Learning to Love the Carrot and the Stick of Personality Journalism

Marla Singer's picture

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digalert's picture

Gypsy? hey, I resemble that remark. e-mail me the new super secret scoop call in #.

Anonymous's picture

Evocative piquant defensive sarcasm duly noted as
Mr Market fit hits the shan.

To paraphrase All American Merrill Market Analyst BF,
"Weep not for the individual hedge fund day trader who
thinks for herself"


Mos's picture

off topic but HFT is being covered on Daily Show atm.


"So douchy traders are being replaced by douchy computers?"

OrganicGeorge's picture

Off topic but the Daily Show just did a story on HFT

Anonymous's picture

I'm not a daytrader

one_fell_swoop's picture

I yearn for the day when ZH commentary reflects that of CNBC, Cramer and my more enlightened Keynesian colleagues.  My current cognitive dissonance is giving me a headache, requiring ever greater quantities of beer to ignore.

Cognitive Dissonance's picture

I had nothing to do with your headache. It was Pigpen and Lizzy36 making out behind the dog house.

Anonymous's picture

i love carrots

Anonymous's picture

i love sticks

I need more cowbell's picture

I love the stick. Please include a red mouth ball, and wear a leather mask also.

Biff Malibu's picture

in southern illinois these are also known as "ball gags"...

Anonymous's picture

Maybe I can build a army of cheap computers that can do the trading during the long 5 minute waits for fishes to nibble on the bait of the ask price.

Anonymous's picture

Amen, love the cynicism and unbridled truth.

Gilgamesh's picture

For the last time, it was ABBA - not Air Supply... I thought you said you were a fan? 

Now you go and out me.  I finally see how journalism works; all brown-nosing before the article, and then nothing but slander in the real piece.  And, for the record, we prefer 'Goldbugs' or 'Armageddon Paranoid Wingnuts" to "Precious Metal Devotees."

D.O.D.'s picture

yeah, but you can't eat it...

SV's picture

It does bend when you bite it.  I find that I fall in the "otherwise unsuitable degenerates" category.  Must have something to do with that crappy song that I have in my head that keeps going "on and on"...  Oops, I'm showing my age - another demographic no-no.

chumbawamba's picture

You certainly can't snort any cocaine with it.  Damn.

I am Chumbawamba.

Cognitive Dissonance's picture

D.O.D. I know you speak in jest but you may recall some fine dining restaurants a few years back serving various desserts that were sprinkled with shaved Gold. I believe it was the sign of the market top if I remember correctly.

So there, put that in your ice cream and eat it. :>p

SWRichmond's picture

And, for the record, we prefer 'Goldbugs' or 'Armageddon Paranoid Wingnuts" to "Precious Metal Devotees."

Hear, Hear!  Proudly wear the label, my friend!  I think Marla was being kind....wait, did I just say that?

Anonymous's picture

I believe you have a bad case of megalomania.

You might want to try a dash of humility.

Hubris and pride generally come before an ugly fall.

See Eliot Spitzer.

Marla Singer's picture

Difference is, we don't fuck call girls.

(Well, I don't... I guess I can't speak for the rest of ZH).

Mos's picture

Damn, you just ruined so many reader's fantasies in that one sentence...

SV's picture

+1, coupled with the fact that everytime I listen to her spin I see Bellatrix Lestrange.

QuantumCat's picture

As long as you don't screw day traders... that's the exclusive domain of the FED and the US Treasury (and their lean six sigma consultant for market intervention... GS) 

I am a Man I am Forty's picture

Well then, I'm glad I'm not a call girl.

Philologus TaXitus's picture

I'm pretty sure his avatar is OSU coach Mike Gundy and his screen name is in reference to Gundy's rant against a sports journalist.

Cheeky Bastard's picture

who, what, where. im sorry but im kind of ignorant when it comes to american sport ...

Cheeky Bastard's picture

you should go on, and fuck a call girl Marla, its a nice experience; i did it on a more than a few occasions ( people can get lonely; so any judgmental commenter can blow me )...

I need more cowbell's picture

See, this is what is missing in the MSM. There is no feedback. Only in the blogosphere can you read a great article, see and contribute immediate feedback, and watch a thread de-railed into commentary about fucking call girls, with women ( well, cyber women, one never really knows ) no less.

MSM is so dead.

Anonymous's picture

Fucking call girls is the opium of the Zero Hedge devotee.

The blow-up dolls are for the FED.

Cheeky Bastard's picture

+ 10 on the power of  80 million

DrPsycho's picture

ok Marla, so what kind of girls do you fuck ?

Anonymous's picture

Perhaps some ability for readers to select which users posts become visible...like blocking some...or only showing users with a 3 star out of 5 rating or higher...

some way to keep more quality posters more visible...to keep things more focused for those who wish to do that

SilverIsKing's picture

You'll know you've really made it when some MSM company offers to buy your site.

Anonymous's picture

Brilliant, Marla.

Anonymous's picture

"We are losing the publicity battle in the mainstream press here."

My dear lady. ZH is not losing the publicity battle. Every time the MSM ('mostly' dead) acknoledge the mere existence of ZH, readership goes through the roof.

Publicity, good or bad, is the answer, not the problem.

MsCreant's picture

Dear Well Meaning Anon ZH Friend,

Do you not see the tounge firmly in the cheek?

MinnesotaNice's picture

I just love those... there is at least one everytime that misses the sarcasm  :-)

MsCreant's picture

I wish we could fuck them as hard as they tried to fuck you. ZH, I was going to tell you how disgusted I was with the conduct described and tell you I am sorry. But face it, this is apparently what is normal for them.

Joe Hagan lives in Brooklyn, New York.






MsCreant's picture


Not sure this is him, there is another one on [elided]


This is all public info, use your common sense.


[Don't do that... - Marla]

MsCreant's picture

Hey Joe,

If you are reading this, Marla just deleted what was potentially your address from my post to protect you. Sh!t head, she is showing you more care than you showed ZH, she is not willing to put you in harms way like you are willing to do to them. ZH has more integrity than I do, and certainly more than you.

Apologies Maam. I meant harm, it is true. I have been appropriately checked.

I am, after all, a Ms. Creant. I was merely enacting my role.

Miles Kendig's picture


Have some faith.  Remember that Sea Tec Astronomy becomes Screen Some Rot sooner or later.

MsCreant's picture

There is much in what you say that is true. Clever as hell just how much. :-)

Props bro.

Cindy_Dies_In_The_End's picture

MsCreant--You are assuming thay MSM readers will get off their bloated asses and "do" something to ZH. They are too busy with Dancing With the Stars now that American Idol is over to next season.

As for Joe, I saw a rumor on CL and freecycle that the entire contents of his house, cars, and pets were available at fire sale prices as curb side pick up. ;)


okay, just kidding Marla! Nobody better send a bunch of hookers to his office, either.


Ps- I'll never get why men dig the lesbo thing as much as they do. I am going to start posting pics of hot, naked men for the ladies!

Cindy_Dies_In_The_End's picture

Oh, and I love the day traders, but I am not one. I fall into the second oldest profession.