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Live-Like State of the Union Updates Pre/Post Game and During the State of the Union General Motors Halftime Show

Marla Singer's picture




Granted, we are working from a rather small sample size, as we don't often pay attention to State of the Union speeches, but if the pre-game hints of the potential blusterfuck post-game are any indication, the latest American Apology Tour is composed entirely of domestic flights, and filled with alliteration.  Like, for example, the gist of the pre-game talking points purportedly passed out by the White House yesterday (complete with patented Zero Hedge EasyStand annotations and unredacted staff notes):

Allow us to translate for you, as between the "law of threes" and the repeatedly awful attempts at clever word games, you are as likely to vomit up your lunch as to have your faith in the administration (or anything else) restored.

 

Topline Points: Pre-State of the Union

**Not for Distribution**

Rescue [from the second great depression], Rebuild [the economy- great job on this by the way] and Restore [America's world leadership in the category of kowtows per hundred foreign dignitary hours].  (Hereinafter "R.R.R.")

No president in our lifetime has ever faced the challenges Obama has.  ("...unparalleled in our lifetime.")  [I mean give the guy a break, it's his first year on the job].

$1.3 trillion deficit blah blah blah economy, two wars blah blah blah health care costs blah blah blah bush sucked blah blah can I borrow a dollar please please please blah blah blah.

Faced with daunting challenges [Plouffe, can we get Jack Nicholson in a Marine uniform to chime in "Is there any other kind?" for the cameras after the speech?] Obama took strong and politically-difficult [You were right Rahm, "politically=suicidal" didn't exactly convey a positive message here] steps to R.R.R. blah blah blah.

Within one month of his inaugural, President Obama had shepherded [no, really, they used this word] the most far-reaching [and most limited grasping] [Five Year] economic plan in American history.  One year later we are beginning to see signs of [something... Rahm? Line please?]

The President saved or created (approximately) -1 second great depressions.  [Phew!  That was close, eh?]

The third derivative of jobs is 10% of its previous level one year ago and if you double count the hunk of GDP from last year that went to taxes by counting it again when we spend it this year as stimulus, you can sometimes squint and see some unusual growths on the economy's pancreas.

The President has been laying a New DealFoundation for [non]working families, [formerly listed large-cap but now] small business owners and economic competitiveness [compared to Venezuela].

Changing the way business is done in Washington [yeah, that's true, actually] standing up to special interests [like taxpayers] and making government [inspectors general] more accountable etc. etc.

Blah blah blah Iraqhanistan-wait-what's-that-behind-you-I-could-swear-I-saw-something-now-it's-gone-where-were-we-again and strengthening ties with the people who ordinarily control the section of [the Islamic Republic of] Pakistan defined by the better neighborhoods in Islamabad and 50m on either side of the M-2 motorway.

We are closer than ever [except maybe 1994, 1962, 1958, 1955, 1947, 1931 and 1917] on real health reform.

President Obama has also signed historic legislation.  [Again, can we get a Jack with "Is there any other kind?"]

For the first time evv-ah every visitor to the White House is being put on a list, resulting in an important subsidy to manufacturers of SCIP/STE secure phones which are now used to conduct all secret meetings.  The reduced travel also creates a smaller carbon footprint, making this White House visitors program the greenest in the history of North American plate tectonics.

We've also eliminated the influence of [non-approved] lobbyists.

After one momentous year [we sure this is how we want to put this?] in office, President Obama has governed as he said he would, making tough decisions instead of deferring them, thinking about the long-term well-being of the country['s unions] and not just his own, oneshort-term politics.

Make sure to refresh this page during the address if you experience dizziness, nausea or incontinence.

8:01: No, Barry, there is no "on time."  There is only early or late.

8:02:  Joe Biden looks like an ad for Crest Whitening Strips.  Biden and Pelosi in the same shot is all the argument against HDTV that ever need be presented.

8:04:  We are rooting for Pelosi to hit Biden's hand with the gavel.

8:06-8:08:  That's a lot of clapping for a non-campaign event.

8:09:  Make it look good Pelosi.  Party unity.  Make it look good.  I mean it.  That's right.  Strong smile.

8:12:  The Teleprompter bounce (left... right... left... right...) in full effect.

8:13:  One year ago I took office with two wars... a disastrous economy and...

Does this self-congratulation ever get old?  Apparently not.  It is starting to feel like an old Yorkshiremen sketch.

Depending on what your definition of "strong" is, our Union is strong.

