PPT Stuck In Line To Purchase iTimberrrrr App For iPhone 4

Tyler Durden's picture

The sudden and dramatic absence of the Liberty 33 folks can only be explained by their realization that there's an app for market crashes. Alas, they have to wait in line like every other Steve Jobs fanatic. That's the only explanation one can come up with to explain why the market is plunging. Nothing else that makes sense: the economy is flourishing, Europe is hella strong, China is growing like a weed, the Baltic Dry is going to the moon, there are 5 jobs for every American, US debt is negative, one month T Bills are not negative. In other news, 1,040 taken out. 865 next stop.

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SignsAndWonders's picture

maybe they already have the app but are just holding the phone wrong?

Assetman's picture

I'm thinking the HFT autobots have put their well used iPod app in reverse.

What's the opposite of "stick save"????

Don Smith's picture

I'm pretty sure the opposite of the stick save is known as the "Robert Green", formerly known as the "Bill Buckner".

Assetman's picture

LOL!  That was pretty good, Mr. Smith!

jkruffin's picture

That app only works on the I-pad, sorry for the confusion.

traderjoe's picture

Just wait until the BLS can't even manufacture positive private job growth on Friday. State and locals are a slow motion train wreck...and BB looked positively stricken when meeting with the Teleprompter yesterday. 

RichardP's picture

So the Dow will be back around 10,000 at the close on Friday then?

I think the PPT is standing in line for the premiere of Eclipse today.  They will be back tomorrow.  Unless they really like the movie and go to see it again.


MarketTruth's picture

My guess, BLS aside, is that they need to paint 'panic' to get QE2 going for the UK/EU/USA. As such, they need another financial flag event to then scare congress and the EU/UK to do a synchronized QE so all currencies devalue at the same time. Simple as that actually imho of course.

Then again i do not have a PHD in economincs Ben Shalom Bernanke & Cie. ;->

Overleveraged_and_Impatient's picture

Yeah everyone knew it, just nobody knew WHEN..

Muir's picture

Don't be so honest Overleveraged.



Komarovski: There are two kinds of men and only two. And that young man is one kind. He is high-minded. He is pure. He's the kind of man the world pretends to look up to, and in fact despises. He is the kind of man who breeds unhappiness, particularly in women. Do you understand?



Cursive's picture

Rod Steiger was excellent as Komarovski.  And Jule Christie....everytime I hear Laura's Song....

barkingbill's picture

komarovski just wanted in her pants. 

Fred Hayek's picture

Everyone wanted in Julie Christie's pants.

duo's picture

Gromyiko:  This is the last half of the last cigar in all of Moscow.

MrTrader's picture

Hum, 95 % of ZH readers KNOW EXACTLY WHEN. That´s why the site exists only of multi millionaires...hum PAPER millionairs not GOLD millionaires...let me rethink, in Tyler Durden langauge : toilet paper trillionaires. Sorry for the confusion...:=)

Adam Selene's picture

Looks like the robots all went off line about 3:10.  Can somebody reboot the servers before it's too late to hold the SPX to the required level?  This absolutely will not do.

Mactheknife's picture

Correctomundo!  SDS Bitchezs!

DosZap's picture

 "Europe is hella strong"...................only Germany is Smokin'!!!!!!.

And they are the object of hate, by all their SO called Pardners'.

Crisismode's picture

But then again, Germany has been beloved by its Euro pardners throughout history, no? I mean, what have they done to antagonize any of their Euro siblings over the last 1000 years?

The Franchise's picture

Never too late to the party though, here comes the PPT.

Turd Ferguson's picture

25% chance that this is a tremendous fake out and the rally re-commences tomorrow.

75% chance that we are headed directly to 860.

However, with only 6 minutes to go, it does look like closing above 1083 is out of the question.

AndItsGone's picture

Oh, GS. They only missed their end-of-H1 SPX target by 277 points. Go easy on 'em.

AlienTrader's picture

It's hard to think the PPT just gave up now and accepted defeat. I expect several meltups that will cross 1040 again. What it would be more unbelievable is that GS finally got it right on the market.

still kicking's picture

I'm in the 25% camp, this just feels like a big big set up.  Time to suck everyone in one last time.

