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Presenting DSK's Brand New $14 Million Tribeca House Arrest Palace

Tyler Durden's picture


DSK's torturous stay in corporate housing for the average joe, even for those from IMF bailed out countries, is coming to an end. Next stop: a $14 million palace just purchased by the missus at 153 Franklin Street, half a block away from iconic TriBeCa eatery Bubby's. From the WSJ: "David Bookstaver, a spokesman for the state court system, said that New York Supreme Court Justice Michael Obus approved Mr. Strauss-Kahn's move to a new residence during a conference call with his defense attorneys and prosecutors on Wednesday afternoon. Mr. Bookstaver said he doesn't know where Mr. Strauss-Kahn's new residence will be or when he will be moved." Damn it sure is good to be married to a billionairess, who will do everything in her power from preventing her husband's improprieties from spilling over into her own social scene.

A brief description of the 4 bedroom, 4.5 bathroom townhouse which was recently listed by StreetEasy as costing $13.995 million.

One of a kind 27 ft wide townhouse on a beautiful cobblestone street in
the heart of Tribeca. Exquisite top to bottom renovation by famed
Architect/Designer Leopoldo Rosati just completed with only the finest
materials and craftsmanship. Lower level: State of the Art dBox Motion
Controlled Theater, Gym, Spa Steam Bath, Bar. First floor: Nanny/Guest
Suite w/bath & separate entrance, Boffi Kitchen with Miele &
Gaggenau appliances, limestone radiant heat floors, great room with
large skylight and fireplace. Second floor: Antique French wide plank
oak floors, two bedrooms with custom closets, Italian limestone bath
with Duravit jet tub and waterfall shower. Large planted terrace with
Japanese paper glass wall and Wolf natural gas grill. Third Floor:
Master suite w/wide plank floors, wet bar, his/her walk-in
closets/dressing rooms, Limestone bath w/Duravit jetted tub & dual
rainfall steam shower. Entire home features Italian cabinetry, new
windows, custom steel staircases, Control 4 automation system with
custom lighting & speakers throughout.

And some pictures of the palace. Our advice to Tribeca maids: avoid.





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Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:00 | 1311192 Ray1968
Ray1968's picture

Ass-Raping bastard is getting a pretty good deal, I'd say.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:06 | 1311462 Loonie
Loonie's picture

Indeed. Plus, I wonder if he's gonna get to choose the maid himself. Who knows.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:28 | 1311549 ml8ml8
ml8ml8's picture

When he moves into his permanent room in Rikers, the contrast will make it that much  more painful.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 03:16 | 1312204 Michael
Michael's picture

What a disgusting shit hole of a place that is. It gives a whole new meaning to the words "Lipstick on a Pig".

27 foot wide? My Garage is 27 foot wide with 10 foot high ceiling. Does the house at least have a two car garage like mine? Forget that dump.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 04:00 | 1312264 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture

somehow i don't think that's the way most will see this.  these pictures and the dsk accusations are indeed useful material for education of the masses in the ways of the elites.  the control frauds are somehow too complex and dry to heat the blood but the illicit/criminal sex combined with over the top opulence might do it.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 06:14 | 1312344 Husk-Erzulie
Husk-Erzulie's picture

It's shamefully vulgar, tawdry even.  Wife should be arrested and charged with apallingly bad taste.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:34 | 1311568 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

that's "maidS" to you.  MaidSSSSS.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 23:52 | 1311874 Edmon Plume
Edmon Plume's picture

"Nanny/Guest Suite w/bath & separate entrance..."

Well now.  Sounds like the perfect set for DSK.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 05:43 | 1312329 Mentalic
Mentalic's picture


Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:42 | 1311587 Sparkey
Sparkey's picture

Come on now Ray! A man that rich can't be bad.  I'll give a rich guy the benefit of the doubt anytime! I wonder what  really happened that day! I'm sure it would surprise us, Do you think she will get a lot of money out of all this and return to Africa and live out the rest of her, short life as some kind of a celebrity for having brought the rich European down??