8:17:  Looks like we are in for the "double down" strategy instead of a move to the center.  Can't say that's surprising.

8:18:  We all hated the bank bailout.  About as popular as a root canal.  (Thanks, I'll be here all week).

8:19:  Unemployment might be double what it is today.  (Yes, he actually said this).

War declared on big banks.  Congress cheers.  That will about do it for our coverage.




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Wed, 01/27/2010 - 19:45 | Link to Comment jm
jm's picture

They desperately need a half-time snoozer show celebrity appearance...

Michael Buble singing "Pennies from Heaven"?

 

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 21:31 | Link to Comment Steak
Steak's picture

ALL WHO DON'T HAVE POLITICALLY INCLINED FRIENDS!!!

SOTU DRINKING GAME ON ZH IRC!

http://widget.mibbit.com/?settings=2c47eb3d297676f4aa7fcbfc65254485&serv...

here are the rules:

http://www.drinkinggame.us/

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:35 | Link to Comment strike for retu...
strike for return to reality's picture

Everything that needs to be understood about the US govt.

www.ae911truth.org

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 00:16 | Link to Comment Wilderman
Wilderman's picture

First time in 25 years of watching these events that I recall open, mocking laughter during the president's address.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 19:51 | Link to Comment Zippyin Annapolis
Zippyin Annapolis's picture

What they need is Change as in Change the subject--

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 20:00 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 20:04 | Link to Comment exportbank
exportbank's picture

I've worked in some "unusual" countries - when things got to be so funny that you knew the show couldn't go on much longer - it didn't.
It won't be a fun outcome.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 20:14 | Link to Comment Verum
Verum's picture

"The third derivative of jobs is 10% of its previous level one year ago and if you double count the hunk of GDP from last year that went to taxes by counting it again when we spend it this year as stimulus, you can sometimes squint and see some unusual growths on the economy's pancreas."

-Pure Genius, thank you Marla

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 20:18 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 20:29 | Link to Comment GlassHammer
GlassHammer's picture

I am cleaning my dishes. 

Let me be clear, there will be no streaks in order to make these dishes as transparent as possible.

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 09:06 | Link to Comment 35Pete
35Pete's picture

Make no mistake, sometimes you have to make the tough, unpopular choices, like Palmolive over generic, to assure the shiniest plates that all at the table deserve.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 20:31 | Link to Comment chet
chet's picture

The main purpose fo the modern State of the Union (no matter which Prez is giving it) is to give the columnists from Politico, Slate and Time magazine something to talk to each other about for a week. 

They'll blather on about how this is a "game changer" (good or bad) until they realize no one is listening, then they'll change the subject.

That's about it.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 20:32 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 20:34 | Link to Comment Tell me lies
Tell me lies's picture

Does anyone really need to watch this nonsense? I think we can all figure out what will be said and it won't be hope/change. That's in the crapper now thanks to S. Brown and the realization that the american public is pissed off.

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 09:07 | Link to Comment 35Pete
35Pete's picture

Sure. It's even better than South Park.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 20:34 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Thu, 01/28/2010 - 00:04 | Link to Comment Bob
Bob's picture

Perhaps it speaks loudly and clearly enough in and of itself, but I gotta say it anyway, anon:  Your brilliant insertions of the inital "H" (uh, geez, that would be Hussein?) were pure genius.  God, where do intellects of your caliber come from??  /sarcasm. 

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 00:35 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Thu, 01/28/2010 - 09:44 | Link to Comment Bob
Bob's picture

Oh, you really nail it here.  Some people would think that "W" was invoked to distinguish him from his near-predecessor by the same name if you left out the W.

AKA his Daddy. 

Not to mention that W was actually known as Dubya in his family.

It plays as patently racist ill will to cite it in the case of Barry (as Obama was known in his lilly-white family and community.)  It speaks for itself when people like you throw it out as if it were especially meaningful. 

About as cheap as you can get. 

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 10:08 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Thu, 01/28/2010 - 13:19 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 20:35 | Link to Comment Thorny Xi
Thorny Xi's picture

Marla, there are not many women who I'd marry without asking their last name but you are one of them.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 20:53 | Link to Comment 35Pete
35Pete's picture

Amen to that. 

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 21:44 | Link to Comment Dr Horace Manure
Dr Horace Manure's picture

Ditto.  At my age I have very few ambitions left in life, but one of them is to some day meet Marla Singer.

