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JPMorgan Slashes GDP Forecast For Remainder Of 2010

Tyler Durden's picture




 

As we expected, the murder (or whatever a group thereof is called) of wall street Ph.D. lemmings is appropriately positioning its collective tail between its legs and duly following Jan Hatzius into preliminary double dip(ression) territory. JPM's Robert Mellman just cut his Q3 and Q4 GDP forecast from 2.5% and 3.0% to 1.5% and 2.0%. The firm has not touched its 2011 estimates yet. Obviously once Q2 GDP is revised to sub 1% as we are fairly confident will be the final revision, it will. We are waiting for the hilarious capitulation from Wall Street's most discredited cheerleader: that of BofA's David Bianco.

 

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Thu, 08/19/2010 - 14:41 | 530989 DonnieD
DonnieD's picture

Oxymoron: Revised Up

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 14:49 | 531000 Conrad Murray
Conrad Murray's picture

Marge: Hmm... Homer, I'm very uncomfortable about having a gang of crows in our bedroom.
Homer: It's a murder, honey. A group of crows is called a murder.

I love that episode.  Can't say as much for the prospects of the US economy.  16% unemployment, 40 million on food stamps, near riots over housing vouchers...shit is whack outside of high finance lala land.  But hey, pot will soon be legal in Cali and we can all just watch our problems waft away on citrus scented clouds of Kush.

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:15 | 531064 Eternal Student
Eternal Student's picture

So what's a group of PhD Economists called? A "murder" does seem appropriate. But there has to be a better term. A dunce of Economists, perhaps?

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:26 | 531088 FEDbuster
FEDbuster's picture

A group of PhD economists is called a "cluster fuck".  The economy is best described as FUBAR (fucked up beyond all recognition).

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 22:03 | 531871 TwoShortPlanks
TwoShortPlanks's picture

What the hell's wrong with you people - and sorry to correct you here Tyler, but - the correct collective term usage is as follows: a 'Circle Jerk' of Wall Street PhD's. For the individual Doctor, it is simply, a 'Wanker Doctor' (perhaps even 'Me Monster').

If however, we were referring to the bankers on Wall Street, we would need to use the appropriate individual and collective term, such as: a 'Smeg' of Wall Street Bankers, or, that Banker is a 'Smeg'.

The key to understanding the difference here, is that it takes a team of Doctors to effectively change a light-bulb, whereas the Banker/s merely says "Fuck-it, let's just buy another Penthouse".

Stay on the same page people, this is basic shit!

 

PS. In case you're wandering, there is indeed a collective term for a President, as we can count on the multitude of conflicting personalities beneath the facade. We can say something like; there is a 'Disorder' of Presidents occupying the White House. This term may also encompass his or her ability to destroy the economy, saying; the Presidential 'Disorder' this year is remarkable.

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:27 | 531097 homersimpson
homersimpson's picture

DOH.

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 14:57 | 531031 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

JPMorgan Slashes GDP Forecast For Remainder Of 2010

Thus we see why the Fed is madly pumping away like a crew of thirsty cowboys at the bunk house well on a hot August day.

Got liquidity?

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:23 | 531080 the phantom
the phantom's picture

If the American people ever allow private banks
to control the issue of their money,
first by inflation and then by deflation,
the banks and corporations that will
grow up around them (around the banks),
will deprive the people of their property
until their children will wake up homeless
on the continent their fathers conquered.---  Thomas Jefferson

 

The more things change the more they stay the same.

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:13 | 531060 traderjoe
traderjoe's picture

Where's that bultard economist that keeps predicting a 250k payroll number "any day now"? And who suggested that jobless claims were the best indicator for the market (best negative correlation) - when they were declining? Joe LaVorgna?

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:23 | 531074 plocequ1
plocequ1's picture

What time does the stock market usually rise? I have to cut the grass, But I want to be inside before blastoff.

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:25 | 531085 Boilermaker
Boilermaker's picture

Now.

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:30 | 531107 chunkylover42
chunkylover42's picture

yep, you can see the ramp job today.  nice to be back to something so familiar.  took a little longer than normal, but we got there.

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:58 | 531123 plocequ1
plocequ1's picture

It's an absolute beauty.

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 16:03 | 531200 chunkylover42
chunkylover42's picture

it is, but it didn't take.  guess we ran out of suckers today.

