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Texas Teachers $109 Billion Pension Fund Needs A Whopping 21% Return In Current Year To Preserve Adequate Funding Ratio

Tyler Durden's picture


While the University of Texas made headlines over the weekend for disclosing it had taken delivery of $1 billion in gold (albeit in a Comex warehouse in New York), another Texas fund is making waves today however for all the wrong reasons. As Bloomberg announces, "The Teacher Retirement System of Texas needs an annual return of 21 percent in the year ending Aug. 31 to maintain an 80 percent funded ratio, the level actuaries consider adequate to cover liabilities, said its deputy director." Needless to say, as Brian Guthrie, the fund's executive director admitted, “We’d have to have remarkable investment returns for the rest of the year to reach 80 percent.” Considering that the fund’s investment return was 14.7% in 2010, the best among large public pension funds, it is more than obvious that a major portion of the fund's 109 billion in assets as of April 1 is already in stocks. Which is why should the market swoon following the end of QE1, the best performing fund of 2010 may well be the worst performing fund of 2011. And even if by some miracle stocks surge enough to fill the performance void for the rest of the year, it is still not guaranteed that the fund will make up for the performance shortfall, even as pensioners' capital is likely tied in with such bloated, overvalued garbage as 4x+ beta, triple digit forward earning multiple stocks (full list of key equity holdings below).

From Bloomberg:

Even with the gains, the pension’s funded ratio -- the portion of promised benefits covered by current assets -- dropped to 81.3 percent as of Feb. 28 from 82.9 percent on Aug. 31, 2010, because of trading losses in 2008 and 2009 included through a process called smoothing, Executive Director Ronnie Jung said April 7.

Public pensions nationwide are grappling with about $3.6 trillion in unfunded liabilities, according to a 2010 study by Joshua Rauh of Northwestern University and Robert Novy-Marx of the University of Rochester.

Texas Teachers’ annualized return for the decade ended Dec. 31 was 4.8 percent, below the fund’s assumption of an 8 percent annual return.

Texas legislators are considering reducing the state’s contribution to the fund, which is now 6.64 percent of employees’ salaries. The Texas House earlier this month passed a budget that would cut general revenue spending by $4.6 billion, or 5.2 percent, during the 2012-2013 biennium.

The pdf below shows the top 500 positions in the latest publicly disclosed stock holdings of Texas Teachers per Thompson One.

Texas Teachers -

h/t Mike


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Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:12 | 1186591 TheGoodDoctor
TheGoodDoctor's picture

Maybe they will talk to the folks from UT?

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:36 | 1186657 JPDG
JPDG's picture

Hell yes.  Put it all in physical silver.  You'll beat out 21% in no time. 

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:40 | 1186665 knukles
knukles's picture

Take physical and it's a self-fulfilling prophecy.  
Cruise missiles trump Kodak. 

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:00 | 1186704 Mark McGoldrick
Mark McGoldrick's picture

No.  That would be totally idiotic. 

Not to state the obvious, but you can't eat silver.  

So what does that mean?  Physically backed silver ETPs (funds and products) have gathered inflows of over 350 tonnes this year, swelling the total to over 15,500 tonnes. This ETP supply is just sitting there - unconsumed and unused - and accounts for over half of all demand for physical silver.

Demand for silver has been thoroughly distorted by these ETPs in the past year.  Unlike oil or corn or cotton or most other commodities, this silver isn't being consumed or used, so all that supply is just waiting to re-enter the market when demand corrects.  Then, you'll have a tsunami of supply which will absolutely crush the market. 

Anyone who wants to make a prediction on when it will happen is just lying. No one knows. Enjoy the ride while you can, because it will end - badly.


Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:19 | 1186749 Harlequin001
Harlequin001's picture

No Mark, but you can swap it for something you can eat, which is more than can be said for paper money which will not buy tomorrow what it will buy today.

Pension funds don't need to eat, they need to produce a store of wealth that pensioners can exchange for something to eat.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:22 | 1186761 Mark McGoldrick
Mark McGoldrick's picture

You missed the entire point of my post. 

The point is looming, latent supply - not edibility. 


Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:23 | 1186774 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

I gotcha and so does escape key and.peceptive to name a few.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 04:50 | 1187189 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

I what?? His post is a load of bollocks, silver IS being consumed by industrial processes. It doesn't just "sit there".

As for the inflow calculations, this would require either industrial use to have fallen off a cliff, or production to have increased significantly, either of which is questionnable at best.