Maybe in a few years all of us Greatest Depression survivors can have a conference with Marla as our keynote speaker.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:09 | Link to Comment dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

you must be the oldest person on the internet..98?

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 01:40 | Link to Comment madRazor
madRazor's picture

Dude, what makes you so sure Marla is a female?

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 11:01 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 20:53 | Link to Comment 35Pete
35Pete's picture

Marla's my favorite blogger on ZH for a reason. LMAO. She's funny as hell yet gets the point across everytime. Let's face it. Some of this shit is dry. She makes it entertaining. Kind like laughing while wanting to put my fist through the wall from the pent-up frustration. 

 

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 20:53 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 20:54 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 21:08 | Link to Comment carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

Did they pass out a barf bag with those talking points?

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 21:12 | Link to Comment Kissy Ass
Kissy Ass's picture

Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla. Ohme, I missed you Marla.

I always thought the White House was constructed in such a fashion to out last the ravages of time.

But with our current leader the White House is starting to look like the Haitian Presidential Palace.

The collapsed cupola....

The ghetto that surrounds DC is enveloping 1600 penn. ave. it's morals, principles, and ethics.

Lie, breed, hustle. It's a Chi-town gansta's life.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:49 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 21:33 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

Where are the rating stars?  After playing the Obama SOTU drinking game (a shot every time O uses the word "I") for about 5 minutes, the comments here are going to be classic and should be rewarded.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 21:54 | Link to Comment 35Pete
35Pete's picture

I don't agree with using the word "I". I'm 43, the liver's already pretty well pickled, and I don't feel like having my stomach pumped tonight. 

Can we use another term please? How about "recovery", "reform", or "jobs"? 

Ahh crap, those will finish me off too. 

How about a drink every time he uses the phrase "spending cuts" or "prosecution"? 

We'll all go to bed stone, cold, sober.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 21:56 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

What about, "Let me be perfectly clear"?

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:03 | Link to Comment Transor Z
Transor Z's picture

Make no mistake...

 

And, you must do 5 quick shots with the invariable:

"The State of the Union is strong!"

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:54 | Link to Comment Yes We Can. But...
Yes We Can. But Lets Not.'s picture

Don't forget the:

 

We can all agree that....

and

No one would dispute that ....

 

 

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:18 | Link to Comment 35Pete
35Pete's picture

I'm dying here you guys. Sudden Alcoholic Hepatitis. Thanks. 

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 00:20 | Link to Comment Wilderman
Wilderman's picture

Playing on "Look..." I only finished two beers

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 21:42 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 21:54 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 21:56 | Link to Comment Marla Singer
Marla Singer's picture

My state of the art VoiceGenderChanger is constantly hooked up to the Zero Hedge hotline when I answer- along with the mic used for Radio ZH.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:15 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:46 | Link to Comment Marla Singer
Marla Singer's picture

No, it is an H&K p7m8. And yes, occasionally we get a nimrod or two who, despite the fact that I often answer the Zero Hedge hotline and yammer on aimlessly on the sporadic Radio ZH program as well as the One Hundred Trillion Dollar Pyramid, somehow manage to miss the fact that I'm a girl. Whatever floats your boat there, Anonymous.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:28 | Link to Comment Hephasteus
Hephasteus's picture

That's why the stock market is so easy to manipulate. People who are interested in it don't have very good powers of observation.

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 01:05 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Thu, 01/28/2010 - 09:16 | Link to Comment 35Pete
35Pete's picture

There's nothing sexier than a hyperintelligent, gun packing woman that's confident enough to call herself a "girl".

Marla. I always figured you as packing a .45 ACP.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:01 | Link to Comment Bolweevil
Bolweevil's picture

Keep your homoerotic fantasies in congress please.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:48 | Link to Comment Tethys
Tethys's picture

Negative Mr. Anon - Marla has teh sekse voice, have heard it on Radio ZH.  Would curl up at her feet for a nap any day.

+1 for the GP100, though: stainless revolvers are apocalypse/SHTF-compliant. Jam-free corrosion resistance ftw.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:35 | Link to Comment Kissy Ass
Kissy Ass's picture

Marla is a dude? Oh me Oh my! I'm putting away my lotion now.

But her stories are the best. They give me hope.

