Pandora Triggers $20 Sell Orders, Now Streaming "Timberrrrrrrr" By The Algos (2011)

Tyler Durden's picture

And it seemed like such a nice day for idiot momo investors everywhere....

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spongeBOB's picture

Tried shorting @23 but no shares available. You have to be a be moron to buy this stock at this premium.

knukles's picture

As the alarm clock went off, switched on the telly to CNBS to see the tapes, pre-markets, etc., and some overly siliconed airhead was mouthing what I'd assumed (volume off) to be platitudes about the IPO.  Accompanying her visual were bullet points about the company outlining the fundamentals/financials (What were fundamentals and financials, daddy?) and I wondered for a brief moment; "Who would buy that crap.  Musty be another Internet bubble. Hell, accompanied by a European National Treasures bubble.  And a let's declare him a bad leader and invade his ass bubble.  And a who listens to this crap anymore non-bubble. And a gold and sliver are useless crap that you can't even eat bubble.  As well as a don't worry be happy inflation is temporary because of emerging markets bubble.  And a let's print some more money bubble.  And maybe even a temporary default on the debt will be a good thing bubble."
So I went, sat on the pot and contributed my own bubble.
Now I feel a whole lot better.

Ya know, nothing so overrated as a talking head professional bankster/investor and nothing so underrated as just a plain good crap.  AAA across by all services.

Mr Kurtz's picture

Sometimes a "siliconed" stock babe is the only silver lining in an otherwise declining portfolio.

nope-1004's picture

This is one of the most over-hyped POS IPO's I've ever seen.  And as the CEO so eloquently said this morning:  "We respect the market price and respect the valuation the market puts on our stock".

Look out below.


Gold Man-Sacks's picture

Simon was asking the tough questions, but the lame-ass CEO wouldn't answer.  But of course, I agree with you; why would anyone want this stock?  It's not like their CEO was invited to Bilderberg last week (unlike Linkedin).

Problem Is's picture

" some overly siliconed airhead was mouthing what I'd assumed (volume off) to be platitudes about the IPO. "

You Mean Cramer the Clown?
Those aren't silicon... those are bitch tits...

fuu's picture

Hope was the only thing left in the jar.

HITMAN56's picture it...buyin ammo here

ThisIsBob's picture

Sock puppets, everywhere.

TruthInSunshine's picture

ZH and many other sites have been infected with Sock Puppets as of late.

They're easy to spot, as they work for the government, and those hiring standards are very low.

Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

Click the ads!  Click the ads!!

Id fight Gandhi's picture

Bwaaahaha. Only thing going for those is theyre too short to change the channel.

alien-IQ's picture

speaking of idiot momo investors...where's Robo?

SheepDog-One's picture

But...but....but...but....'hooray for Pandora! Mandatory IPO euphoria all around! Buy buy buy!' The central scrutinizer commands it!

spongeBOB's picture

The Fawking CEO was on TV this morning saying they have no plan for profits anytime soon.

Gold Man-Sacks's picture

But he had improving "operating margins," or someting like that.  He said it like 20 times, but it really wasn't worth remembering.

Ben Dover's picture

Hmmm... I have  no plans for profits anytime soon. Does that mean I am ready for my own IPO?

TruthInSunshine's picture

Happy LNKD to all the dips, too! $77 will look like a gift to sell within a few short months.

It may take another 26 years, if ever, but during the next '' bubble, I plan on creating and then IPOing a digital tulip bulb company, and I will name it, and have Goldman (or Goldman's successor) take it public and/or private.

cougar_w's picture

"Timberrrrr" by The Algos? That was last year's big hit.

You'd think they could come up with some new material by now.

fuu's picture

It's actually just a remix.

Dreadker's picture

I commented on the huffpost link following this... stated that its a demented decision to invest in a net loss company valued at $2.6bn... one person replied that if they make a 2.6 bn loss then thats a risk you take for a company with a bright future... think i might have to repost this chart on there tyler lol (stating source of course)

qussl3's picture

The irony is that LNKD has a far less sustainable business than P, yet it levitates while this one craters.


knukles's picture

Ah, but the NZA learns of your innermost thoughts and transgressions (confessions) on LickedIt whilst Pandora just plain offers no service/utility to the master information gatherers, whatsoever. 