Anyway, invest as you see fit.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 10:21 | 1187879 Mark McGoldrick
Mark McGoldrick's picture

silver IS being consumed by industrial processes. It doesn't just "sit there...

No shit, sherlock.  That's why I said, ETPs "account for over half of all demand for physical silver."  The other half is used for industrial purposes, however, the majority is, indeed, "just sitting there". 

You guys have severe reading comprehension issues. 

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:40 | 1186815 Harlequin001
Harlequin001's picture

'No. That would be totally idiotic. Not to state the obvious, but you can't eat silver. '

Hi Mark, not sure that I missed the point of your post at all.

The whole point of a pension fund is to preserve wealth, not provide food, for which silver is an ideal asset. You strike me as a person with an agenda. I have been advising many to invest in gold and silver since 2002. If we close out now we are doing find, better than these pension funds and much better than any stock market.

On what basis do you think that people are suddenly going to turn back to paper money at full face value? This can be the only basis of your claim for a route in silver prices is it not?

My understanding is that the looming latent supply is entirely inadequate to satisfy existing demand, never mind potential demand for a store of value even in these pension funds, never mind sovereign funds or even sovereigns as a new money

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 03:26 | 1187151 Michael
Michael's picture

I love the smell of complete and total economic collapse in the morning.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:28 | 1186788 Harlequin001
Harlequin001's picture

'Demand for silver has been thoroughly distorted by these ETFs in the past year.'

I agree, if you can get two people to buy the same thing at the same price then you have defeated price discovery. If you can get two or more investors to buy an ETF share instead of physical you have achieved the same result, which is precisely the function carried on by investment banks through short selling.

You can imagine the real price of silver if all the money that''s gone into ETF's, unallocated gold funds and derivatives had simply been invested in gold and silver bullion. No different to investors who think they are invested in wheat or corn when they are actually invested in the long side of a paper derivatives trade.

Massive price manipulation by any means. Should we be surprised that Singapore has just announced trading in cash settled gold and silver derivatives?

End badly? How can it end badly if it ends up where it started, in money? The tsunami of supply will be inadequate to fill the gaping void needed for a new global money...

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:30 | 1186973 Montgomery Burns
Montgomery Burns's picture

Bwaaaahahahaaaaaa! Buy silver. 1 billion chinese can't be wrong.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 08:00 | 1187441 Klaus Daimler
Klaus Daimler's picture

You seem to make the implicit assumption that SLV et al actually contain the physical silver that they claim to.  This assumption may not be valid and could result in a paper, not physical, supply tsunami, which is, one could argue, what we have now.  Silver seems to be bearing up pretty well under the pressure.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:04 | 1186721 Long-John-Silver
Long-John-Silver's picture

Obama will bail them out with our tax money.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:15 | 1186750 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

Not if they're in Texas....

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 08:35 | 1187541 Cash_is_Trash
Cash_is_Trash's picture

Like that interview this week where Obama tells the dude to let him finish his answers.

Eat shit Barry

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:55 | 1186996 CPL
CPL's picture

Built on nothing but a wish that it was paid.  Congrats to the TUT.  You were suckered in by your own trap.  Canada is next btw as much as Leo loves pushing his crippled ass on.  Leo makes more than a working Canuck blowing in a tube...but he does do that he's early stage.  Next time the fucker is on stage I'll intro him a woman that works the phones...and doesn't lose billions on investments....yet cause shes hy friend I spot her.


Doubt the greek has cash to find that friendly.


It ok Leo, I'm going to split with all my four kids and place parachutes for my friends (not the morons or rich ones).  It's time to leave Canada.  Don't hold a bag too long my spanky.  Since you are the same as a Lebanese kid, no sense in telling you that.  It's shit your own parent won't tell you.  What you think Canada will look like and what the Irish think it will look like are two different stories.


Hopeully boston keeps their boats above shore...I'm out of here weather the communists or the fascists win next election.  Does matter.  You should understand your life is over those tiny ponds to the south.  But since you have no clue, cousins or "honour" what does it matter that your cousin gets skunked.


To all canucks:  We piss, bitch and moan about how the world is unfair.  It isn't.  Got clubbed in a G20 meeting.  Guess what?  You're not dead because they believed you have something to say another day.

Want to change it.  Kill people.

Since you weren't killed the first time around, guess what?  You get to extend the benefits of NOT KILLING.


So...anyone have an idea other than a working one?