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 01:26 | 1312080 Transformer
Transformer's picture

He's been set up.  He predicted he would be, just like this, in an interview just a week before it happened.  And this gem, a man who has just committed assault and rape and is trying to escape, calls the hotel from the airport to tell them he left his cell phone and would they please forward it to him?

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 06:53 | 1312380 schizo321437
schizo321437's picture

If you read about him and his reputation some time ago, you might have had an epiphany and realised how to destroy him. The public are such firm believers in DNA, and they can`t get over their class resentment.


The Liberation article was made up though. It came out after the allegations. It`s weak because it can be taken either way.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 08:41 | 1312612 trav7777
trav7777's picture

lol...I can't believe the numbers of people rushing to his defense or when a crooked oligarch scumbag gets busted, assuming that it was some vast conspiracy to set him up.

News flash:  the guy engaged in illegal behavior just like Spritzer did. 

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 12:03 | 1313389 ToNYC
ToNYC's picture


I've heard an agent running advance payments through the Guinean wronged woman's book rights is actually paying for his digs.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 20:56 | 1311199 Josh Randall
Josh Randall's picture

That's how the Illuminati roll - get baked down in public but live like a King behind the scenes. Whether he was set-up or not, I hope someone $h!ts on his pizza when people find out he's their newest tenant

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:13 | 1311264 ??
??'s picture

so where exactly  did Ms S-K get her billions from??




Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:02 | 1311210 uno
uno's picture

I fell sorry for the stuffed animals, they are gonna be raped senseless.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 20:59 | 1311213 Korrath
Korrath's picture

Jesus H. Christ.  His wife paid for this?


She does know what happened, right?  I mean, even if he turns out to have been set up and the whole sordid affair was consenual ( I'm not saying it was )...I would still imagine that sticking your penis in the maid's mouth would be considered uncouth by the wife, if not outright fucking vulgar.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:03 | 1311232 Ben Dover
Ben Dover's picture

Actually I think this was paid for by about a dozen African countries. 

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:05 | 1311241 knukles
knukles's picture

The fine line between uncouth and vulgar is illuminated (snigger) by whether said penis was inserted into a (as in any) rectal cavity, first.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 00:28 | 1311965 dhengineer
dhengineer's picture

Jeez, my wife won't even let me date, let alone do something like this.  If I was in his preDICKament, she wouldn't buy me a house.  Instead, I'd have to sleep with one eye open and wear an industrial-strength cod-piece 100 percent of the time...

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:03 | 1311218 Mad Max
Mad Max's picture

So this is better than Rikers Island, huh?

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:03 | 1311219 RobotTrader
RobotTrader's picture

I told 'ya guys this Plutocrat was going to get off easy....

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:08 | 1311246 Ben Dover
Ben Dover's picture

and you was right.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:17 | 1311274 Trillax
Trillax's picture

... and I don't think anyone disagreed. How's those assless chaps and/or Footlocker doing? I mean really.

Who has gone into a Foot Locker since you could wear 'Hypercolor' and fart different colors?

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:37 | 1311579 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

i think that was the maid's original complaint actually:  "he got off WAY to easy."  and then after a thoughtful silence the police were about to ask...but then she screamed "AND THEN HE...

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:03 | 1311221 knukles
knukles's picture

Nice job for a socialist if one can get it.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:03 | 1311231 Spalding_Smailes
Spalding_Smailes's picture

Pussy Galore

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:06 | 1311249 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

Ok, so, I was thinking...everybody thinks this was a setup, including DSK, as he had said months ago that Sarkozy would set him up as a rapist.  Then why did he not travel with his wife?  I would have had my wife with me wherever I went.  I would have had her in that hotel room with me, that is for sure.  So I got to thinking, is he on the take?  Was he blackmailed?  I am just saying, because once again, if he knew they were gunning for him, why was he acting so lame and traveling solo?

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:34 | 1311320 knukles
knukles's picture

" he on the take?"

" he on the take?"

As head of the IMF, a global bankster's bankster with no official oversight by anybody or anything which even gives a rats ass?  Head of an organization which systematically even by the Rothschild's own words, "enslaves with debt", rapes and pillages whole entire fucking countries, redistributing the riches to developed world governments and the rich and powerful.  Imagine the freedom of unquestioned wire transfers to and from, through a non-audited international supra-national bank.  No different than the Fed or any other such institution with no oversight.

