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New Suitors For NBC Universal And Its Botoxed Anchors Revealed; Myopic Men Of Mistaste Include Malone And Murdoch

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Did Comcast think it can poach the crack Power Lunch (no pun intended) CNBC team all on its own? Turns out the answer is a flat out no. According to Reuters not only will GE likely exit its Comcast venture within 4 years (apparently the Comcast deal is virtually a certainty now, much to the chagrin of the Squawk Box team et al), but others media conglomerates are also considering getting involved in what could soon become a heated bidding war for the ample assets partially hidden by various grotesquely stretched sweaters. Reuters reports:

Under the proposal, NBC Universal would become a joint venture 51 percent owned by Comcast and 49 percent by GE. It would be valued at around $30 billion. Comcast would contribute around $4 billion to $6 billion in cash as well as its collection of cable networks to pay for its stake.

The deal has involved a lot of back and forth negotiations between both sides.

But GE, which has been pressured by investors to offload its 80 percent stake in NBC Universal, is considering a host of proposals for the unit, as partner Vivendi SA (VIV.PA) explores whether to sell its 20 percent stake.

GE has negotiated a redemption option, that will give it the right to redeem all or part of its stake in the so-called 'newco' in exchange for cash at the three-and-a-half year mark and at a seven-year mark, the sources said. They spoke anonymously because the talks are private.

The new NBC Universal is expected to be able generate enough cash to pay down $9 billion in debt that would be added to its books as part of the deal, and purchase the rest of the company from GE.

And just because Rupert has no desire to see the World Leader in Propaganda News depart for the 120 mile one-way trip to Philadelphia, he may just do away with his current Fox Business venture and throw in his 2 cents into the bidding hat, ant-trust regulation be damned. After all Goldman already owns Canadian media; it is only fitting that an Australian would control US business news.

Rupert Murdoch's News Corp (NWSA.O) and John Malone's Liberty Media Corp (LINTA.O) are also interested in NBC Universal, though neither has approached GE so far, CNBC reported, citing sources.

News Corp, which owns the Fox cable network and local TV stations, had been seen as a less likely bidder, analysts have said, because taking a stake in NBC might raise antitrust concerns with the U.S. government.

The silver lining: neither Comcast, nor Liberty, nor News Corp, has a half a trillion finance subsidiary that has the second worst balance sheet after AIG. As such, it just may happen that CNBC will at some point soon return to providing a balanced and unbiased coverage of the markets. However, as Gasparino would say, the situation is fluid: don't turn that TV on just yet.

 

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Mon, 10/12/2009 - 20:26 | 97052 deadhead
deadhead's picture

Is this a victory for the bulls?

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 20:28 | 97055 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

Bear Sterns is fine; ITS FINE GODDAMIT !!!!1

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 20:40 | 97076 mikeyv1970
mikeyv1970's picture

Cheeky,  ever been to Macedonia?  Looking for places to visit when I am in the area...

-Michael

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 20:54 | 97087 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

Not in a while; but make sure you visit lake Ohrid when you're there; Italy aint got shit comparing to that place; absolutely stunning. Oh, and make sure you eat as much as you can while you're there; the food is absolutely FANTASTIC. And the people are awesome; just don't say anything about Greece or Greeks; they will kill you :D. And if you are into for an adventure visit Shutka, the largest Roma city in Europe and the BEST place for a party on the face of the Earth. Also, they love Americans, so you should be ok.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 22:46 | 97219 deadhead
deadhead's picture

Bear Sterns is fine; ITS FINE GODDAMIT !!!!1

I finished House of Cards 2 weeks ago. I'm halfway through McDonald's book on the Lehman implosion.

As far as I am concerned, what I have been witnessing of late from the Fed, Treasury complex is simply v 3.0

I honestly think I could write the book now and just fill in the dates and small details later.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 20:28 | 97059 Shylock81611
Shylock81611's picture

Does Maria B's gigantic ass carry a premium?

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 20:41 | 97078 Unscarred
Unscarred's picture

No, but her Hillary-Clinton-pant-suit-covered-PERMA-GUNT does take some of the shine off of the apple.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:04 | 97101 Marge N Call
Marge N Call's picture

ROFLMAO! Now that's hyphenation!!

