Qatar's Largest Investment Bank Discusses American Monetary Diarrhea

Tyler Durden's picture

When a major investment bank's offical Private Client presentation has such words as "Monetary Diarrhea" you know someone is in on the joke and hasn't been acquired by General Electric just yet. Nothing earth shattering here, just a good, simplified summation of how the US economy is suffering from a terminal case of Montezuma's revenge (also known as Traveller's Diarrhea, or TD - no relation to this particular author), and will be for a long long time. Also, yet another great Great Depression-Now overlay:

Full presentation from QInvest (Qatar's Largest Investment Bank) Private Client Advisory Commentary here.



h/t Bankster

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lizzy36's picture

bidetesque, montezuma's revenge....

market @ 11 ms month highs, and are full of fitting metaphors.

djchill2's picture

Fuckin' awesome!  Monetary guys think that phase has been trademarked yet?  Put that on a ZH shirt!  I' m buying!

ED's picture

Buy the set...

"Too Big To Fail"

"Too Screwed To Care"


agrotera's picture

thank you for the perspective...the diarrhea metaphor is really a euphemism.

Anonymous's picture

just flush your monetary diarrhea down the monetary bidet....

talk about contempt for brother ben's travelling economic salvation show....pack up the bankers and grab the old regulators cause everyone knows about brother bailout's show....reach out your hand...


Miles Kendig's picture

I am reminded one again that there is no such thing as coincidence.

Anonymous's picture

No offense, but middle east oil money is among the dumbest money around isn't it? If even they recognize the diarhea the gig is up, one would thing.

Anonymous's picture

foreigners are not buying our bonds....the
fed is buying them from accounts in the caymen

the chinese, europeans, arabs are NOT buying
our bonds...

Anonymous's picture

This is a repost of a comment I posted in another thread.

The recession does not need to be over. The public just needs to "Think" the recession is over. And the public will think the recession is over when the indicators that the public relies on for information shows that the recession is over.

The public watches the DOW Jones Industrial average.
The public watches the S&P 500.
The public watches the NASDAQ.
The public watches the price of oil.

The public does NOT watch the dollar, or the baltic dry, or the carry trade, or bond rates, or M1, or M2, or MZM, or anything else that needs more than 3 seconds to figure out.

Please understand, the traders in GS and JPM and the rest of Wall Street are not stupid. (Greedy, lying, thieves that would pimp their mothers for a buck, but not stupid.) And please understand that they read web pages, or have someone else read web pages, and give them the results. Well, when main stream media web comments are talking about lining up big bank traders and Wall Street insiders and hanging them along each side of Wall Street, there is a problem. (Look for comments from April through Juneish on Yahoo, MSN, CNBC,NY Times, etc.) Also understand that it is VERY hard to spend your stolen trillions when you are hanging by the neck from a lamp post 10 feet from the ground and the crows have pecked out your eyes.

We were || that close to a revolution, and for the first time in a generation the first people up against the wall would not have been the lawyers or politians, but instead would have been the bankers.

So yes, the bankers will push up the DJ, and S&P, and NASDAQ, and Oil. They wont care how they do it, because the public does not care how they do it. The public just needs the perception that things are better.

They will do this by placing out of favor mainstream stocks (BAC, C, FNM, FRM, CAR, etc) on a rocket and shooting them up, and when those stocks are at a comfortable level, they will SLOWLY sell off their position as the public, pension funds, mutual funds, and 401ks buy into the higher level.

The reason they will keep it slow is that if they sell off too fast, the market will crash, and bankers will then die. But if they pull out slowly, they both get to keep more gains on their scheme, and individual stocks that fall ~1% a day do not make the news.

At this point, it is about survival for the bankers. They have the profit, now they just need to be able to keep it and spend it. Please keep this in mind when thinking about trading or shorting the market.

clotario's picture

So true, but 'the public' watches their prospects most of all.  And 'the public' (as well as the bankers approving their loans) has started to do rudimentary math.


The administration is hoping they can Confidence their way out of this hole, but with individual and corporate balance sheets the way they are it ain't gonna be that easy.

Anonymous's picture

It doesn't matter what the DOW/S&P/Oil is at.. if the "public" cannot pay for food because they are that far in debt then this country has a problem. Foreclosures and insolvency with continue to climb until the proverbial straw breaks the proverbial camel's back..

Marley's picture

Until the philosophy which hold one race superior
And another
Is finally
And permanently
And abandoned -
Everywhere is war -
Me say war.

That until there no longer
First class and second class citizens of any nation
Until the colour of a mans skin
Is of no more significance than the colour of his eyes -
Me say war.

That until the basic human rights
Are equally guaranteed to all,
Without regard to race -
Dis a war.

