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Presenting Apple's Historical Cash.... In Billions

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Presented without comment. Well one - debt: $0.00. With $50 billion in Short and Long Term investments, Apple could be the second largest hedge fund in the world.

 

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Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:01 | 1471849 bankrupt JPM bu...
bankrupt JPM buy silver's picture

Yup got me the iphone 4, hate to say it.  Unfortunately, b/c of the strength of this piece of shit, I got smoked on my LULU Puts.  Thanks Steve.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:06 | 1471875 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

HTC Sensation > Samsung Galaxy S2 > iPhone.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:08 | 1471890 robertocarlos
robertocarlos's picture

Survey says iPhone users are the happiest smartphone users.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:09 | 1471892 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

Survey says CPI overestimate true inflation.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:10 | 1471899 quintago
quintago's picture

Probably one of the best performing as well. Back out the Net Income from the increase in investments, annualize the return, and I'd say they're pretty slick at cash management too!

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:35 | 1472008 dropdeadfed
dropdeadfed's picture

Isn't that because 30% of them think they already have 4G service?

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 18:24 | 1472139 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

LOL. So true. Your comment reminds me of my heated discussions with Adelphia on why the fuck is there a HDTV charge on my bill when your broadcasting in analog.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 18:34 | 1472161 Hephasteus
Hephasteus's picture

I hear wireless N is a standard as well. And people are going to deliver 60 watts of juice through ethernet to power a monitor and TV from a wire the size of a human hair.

FUCKING NUTS EVERYWHERE!!!

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:15 | 1471923 Manzilla
Manzilla's picture

So should I sell my AAPL and buy Samsung instead? Sounds like a losing trade to me...for now.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:07 | 1471882 Manzilla
Manzilla's picture

I'd say you got smoked on the LULU puts because you got in front of a freight train. When it falls it will tumble but you at least gotta wait for the price/action to indicate something other than everyone and their grannies buying this thing.

I'm sorry to hear about that.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:10 | 1471898 robertocarlos
robertocarlos's picture

To understand LULU you must see a beautiful woman carrying a little LULU shopping bag as she walks through the mall.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:17 | 1471929 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

What the hell is a LULU anyway?

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:21 | 1471953 Manzilla
Manzilla's picture

I see my beautiful girlfriend wearing it. I still don't understand it but I sure do appreciate what they make. Nothing more attractive than seeing that intelligent and beautiful woman doing some yoga in the LULU wear.(No she'd never read this post I just can't help myself whenever the time arises to pay the girl a compliment. I hit the jackpot.)

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:30 | 1471982 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

I just checked out their website for the first time and holy moly man!!!!  Do you know how much she is paying to walk around in her underwear?

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:25 | 1471966 So Close
So Close's picture

Apple is a diamond...  In a pile of shit....   

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:27 | 1471973 Manzilla
Manzilla's picture

I wonder if a monkey would fling that diamond with said shit or if it would remove it first.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:32 | 1471993 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

It is a status symbol.  How many people need apple products?  There are not that many graphic designers out there.  People spend their money on ipads to check their facebook from.  Get a grip.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:59 | 1472079 Troublehoff
Troublehoff's picture

I've always been a fan of open source, none control freakery - and have always built my own PC's from components - I'm definitely not your typical style guru designer Apple user with square rimmed glasses

...but 2 years ago I bought a Mac Book Pro not because I liked Apple (because at the time, I detested them) but simply to write iPhone Apps, to make money.

Well, I've used this Macbook most days for the last two years, usually not plugged in and the battery life is legendary, still above 90% of what it was brand new and way better than most laptops being released today. It still looks brand new, I've had no viruses, the quality of the screen is immense and the mousepad kicks the shit out of anything i've used on any other laptop, and in fact, some actual mice.

The only complaint I have is that it's not ideal for outdoor use due to its glossy screen which reflects the sun back in your face.

Quite simply, with Apple, you get what you pay for. Same with the iPhone - that said - they are total bastards with their development program, and make it as difficult as possible to release an app.