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 22:47 | 97220 deadhead
deadhead's picture

In my part of the world, we refer to a "gunt" as a "fupa"

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 02:17 | 97311 Unscarred
Unscarred's picture

In my neck of the woods, I've learned that while those terms are completely interchangeable, their use is usually generational.  Personally, I grew up with the FUPA, but became enamored with the harsh sound of GUNT by my elders.

Given the context (mega hyphenating), I felt that GUNT would have more oomph behind it... but I appreciate your perspective completely.

The key to focus on here isn't the use of illiteration, but rather how yet another woman has completely let herself go, to the obvious disappointment of men the world over.

The "Money Honey" has become the "Lard 'Tard."

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 04:43 | 97332 Dr Horace Manure
Dr Horace Manure's picture

"Alliteration."  TD started it with his title to this post.

I won't even try to compete with you guys.

I am Chumbawynonnajudd

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 20:38 | 97062 etrader
etrader's picture

"heated bidding war for the ample assets partially hidden by various grotesquely stretched sweaters" :-)

Michelle's, Caruso & Cabrera's has been noted by the posters today.

Her agent should be taking notes of her key demo outreach.

Ms Drury is still  the bench mark, so expect a prime time move in the new year...

 

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 20:33 | 97065 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

i would place an offer for Amanda Drury and Tits Cabrera; those are the only ASSets I'm interested in.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 20:46 | 97081 Unscarred
Unscarred's picture

Nice call on Amanda Drury.  Bid to open...

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 20:45 | 97080 putbuyer
putbuyer's picture

This brother had it right back then.

by dza
on Tue, 09/08/2009 - 15:36
#62626

 

You guys are missing the big picture.

This is a recovery-less recovery. The lack of any future economic growth is already priced in to the fraudulent, profitless, consumer-less, Jobless, and moneyless, recovery.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 20:58 | 97085 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

The funniest part of today was simon hobbs (in for larry kudlow), who clearly did not get the botox, or the memo on how to play poker, cnbc style.   

His facial expressions while being lectured by a smug midget (with freakish white eyeliner) on the 5% expansion currently being experienced in the US, made my day. 

http://www.cnbc.com/id/15840232?video=1292887512&play=1

Tyler, top 10 headline and you know how high that benchmark is......

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:15 | 97110 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

The only time these dip ships talk about the alphabet is when discussing the so-called recovery. V this and W that.

Have you noticed the premise that is always slipped by the viewer in CNBC's Nazi style propaganda? It's always the type of recovery we are in, not if we are in a recovery at all and will we get worse.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:34 | 97134 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

I notice that all the time.

There is never a question of if.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:39 | 97140 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

You just noticed that now ? It's been happening since the bust of the dot.com bubble; there is never a question of IF; and some media structures have stopped using IF in the 80s.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:48 | 97151 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

No CB, like you have noticed for a very long time. 

But it has become particularly salient (at least in my simple mind) in the last 8 months. 

Or perhaps i am just more aware of what premises are being taken for granted.  And what questions seem to be off limits.

 

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:55 | 97161 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

language/logical structures like these are part of behavioral linguistics constructs which can effect a general state of consensus when it comes to stating some description of a state. Historically, they were used the most in the totalitarian regimes to enforce or re-enforce the position of a government or a certain individual. Nowadays you can find them almost everywhere. Logically, they are expressions of certainty and not possibility or contingency. It is a nice trick to use on the sheeple, but most of us can clearly see trough it. Mostly, constructs like these describe a temporal dynamical system which is either contingent or possible, but not certain, and therein lays the fallacy of such constructs; they are not true ( or are false ).

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 22:50 | 97223 deadhead
deadhead's picture

North Korea

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 22:57 | 97225 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

USSR ( 1917 - 1953 ), Germany ( 1936 - march 1945 ), China ( during Mao ), Yugoslavia ( 1946-1980 ), most African nations, USA ( 1963 - present time ), etc etc.

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 04:42 | 97331 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

CB, while most of us may be able to clearly see through it, the average sheeple can't clearly see and thus the reason they eventually fall for it.

