedom really is.  Americans will too once these assholes turn us into another third world country.

benburnyanki's picture

Hell yea Matey Way To Go on the Banksta Bro-In-Law.

No worries about the wife either, either she is for you or for her pocket book and her blood relatives pocketbooks. Can't be both so if she is pissed at you and plays he brother's 'game' trying to mind fuck you out of big money tell her to shut up and keep sucking and not to talk with her mouth full.

Seriously, dude, she is typical USA bimbo trying to get your house notes in her Bro's name right before she divorces you. USA betties are all really just prostitutes and have zero hedge respect for men as they can always go over to a gay girlfriends house and get free blowjobs.

samsara's picture


"This also means that when the market is heading down it is because they make it so and are all on the other side. "


I predict that when it Does go Down,  It will be all their Programs working in concert and it won't be a 'Flash" crash in one stock or market.   It will be a wall to wall,  system wide flash crash that will be the equivelient to the Shock and Awe warfare.    All Algo programs working together networked.

As to your other question.

"What I really want to(sic know is)  how they communicate with one another and coordinate their efforts"

They each talk to each other every day.  

Read this post from another ZH thread.  Here's a Peek to who "They" are.  And how they communicate.

Read and Grokk in Fullness what the below means.


samsara's picture

Who 'They" are (in part).


by zaknick
on Thu, 04/28/2011 - 17:50  #1218076


The Four Horsemen have interlocking directorates with the international mega-banks.  


Exxon Mobil shares board members with JP Morgan Chase, Citigroup, Deutsche Bank, Royal Bank of Canada and Prudential.  


Chevron Texaco has interlocks with Bank of America and JP Morgan Chase.  BP Amoco shares directors with JP Morgan Chase.  RD/Shell has ties with Citigroup, JP Morgan Chase, N. M. Rothschild & Sons and Bank of England.


Former Citibank chairman Walter Shipley sat on Exxon Mobil’s board, as did Wayne Calloway of Citigroup and Allen Murray of JP Morgan Chase.  Willard Butcher of Chase sat on the board of Chevron Texaco.  Former Fed chairman Alan Greenspan came from Morgan Guaranty Trust and served on the board of Mobil.  BP Amoco director Lewis Preston went on to become president of the World Bank. 


Other BP Amoco directors have included Sir Eric Drake, the #2 man at the world’s largest port operator P&O Nedlloyd and a director at Hudson Bay Company and Kleinwort Benson.


 William Johnston Keswick, whose family controls Hong Kong powerhouse Jardine Matheson, also sat on the board of BP Amoco.  Keswick’s son is a director at HSBC.  The Hong Kong connection is even stronger at Royal Dutch/Shell.

Lord Armstrong of Ilminster sat on the boards of Royal Dutch/Shell, N. M. Rothschild & Sons, Rio Tinto and Inchcape.  Cathay Pacific Airlines owner and HSBC insider Sir John Swire was a director at Shell, as was Sir Peter Orr, who joins Armstrong on Inchape’s board.  Shell director Sir Peter Baxendell joins Armstrong on the board of Rio Tinto, while Shell’s Sir Robert Clark sits on the board of the Bank of England.


As a result of the deregulation craze in the US companies no longer have to report their top shareholders to the SEC.


 According to 1993 10K reports filed by the Four Horsemen, the Rothschild, Rockefeller and Warburg banking combines still control Big Oil.  The Rockefellers exert control through New York mega-banks and Banker’s Trust, which in 1999 was purchased by Warburg-controlled Deutsche Bank in its bid to become the largest bank in the world. 


As of 1993 Banker’s Trust was #1 shareholder in Exxon.  Chemical Bank was #4 and J.P. Morgan was #5.  Both are now part of JP Morgan Chase.  Banker’s Trust was also leading shareholder at Mobil.  BP listed Morgan Guaranty as its biggest owner in 1993, while Amoco listed Banker’s Trust as its #2 shareholder.  Chevron listed Banker’s Trust as its #5 shareholder, while Texaco listed J.P. Morgan as its #4 owner and Banker’s Trust as #9. 


Thus, Deutsche Bank and JP Morgan Chase – the banks of Warburg and Rockefeller – have increased shares in Exxon Mobil, BP Amoco and Chevron Texaco.  Rothschild-controlled Bank of America and Wells Fargo exert West Coast control over Big Oil, while Mellon Bank also remains a big player.


 Wells Fargo and Mellon Bank were both top 10 shareholders of Exxon Mobil, Chevron Texaco and BP Amoco as of 1993.


Information on Royal Dutch/Shell is even harder to obtain since they are registered in the UK and Hollandand are not required to file 10K reports.  It is 60% owned by Royal Dutch Petroleum of Holland and 40% owned by Shell Trading & Transport of the UK.  The company has only 14,000 stockholders and few directors.  The consensus from researchers is that Royal Dutch/Shell is still controlled by the Rothschild, Oppenheimer, Nobel and Samuel families along with the British House of Windsor and the Dutch House of Orange. 