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:47 | 531147 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

Look at all these upward gaps

http://yfrog.com/n1stockgapsj

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 21:38 | 531878 Hephasteus
Hephasteus's picture

What the hell kind of crap is that. That anyone would actually print that as data is ludicrous.

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:23 | 531083 Boilermaker
Boilermaker's picture

And....here comes the late day phantom rally of nothingness, right on cue. 

Ta-Dah!

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:26 | 531090 Gubbmint Cheese
Gubbmint Cheese's picture

here comes the ramp.. look at the volume of the SPY's.. something like 8m shares in under 5 mins..

so much for "best price" filling..

 

lol

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:26 | 531093 redpill
redpill's picture

These guys are about as timely as the credit rating agencies to a default party.

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:35 | 531095 John McCloy
John McCloy's picture

Keep ramping banks. You can have all the stocks you want. Just remember..you can never sell them...ever.In the meantime just hope a blackswan does not appear and you all do not attempt to exit at once..You can bring the dow to 14,000 and I would not buy a stock not even for a trade.

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:28 | 531100 Chemba
Chemba's picture

Jan Hatzius is of Goldman Sachs.  He is the most analytical and insightful economist on Wall Street (I know, "...duuhhh, that's not saying much, duhhh...").

Interesting how he is the most realistic forecaster, i.e. bearish, and yet that would seem to conflict with the Goldman Sachs narrative.  In fact, just this morning, a TD post suggested that Richard Ramsden is "contractually obligated to only make positive comments".  I wonder why that "rule" does not apply to Jan Hatzius?

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:51 | 531167 Apostate
Apostate's picture

You have no sense of humor whatsoever.

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 16:13 | 531234 Chemba
Chemba's picture

Oh, you mean the Goldman Sachs narrative is really just a humorous skit?  Oh, well, then, uh! ha ha ha!

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 15:30 | 531105 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

Thanks JPM for telling me how "now" the economy is not looking so rosey.  Please tell me now why the markets are reaching for 1080 with all of it's might on no news. 

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 16:41 | 531319 Jim in MN
Jim in MN's picture

How about a 'puddle' of Wall Street Ph.D. lemmings?

 

No.  Make that a 'piddle'.

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 17:02 | 531377 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

LOL

Quick, let's vote before a "piddle" of PH.D's show up and distort the results.

First use other than by the author right here folks. What do I win? :>)

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 17:07 | 531382 deadhead
deadhead's picture

Bianco is a joke.

 

that's all for now, folks!

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 22:26 | 531992 crosey
crosey's picture

The rats are fleeing the SS PPT.

Who cares what happens...I have my reputation to save!!!

Thu, 08/19/2010 - 23:53 | 532111 Bartanist
Bartanist's picture

Someone should just whack the JPMorgan econoPhDucks with that hockey stick!

Fri, 08/20/2010 - 01:01 | 532173 Mark Beck
Mark Beck's picture

To venture into negative GDP, as misguided as GDP is in describing growth, is really astonishing given the infusion of stimulus and the parade of mini-state bailouts.

Why?

It seems that both the state and the federal government cannot deal effectively with debt. For some reason nobody can effectively retire debt. The political capacity for inaction is just incredible. What are they waiting for? A complete breakdown in commerce.

Will the states crash and burn because they cannot take control of their finances. Meanwhile officials wonder why we are not creating jobs. A systemic collapse, destruction of fair and effective markets that form the basis of business growth.

When will they acknowledge the finite capacity to pay. Apparently just before default. This confusion is a huge disservice to business. A breakdown in political leadership, the new source of negative growth.

Mark Beck

Fri, 08/20/2010 - 03:19 | 532261 zhaowei
zhaowei's picture

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zhaowei's picture

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Fri, 08/20/2010 - 06:59 | 532331 MrTrader
MrTrader's picture

Repeated comments about impending GDP growth forecast revisions : what do they have to do with Europe´s and Asia´s and Sout America´s GDP ? Hum, anybody analyzing the wealth transformation process from the US to the rest of the world ? :=)

Sat, 10/02/2010 - 06:24 | 620565 Herry12
Herry12's picture

There are certainly a lot of details like that to take into consideration.I read and understand the entire article and I really enjoyed it to be honest.
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