Lou Dobbs Is Probably Running For President

Marla Singer's picture

How else does one explain his rambling, otherwise totally off-topic "farewell" address on CNN tonight?  We never bought the whole "Lou Dobbs is going to Fox" story.  What, because he had some fiery comments about immigration at one point suddenly he's got the kind of right-wing credentials to be on Fox?  We think not (but we've been befuddled by stupidity before).  How absolutely apropos would it be to have a candidate for high office in the United States from the pinnacle of a toothless media establishment?

Don't think so?  Wait for it... wait for it....

And as for the important work of restoring inspiration to our great free society and our market economy, I will strive as well to be a leader in that national conversation.

Same vague, rambling and ultimately meaningless platitudes that have characterized national politics for the last 30 years.  Might as well be an announcement.

This is my favorite part though:

Over the past six months it's become increasingly clear that strong winds of change have begun buffeting this country and affecting all of us.

Gee, what ever do you think could "winds of change" refer to?

And now that you mention it... who, exactly, picked the background for this farewell segment?

 

Lou, buddy, the debates aren't for a little while yet.

America has just jumped the shark and the Sea Ray is fresh out of gas.

Still, there is a kind of symmetry to it all.  The guy certainly has the ego for national politics.  We wondered briefly if he might not be running for Congress, but a senior Zero Hedger pointed out that ole'Lou is smart enough to realize that you need 10 years in the legislature before you have any power at all to speak of.  The guy doesn't strike us as the patient sort once he gets moving.  Sort of like a loaded coal freight.  Sooty, lumbering and slow.  Full of it.  But also possessed of a great, languid and indomitable momentum.

Here's the whole thing.  Try to keep your soup down:

Tonight I want to turn to a personal note, if I may, and address a matter that has raised some curiosity. This will be my last broadcast here on CNN, where I've worked for most of the past 30 years, and where I have many friends and colleagues whom I admire deeply and respect greatly.

 

I'm the last of the original anchors here on CNN and I'm proud to have had the privilege to helping to build the world's first news network. I'm grateful for the many opportunities that CNN has given me over the many years. I've tried to reciprocate with a full measure of my ability.

 

Over the past six months it's become increasingly clear that strong winds of change have begun buffeting this country and affecting all of us. And some leaders in media, and in politics and business have been urging me to go beyond the role at CNN and to engage in constructive problem solving as well as to contribute positively to the great understanding of the issues of our day and to continue to do so in the most honest and direct language possible.

 

I've talked extensively with Jonathan Klein. John's the president of CNN, and as a result of those talks, John and I have agreed to a release from my contract that will enable me to pursue new opportunities. At this point, I'm considering a number of options, and directions, and I assure you, I will let you know when I set my course.

I truly believe that the major issues of our time include -- the growth of our middle-class, the creation of more jobs, health care, immigration policy, the environment, climate change, and our military involvement, of course, in Afghanistan and Iraq.

 

But each of those issues is, in my opinion, informed by our capacity to demonstrate strong resilience of our now weakened capitalist economy and demonstrate the political will to overcome the lack of true representation in Washington, D.C.

 

I believe these to be profoundly, critically important issues, and I will continue to strive to deal honestly and straightforwardly with those issues in the future. Unfortunately, these issues are now defined in the public arena by partisanship and ideology rather than by rigorous, empirical thought and forthright analysis and discussion.

 

I'll be working diligently to change that as best I can. And as for the important work of restoring inspiration to our great free society and our market economy, I will strive as well to be a leader in that national conversation.

 

It's been my great honor to work with each and every person at this wonderful network. I will be eternally grateful to CNN, to Ted Turner, and to all of my colleagues and friends and, of course, to you at home.

 

I thank you, and may God bless you.