That until that day
The dream of lasting peace,
World citizenship
Rule of international morality
Will remain in but a fleeting illusion to be pursued,
But never attained -
Now everywhere is war - war.

And until the ignoble and unhappy regimes
That hold our brothers in angola,
In mozambique,
South africa
Sub-human bondage
Have been toppled,
Utterly destroyed -
Well, everywhere is war -
Me say war.

War in the east,
War in the west,
War up north,
War down south -
War - war -
Rumours of war.
And until that day,
The african continent
Will not know peace,
We africans will fight - we find it necessary -
And we know we shall win
As we are confident
In the victory

Of good over evil -
Good over evil, yeah!
Good over evil -
Good over evil, yeah!
Good over evil -
Good over evil, yeah!

Anonymous's picture

a bit off topic but never entirely so when exposing fraud and criminality of ben bernanke i have just read chapman's report that ben is buying bonds offshore in the caymen islands...he was reporting the findings of rob kirby and ellen brown...

somehow this ties into the cia operation of which madoff was a part and relates to the 134b usd bond brouhaha with madoff taking money to israel and the caribbean - most likely caymens...

hence it seems that ben, cia, madoff, israel have been conspiring to prop up bonds probably in exchange for jets and an attack on syria....yes syria - not iran...not sure how it all fits together but i know there are connections....

the europeans and chicoms have not been buying bonds although they may have been converting mbs diarrhea into t-bond diarrhea...however, they have not been net buyers...

and so diarrhea has a place to go and it is not necessarily the bidet...its outcome will be more economic collapse and inflation....yes good old fashioned inflation...

ghostup's picture

Can someone refer me to a chart that shows monetary base overlaid with some measure of total outstanding credit?  The reason that this astronomical rise in the monetary base won't cause inflation is the corresponding shrinkage of credit, no?

Anonymous's picture

not quite....although there is an element of truth

the main reason why the large rise in monetary
base has not been price inflationary so far has
been because it includes about 800b usd deposited
at the fed by the banks receiving bailout money....

banks simply are not loaning the money which means
that the fractional expansion power is inert
to a point.

on the other hand, credit has been contracting
but not at nearly the same rate at which the
money base has expanded...thus production is
declining...hold on to that thought....

however, credit sensitive markets such as
real estate are seeing declines in price levels
but much of that is due to defaults from
lost income or income which never existed
as per ninja loans....and yet this is only a
sliver of the story....the supply of housing is

even so, a lot of money has leaked into the
economy from the fed via qe - it typically
takes 12-18 months for price inflation to
show up once monetary inflation has begun....the
data is starting to show significant cpi

so increasing money supply will eventually
enter the productive economy which has been
shrinking with a strong upward push on prices...

lookma's picture

Or maybe we'll have inflation because of a currency crisis.  Credit keeps contracting and the FED keeps printing until foreign makets yell uncle on the dollar.  Or maybe the US will step in first and formally devalue the dollar.

Anonymous's picture


Anonymous's picture

A pity Bernanke, the professed scholar of the Great Depression, hasn't learnt from history. We all have to suffer as a result. Just incredible!!

Careless Whisper's picture

Barclays ("former" employees) sets up a company called Protium Finance (I love that name) and loans it $12.6 Billion so it can buy $12.3 Billion worth of toxic assets from Barclays. No need to write down those assets -- they don't own them anymore. BRILLIANT.

Trading Nymph's picture

Wonder how many others did the samething? Well, besides the USA and bond buying...ouch.

McLuvin's picture

You've heard of the RACERs at Lehman, now Goldman has created a new vehicle for Middle Eastern sovereign wealth funds known as ASSETs:  Anally Secreted Securities for Eastern Targets.

Anonymous's picture

Line'em Up...Next

Anonymous's picture

Research - the Qatar / Tony Blair / Barclays links

Anonymous's picture

we love this one:

"This event of Generations X & Y seeing their Baby Boomer parents & grandparents go back to work will have a profound effect on the US Consumer's Psyche for years to come."

maybe Kevin's comment not so random nonsense?

fool us once, shame on yous.

I need more cowbell's picture

Diarrhea: an explosive discharge of liquid waste. Yeah, sound about right.

putbuyer's picture

My bowels have never been the same after seeing

those rusty ship pictures yesterday - now this!

I'm in trouble.

madmax's picture

From Bloomberg: China’s Pig Farmers Amass Copper, Nickel, Sucden Says

Pig farmers and other speculators may have amassed more than 50,000 metric tons, Jeremy Goldwyn, who oversees business development in Asia for London-based Sucden, wrote in an e- mailed report after a visit to China. That’s about half the level of inventories tallied by the Shanghai Futures Exchange, which stood last week at a two-year high of 97,396 tons.


Just when you thought things could not get any more absurd!

I guess I should stock pile FCX on the back of this news.