Queen Beatrix of the Dutch House of Orangeand Lord Victor Rothschild are the two largest shareholders.  Queen Beatix’ mother Juliana was once the richest woman in the world and a patroness of the right-wing occult movement.  Prince Bernhard, who married Juliana in 1937, was a member of the Hitler Youth Movement, the Nazi SS and an employee of Nazi combine I.G. Farben.  He sits on the boards of over 300 European companies and founded the Bilderbergers.


When you’re being robbed, it’s always a good idea to be able to identify the perp.  Now if only we could get the cops to bring em’ in…


LawsofPhysics's picture

Thanks for the post.  Yes, they run in the same circles, serve on each others boards etc.

Ident 7777 economy's picture

Who 'They" are (in part).

- - - - - -  - - - -  - - - -  - - - -  - - - -  - - - -  - - - -

Too fantastic too believe?

Some might say so ...

Jim in MN's picture

Don't see the Koch Industries perps listed.  Why?

Ident 7777 economy's picture

You think they ought to be listed (maybe I missed the /sarc tag) ...

Maybe it would be easier to list those who should NOT be listed ...

Seasmoke's picture

you would think they would throw in a few losing days each month, just so it wouldnt look so obvious

topcallingtroll's picture

I think it is obvious.

The FBI cant be bothered to investigate big stuff, but when that programmer from goldman sachs made a copy of their HFT algorithym that goldman admitted could be " used to manipulate markets" the FBI and interpol were in germany in less than 24 hours.

Since when has making illegal copies of computer applications been so important to the fbi?

The buyers and sellers are being gouged by frontrunning.

nathan1234's picture

It's obvious that the only markets that can work are the spot markets. And maybe barter is the best. So one does not get worthless dollars or other currencies.

We dont need the banksters at all and their servants in the Givernemnts who do their bidding.

dryam's picture

Change you can believe in, bitch.

cirrus's picture

I guess those tens of millions of ounces short silver didn't hurt then this quarter. After all, silver was only up like 80% or something at one point.

fwiw imho's picture

Well, why not simply turn over the Treasury to JPM?

The deficit would be wiped out in no time.

samsara's picture

"Well, why not simply turn over the Treasury to JPM?"

That would be just a formality.   They OWN the Fed literally.  Who do you think set up the Fed in the first place Mr. Jekyll?

The Treasury and the Fed are just the public PR firms for David Rockefeller(ie JPM) and Rothchilds.


benburnyanki's picture

Fwit nitwit:

"Let JPM run the Fed. The deficit would be wiped out in no time."

Samasara is the man fool. JPM=Fed=G$ and do not forget this equation Einstein.

So the reason the Fed and Gov "Looses Money" hand over fist and needs to perpetually raise our taxes is cause the game is FUKIN RIGGED Einstein as Money=Debt. If Money=Gold we would not be in this mess.

JPM invented the fukin Money=Debt on Jykyl Island in 1913 to fuk the taxpayer and invent the FEd and IRS.

You a foolish sheep and should pull the CIA/CNN mind fucking dick out your brain and read Comittee of 300 at


Kina's picture

Not hard to win when you can see everybody elses cards in the mirror.


But the perfect score just shows how arrogant they now are, knowing that no power will touch them, but rather help them.

AldoHux_IV's picture

It's like saying the kid who get's to make up the rules at his own game won everytime.

benburnyanki's picture

Like grade school where the biggest bully gang ran the dodge ball games and made the rules as you played.

Similar to US gov. in about all they tell us. Look at this week alone with Oslama and FUkzishimi and Quake Drills next to Bombing Levees? Fuk me dead that is weird shit matey.

Actually it looks like the Gang Banger Banksta's are directly connected to the Israeli Mob and Israeli Gov according to the book Red Mafiya which would explain the cash and gold missing in 911 being relocated to Israel and the Mossad connection to blowin the 3 towers on 911.

See real facts here and Big Wig Pres wanabe Trump in the gang too:

Just the facts mam:

buzzsaw99's picture

Welfare Queens of the Universe.

Jim B's picture

Good to see the casino operators are doing fine... Until the next crash.  Long Live TBTF!

Commander Cody's picture

Inbred, insider-trading mody fos!  Can't lose when you control the house.

swissinv's picture


mogul rider's picture

But to do without you selling is admirable.

AgShaman's picture

Haha....the "Benny's" of having 'Devil's Insight'....and of course, your own private window at the FED 

mogul rider's picture

Well actually they made about 20 fucking trillion in the last week averaged out gives the number.


Man the silver slaughter was truly breathtaking and truly something to admire. Yeah they are fucking evil, but, boy you gotta admire their skills and man can they fuck up your day

mogul rider's picture

Admire and respect your enemy that is how you beat them.

meizu's picture

they can make a killing dumping thanks to pumpers like zerohedge

bbaez's picture

I wanna be a trader?

Where do I start?

What books can I read or is there a training program?