M.A.D. - Meet Nuclear Fission

Tyler Durden's picture

And so Olli Rehn, piggybacking on all the recent nuclear hysteria, takes Mutual Assured Destruction to a whole new mushroom cloud level:


This is better known as "MAD - Fission" Fusion

And some other exercises in MADdening:


But, but, the recession ended 9 months ago? Unless of course those wily NBER "economists" were only keeding...

Yet this one is FTMFW:


$300 million in cuts on $20 trillion in deficits... Can excel even calculate that?

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Robot Traders Mom's picture

I don't know how any debt restructuring will take place w/out shit hitting the proverbial fan...

In an unrelated note to Robot, AAPL is getting ripped apart like a piñata at a Tijuana birthday…Down over $2 today alone and down over $30 from its high…Where is your Steve Jobs God now, you little dweeb? Actually ask your business teacher.

SheepDog-One's picture

Just wait until its no longer deniable that Apple cant get any parts from Japan. That Apple is full of worms. 

PS- Dont mention Robos business teacher to him, he breaks down in tears at the thought of more locker room touching.

Robot Traders Mom's picture

ha ha ha. I can guarantee Robot is the modern day equivalent of Lucas.

Popo's picture

> "I don't know how any debt restructuring will take place w/out shit hitting the proverbial fan..."

Exactly.  The "chain reaction" he's talking about is a deep flaw in their business model, and is frankly, their problem.   If their business model is so-flawed that a butterfly's wings can set off armageddon -- then I guess immolation is bound to happen.  

You want us to fix that for you, Mr. Banker?   ...Do I see you blowing all of us?

Monday1929's picture

In different contexts, and usually when they are desperate, They have admitted many times that "we are/were at the edge of a cliff" and that the entire system can come down any second. The MSM never focuses on that aspect of what they are saying.

traderjoe's picture

They will do everything to avoid a default of the system that benefits them so handsomely. We must default on them.

centerline's picture

While we love to talk smack about "sheeple", I think that most people on at least some instinctive level know that either things get better - or fuck it we are all screwed, so party on.  This shit has stalemate written all over it.

PY-129-20's picture

In German Media there is a report about the meeting of the BRICS countries and that they will rather trade in their own currencies than in the Dollar. They want to get rid of the Dollar dominance. It's not really new to some of us that are following this story, but this meeting is all over the news here. I don't find it even mentioned on the English Google News page.



Alexandre Stavisky's picture

No country for old men (watch those fleeing. some don't make it.  So too the wheelchair bound)


That village is the world marketplace destroyed by excess liquidity.

And we pretend (through changes in the unit of account) that we are on sufficiently high enough ground that we will escape.

When everything we materially value is fixed on the ground below.

Ransom's picture

The dollar as the reserve currency has been an advantage but I'm not so sure that, ultimately, we don't want it to lose its status.  Look at the trouble it's gotten us into thus far.

TumblingDice's picture

He sure knows how to keep up with the fads nowadays. I bet that guy made a killing trading pokemon cards.

hedgeless_horseman's picture
  • Europe could see some 'fallout' from this
hedgeless_horseman's picture
  • EMU says periphery rates are manageable and 'core is stable'
hedgeless_horseman's picture
  • We certainly don't want this to 'mushroom'
hedgeless_horseman's picture
  • Strauss-Kahn statements 'radiating' confidence
hedgeless_horseman's picture
  • Default would not lead to a 'new-clear' balance sheet
Herman Strandschnecke's picture

He suffers from Hyper-ventilation. I recommend a cold boron shower.

Hephasteus's picture

"$300 million in cuts on $20 trillion in deficits... Can excel even calculate that?"

Hooray for double precision floating point. 128 bits FTW!!!

yipcarl's picture

It's all over people, I wish we could just get on with it.  

Robot Traders Mom's picture

It doesn't hurt to keep preparing while you can...I am fine over-preparing as the case may be.

But yes, anyone with an IQ over 70 (roughly 6% of the population) is ready to rip the bandage off...

TumblingDice's picture

This is a dupe so I'll make some use of it. This guy knows full well that his comments move the euro, it is possible that he does not see the euro's determined trudfge higher as a good thing so he is trying to influence it down with his hysteria. Or he just doesn't know what he's doing. As stupid as he sounds I doubt it.

yipcarl's picture

It's all over people, I wish we could just get on with it.  

sangell's picture
04-14 10:54: EU's Rehn says cannot see private sector involvement in debt restructuring under current fragile situation in Europe Something about those 'stress tests' on the banks Ollie? Would that be the 'fragile situation' you speak of?
CrashisOptimistic's picture

Guess what, sports fans.  If you're running a bank and you know how this plays out YOU DO NOT DIVEST YOURSELF OF SWAPS.