The power and magic of sending money unquestioned to or from any where in the world.  Where the fuck do all those peanut farmer third and fourth world dictators who are weaning their countries on the IMF teat send their money to?  IMF funds?  Anybody wanna bet who gets cuts of the pirated loot?  Just another conspiracy theory, another meaningless fantasy, another novella in the history of mankind.

" he on the take?"

Fuck no.

He was on the take.

Who, for example is gunning for Greece's gold reserves?  The EBC and IMF.  They want the shit as collateral, knowing full well that the borrower (Greece) is going to go belly, subsequent to having been jammed with additional debt. 

Ever fucking heard of Fraudulent Conveyance?

Was he on the fucking take?


In the interest of full disclosure, I have never met DSK, never worked for the IMF, do not know his wife, I am not aware that I would, do or don't know any of his other victims, couldn't care less about getting a job there or in any other similar institution, have never to my knowledge benefited directly of indirectly through any IMF program, and don't even like the fucking French because as an Anglo, got pissed upon by the arrogant little pricks one too many times.  And no, it's not a resentment, just plain fucking Karma, dude.


Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:49 | 1311416 nmewn
nmewn's picture

"As head of the IMF, a global bankster's bankster with no official oversight by anybody or anything which even gives a rats ass?"

Warming up the me me, da da da...

"Head of an organization which systematically even by the Rothschild's own words, "enslaves with debt", rapes and pillages whole entire fucking countries, redistributing the riches to developed world governments and the rich and powerful."

La la me me...

"Imagine the freedom of unquestioned wire transfers to and from, through a non-audited international supra-national bank.  No different than the Fed or any other such institution with no oversight."

Figaro, fiiigaaarooo!!!


Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:01 | 1311453 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

Good rant, but I think you missed my point.  My question is, did someone say they would kill his family and kill him unless a spectacle was made of his nature.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:10 | 1311473 knukles
knukles's picture

I apologize.  I did miss that.  By a mile.  But had fun going down the path I'd chosen.

Oh, and about him getting knocked off?  You just gave me an idea!
Yeah, if he knows too much and gets the old El Pissoed at either being set up or not being bailed out with a mere slap on the hand, there could be many who might think he'd possibly be too big a song bird for their good. 

Yeah, a right bloody Ramond Chandler novel.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:18 | 1311501 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Personally, I think he cares about his family as much as he cared about the maid.

Prolly jus me though ;-)

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:42 | 1311588 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

you know it's real "when they think it's a set up."  I actually had to apologize to myself for thinking he might have been innocent.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:11 | 1311266 Trillax
Trillax's picture

With that cinema setup, the porn should feel real life. Perhaps some maid-inspired titles?

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:15 | 1311283 JustACitizen
JustACitizen's picture

How would you like to be the housekeeper? I don't think all of those gleaming surfaces are maintained by the little woman... Maybe as a political wife she was just relieved that he was getting his jollies elsewhere...

Or, maybe MrsDSK hired someone named "Edgar" to handle it though...

Ah to be obscenely wealthy and oh so continental...

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:20 | 1311292 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Munch munch munch...

"Damn it sure is good to be married to a billionairess, who will do everything in her power from preventing her husband's improprieties from spilling over into her own social scene."

LOL!!!...cough...hack...gag...a kept man bitchez!!! ;-)


Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:20 | 1311297 redarrow
redarrow's picture

Relax, its really not worth the 14 million. Not to come off like a complete ass here but there are nicer places to be had for that kind of money.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:30 | 1311340 wretch
wretch's picture

You came off like a complete ass there.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:40 | 1311379 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

Yep, Greece is selling the island of Lesbos for 12 million.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:03 | 1311447 Sophist Economicus
Sophist Economicus's picture

Great idea -- sic him on the Lesbos!

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:28 | 1311331 zaknick
zaknick's picture

DSK blamed Putin for the setup-Putin sec issued official denial. He's guarded by the same bunch who guarded Madoff -you dont entrust your sec to just anyone. Noticed that his Putin jab didn't get much airtime on the KKK MSM -same people he pissed off with his bancor talk.

