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As Previously Disclosed, Sheila Bair Is Leaving The FDIC

Tyler Durden's picture




 

FDIC ANNOUNCES CHAIRMAN BAIR’S OFFICIAL DEPARTURE DATE
2011-05-09 18:49:16.408 GMT

(The following is a reformatted version of a press release issued by The FDIC and received via electronic mail. The release was confirmed by the sender.)

FDIC Announces Chairman Bair’s Official Departure Date

May 9, 2011

The Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation (FDIC) today announced Chairman Sheila C. Bair’s official departure will be effective July 8th, 2011. Consistent with previous public statements, Chairman Bair has announced her intention to depart the agency following the expiration of her term as Chairman. The FDIC will hold a board meeting during the first week of July.

This will be Chairman Bair’s final board meeting.

Media Contact:
Andrew Gray
(202) 898-7192
Email: angray@fdic.gov

 

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Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:55 | 1256403 tmosley
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The chocolate ration has been raised from 30 grams to 20 grams.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:07 | 1256444 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

How much more has Goldman offered her?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:09 | 1256454 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

She got an offer from a german FKK club.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:31 | 1256565 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

"The FDIC can never ever run out of money," said Sheila Bair.

 

“Without these assessments, the deposit insurance fund could become insolvent this year,” said Sheila Bair.

The bitch knew how to cover all the bases.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:42 | 1256596 hedgeless_horseman
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Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:10 | 1256462 æther
æther's picture

Good reference. 

I had a prof that made us read that, along with Brave New World.  Essentially, BNW is a world where people are slaves to pleasure and consumption (sound like anywhere you know?).

Personally, I think we're on a path to harvest all the worst of the two and fuse them together into a super-misery.  Truth is [more painful] than fiction.

Sometimes you feel like the only person awake in a building on fire.  You try to wake the others to warn them and they laugh, give you the middle finger, and go back to sleep.  Strange how compassion for your fellow man is what ends up killing you through the pain of insanity. 

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:12 | 1256471 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

You should also read Atlas Shrugged.

That should fix your "compassion for your fellow man".

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:10 | 1256475 john39
john39's picture

in the old days, they would force medicate you, lock you up and give you a labotamy...  now they just ridicule you.    budget cuts I guess.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 20:19 | 1257501 lynnybee
lynnybee's picture

 " You try to wake the others to warn them and they laugh, give you the middle finger, and go back to sleep. "    ...... well, i agree.   

When I told my dinner companions that the United States of America was being taken over by a gang of off-shore criminal bankers, they laughed so hard that the whole restaurant was looking over at our table.   No one understands, I feel alone.

 

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 21:19 | 1257647 aerojet
aerojet's picture

I don't know why you are so concerned about everyone else.  You may be dead wrong, you know?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:08 | 1256466 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

Updated tomorrow:  The chocolate ration was always 20 grams.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:17 | 1256492 tmosley
tmosley's picture

Of course. Anyone who says otherwise is a conspiracy theorist.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:55 | 1256404 alexwest
alexwest's picture

Blair witch is gone.. nice

alx

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:56 | 1256408 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

We should throw her a party.

What should I wear?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:03 | 1256430 sabra1
sabra1's picture

the Bair minumum of course!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:07 | 1256446 Agent P
Agent P's picture

Boooooooooooooooooooo!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 22:22 | 1257810 Carl Spackler
Carl Spackler's picture

Special Agent P rocks !

"He is a Platypus...they don't do anything." 

 

In any event, Sheila Bair is such a "tool."  Good riddance.

 

 

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:58 | 1256409 Crummy
Crummy's picture

Yeah, but does she shit in the woods?

 

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:00 | 1256425 FunkyMonkeyBoy
FunkyMonkeyBoy's picture

No, she sh*ts in the Bernankes mouth at his request.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:01 | 1256419 Stupid Donkey
Stupid Donkey's picture

Will she start working at GS on July 9th?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:46 | 1256622 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

i'd go w/ jpmorgue, donk.  this is a comment from her charlie rose interview (oct, '08): 

It seems everyone here got sucked in on Ms Bair's coy little Miss proper act except one. This lady committed an unprecedented act of collusion with the OTS and JP Morgan Chase in the Wamu seizure and sale. She is a criminal of the worst type and it is a shame Charlie swallowed her little farce 'hook, line and sinker' and failed to ask the tough questions.

b-bye!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:01 | 1256420 MrPike
MrPike's picture

I wonder what cabinet position she will be appointed to.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:51 | 1256644 SoNH80
SoNH80's picture

Undersecretary for Faux Candor.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:01 | 1256423 Franken_Stein
Franken_Stein's picture

 

She wanted to leave before the shit hits the fan and there would be too many banks to save them all.