Like a high speed train project. The hope for mag-lev change so we can get from Tampa to Disney and save 30 minutes of total transportation time. YEA!! [arousing applause from the space monkeys]

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:37 | Link to Comment phaesed
phaesed's picture

Eh? Who cares? Marla is Marla, respect her wit, gender doesn't matter cuz you're most likely gettin none anyways.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:02 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:11 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:13 | Link to Comment ChickenTeriyakiBoy
ChickenTeriyakiBoy's picture

yes! she broke out the lavender !!!!

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:14 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

SEIU colors.   Yay.....

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:17 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

I hear about them in the letters I read.  He does have super powers.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:21 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:21 | Link to Comment phaesed
phaesed's picture

YO! Anyone just see Timmy??? Man, he looks like he went home and cried for 3 hours, LOL.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:23 | Link to Comment fuu
fuu's picture

Anyone getting a lie per minute count or anything?

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:23 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

I couldn't keep count and drink at the same time....sorry.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:39 | Link to Comment Unscarred
Unscarred's picture

I can't drink fast enough.  Time to set down the Maker's Mark and grab the bottle of Booker's.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:23 | Link to Comment THE DORK OF CORK
THE DORK OF CORK's picture

How many emotional strings is this guy willing to pull

He should be playing a Harp up there

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:26 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

Looks like he's only playing well to half the house.

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 10:30 | Link to Comment Master Bates
Master Bates's picture

Did anybody notice that the Republicans didn't clap and looked pissed off when he said "eliminate tax breaks for people offshoring our jobs?"

Or that the Republicans didn't clap and looked pissed off when he talked about "sealing our borders?"

Maybe it's because they have interests in offshoring our jobs and bringing in illegals?

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:28 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

Wait for it......"GREEN" jobs

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:29 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:30 | Link to Comment BoeingSpaceliner797
BoeingSpaceliner797's picture

standing up to special interests [like taxpayers]

LMAO!  You've set the bar high for 2010. 

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:38 | Link to Comment carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

Populist Rhetoric from a teleprompter president...

QE 2, Buy, Buy, Buy...

 

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 10:31 | Link to Comment Master Bates
Master Bates's picture

What do you call a president that sounded retarded even with a teleprompter?

"Uhhh... ummm... you can't get fooled again."

Illiterate?

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:38 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

There ya go.  Climate bill.  How does that square with a spending freeze?

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:41 | Link to Comment Unscarred
Unscarred's picture

How does the spending freeze square with the (cough, cough) tax cuts?

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:43 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

I wonder if anyone is calculating the cost of this speech by minutes?

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:51 | Link to Comment Unscarred
Unscarred's picture

I thought that the Stimulus Act included funding for 10,000 unemployed accountants to keep a running ledger, no?

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:39 | Link to Comment carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

He still thinks there's overwhelming evidence for global warming ???

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 01:02 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:41 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

Meanwhile, he puts a duty on Chinese electric blankets.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:42 | Link to Comment ChickenTeriyakiBoy
ChickenTeriyakiBoy's picture

MORE MONEY FOR AG EXPORTS.......WOOOOOHOOOOOOO....FUCK YOU AFRICA

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:42 | Link to Comment THE DORK OF CORK
THE DORK OF CORK's picture

He wants to export to us !

No Mr President we want to export to you.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:43 | Link to Comment Kissy Ass
Kissy Ass's picture

Mr. Obama is doing well tonight. Here is the latest picture of him for those not watching.

http://i50.tinypic.com/20uwro5.jpg

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:43 | Link to Comment Unscarred
Unscarred's picture

Honestly though, the $30B earmark from TARP for small business loans was a masterstroke.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:43 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Thu, 01/28/2010 - 00:27 | Link to Comment Wilderman
Wilderman's picture

My first thought was what does this equate to on DXY?  Granted we're not asking for much to double current exports, but how the hell do you even increase exports without a weaker dollar?  More subsidy?  Open source all our intelligence technology? (oh, wait, the chinese already did that...)

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:45 | Link to Comment Unscarred
Unscarred's picture

Oh, Christ!  $10K for a college education, and then only pay back 10% of your student loans, did I hear that right!?

(Hey, can we make that retroactive?)

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:49 | Link to Comment phaesed
phaesed's picture

Ya know???

 

Speaking of which..... Anyone notice how Mrs. Obama isn't exactly smiling during this?

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 00:52 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Thu, 01/28/2010 - 10:35 | Link to Comment Master Bates
Master Bates's picture

Shit, I wish it was 10k.  I go to a state school, am in my junior year, and have easily paid out 30k already.