 

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 21:19 | 1472572 mkix
mkix's picture

Agreed,I understand that people hate, and dubbed the fraise "apple tax," and I get. I love my MacBook Pro. It's a fuckng tank! I lugg this around everyday to work and back (I have one scratch on it for 2 years). Do that to a Dell latitude! My $3,500 macro at work has run photoshop 8 hours a day, 6 days a week, for 6 years and won't die! If it does, plug in a FireWire cable, restart and hold down the letter "t" and everything is okay! What the fuck windows, they came out with that in the early 90's!!!

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 22:48 | 1472759 cheesewizz
cheesewizz's picture

Sorry on your lulu puts, But don't blame aapl. lulu has been breaking shorts backs for some time. Who you going to blame for cmg,nflx,ext ext....

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:03 | 1471850 Doyle Hargraves
Doyle Hargraves's picture

The total is about equal to one month of ben's printing during QE2 Bitchez!

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:25 | 1471967 Manzilla
Manzilla's picture

But I thought if we taxed companies with huge cash positions our problems in this country would be solved. It's funny to think that even if the government just took AAPL's cash it wouldn't even fund a month of the trash they blew money on.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 18:00 | 1472082 Doyle Hargraves
Doyle Hargraves's picture

That doesn't even include all the toxic garbage ben acquired from the banks that is just the figure for money printing.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:02 | 1471856 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

iPads will be the new currency.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:03 | 1471858 Commander Cody
Commander Cody's picture

So.  What's Steve worth?

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:08 | 1471888 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

Quite a lot but his warranty is almost over. He broke the seal...

 

 

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:10 | 1471901 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

What does it matter.

He is 57 year old, one of the leading business visionaries of the 21st century, and in 12 months will in all probability (99%) be dead.

From when he was 29 years old. And just days away from being fired from Apple.

Well worth the time...Trust.

http://www.scribd.com/doc/43945579/Playboy-Interview-With-Steve-Jobs

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 18:25 | 1472141 4shzl
4shzl's picture

Amazing interview -- thanks.

Wed, 07/20/2011 - 01:57 | 1472965 PeeTee
PeeTee's picture

+1

So we actually read Playboy articles now?

Wed, 07/20/2011 - 03:51 | 1473029 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

                             GETTING OLD

                      Baby Boomers '1960 VS 2000'
Then:   Long Hair
Now:    Longing for hair

Then:   The perfect high.
Now:    The perfect high yield mutual fund.

Then:   Keg.
Now:    EKG.

Then:   Acid Rock.
Now:    Acid Reflux.

Then:   Moving to California because it's cool.
Now:    Moving to California because it's warm.

Then:   Growing pot.
Now:    Growing pot belly.

Then:   Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your parents.
Now:    Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your children.

Then:   Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor.
Now:    Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor.

Then:   Seeds and stems.
Now:    Roughage.

Then:   Popping pills, smoking joints.
Now:    Popping joints.

Then:   Our president's struggle with Fidel.
Now:    Our president's struggle with fidelity.

Then:   Being caught with Hustler magazine.
Now:    Being caught with Hustler magazine.

Then:   Killer weed.
Now:    Weed killer.

Then:   Hoping for a BMW.
Now:    Hoping for a BM.

Then:   The Grateful Dead.
Now:    Dr. Kevorkian.

Then:   Getting out to a new, hip joint.
Now:    Getting a new hip joint.

Then:   Rolling Stones.
Now:    Kidney stones.

Then:   Being called into the principal's office.
Now:    Calling the principal's office.

Then:   Screw the system!
Now:    Upgrade the system.

Then:   Peace sign.
Now:    Mercedes logo.

Then:   Parents begging you to get your hair cut.
Now:    Children begging you to get their heads shaved.

Then:   Take acid.
Now:    Take antacid.

Then:   Passing the driver's test.
Now:    Passing the vision test.