Because the average person is (deliberately) ignorant as to how money and markets work on even a basic level, they take their cues from so called "more educated or enlightened sources" meaning our so called "free press."

If every mass media source they tune in to is talking the same game, while they hold doubts (setting up a cognitive dissonance) after months of this propaganda onslaught, they surrender (capitulate) and give into the wonderful feeling of pure natural brain dopamine being released as they no longer fight the cognitive dissonance and surrender to the squid.  

The sheeple do not like to hold contrary views and ideas. To be one with the herd feels so much better. Serenity now.

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 04:51 | 97335 Dr Horace Manure
Dr Horace Manure's picture

Moooooooooo

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 04:56 | 97338 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

tha fuck ? don't be an asshole; Cognitive D makes a superb point; the mentality of the Herd will eventually crash the world. Study the history of scientific ( or any other ) discoveries and you will see for yourself that the main component, besides knowledge and imagination, was a unique form of creative solitude. That what makes the world as we know it today, not the herd mentality.

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 07:56 | 97377 Dr Horace Manure
Dr Horace Manure's picture

Moooooooooooo.  I'm pretending to be one of the ignorant cows in the herd Cheeky.  I am not being critical.

I agree with everything both of you have said here.  Even the part about me being an asshole.

Remember, my other moniker is Arrogant Bastard.

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 08:06 | 97380 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

apologies then

 

You are not Chumbawamba; you are Chumbawannabe 

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 09:31 | 97436 Dr Horace Manure
Dr Horace Manure's picture

Precisely, so where is Chumbawamba?  I miss him/her/it.

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 09:48 | 97449 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

He's probably buying tons of gold and is torturing cats; he/she/it will probably join us later ...

Thu, 05/20/2010 - 13:52 | 363457 RockyRacoon
RockyRacoon's picture

Hey, Cheeky, hold off.  Torturing cats is my job -- and then I eat 'em.

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 09:21 | 97429 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

This is what I meant about a premise that's slipped by. It has become intense and any discussion in opposition to it is swept away as silly and not worth the effort to even talk about it.

Like a dog chasing it's tail, everything is supporting everything else, like a giant echo chamber.

This happens in politics all the time. Someone will say something on a Sunday talk show, it will be repeated in a newspaper as fact, which refers back to the talk show. Then, another politician says the same thing, referring back to the newspaper to substantiate it as "fact."

This is how lies and propaganda get "laundered" squeaky clean like drug money.

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 09:36 | 97440 Dr Horace Manure
Dr Horace Manure's picture

"A lie can travel half way around the world before the truth can even get out of bed."  Mark Twain. 

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:40 | 97142 Jendrzejczyk
Jendrzejczyk's picture

Not sure what was more disturbing in that clip Lizzy, the white eyes (tanning booth mini-goggles?), the pink tie, his gurgling phlegm or his solution to lower unemployment was to shaft the minimum wage workers a little more.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:09 | 97107 Anonymous
Anonymous's picture

I like stretched sweaters

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:10 | 97109 Anonymous
Anonymous's picture

TD-- we love the annoying alliteration affliction but let's move on from the CNBC obsession. They're a tired bunch of fools. Like the song goes, everybody knows...

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:31 | 97128 Anonymous
Anonymous's picture

I do not concur. Off with their talking heads.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:32 | 97130 digalert
digalert's picture

News Corp, which owns the Fox cable network and local TV stations, had been seen as a less likely bidder, analysts have said, because taking a stake in NBC might raise antitrust concerns with the U.S. government.

 

"antitrust concerns"? holy hell would be unleashed from the White house. They've already declared war on Fox. For that reason alone Rupert ought to pitch an NBC bid just for kicks.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:33 | 97131 Anonymous
Anonymous's picture

when i saw simon hobbs today on CNBC i kept waiting for him to break into song and sing, "come to the caberet old friend..."