Glenn Beck is pure Goebbelian evil. Amazing to see somthimg like that on TV. Interesting times.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:30 | 1311339 tom a taxpayer
tom a taxpayer's picture

Maybe DSK will suffer from being locked up 24/7 with his dumbass wife.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:31 | 1311348 I am a Man I am...
I am a Man I am Forty's picture

let her throw her money away on his rapin' cheatin' ass, the quicker it gets out of her hands the better we all are

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:36 | 1311364 gwar5
gwar5's picture

A naked, and wrinkly, DSK: "Don't you know who I am?"

Maid: "Er... Bill Clinton? ....Al Gore? .... (running) I know you can't be Teddy Kennedy so I give up!"

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:56 | 1311426 obelisks
obelisks's picture

Am i missing something ?  surely all of this is only temporary until the guilty verdict

and then back to the real world of orange jumpsuits ?

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 21:54 | 1311433 justtotaketheedgeoff
justtotaketheedgeoff's picture

Was that place designed to look like the interior of an airport on purpose?  Even the bathroom looks like an airport restroom. Oh well, I'm not an urban sophisticate so I don't know much about this stuff.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:04 | 1311450 ThisIsBob
ThisIsBob's picture

Can we get a couple of shots of the maid's quarters?

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:02 | 1311455 alien-IQ
alien-IQ's picture

That has got to be the swankest "prison" (holding cell?) in history. Pablo Escobar would be jealous.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:06 | 1311470 PulauHantu29
PulauHantu29's picture

Sweet Deal.....nice to be Mega-Rich.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 08:32 | 1311507 web bot
web bot's picture


Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:22 | 1311519 Debtless
Debtless's picture

This kind of coin and the rat has to chase maid cheese?

I cannot wait until these robbers are hung.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:34 | 1311559 Careless Whisper
Careless Whisper's picture

leave the guy alone. he's really good for the nyc economy.


Wed, 05/25/2011 - 23:16 | 1311717 nonclaim
nonclaim's picture

Thinking about it, you are right... from the maid to the lawyers, real state agent, cabs, flight ticket from wife and what not, and likely a huge "punitive" fine and a lot of money for the settlement the guy is really moving the local economy.

Every city needing money should prepare a set up and invite him for a quick(y) visit. /sarc

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 23:37 | 1311802 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

rrrooowwww!  got claws, too? (sarcasm ON baby, ON!)

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:37 | 1311564 Baptiste Say
Baptiste Say's picture

This is a guy who early on was a member of France's communist party and since 1970 of their socialist party.


Despite this he is a billionaire and throws away money on $3000 per night hotels and $15 million apartments like it's nothing. Amazing.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 04:15 | 1312272 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture

he isn't exactly a billionaire.  he is married to one, works for others.  the hotel was a business expense and the apartment his wife's.  

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:37 | 1311569 GottaBKiddn
GottaBKiddn's picture


He's a maid man.

With a little HIV problem, though.



Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:39 | 1311590 tao400
tao400's picture

Someone got a nice commissh.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:40 | 1311594 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

Come on, admit it.  "We all want a wife like that, though."

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:57 | 1311636 Cthonic
Cthonic's picture

Some would settle for servicing someone's wife like that.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 23:39 | 1311814 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

actually i was thinking more along the lines of "she buys me a huge house after i'm accused of doing something VERY illegal.  Involving another women no less!  But i'm with ya' man. 

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:51 | 1311613 Element
Element's picture

Austerity bitchez!

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:54 | 1311625 Cthonic
Cthonic's picture

Yeah, he'll definitely have to cough up for some blinds.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 04:18 | 1312277 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture

indeed.  the universal recommendation of the banks: cut wages/social services/pensions/currency exchange rates but keep paying our vigorish makes a nice counterpoint to the unfolding dsk story.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:56 | 1311634 f16hoser
f16hoser's picture

Damn, crime does pay!

However, I feel he was set-up. I don't like him, but I feel the powers behind the throne knew his weakness and exploited it. Still, nice dig's, Fucker!