Then:   "Whatever"
Now:    "Depends"

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:03 | 1471860 ads56
ads56's picture

Too bad that the dollar is down 30% since then.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:03 | 1471862 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

Apple should just use the $80B of cash on its balance sheet, lever it 10x and buy Europe x-germany.

problem solved.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:19 | 1471940 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

igreece

Wed, 07/20/2011 - 05:36 | 1473073 anony
anony's picture

I-taly

I-reland

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:03 | 1471863 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Wow why doesnt Apple just become a bank?

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:04 | 1471864 camaro68ss
camaro68ss's picture

If only they made eatible Ipads.  hummmmm

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:04 | 1471867 Hondo
Hondo's picture

Why don't they pay a dividend....and don't tell me they need to reinvest in the business because this proves they don't

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:26 | 1471972 Agent P
Agent P's picture

Because they're planning for the future...it costs a lot of money to cryogenically freeze a CEO and transplant his head onto a jeans/turtleneck/sneakers wearing robot to run the company in perpetuity.

All kidding aside, I think they're hoarding cash for a shock and awe dividend/repurchase announcement when Jobs finally succumbs to his ailments.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:08 | 1471874 Manzilla
Manzilla's picture

Oops. Double post.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:07 | 1471877 DutchR
DutchR's picture

Apple'iances save the world!

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:07 | 1471878 Jumbotron
Jumbotron's picture

On Steve Jobs return to Apple, Michael Dell of Dell Computers stated that the best thing Steve Jobs could do for Apple was liquidate the company and give all the money back to Apple shareholders.

This coming from a genius who made cheap copies of PC's with an operating system that Bill Gates copied from Apple.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:10 | 1471902 Buckaroo Banzai
Buckaroo Banzai's picture

LOL, what else would he say about a competitor that he obviously feared.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:07 | 1471880 robertocarlos
robertocarlos's picture

That looks like the national debt except it isn't steep enough.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:09 | 1471893 Dick Darlington
Dick Darlington's picture

+1

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:07 | 1471883 Lazane
Lazane's picture

all that cash might someday have to be transported around in wheelbarrows

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:08 | 1471889 HowardBeale
HowardBeale's picture

Interesting: The SPY's gone nowhere afterhours. 

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:14 | 1471919 inkarri9
inkarri9's picture

I believe that is because the weighting of Apple stock was reduced drastically months ago.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:09 | 1471891 kaiten
kaiten's picture

So, perhaps, they could move some production back into US?

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:10 | 1471900 Jumbotron
Jumbotron's picture

Sheep dog one stated....

Wow why doesnt Apple just become a bank?

Haven't you heard?  Apple is buying Bank of America. 

Behold....iBank.

Start a passbook savings account and get a free iPad !

Wed, 07/20/2011 - 03:56 | 1473034 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

I know a good joke when I steal one:

"In this economy:  Buy a new toaster, get a free bank!"

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:11 | 1471905 Gubbmint Cheese
Gubbmint Cheese's picture

All Apple needs to do is add about 12% to its share price and it will be the largest company in the world (mkt cap).

Bigger than Exxon and Petrochina..

lol - crazy

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:11 | 1471908 equity_momo
equity_momo's picture

80b in cash and no dividend. Ummmmm? K

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 18:46 | 1472199 cramers_tears
cramers_tears's picture

1000 shares of each 1/2/87.  Msft@.166 & Aapl@5.30 - Guess who blew the doors off who?  While I may have some legacy shares of Aapl... I've never bought their shit...  too proprietary... too troubling... too many coodies... have you ever had an Aapl computer go bad?  They make nifty boat anchors.  My droid was free.  My salesman's iphone - $399.  He's been back to the store several times - antennae problems + other problems...  my cludgy old droid... never a hint of trouble.  I'll take the droid and my free google gps, office, gmail, gvoice, google+, etc... Aapl may have no choice but to press their patent claims if this keeps up.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:11 | 1471909 economessed
economessed's picture

They could put it all in a money market fund and earn 0.00036% apr.  Thank Ben.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:11 | 1471910 HowardBeale
HowardBeale's picture

So with that kind of money, Apple, by definition, has become a hedge fund--to go with its cult-priced computers. I love 'em too, but can't get myself to pay twice as much. Can a cult live forever?

