Name That Lie: Recent Fedspeak Soundbites

Tyler Durden's picture

Over the past two years here has been no greater soap opera (with our apologies to Congress, who we know is trying but is now well into B-actor territory) than that of the Fed's 13 Samurai (Bernanke and the 12 regional presidents). And since there is no TV Guide to summarize the key punchlines in any given month, today we commence a highlight reel of the most prominent (amusing, glaringly false, plain ridiculous) statements by various Fed officials. As this is the year where ever more attention will be placed on the fake debates by the Fed's even faker Hawk and Dove split, we are confident that it will provide hours of entertainment to see how those entrusted with protecting the US Dollar contradict themselves from month to month in their execution of job duties that are now nothing less than 100% political.

  • Bernanke ?Progress toward meeting the dual mandate expected to be slow (4-5 years). Fed has the exit tools but Bernanke implies a very slow exit. (1/7)
  • Hoenig ? Would like to normalise rates and shrink the Fed?s balance sheet. Fed policy may be causing an acceleration of land prices in the Midwest. (2/1)
  • Lockhart ? Still too early to declare victory. US jobless rate is unacceptable (1/31)
  • Fisher ? Would have voted against QE2. Have done as much as they can do for the economy, but not ?itching? to dissent. (1/20)
  • Bullard ? Too soon to reduce QE on improving economic outlook. Deflation risks have fallen, but still needs to see inflation move closer to his target. (1/12)
  • Plosser ? ?I wish we hadn?t done it (QE2), but that does not mean I want to stop it right now.? WSJ (1/11)
  • Kocherlakota ? ?The bar for dissent from the committee is going to be pretty high for me? I do not contemplate stopping QE2.? WSJ (01/10)
  • Yellen ? ?Inflation would have been 1 percent lower without asset purchases and it will end up creating 3 million private payroll jobs.? (1/8)
  • Evans? ?Rising rates are a reflection of improving conditions. Keeping an open mind on whether the Fed should expand QE2.? (1/7)

From SocGen

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Cognitive Dissonance's picture

All that ever matters during the latter stages of the POMO disease is what is said today combined with the amount of POMO injected into the financial bloodstream.

Everything else is dead and forgotten.

flacon's picture

Graphic image of a barbed harpoon (QE1, QE2, QE-Lite) killing the bull. Once QE goes in - it NEVER comes out until the bull is dead.


Commander Cody's picture

It never ceases to amaze just how much utter bullshit spews forth from the twisted minds of the Fed board, wall street hucksters, and, politicians in general.  Truth died a long time ago.

Life of Illusion's picture


no soundbites, just walked on stage.

New Revolution's picture

Let's see,... 12... plus 1, oh, and don't forget the FOMC members.... that come's to..... ah...20!   Yes, 20 ankle bracelets,.... and just enough chain so that they can get to the john, because you know they'll be spewing plenty of shit.

flacon's picture

Better yet, 20 gallows - no shit to worry about. 

nowhereman's picture

well just one time anyway.

sweaty7's picture

Most of these clowns at least temper their remarks with some remourse and/or regret that they're making a necessary evil type choice. However, that damn Yellen is just a moonbat. She is all in and giddy about running the printer and putting the final nail in the coffin.

Hedgetard55's picture

QE2 and QE Lite have juiced the market so high that if they do stop printng, the crash is going to be even greater and more destructive than it would have been. The Bernank will be fed to the Nile crocs in the Bronx Zoo if they catch him in the NYC, or at the Washington Zoo in DC if they catch him at FED HQ.

ZakuKommander's picture

No, no, no.  They have not modeled themselves upon samurai.  It's JC and the Apostles, don't you understand.  Where is Banzai with a Last Supper illustration when you need him?

palmereldritch's picture

Much more entertaining than if those statements were under oath.

wisefool's picture

Don't forget Bullard on CNBC a couple of months ago. (para)

Why is longterm unemployment bad?

"Because those workers lose those years from a normal earning/consumption pattern of life. They can't get those years of purchasing power back"

Since then Big Ben, has been making a point to say unemployment is bad because of skill and social atrophy.

But CNBC struck back today, half way joking on squawk about the unemployment numbers:"Why don't we just hire all the unemployed to work for the Fed? Good pay, Good Benes," ...... (mine) and it does not matter whether you do a good job or not ....

jakethesnake76's picture

     A colleague of mine sent this to me:

From the BBC - by John Cleese. 
The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." 
Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada
The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the Bastards." They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years. 
The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France 's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability
Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides." 
The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbor" and "Lose." 
Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels . 
The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy. 
Australia , meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be alright, Mate." Three more escalation levels remain: "Crikey!"
, "I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend", and "The barbie is cancelled."  

cranky-old-geezer's picture

What a joke, they don't give a damn about employment nor the economy, it's about transferring wealth to their banker masters, always has been, always will be.

QE isn't about liquidity nor recapitalizing, it's about handing America's wealth to bankers in exchange for worthless securities.

PulauHantu29's picture

Buy gold and oil and you will be ok imo.

Savers, retiurees, etc. who are in cash are getting hurt badly

gwar5's picture

(paraphrasing) Jim Rickards:

"The Fed is of the banks, by the banks, and for the banks. Their real mission is to benefit and save the banks. Their talk of a dual mandate to keep inflation and unemployment rates low makes good talk, and while this may be a good thing if it happens, that is not really what they are there to do. They are there for the banks. The sooner people grasp this, sooner the Fed's actions will begin to make sense."

In other words, they notion they are a government agency that are there for you is indeed an lie. They are there to protect the banks at your expense.