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:35 | 97137 RobotTrader
RobotTrader's picture

Let's review the two most highly prized assets:

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:43 | 97145 Bolweevil
Bolweevil's picture

Thanks robo, TD was gonna leave us hanging with his,"botoxed" and "grotesquely tight sweaters" (is there such a thing?) and no pictures.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:44 | 97148 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

oh yes; excellent; thank you Robo; and you may as well include this photo of Tits Cabrera in one of your posts http://project000.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/2008/07/07/michelle_carusocabrera_bikini.jpg

 

 

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 21:57 | 97165 Unscarred
Unscarred's picture

Here's a little inside information on how she keeps herself so lean and svelt:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cX1viP3TkVA

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 22:03 | 97173 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

inside information ? don't tell me you work for the Beast ( i mean CNBS not tits Cabrera )

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 00:19 | 97277 Anonymous
Anonymous's picture

CLUTCH

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 04:48 | 97333 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

The graphic sexual image of a woman holding that device in front of her chest and face why shaking it was too funny.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 22:42 | 97218 Lothar the Rott...
Lothar the Rottweiler's picture

Just for a second I thought that boat name read Cheeky CB29, and I was wondering if you weren't telling us something. :)

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 22:53 | 97224 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

Lothar; oh man; i wish

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 04:55 | 97337 Dr Horace Manure
Dr Horace Manure's picture

Do my eyes deceive me.  Does the boat behind the beauty have "Cheeky Bastard" on it?

Go Cheeky.

I am not Chumbawamba

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 22:02 | 97170 Gilgamesh
Gilgamesh's picture

Don't forget about their other pair of assets from the land down under.  Some big city exposure is needed.

http://reportercaps.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=cnbc&action=display&th...

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 22:07 | 97177 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

ah, yes, she is a nice lass; you got to give props to CNBC on their anchorette choices

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 01:17 | 97298 morphizm
morphizm's picture

-100 on the death-mask brunette. No lips = no love.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 22:01 | 97167 Anonymous
Anonymous's picture

Comparing GECC's balance sheet to AIG takes away any valid points the rest of the post may have had.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 22:18 | 97190 trillion_dollar...
trillion_dollar_deficit's picture

I'd rather Liberty spend that money on my Braves.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 22:38 | 97213 Anonymous
Anonymous's picture

Having been there when GE took over RCA ( and NBC) by paying off Tinker and RCA chief its interesting to see GE fire selling the considerable assets of NBC Universal. Selling off the valuable cable networks and the Universal library in pieces would prob. bring more money then getting into bed with Comcast who's going to finance part of it by adding $9 billion in debt. That creep Jack Welch must be really pissed by Inwalt's stupidity. May they all suffer a DREADFUL PASSING.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 23:09 | 97241 Anonymous
Anonymous's picture

Ha, I thought that was Cheekers boat also. Until I noticed the Coor's. Cheeker wouldn't serve his beeches Coor's.

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 23:38 | 97258 Careless Whisper
Careless Whisper's picture

The best line I heard all night was from Bruno, a judge on Dancing With Stars, live,:"your dancing reminds me of the economy, each week you say it's getting better but it never does."

Mon, 10/12/2009 - 23:45 | 97261 Anonymous
Anonymous's picture

I don't know who crapped their pants first upon hearing this, Keith Overbite or Barry Obama.

L M A O

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 02:48 | 97314 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

Maria Bartiromo is so fat that she is classified, as of October 2009, as a celestial body.

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 03:18 | 97316 Michael
Michael's picture

First MSM TV news story saying the planet has not warmed since 1998.
Uploaded by yours truly.

Lou Dobbs: Al Gore, “Not Evil Just Wrong” Global Warming Debate Part 1 10/12/09
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2ujzfnC7cI

Lou Dobbs: Al Gore, “Not Evil Just Wrong” Global Warming Debate Part 2 10/12/09
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_bFAjssuJ2s

Tue, 10/13/2009 - 09:11 | 97419 Anonymous
Anonymous's picture

i only clicked on this thread hoping for some choice screencaps of stretched sweaters

glad to see i wasnt disappointed :0

Wed, 10/14/2009 - 17:55 | 99289 Anonymous
Anonymous's picture

I still can't believe you guys find that hooked nosed witch (as she was called circa 2003 on air) attractive.

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