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 01:05 | 1312050 Dr Zaius
Dr Zaius's picture

A set-up?  Nice trick getting his DNA samples all over the maid and the room.  I think the whole thing comes down to the maids manager.  If the manager were more politically astute, this whole thing would have been quitely swept under the rug and never to be spoken of.

Wed, 05/25/2011 - 22:53 | 1311635 f16hoser
f16hoser's picture

Damn, crime does pay!

However, I feel he was set-up. I don't like him, but I feel the powers behind the throne knew his weakness and exploited it. Still, nice dig's, Fucker!

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 00:00 | 1311897 lolmaster
lolmaster's picture

How did her daddy get rich? Let me guess ketchup?

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 00:01 | 1311905 Clowns on Acid
Clowns on Acid's picture

Some thoughts..

Place is so big they will definitely need at least 2 maids. They will probably be Irish though.  

So that means that there is $14.5MM less that Greece, Portugal, or..Zimbabwe gets?


Thu, 05/26/2011 - 00:40 | 1311994 Sizzurp
Sizzurp's picture

Seems like he could have paid the maid to have a change of heart for a lot less than the price of this humble abode.  Actually I am surprised she hasn't found a new residence on St Barts by now, followed by failing to appear for her testimony.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 00:51 | 1312018 ToNYC
ToNYC's picture


Flashing through these comments  is the distinct absence of feeling that the vast majority don't express their willingness to immediately swap their miserable lives for his ...just don't get near the pretty girl leg trap.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 04:22 | 1312280 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture

too many negatives for clarity.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 00:56 | 1312031 AldoHux_IV
AldoHux_IV's picture

Just goes to show justice is blind unless you have the money to take the blindfold off and fuck it. What a fucking sham-- and a disgusting turn of events-- if he doesn't (and this goes to all his kind out there that currently operate behind these failed institutions) get justice here, they will get justice at somepoint for their crimes against humanity.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 03:54 | 1312259 Fat Ass
Fat Ass's picture

You are completely correct.  It is just a joke.  What a joke.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 04:23 | 1312281 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture

justice is based on who you are not what you did, all too frequently.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 01:02 | 1312045 lucasjackson
lucasjackson's picture

His wife may be facing some legal troubles of her own.  During the course of their investigation they searched her home in Paris and discovered substances illegal in France:  mouthwash, deoderant and shampoo.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 02:32 | 1312193 Tense INDIAN
Tense INDIAN's picture

so much for a communist....wheres the equality here??

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 03:15 | 1312231 anonnn
anonnn's picture

Noteworthy... DSK picked-on a unionized housekeeper. His IMF is a union-strangler in its "austerity" enslavment remedies to preserve oligarchs.

ServiceEmployeesInternationalUnion [SEIU] reps housekeepers at Sofitel and is contracturally bound to support and handle outrages against its members.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 04:05 | 1312267 splattered
splattered's picture

Sarcozy is America's first French Puppet - DSK was set up by the USA coz they were scared he'd beat Sarcozy in the elections - don't you lot get it?

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 16:36 | 1314292 ToNYC
ToNYC's picture


Exactly . Lagarde's big head posse smacked USA's DSK.

Rudy and Bernie come to mind into the global space launched by the towers fall...and go.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 04:53 | 1312306 e-recep
e-recep's picture

All he had to do was to quit his job at the IMF. Now he can keep on living like he used to. :)

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 05:05 | 1312310 winandgo
winandgo's picture

I'm missing the helicopter landing place!

Or is it just next door?

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 05:26 | 1312316 Chestire
Chestire's picture

First the German hooking the Dutch for right-wing election victory; now the French hooking the Belgian for Socialist Government (oops, somebody just lost a Presidential candidate)... and Franklin St., glad I didn't move in... But somebody moved out, oh yes she did.


Quite frankly, the corrupted French regime is visible in President Sarkozy's iterations. French corporate culture does rink of affairs with hidden objectives. I've had enough of that. But perhaps there is no other way of getting laid so would you so kindly send a good American my way? Thank you.

Thu, 05/26/2011 - 05:45 | 1312327 vocational tainee
vocational tainee's picture

The design of the house is a bit small minded !

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