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Raj's World
Anyone read Monday's WSJ about the myriad networking methods used by Raj to extract inside information? Funny how enormous amounts of money, effort, and time was used to "get an edge" in order to squeak out a paltry $70 million or so in a $7 billion hedge fund. He should have used his energy elsewhere, as in hiring a horde of Playstation gamers and Victoria's Secret models instead.
I mean, it was really silly how he constructed an elaborate network of contacts to obtain useful information about mergers, earnings, etc.
But really, was it worth the effort? Imagine the armtwisting. The bribing. The annoying phone calls requesting information. The constant networking. The badgering and cajoling. The fake smiling. The incessant back slapping and handshaking. So much time wasted on social events, weddings, birthday parties, barbeques, etc. All that money wasted paying for someone else's hookers, escorts, massage girls, bottles of wine and champagne. What ever it took to get "plugged in" so somebody important might toss a bit of information your way.
Did anyone see the picture in the WSJ of Raj's trading desk? Must have seen at least 18 monitors. Not one monitor had a stock chart on it. Looked like it was all newsfeeds with earnings guestimates, whisper numbers, analyst numbers, etc. Looked more like a bunch of monitors found at Harvey Levin's office at TMZ.com.
What a colossal failure. Imagine running a $7 billion fund by gaming insider information and trying to guess who is going to "beat 'da numbah".
If this guy had any sense, he would have used all that time and money to hire huge teams of 19-year old pro gamers, assign them to trade just one stock based on price action and momentum alone.
Instead of working the Hamptons social circuit, he should have hired some washed up Victoria's Secret models to cruise around the trading floor in lingerie, handing out Subway sandwiches, Red Bull, and Monster Energy drinks to the traders.
And instead of spending $750,000/year on a "public relations" executive, he could have hired a few FemBots with megaphones, screaming at the traders "if its going up, buy it! If its going down, sell it!!".
All that was necessary for each trader was a simple workstation like this:
One monitor with a 15-minute chart.
One monitor with a 60-minute chart.
One monitor with a chart of the EUR/USD.
One monitor with a news feed that strictly monitors Fed Head pronouncements, G-7 communiques, and Central Banker pie-holing, and other assorted jawboning language out of various Treasury department officials.
Because that's the only news that matters. Because the EUR/USD runs all price action of virtually every instrument on Wall Street.
Gamers can sit there with their joysticks and simply buy or sell based on price action and momentum, all determined by "words" uttered by Politburo and monetary authorities.
Imagine the success Raj would have had if he would have had 100 of these workstations and a 100 gamers instead.
He could have come to work in a $75 Tommy Bahama shirt instead of a $2,800 Zegna suit.
He could have taken a 3 hour break each day to go to the gym with a personal trainer, and leave the FemBots in charge. Instead, he ballooned up to 300+ pounds because of mandatory and required eating and drinking at the astounding number of social networking events.
After hours, he could have enjoyed a quiet and relaxing Asian massage, instead of rushing in his limo to the next gala or fundraising.
Hey, life could have been much different in Raj's World.
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wow. Raj likes animime porn?
Deep Shah.
LoL
well, guess which article am I planning to mass mail today?
Well, guess which article am I planning to mass mail this Friday?
ROFL
Exactly, Robo. You know, ESPN's "Sports Guy" created the vaunted "Vice President of Common Sense": an average fan, essentially taken off the street who "would be called in to assess important transactions; his reaction would be a gauge to help the team notice obviously mediocre decisions arising from such problems as bureaucracy, group-think and hype." As you point out, however, in today's Bizzaro Markets, you need the exact opposite of this: someone who ONLY pays attention to "conventional wisdom" and what the herd is doing. Raj, anyone with a lick of common sense could have told you this.
this Asian chick looks like a tranny
i am very suspicious about you RoboT
Nah, here's a real tranny doing some tranny karaoke. I actually think the video is really good.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gKhjaGRhIYU
I've been a little suspicious of Robo ever since he posted Kathy Lee Gifford... not once but twice :-)
That monitor picture... is full of 4chan screens...