Why?  To show it to your government puppets and explain carefully to them what happens if it blows up.  If they ask, Why didn't you divest?  Your answer is: We have to go to war with the Army we have.  This is the situation that exists.  We can't make it be something different after the fact.  So . . . you need to do whatever you must to prevent defaults.  Now, if you will excuse me, I have a more important meeting than you, Mr. Prime Minister.  That will be all.  Have a nice day.

Eireann go Brach's picture

There needs to be a behead a banker day in Europe just the way William Wallace would do it! I am still waiting for the IRA to deliver Rehn's head in a box to be delivered during a G7 meeting..

DoctoRx's picture

Which recession did you think ended 9 months ago?

Crisismode's picture

The same one that started up again 8 months & 29 days ago.

Sancho Ponzi's picture

From Engadget.com (data provided by IDC & Gartner)

1Q11 total US PC shipments down 10.7% vs. 1Q10



digalert's picture


"people are making a bigger deal of the debt than it is"


SheepDog-One's picture

Right, the debt is obviously no big deal. I mean, other than being mathematically impossible to ever deal with....other than that no big deal at all!

NotApplicable's picture

All they need to do is to buy enough time to ZIRP the entire curve, and "POOF!", they can roll to infinity.

Just gotta clear the minefield first with a little IMF QE.

defender's picture

What do you mean, impossible?  All that you have to do is devide by that square root of negative one and the whole equation becomes easy to solve. 

By the way, what is the mathmatical symbol for unicorn again?  I always forget that one.

ivana's picture

think this could be legendary statement (depends who's lender and who's debtor)

:-D ha ha ha

Can ZH establish continous thread for collection of the greatest bullshit statements and "opinions" from MSM and "nobel" winners??
... we could also continously vote, propose etc ... final and intermediate ranking BS awards etc
after all, these are epic times and so is the amount of crap served everyday

yipcarl's picture

It's all over people, I wish we could just get on with it.  

Crisismode's picture

You said that twice already.

cowdiddly's picture

Now thats the best avatar Ive seen in a while.

Cdad's picture

Speaking of Mutually Assured Destruction...is anyone else measuring the "GETCO" effect in equities today?  Holy crap...if this does not end up being a breakdown day, well, then I am not trading and this is all a hallucination I am having right now.  Someone quipped to me a couple days ago, saying "Selling makes stocks go up now."  Prophetic!

And here comes the President.  Will they buy Presidential remarks?

Bring on the zombies! 



However, selling on Apple still makes that one go down....so there is that.

SheepDog-One's picture

Thats Apple is full of worms, and the news that Apple has parts shutdown from Japan hasnt even entered into the cult-like Apple stock minions minds yet.

Cdad's picture

You know Dog, I could not even tell you whether or not Apple products are great.  I don't want to be zombified, so I don't touch them...but what I do know Dog is that the very best shorts are the most ridiculously over crowded longs...and I simply believe there is NO ONE LEFT TO BUY SHARES OF THE WORLD'S LARGEST ZOMBIE MAKER.

And yes...Apple is hiding a lot of things lately, including Japan and the health of their main man [did folk forget that one?]

Is that you Bueller?

SheepDog-One's picture

Im using an Imac right now, its a good computer. But the cultish nature of the company and its stockholder minions gives me the willies! 

Cdad's picture

NFLX rollover alert!  CMG reversal alert!  AAPL breakdown alert!  Has a GETCO algorithm died?  Are algorithms alive in the first place?

Now...I'm sure these things are bullish...in some weird, reverse double pathological, MAD, Banana Tree Republic, criminal reserve fractionalizing sort of way.  Li'l help?  My brain doesn't work that way.

UnRealized Reality's picture

Unbelievable, So they are going to wait until the whole fucking thing collapses to do something. God help us all!!!!

SheepDog-One's picture

Right! Why deal with it today, when theres always tomorrow and besides $9 burritos and lace bras are plentiful all day TODAY! Scam it all today, to get thru today, in order to try to scam it all up again another day!

topcallingtroll's picture

That is the southern european philosophy in a nutshell.