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 01:37 | 1187062 Bearish News
Bearish News's picture

Damnit, I came here to say basically the same thing... "Surely they're mega-long precious gold and silver, no worries".

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 02:47 | 1187128 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Face it teachers, do the math -- umm, you can do the math cain't ya??

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 09:46 | 1187755 Jay Gould Esq.
Jay Gould Esq.'s picture

Only 21% ? A simple solution: Put it all in Lululemon, like all hedge fund cognoscenti.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:12 | 1186592 tmosley
tmosley's picture

Damn.  They better buy some silver.  Not sure gold is going to cut it, unless they go all in.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:38 | 1186660 Montgomery Burns
Montgomery Burns's picture

AGQ  (2x silver)

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:43 | 1186850 tiger7905
tiger7905's picture

Latest from Charles Nenner, see's silver taking a break medium term.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 03:25 | 1187149 Popo
Popo's picture

When everyone believes something is going up (or down) is usually when max carnage happens.

...there are some serious neophyte investors around here that think silver 'always goes up'.

Here's a tip: there is no asset class for which that it true. Not one. None. Invest responsibly people....

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:12 | 1186593 paddy0761
paddy0761's picture

Better buy some gold then, eh?

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:13 | 1186595 High Plains Drifter
High Plains Drifter's picture

where is leo?  he knows everything....

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:14 | 1186929 UninterestedObserver
UninterestedObserver's picture

He was busy posting some crap article about the VIX 

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:17 | 1186603 High Plains Drifter
High Plains Drifter's picture,0,6962139.story

i don't know where to put this, so i guess it goes here. its just too damn funny in a sad sort of way. people fighting over jobs at macdonalds. is this what we are about now? good grief......

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:25 | 1186627 lynnybee
lynnybee's picture

yes, it's call the "race to the bottom" , courtesy of WALL ST. & WASHINGTON D.C. policy over the past 30 years.    drive down those wages, outsource 8,000,000 jobs (with more to come unless we go into revolution).    What the hell did they expect would happen !!  it was all planned & deliberate, we are expendable.   


Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:26 | 1186637 High Plains Drifter
High Plains Drifter's picture

i got out of the big city in 2006. i thought it would happen pretty fast. so far, nothing yet, but i think it is coming. not sure when though. i made some mistakes trying to put a date on it before so now, I just wait, but I know it is coming. The cities will burn.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:35 | 1186658 KickIce
KickIce's picture

Sans the bailouts you were pretty much on the money.  If I have learned anything out of this mess it is to never under estimate the ability of politicians to kick the can down the road.

Our economy/government is like a boulder supported by toothpicks.  When it goes it will do so quickly.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:44 | 1186670 knukles
knukles's picture

Blubber supported by us toothpicks?

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:51 | 1186691 KickIce
KickIce's picture

Or in Pelosi's case, botox.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:01 | 1186706 Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

Yup. That was the plan. And they got more than they wanted: deflation. So now their thinking is not "how do we restore the real economy", it's "how can we create artificial inflation to mask the deflation?"

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:18 | 1186609 tickhound
tickhound's picture



Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:20 | 1186617 johngaltfla
johngaltfla's picture

But don't worry, there is no municipal bond crisis coming.

The CNBC Infomercial Channel told me so.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:28 | 1186631 KickIce
KickIce's picture

Another reason for QE3, the state's unfunded liabilities will skyrocket without it, and why the unions are pumping DC for every dollar they can.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:25 | 1186633 duo
duo's picture

Why we need QE3.  Better a $10 loaf of bread than a pension shortfall.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:48 | 1186856 Freddie
Freddie's picture


You may need a wheelbarrow full of Obam notes for a loaf of bread soon.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:35 | 1186982 Slipmeanother
Slipmeanother's picture

they try and steal your wheelbarrow

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:29 | 1186639 PulauHantu29
PulauHantu29's picture

They NEED a 21% return....think of all the other funds that performed less stellar then UT's Teachers' Fund.....they will NEED an 80% return.

This is why a Whopper of a QE3 will be had to keep these funds from going Belly Up...imho.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:33 | 1186647 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

QE is guranteed then.  "Or not."  I still feel like "at best we're 50/50" no matter what given the simply "point blank" AWESOME logic of this argument.  That is why I prefer the "illogic of money."  Do i have to explain "what happens when you wave a red flag in front of bull?"  why?  "is the bull a slave because that's SUPPOSE to be a STOP SIGN?"  they say "he loses everytime."  i agree with that.  sometimes though "he kills that phucker with the red flag" and the crowd goes friggin WILD.  and then he "gets a cool pad in the Spanish country-side with all the hotties he wants--and even some he doesn't!"  and honestly--wouldn't you want that?  I mean "c'mon on over here Soledad O'brien and give this bull a little love."  Just SOUNDS cool, doesn't it?