Robo I like your business model. Let's start a hedge fund.
ROBO / We appreciate your work, it's unique and entertaining. Here's a good story. We're a simple tight knit family who never forgot where we all came from. But, in line with your Raj story: Years ago (15-20), we were invited to the floor of CBOT as guests. Then, upstairs to meet some of "the boyz" (you know, those fresh out of Ivy League school hotshot "money managers & insiders" who would be trading our money). Then, lunch with the CEO (with all the pomp and circumstance that comes with this type nonsense). Anyway, they walk us around and show us their trading desks covered with all the up-to-minute high tech gadgets and monitors just like Raja. Then, at the end of this 4 hour circus, they get around to asking us for our money. My wife, a savvy broad, looks at them and flatly says "no" (you could hear a pin drop). Stunned, like no one has ever said no to them, they ask why not? She proceeds to tell them that the business of investing money is really pretty basic, and simple, and that if you're really good at what do - over the long term - you should be able to return 1% a month compounded without all this "stuff" as she termed it. MORAL: Folks that make matters more complex than necessary, are usually trying to overcompensate for their lack of real talent, insecurities, or inadequacies. In the end, Raj, like many on Wall Street, fall into this category. Keep it simple, work hard, be honest, and use common sense. If this guy was really talented at managing money - you're right - he wouldn't have to lie, cheat and steal to somehow succeed at it. Common sense is not common.
What?? Not a peep about the modest price action in AMZN. How bout the BIDU coattails with a demure $20 move. Jist lak da good ole dayz.
Mock all you want.
The SEC is going after fallguy #2 or #3?
"Inside" trading ROFMLOL.
SEC is desperate, Obozo is desperate (government regulated compensation).
All populist measures to distract and avoid the tough questions.
Like why do GS and the Fed have a backdoor into the WH and Sec. of Treasury?
Give us 700 bln $$ to continue the ponzi or the world will end.
GS uses the front door, they own the joint.
Whoever picked these stocks at the March lows....
Well, they probably ordered up the most expensive escort available for this weekend...
I bet she's a great swimmer...
You pretty much nailed it. Common sense is not common and we'd be long disclosure!
equal opportunity eye candy
she wolf
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bQxbPRDEg5I
he wolf
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0QNEZTzENU
Great post Robo!
4chan FTW. Who knew Raj was a /b/tard?
Raj should've invested in Nutrisystems, or perhaps liposuction. I've seen lots of connections made at the gym (and I don't mean the Homer Erotic kind). Heck, even N. Taleb hangs out there. More than likely, just a bunch of flash (and "jobs for the boys") rather than some overarching talent. Raj was probably known as an easy touch for a perk, so was used like a roll of Charmin. Same results too.
On another note, how come H. Paulson doesn't get in trouble for 100x this kind of behaviour?
Nutrisystems? The real deal would have been hooked up with that Komic that's in tight with the WH, no not Glenn Beck the other one
http://www.politico.com/click/stories/0910/cross_i_did_coke_at_whcd.html
What's up with all the teenage anime girls?
Maybe it wasn't the insider trading that got their attention?
Why is The Raj on 4chan?
lulwut?
error
When I saw that trading floor and what the man who stood amongst the screens must have once thought of himself, I could not help but think of Shelley's Ozymandias:
I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, a shatter'd visage lies, whose frown
And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamp'd on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed.
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare,
The lone and level sands stretch far away.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNhnThb8gEw
How about a $5 Casio calculator to compute what interest $7B will earn in a 2% CD.
PS the Phillipino boy doesn't do it man.
I believe that's a Thai she-boy. A mistake "anyone" could make after pounding a dozen Singhas while waiting for the rain to let up.
Watch for the movie "Who Framed Rajah Ratarabbit "