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Previewing Goldman: The Movie

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Ric Burns documentary about Goldman Sachs is imminent. Because as the WSJ revealed previously, the fact that Ric Burns is paid
by Goldman Sachs to make a film about the discount window backed hegde
fund, in which Goldman Sachs maintains complete editorial control, sure
seems like yet another PR fiasco waiting to happen, on par with Goldman
making money every single trading day in Q1 (at least they learned
their lesson there, and theatrically let a few losses slip in). Just like you, we can't wait for the final product to finally boost our opinion of the fixed income OTC market monopolist. In the meantime, we present this appetizer as to what the final video will most likely be, courtesy of Minyanville.

 

 

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Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:20 | 511405 RobotTrader
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No doubt, the Goldman Prop Desk traders have been consuming massive amounts of Monster Energy.....

Getting ready for tomorrow's "Flash Crash" FOMC melee....

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:38 | 511431 rapunzel
rapunzel's picture

damn R O B O, i just got so busted by two men, looking at this shit condo's sprinkler system. eye  B A L L s to eyeballs to nipples nakedness, panties on, TG, with kimono open. the younger kid was laughing, the older man

S M I L E D BIG, at least. i am dying here, of laughter.

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:40 | 511441 downrodeo
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#$%king puritanical americans, don't let them give you any crap...

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 18:01 | 511540 AccreditedEYE
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Even with the new avatar, you still scare me Velobabe....

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 19:52 | 511554 rapunzel
rapunzel's picture

bondage toooooooo.

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:22 | 511406 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

Sounds like the "Rocky Horror Picture Show"

could become a real cult item... in the proper hands

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 17:20 | 511484 John Self
John Self's picture

Repo Madness....

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:26 | 511418 unwashedmass
unwashedmass's picture

 

interesting thought about tomorrow. obviously they are going to try and stage a rally, but the peasants aren't going to show up. what then?

we are in the last round of musical chairs......question now is, who is going to get stuck holding......now that the peasantry is not around to the usual patsies?

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:26 | 511419 unwashedmass
unwashedmass's picture

 

interesting thought about tomorrow. obviously they are going to try and stage a rally, but the peasants aren't going to show up. what then?

we are in the last round of musical chairs......question now is, who is going to get stuck holding......now that the peasantry is not around to the usual patsies?

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:25 | 511421 Oracle of Kypseli
Oracle of Kypseli's picture

Modern day Ziggurat effrontery.

In your face pleabes.

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:30 | 511424 TimmyP
TimmyP's picture

Moved to tears...  This is such a wonderful piece of art that will last throughout the years!

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:45 | 511453 Internet Tough Guy
Internet Tough Guy's picture

A film for the whole family, because your children will be paying for it forever. And paying, and paying...

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 18:07 | 511551 knukles
knukles's picture

Fuck me....  eligible for future book burinings?

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:34 | 511428 truont
truont's picture

Will all you ZH haters just leave Goldman alone!  Leave them alone!

They are doing God's work, you see.

What are you doing, worthless eaters?

Whatever it is, it is not as cool as doing God's work, so y'all shaddup.

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:36 | 511435 jeb3
jeb3's picture

Well, Matt Simmons is dead.  Guess his "heart attack" marks the end to all of our Gulf problems.  Now that nobody from the industry has anything critical to say everything must be fixed down there.... right?

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:41 | 511437 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Classic with the civil war theme and black and white photos. Leave it to Minyanville to produce some brilliant satire.

Of course the movie itself will be "official" company propaganda. From the WSJ article. Looks like Burns was tired of making peanuts working on PBS documentaries and heard the cash register ring.

Given the company's starring role in the financial crisis, some filmmakers are skeptical about Mr. Burns's movie. "It is very unusual for a documentary maker of his stature to take on a project like this, and especially one with strings attached," said Robert Greenwald, whose 2005 documentary, "Wal-Mart: The High Cost of Low Price," cast an unflattering look at the retailer. "It goes against everything we fight for as documentary makers."

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 17:02 | 511470 ZeroPower
ZeroPower's picture

Agreed.

Also, Food Inc is another great one to watch, im sure the hardcore pessimists 'nuclear war is coming' types can agree as well.

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 17:37 | 511490 rapunzel
rapunzel's picture

Looks like Burns was tired of making peanuts working on PBS documentaries and heard the cash register ring.

totally agree with you cogpis-y. he has sold out last couple of years. specially his latest on national forests and parks. sickening really, no one left with any integrity, none, just you babe.

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:39 | 511439 Internet Tough Guy
Internet Tough Guy's picture

Leni Riefenstahl, bitches.