Plus, Pandora weren't invited to the BuilderBug conference.
Go figgur.

Beatscape's picture

This reminds me of when 3Com spun off Palm in 2000 and Palm soared to be worth roughly 3-4 times 3Com within days.  That was the top of the dot-com bubble.  Pandora's IPO could well be the harbinger of the latest Fed attempt to make yet another financial bubble.  As of this morning, my trading account is 100% short.  The wheels are starting to come off the wagon.

Cdad's picture

I heard P represents a "cheap historical valuation."  Clearly, a "buying opportunity."

TruthInSunshine's picture

And Q comes after P in the alphabet, so my quick and dirty math based on historical Ponzi valuations tells me that it's trading at an even cheaper Hopium-Unicornian-PixieDust metric (the method first used by Dutch tulip bulb traders in the 1600s).

Buy lots and lots of Q!


"Q" Added To Stock Ticker Symbol
Overflow-admin's picture

I wonder if it could become more used on the stock ticker symbols than in french TV...


Du cul, du cul du cul que du cul!

SheepDog-One's picture

Damn youuuuu Pandoraaaaaaaaa!!!

dwdollar's picture

Isn't free streaming radio Web 0.5 or something?

digalert's picture

...and CNBS put their best pump on this pig.

Dkizzle49855's picture

Was at the gym this morning working out when the Shit-Stain CEO came on and pontificating about P for a good 15 minutes and I figured the azz clowns from CNBS kept him on to divert attention from all of the other dismal reports out this morning.  The guy has a PHD in bullshitting and couldn’t answer a single question in regard to profitability would result in him pulling a “Weiner” and regurgitating his talking points multiple times.   

Caviar Emptor's picture

Pandora does it to the world again!!!!!!!

Didn't we learn the first time not to trust her?

Markets should never have allowed her IPO just because of the Jinxx factor

slewie the pi-rat's picture

LOL!  same shit, diff day...

myths: 1

reason: 0

cocoablini's picture

Pandora is a cool outfit and service. Too bad it doesn't make a cent.
Who would buy this trash?
Its a free service- and they have like no revenue worth talking about. Man, who suckered the IPO market this time.
Hows that LinkIn doing.

Downtoolong's picture

There’s got to be a better way to launch shares of these new public companies which doesn’t result in so much risk and volatility. But why would the underwriters or anyone on Wall Street want to find it? That would probably take most of their trading profits out of the process. Ultimately, it hurts the companies by scaring many initial investors away. Even if I thought Pandora was a good investment, I wouldn’t subject myself to this kind of crazy price dynamic until the dust clears.

PulauHantu29's picture

"No one saw this coming..." they testified to Congress.

Gold Man-Sacks's picture

Their CEO sucks.  I wish Mark Haines would come back to bitch slap him.


Missiondweller's picture

As soon as the underwriter's support period is over, this dog is dropping below its IPO price.


Even CNBC seems to be making fun of them.

TruthInSunshine's picture

Sell-Siders screaming get some! while mowing down the sheeple after they've already unloaded.

American idle's picture

Pandora CFO: Stephen Cakebread.
"Dude, if I had the cake, we could have made soo much bread on the Pandora IPO".
--- E-Trade baby.

American idle's picture

Pandora CFO: Stephen Cakebread.
"Dude, if I had the cake, we could have made soo much bread on the Pandora IPO".
--- E-Trade baby.

Buck Johnson's picture

They had 10 years to make something of it and they didn't make any money for 10 years.  I bet they company couldn't get the IP back then because of all the other companies during the dot.con that didn't make money but had IPO's from 10 to hundred dollars in one day.  So Pandora was able to finagle something with a few major banks by giving them most of the shares and them floating only 9 percent.  Then when they went to market, the insiders who he said didn't sell (yea right, there's many ways of selling stock buy selling the stock they own to others.  This way they can say we didn't sell into the IPO, because they already sold long time ago), sold and that is why pandora is a buck and change over par.  As soon as this was hyped, it was sold.  Goes to show you that people don't care about this rigged casino, they just want to make as much money as they can before the implosion.