Muir's picture

Harvey 'Big Daddy' Pollitt: There ain't nuthin' more powerful than the smell of mendacity!

Zina's picture

Cheering against the PPT in the last five minutes of the quarter is more exciting than cheering against Argentina in the last five minutes of the match.

Slash's picture

word. this is really exciting/fun to watch!

AR15AU's picture

Inverted stick save!

Young's picture

No, I got it now... PPT is actually run by jobless people who are actually between 18 and 25, and now that they've noticed that their antennas in their new debt bought iphones are broken they have resorted to selling themselves in order to pay for the repairs. Unfortunately no one will buy their sexual services since they're all so damn fat/obese/ugly because of their slacker parents who couldn't show them any discipline with either finance or food growing up. Welcome to America, welcome to the west. Idiots in all ages. I'm gonna kill myself now! Damn, out of shells for the twelve gauge! Plan B. Moving to China...

barkingbill's picture

i told you guys the dead cat bounced so many times, he started to fall apart. it was a mess. they need a new cat

cougar_w's picture

Sorry, I'm booked. Maybe next crisis. Stay in touch.

Cognitive Dissonance's picture

They're using cougar to mop up the oil "spill" one cat at a time. Dip, soak, squeeze, repeat. It's gonna be a long hot summer in the Gulf, both for the residents and cougar.

There's gotta be a better gig than that cougar. :>)

glenlloyd's picture

They'd be better off with 600 gross of shamWOWs

cougar_w's picture

I'm set actually. Touring with Lady Gaga next month, just down GoM way working on my tan. I'm on the beach, and next thing you know I'm attached to a pole and they're mopping up oil with me. I figure, I bet this one of those reality shows I walked into, you know where they fake all kinds of crazy stuff. I'll be famous. But I haven't figured out yet how to get all this oil off me. The Lady Gaga production crew will stick sequines all over me if I show up sticky. I hated the last time they did that; everyone thought I was a gay Republican but I'm not, I'm a predator damn it.

Oso's picture

not gonna happen, QE 2.0 of 3 tril will happen.  Obama is stupid, but he isnt dumb, he knows consumer confidence is tied 1:1 with the market.  Bernanke is many times stupider, so guaranteed something happens.


Im as bearish as they come, but Im not getting shorter into this.

Al Huxley's picture

I think what we're seeing now, though, is what happens when the marginal return on debt drops below 0.  So now all that new debt doesn't generate GDP (dubious as that measure is for evaluating the state of the economy) it actually reduces it.  There's no saving this now.

mikla's picture


Every dollar spent now reduces GDP by ten cents.

Yeah, right, spend away, and watch your GDP drop like a ROCK.

First There Is A Mountain's picture

Even RAMMING through QE 2.0 will take some doing . . . and time. Keynesian clowns are being shouted down pretty openly now. Not so sure a few sane voices won't simply admit we need to take our medicine, clean up those balance sheets, etc. TBTF in question?

cougar_w's picture

They could do QE2 on the sly, call it national security, and tell 3 people in Congress.

They might have started about 60 days ago.

It is already too late; QE1 was too small by half for the intended purpose (not saying I agreed with the purpose).

Now QE2 will just make the skid marks a bit longer and the smell of burning rubber a bit heavier in the air.

Because this bitch is locked up and aiming now to skid off the road.

jkruffin's picture

Like I said the other day, any stimulus had better go to the people this time, or there will be blood riots in the streets of major cities.  The people are not going to stand for it this time, knowing what happened last time.  Blankfein and Dimon might wanna go underground for a while.  Write your lawmakers folks, and demand any future stimulus goes to the people in their pockets to boost the economy or else.  They tried it their lame way and it didn't work. Now try a bloggers way.  We aren't as stupid as the FED thinks.

Cyan Lite's picture

I don't think "the people" even know what QE is or care.  Ask 10 people in your local Wal-Mart what they felt about the QE 1.0 and most will think you're talking about a movie or something.

DosZap's picture


Your correct sir, 95% do not, but..put Benjamins in their mailboxes, NOT jus $500.00-$1000.00,but a few grand, and it WILL be spent by 90%............and not on their debt reductions.