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 17:33 | 511496 rapunzel
rapunzel's picture

thanks  B I G    G U Y

extreme interest, in that B I T C H‡

she probably would not want to document a film about GS, just sayin.

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:48 | 511452 Salinger
Salinger's picture

 I think this was left on the cutting floor

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jn0tMMYEkQU

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:48 | 511459 realtick
realtick's picture

"I don’t know where the stock market is going [bullshit], but I will say this, that if it continues higher, this will do more to stimulate the economy than anything we’ve been talking about today or anything anybody else was talking about."

Translation: get long.

http://seekingalpha.com/article/218017-greenspan-new-stock-market-bubble...

 

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 16:50 | 511460 realtick
Mon, 08/09/2010 - 17:11 | 511481 Downtoolong
Downtoolong's picture

Goldman Sachs, the movie, where can I short the critics reviews.

 

The documentary is definitely going to show Goldman doing Gods work. Furthermore, it’s going to prove once and for all that Goldman charges God a reasonable fee for it, and that they have never once tried to front-run or position themselves against God in the markets.

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 17:39 | 511508 Oracle of Kypseli
Oracle of Kypseli's picture

Well, here is how Goldman pays fees to their god. (Tip from an insider.)

Every night they throw cash up in the air and tell god to keep as much as he/she deems appropriate. Whatever falls down they put back in the safe.

 

 

  

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 17:49 | 511519 Lord Welligton
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:)

 

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 17:41 | 511511 Shameful
Shameful's picture

I can't wait!  I need a scene where God reaches an outstretched hand to Lloyd, kinda like this http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:God2-Sistine_Chapel.png

Really hoping for it to be so saccharinely sweet to be unbearable.  Maybe have the prop desk shown helping the underage kids.  You know a scene where they take an underage inner city youth and show him how to front run their clients.

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 17:42 | 511513 Crummy
Crummy's picture

I'm actually looking forward to this.

You hear all about it but it's not very often you actually get to watch the winners write history.

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 19:46 | 511672 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

you have to get a leak since it is planned for only internal viewing

Tue, 08/10/2010 - 01:56 | 512074 Crummy
Crummy's picture

Who says I have to get a leak?

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 18:02 | 511544 AccreditedEYE
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I think I'm going to be sick.

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 18:07 | 511548 knukles
knukles's picture

Bullshit.  T'will be bullshit, I say.  Bullshit.

Wonder if there'll be any guest cameos from The Hill?

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 18:48 | 511607 dantes1807
dantes1807's picture

With Goldman Sachs trading record being down lately, perhaps they are purposely losing a few rounds to appear mortal. Perhaps they let HFT run in the other direction.

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 19:35 | 511658 stickyfingers
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Starring Julia Roberts, "Devour, Prey, Screw."

Coming to a theatre near you.

Mon, 08/09/2010 - 20:17 | 511704 optimator
optimator's picture

Will the movie get subtitles when played overseas?  Sometimes there are errors in the translation, for example:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WfvIstgOugc

Tue, 08/10/2010 - 05:40 | 512160 Paper CRUSHer
Paper CRUSHer's picture

My......my.......my........you one.....'UGLY MUTHA SUCKER'

 

Tue, 08/10/2010 - 02:53 | 512097 Moonrajah
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Well, it could have been worse - they could have asked Tom Cruise to star in it.

Tue, 08/10/2010 - 04:52 | 512131 Hunch Trader
Hunch Trader's picture

Youtube link in case that doesn't load, or even makes your browser crash

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oNB2lvsEzfo

 

Tue, 08/10/2010 - 13:18 | 512906 jmc8888
jmc8888's picture

ROFL I love the history channel or pbs or whatever civil war format of it. ha ha

To my dear Tessie,

It's hard on the front lines, the smell, the danger.  We never do know what will come at us next.  I heard someone say they don't expect to last long, and that they could be dead any day now.  He said, 'How can I fight the enemy when I never lay my eyes on him, he just gets up and strikes and the effect of morale on the troops fighting them withers away'.   I wish I could imagine the end ahead, but ne'er do I see a light at the end of the tunnel, nor smell the sweet smell of victory.  All I smell is defeat, and I reckon I better get used to it because that smell will never change.

The sardines you sent me helped, it allowed me to catch the stink of the other Banksters ripping everything not nailed down on Wall Street and across America.  Gold is the enemy, and I cannot defeat him.  I have failed.

Your Dearest,

Moriarty Abagnail Whatever irish sounding surname, NYSE Floor Trader August 2010

 

Tue, 08/10/2010 - 16:36 | 513520 Client 9
Client 9's picture

Let it go already Daniel I!  So they fired you!  So you are banned for insider trading.  Move on!

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