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 19:20 | 1472278 andybev01
andybev01's picture

Look at the catholic church.

Wed, 07/20/2011 - 05:33 | 1473072 anony
anony's picture

...and the Orthodox ones, and the Muslims, Buddhists, Satanists, Pagans,  (which I favor because they have the most fun), and witches covens. 

Let's get more democratic.  Include all organized religious myths that last for millennia. Maybe even forever.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:12 | 1471913 poggi
poggi's picture

If AAPL is successful in pressing patent rights, it will eat Google's lunch along with all the Droid makers.

 

Where's Reggie Middleton when you need him?

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:15 | 1471926 HowardBeale
HowardBeale's picture

Puking.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:26 | 1471968 I am a Man I am...
I am a Man I am Forty's picture

Great question!  Where is Reggie??  Heeeyyy Reeeeeggiiieee, whatcha doing??

 

Sorry to rub it in, but he was spewing a bunch of nonsense that so many douches around here bought without question cuz he threw a ton of numbers out there.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:15 | 1471921 Highrev
Highrev's picture

Why necessarily a hedge fund?

Why not just balanced portfolio asset allocation?

 

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:17 | 1471932 HowardBeale
HowardBeale's picture

Not their money.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:15 | 1471922 TradingJoe
TradingJoe's picture

QQQ "only" .25c up @ 59.10?!?! This sucker should roar now that we know the almighty APPLE has "beat" all "estimates" :)))!

62% From Abroad, eh?!?! Hmmm!

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:17 | 1471933 equity_momo
equity_momo's picture

Sobering to think that in 2012 when the GEC -thats global economic collapse , i know its catchy - unfolds , their sales will be falling 90% y-o-y. This is the ultimate bubble people. We have a sovereign NIGHTMARE unfolding and within a few short years all those plebs lining up for their I-whatsit 4 will be starving. Seriously. STARVING.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:20 | 1471950 HowardBeale
HowardBeale's picture

True. While Apple is doing a great job, the overall market movements are truly starting to feel just like the first NASDAQ bubble. 

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:26 | 1471969 Cheesy Bastard
Cheesy Bastard's picture
Presenting Apple's Historical Crash.... In Billions
Wed, 07/20/2011 - 02:09 | 1472977 chump666
chump666's picture

haha

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:18 | 1471935 monopoly
monopoly's picture

What a company

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:18 | 1471936 johnconnor
johnconnor's picture

Apple, the perennial sand baggers....

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:20 | 1471938 dogismyth
dogismyth's picture

The TOP 100 companies by market capitalization

http://fadi.el-eter.com/top-100-companies-with-largest-market-cap.html

 

That total's around $12 trillion dollar of wealth just in the top 100 companies.  And to think some people actually believe the fed and/or the treasury run our economy. 

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 19:22 | 1472288 andybev01
andybev01's picture

They need the Fed, as the Fed is their accounting department.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:19 | 1471942 tmosley
tmosley's picture

Swimming upstream against a torrent of dollar devaluation.  Only up 50% (rather than 200%) in terms of gold.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:24 | 1471964 Hansel
Hansel's picture

Whatever they do, THEY BETTER NOT GIVE IT TO THEIR WORKERS!  Those Chinese making the iCrap don't deserve more than $5 a day!  Those profits are for executives and rent seekers only!

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:28 | 1471977 tmosley
tmosley's picture

Those aren't "their" workers.  Those factories are contracted to make iCrap, and are owned by Chinese businessmen.  If you have a problem with their working conditions, you can take it up with them, or ask Apple to.  

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:25 | 1471965 John McCloy
John McCloy's picture

They got cash..they make good products and this is what we should all be admiring when looking for companies to invest in when the great reset occurs. As doomy as we are for the right reasons there is absolutely nothing wrong with this company doing it right and getting theirs..that is capitalism however they need to recognize how contingent their earnings are on outsourced labor and the margins they enjoy which are not sustainable.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:38 | 1472014 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

Fuck that!  They enslave their workers who try to kill themselves by jumping from the upper floors of the warehouse before working another day in their plants.  Adam Smith may be proud of Steve Jobs, but his conscious weighs heavy on his soul.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 19:25 | 1472299 andybev01
andybev01's picture

Jobs traded his soul to go to the head of the transplant line a couple of years back.