 

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:16 | 1256488 Archimedes
Archimedes's picture

You stole my post! I was going to say "When you have 983 problem banks" and a DIF that is negative, who would want the job!"

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 22:27 | 1257817 Carl Spackler
Carl Spackler's picture

B-I-N-G-O has been called. Please hold onto your cards.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:02 | 1256426 gordengeko
gordengeko's picture

Federally Disillusioned Insolvent Corporation.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:00 | 1256431 Urban Redneck
Urban Redneck's picture

What will she fuck up next?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:08 | 1256450 Hephasteus
Hephasteus's picture

The biggest holocaust in history. She'll be selling life insurance for a dollar as people line up for the gas chambers.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:01 | 1256437 sabra1
sabra1's picture

i heard the Bernanks twin brother is taking over! his name is Bernie!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:19 | 1256515 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

Good riddance.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:23 | 1256517 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

Hopefully the squid's (other) bitch at the sec will be next.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:27 | 1256553 SunBlaster
SunBlaster's picture

And we should care because?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:30 | 1256554 White.Star.Line
White.Star.Line's picture

Another Titanic VIP takes their place in the lifeboat.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:38 | 1256585 Dick Darlington
Dick Darlington's picture

Wonder how big her golden handshake will be...

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:44 | 1256608 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

from a '93 bloomie article, when she was head of the CFTC:  THE Commodity Futures Trading Commission (CFTC) has given the US$ 4.8 trillion derivatives market a clean bill of health, saying that fundamental changes in the way the market is regulated are not needed. ... "We have a strong affinity for derivatives at this agency," said acting CFTC chairman Sheila Bair. "We like them."

b-bye!



Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:45 | 1256611 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

She was a whore anyways.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:45 | 1256619 OceanTide
OceanTide's picture

I got 99 problems, but a Blair ain't one.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 16:21 | 1256738 Sausagemaker
Sausagemaker's picture

+99      Rhyme Pays!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:46 | 1256621 SoNH80
SoNH80's picture

Heckuva job, Sheila!  Your pre-2008 bank examinations were as fanciful as your P.R. flackery. 

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 16:09 | 1256710 sellstop
sellstop's picture

Early word from the top is that Brooksley Bourne to be Sheila's replacement.

gh

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 16:24 | 1256744 colonial
colonial's picture

leaving washington...probably for some over-paid job in the ivy league...can you imagine someone like sheila who wants to leave washington? 

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 16:39 | 1256824 Bartanist
Bartanist's picture

A. who will be Jamie Dimon's new love slave?

B. Any chance Sheila will end up at JPM?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 16:57 | 1256881 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

sheila does lloyd, jamie, and vik in the board room.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 18:04 | 1257137 wisefool
wisefool's picture

Sucks for me. My dream was for WB7 to do a 3's company spoof, but all my favorites are leaving.

Jack=Ben B..... Just fix it! You are the man of the house.

Janet=Sheila B...... "print the money Jack! I have a good reason for you to do it."

Chrissy = Christina Romer... "Print the money Jack, I have a different reason, it is just as good, but you would not understand it, so just print the money"

Larry Dallas = (Dimon/Blankefeild/Mozillo/Frank/Pandit/Blythe) ....... Well jack, you should probably print the money, but tell me exactly how you are going to do it so I can try to help you out.......

Furley = Timmy. ....... Jack, something is not right here. I am not sure how you plan to fix it, and or cover up for it, but all this nonsense needs to stop, even if that means printing the money.

 

 

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 18:55 | 1257272 Dirt Rat
Dirt Rat's picture

I always imagined a corny TV show called "The Dukes of Moral Hazard" with Sheila running around in a halter top and the Daisy Dukes.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 19:41 | 1257408 wisefool
wisefool's picture

+1 thats better than mine. I was just trying to get the stare decisis from the formal (english) sitcom "man of the house" as translated to the american sitcom 3s company/hamilton/federal reserve.

But you are bringing the whole redneck (scottish/irish) lineage to the equation. Bootlegging, Irish, JFK, hot chicks (not sheila) but you get my point.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 18:49 | 1257249 johnnymustardseed
johnnymustardseed's picture

ICEBERG DEAD AHEAD!!!! ALL WOMEN AND CHILDREN TO THE LIFE BOATS!!!!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 21:14 | 1257625 White.Star.Line
White.Star.Line's picture

Johnny, just to make a minor correction -

"All first-class women and children to the lifeboats.

All others, especially the hard-to-manage Irish, please stay confined to your lower quarters..."

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 19:25 | 1257350 faustian bargain
faustian bargain's picture

So then...a thousand bank failures to be announced on Friday evening July 8th?

Tue, 05/10/2011 - 00:56 | 1258150 BlackholeDivestment
BlackholeDivestment's picture

I thought she exited stage left already. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bi0r022-TxU

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