It's you only have to pay 10% of your disposable income toward your loan when in repayment, forgiven after 20 years if you're most people, forgiven in 10 years if you're government sector.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:47 | Link to Comment carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

 This is turning out to quite a shopping list. I wonder where Bernanke is going to get the money...

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:48 | Link to Comment ChickenTeriyakiBoy
ChickenTeriyakiBoy's picture

come, let me show you my money tree

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:50 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

Here's a couple trillion dollars Congress.  Keep the change.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:48 | Link to Comment Kissy Ass
Kissy Ass's picture

Turtle on a fence post!

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:49 | Link to Comment Instant Karma
Instant Karma's picture

So buy nuclear stocks and energy service stocks. Sell the banks.

 

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:50 | Link to Comment Instant Karma
Instant Karma's picture

Screw Federal Health care.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:51 | Link to Comment Instant Karma
Instant Karma's picture

Obama care = early retirement for docs (like me). To many patients with too little reimbursement and no tort reform.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:52 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

Maybe I could interest you in some cash business on the sly.  Shhh.....

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:51 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:53 | Link to Comment THE DORK OF CORK
THE DORK OF CORK's picture

Some one tell this guy that this is not the mid 60s and LBJ was a terrible president.

This war on poverty thing is great but you cannot give trillions to banks and at the same time go for big fiscal spending even if you keep a reserve currency of sorts.

 

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:53 | Link to Comment Instant Karma
Instant Karma's picture

Obama was dealt a bad hand and made it into a disaster. Cut taxes for individuals and businesses and cut cap gains taxes. Be Reagan not Carter.

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 00:00 | Link to Comment DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

+1 Dr. Platinum

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:54 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:54 | Link to Comment spekulatn
spekulatn's picture

Brilliant, Marla. Fucking brilliant. :)

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:55 | Link to Comment Instant Karma
Instant Karma's picture

Now he's saying stuff that's just delusional. Line by line veto, hah! Oil companies and hedgies and 250K going to have higher taxes! Market is toast tomorrow.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:00 | Link to Comment Unscarred
Unscarred's picture

Don't you trust Obama with a scalpel?

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:57 | Link to Comment Unscarred
Unscarred's picture

So...  He's saying that he's going to cut taxes for 95% of Americans, small business owners, AND for large businesses that normally export jobs overseas.  Yet, he's admonishing the fiscal irresponsibility of the past decade, and explicitly hammering on the two Bush tax cuts and reckless government spending...  Gotta love politicians.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:57 | Link to Comment phaesed
phaesed's picture

WTF????? Executive order for the deficit reduction committee after it just got blocked????

The reduction committee was "given" powers that could not be regulated!

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:57 | Link to Comment Instant Karma
Instant Karma's picture

Did Obama skip the class on economics? Too many classes on community organizing.

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 00:30 | Link to Comment 35Pete
35Pete's picture

That was one of his early morning classes which he always overslept for. 

Unfortunately Into To the US Constitution was the class proceeding it. 

Thank God for him though that Advanced Manipulative Mass Psychology was a night class. 

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:58 | Link to Comment Yes We Can. But...
Yes We Can. But Lets Not.'s picture

Joker's doin' a friggin' stand-up routine...the man simply is not serious, not in his ideas or as a leader

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:33 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 22:59 | Link to Comment Instant Karma
Instant Karma's picture

How long does it take to become a citizen of Canada?

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:38 | Link to Comment Hephasteus
Hephasteus's picture

I had a couple friends get in big trouble trying to accidently smuggle dirt into canada. (Gardening bags of topsoil). So if you try it take a shower before you go. They don't like american soil. They kind of hassled the frenchies that were there and it flared up a big hassle because people were being unduly mean and disrespectful of each other. So don't be mean about french. It's kind of a sore spot.

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 00:32 | Link to Comment 35Pete
35Pete's picture

Which UN supranational regulatory body overseas the transportation of earthly organic matter across international borders? 

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 04:14 | Link to Comment Hephasteus
Hephasteus's picture

The department of whoever gives me more kickbacks gets to be right. Now you KNOW why god really wants that judge position it's FAT MONEY!!

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:00 | Link to Comment Instant Karma
Instant Karma's picture

He's slamming the supreme court right to their faces. Shit, he is Hugo Chavez.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:17 | Link to Comment Baron Robber
Baron Robber's picture

can't stand him but they deserved to be slammed for that

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 00:33 | Link to Comment 35Pete
35Pete's picture

+10000

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:37 | Link to Comment Transor Z
Transor Z's picture

It was a shit decision. The decision could have rested on much narrower grounds and didn't require overturning 100 years of precedent. Judicial activist as hell.