Wed, 07/20/2011 - 05:28 | 1473070 anony
anony's picture

Just a wild guess but I would bet anyone, any sane person on this board, possessing his fortune and contacts would do the same thing if they had his disease.

Ayn Rand is still right.  

My only regret was selling it about 2 years ago in the 70s.  

Wed, 07/20/2011 - 09:31 | 1473406 ZeroHour
ZeroHour's picture

One notable exception:

Walter Payton (the ultimate sports class act) didn't use his fame and fortune to get to the head of the line.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 20:37 | 1472471 ToddGak
ToddGak's picture

Sorry, gotta call bullshit on that.  Yes there were a couple suicides at the FoxConn plant, but the suicide rate of the workers there is lower than the suicide rate of China as a whole.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:29 | 1471979 digalert
digalert's picture

Looks like a country...hey wait a minute?!

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:31 | 1471990 A Dutch on Meth
A Dutch on Meth's picture

5000 new viruses a day for macs, enjoy your 'safety'.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 20:38 | 1472473 ToddGak
ToddGak's picture

What kind of nonsense is that?  It's very well known that Macs are much safer virus-wise than PCs.

Wed, 07/20/2011 - 07:37 | 1473161 A Dutch on Meth
A Dutch on Meth's picture

They used to be, but only because of the small market share Apple had.

With increased market share you get more viruses.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:34 | 1472004 dropdeadfed
dropdeadfed's picture

That's because 30% of them think they have 4G already....

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:40 | 1472015 boricuadigm-shift
boricuadigm-shift's picture

Plot that cash in Ozs of Gold to see how that pretty graph turn into shit!  Flat at best!

:-)

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:37 | 1472016 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

I wonder how much gold AAPL is holding?

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 17:40 | 1472025 chump666
chump666's picture

i own a motorola xoom...damn fine tablet.  Apple is a bubble

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 18:25 | 1472140 candyman
candyman's picture

my x father in law who literally changed light bulbs at their facilities sold his 10,000 shares for a split adjusted 10 bucks in 92. what a dumb ass.

Wed, 07/20/2011 - 00:26 | 1472909 Baptiste Say
Baptiste Say's picture

Would be nice if someone with some graphing software can represent their cash holdings in REAL terms for example:

 

-Graph them in ounces of gold.

-Graph against Shadow Stat's Figures.

-Represent them as a percentage of M3 over the time period shown.

 

My MSFT Excel graphs won't cut it.

Wed, 07/20/2011 - 02:06 | 1472975 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

they need money to build their Cupertino Apple Spaceship office. seriously. They are building a spaceship.

Wed, 07/20/2011 - 02:14 | 1472981 chump666
chump666's picture

Lets see if that nothing volume panic buyup is maintained into Europe's open...somehow i think not.  The EZ is a c-hair away from a bond/liquidity crisis (after the ECB reveals it's now a toxic entity...), then there is the dregs of the inflation crack boom Bernanke gave as a gift to the world sans the food riots.

.

Wed, 07/20/2011 - 02:15 | 1472982 chump666
chump666's picture

the doomsday trade is back on.

Wed, 07/20/2011 - 05:24 | 1473069 anony
anony's picture

It could be deduced then that the lower tax a company pays, the more spectacularly successful it is. 

Great for shareholders, founders, employees, and suppliers.

 

 

Wed, 07/20/2011 - 10:15 | 1473514 HUGE_Gamma
HUGE_Gamma's picture

they need to hire some ex-Eagle Scout, debate team captain, Wharton/ HBS MBAs with the CFA, CPA, FRM, CAIA, CFP, CIC, CIMA, CFS, FINRA series 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,11,55,56,65,72.. and set up the 2-20

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