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 00:49 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Thu, 01/28/2010 - 00:54 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Thu, 01/28/2010 - 10:13 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Thu, 01/28/2010 - 10:25 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:01 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

Throwing the gauntlet down to the SC.  Nice building you got there...be ashamed if anything happened to it.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:01 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:01 | Link to Comment Yes We Can. But...
Yes We Can. But Lets Not.'s picture

Guy is taking the country down the drain and fukkin our kids and he seems to think it is hilarious...

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:01 | Link to Comment ChickenTeriyakiBoy
ChickenTeriyakiBoy's picture

alito take it easy with the head nods and shakes. it's......unbecoming

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:04 | Link to Comment Instant Karma
Instant Karma's picture

How many DJIA points do we lose tomorrow? I give it -100+

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:06 | Link to Comment ChickenTeriyakiBoy
ChickenTeriyakiBoy's picture

no way dude. bernanke's getting confirmed, like it or not

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:04 | Link to Comment Yes We Can. But...
Yes We Can. But Lets Not.'s picture

It is Bush's fault...it is the Supreme Court's fault...it is the Congress's fault...it is the bankers' fault...it is .....

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:05 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

Apparently he never read, "How to Win Friends and Influence People."

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:06 | Link to Comment Instant Karma
Instant Karma's picture

Just slammed the Republican Senators....why doesn't he just declare himself King and dissolve Congress and the Supreme Court.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:06 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

DOW futures up 40.  Anyone care to explain?

 

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:09 | Link to Comment Unscarred
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:11 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

Gotcha.  Up 50 now

 

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:11 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:19 | Link to Comment Tell me lies
Tell me lies's picture

The upside down thinking of the markets. The media will spin this into positive news for the market.(CNBC) Should be in the shitter but will not, shit maybe a +100 point day, I do see the dollar is reacting lower though.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:38 | Link to Comment The Deacon
The Deacon's picture

WHat do the Futures matter, and T A for that matter?  Do you think these markets are 'FREE'?

Basically prices and interest rates will be set where the gov thinks they should be.  The markets make the news, not the other way around.

 

"Markets up 100 - well, Dick, it appears investors LOVE the idea of Geithner and Bernanke staying on board, and all BO will do to re-establish America to its formal glory."

 

 

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:08 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:10 | Link to Comment Instant Karma
Instant Karma's picture

That's cool he's ending the wars in the Middle East. Hope that works out okay. What's could go wrong? Iranian nukes, resurgent Al-Queda....stuff like that.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:14 | Link to Comment phaesed
phaesed's picture

Oh bleah.... sure Iran has problems, but I'd say the biggest is that we have two large armed forces on both sides of their borders. Remove us and you remove a reason for them to continue to build.

Thu, 01/28/2010 - 07:09 | Link to Comment Anonymous
Thu, 01/28/2010 - 12:09 | Link to Comment chumbawamba
chumbawamba's picture

Yeah, they can't be responsible with nukes like us westerners.  I mean, they might actually USE them.

I am Chumbawamba.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:10 | Link to Comment Yes We Can. But...
Yes We Can. But Lets Not.'s picture

What, do they have Joe Wilson gagged tonight?

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:12 | Link to Comment Unscarred
Unscarred's picture

Nice.  Use Kennedy AND Reagan in the same sentence.  Very impressive.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:14 | Link to Comment Instant Karma
Instant Karma's picture

He just wants to do everything for everyone at the same times--except he's anti-business, anti-tax cuts, and pro-depression. Bummer.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:17 | Link to Comment Yes We Can. But...
Yes We Can. But Lets Not.'s picture

Never saw a gubmint solution he didn't like... sophomoric boob

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:16 | Link to Comment Instant Karma
Instant Karma's picture

He's getting into civil rights stuff....I'm fading. 20% unemployment by the end of his term. The economy is toast.

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:17 | Link to Comment suteibu
suteibu's picture

Canada, eh?

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:20 | Link to Comment Baron Robber
Baron Robber's picture

repubs will win in October and fuck it up just as bad. they'll cut taxes and increase spending like they did under that total fuck up Bush

Wed, 01/27/2010 - 23:20 | Link to Comment Baron Robber
Baron Robber's picture

repubs will win in October and fuck it up just as bad. they'll cut taxes and increase spending like they did under that total fuck up Bush

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