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:15 | 1186936 cornedmutton
cornedmutton's picture

Puff, puff, pass.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:34 | 1186653 SilverRhino
SilverRhino's picture

21% yield?   Better buy some silver bitches.   ($44 (Ag current) / $29 (Ag 1/1/2011) = 51% YTD.  

Nothing else is even in the same ballpark.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:33 | 1186655 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

Greek two years are at 20%.  I agree "it shouldn't be that easy."

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:47 | 1186674 knukles
knukles's picture

Where's Harry when we need his recommendation?

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:06 | 1186722 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

I havent seen the real harry in a long time. He shouldnt be so sensitive. Come back harry wanger.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:05 | 1186898 knukles
knukles's picture

Now that's mean. 

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:35 | 1186656 Re-Discovery
Re-Discovery's picture


1) Secede and nationalize the Oil industry.

2) Sell UT to the penison fund for a $1 (i.e. steal their endowment.)

3) $25  tax on all guns in the state which pensioners themselves have to collect (certain actuarial benefits.)

4) Stop all public education (not really working anyway) and distribute fund corpus.

5) Buy silver.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 08:06 | 1187455 Klaus Daimler
Klaus Daimler's picture

certain actuarial benefits - LOL

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:44 | 1186668 Leo Kolivakis
Leo Kolivakis's picture

Big deal, this is more fear mongering. If their pension deficit widens, they will be forced to take measures to address it, just like Ontario Teachers' and others are doing.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:01 | 1186707 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

In the usa it is traditional to address such pension deficits by taking money from others who are not in the plan.

We taxpayers have plenty to fear monger about, especially.californians who will essentially see government services disappear to fund healthcare and retirement of government workers

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:03 | 1186713 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

I didnt junk you. I like hosers

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:32 | 1186799 Terminus C
Terminus C's picture

Hey! Take off eh!

Who are you callin a hoser eh?

Yer the hoser eh!

You hoser.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:34 | 1186813 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

I dont always respond but i always read and laugh at the funny.shit.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 09:51 | 1187787 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

Hey like, if we put a baby mouse in a bottle and feed it and let it grow so it's too big to get out the bottle, then we can take it to the brewery and get free beer and stuff, eh?

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 01:08 | 1187022 Freddie
Freddie's picture

Liberals in Calif voted to allow Mexico to take the state back and make CA taxpyers subsize the Reconquista.  Nice job.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:17 | 1186751 Re-Discovery
Re-Discovery's picture

Have you ever been to Texas?  The locals dont take kindly to government "taking measures."  They may be inclined to "take measures" of their own.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:16 | 1186941 UninterestedObserver
UninterestedObserver's picture

OK dick and do any of those measures not involve fucking the taxpayers?

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:40 | 1186988 Re-Discovery
Re-Discovery's picture

I think you may have misinterpreted my post (again, why are we paying these teachers?) 

I believe that if there is any "fucking" to be going on in this situation in Texas, the individual taxpayer likely will be doing it to their government.  Not the other way around.  Next time I'll use smaller words.


Wed, 04/20/2011 - 08:02 | 1187454 j0nx
j0nx's picture

Yeah yeah, meanwhile those same Texans are busy slurping beer and watching Kirstie Allie tap her hooves on Dancing with the stars. Uninvolved and apathetic are the only two words that come to mind when I think of Americans. Texans will sit back and take it in the pooper from government just like every other American in every other state has done for the past 3+ years since this shit started.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:45 | 1186673 Oligarchs Gone Wild
Oligarchs Gone Wild's picture

Welcome aboard TSTA (Texas State Teachers Association) Readers!  I'm sure your beloved teacher friends are all forwarding around this link.  Isn't cool to see that your fund is broke on the left hand, yet the most pressing matter at the top of your website on the right hand has you promising more f'ing money you don't have?  Neat!

From the TSTA website: 

April 19, 2011
TSTA supports bill to boost retirees’ annuity
The House Pensions, Investments, and Financial Services Committee on Tuesday considered several bills related to TRS and retirement benefits, including HB3542 by Larry Gonzales, which TSTA supports. This bill would allow the TRS Board to give retirees an increase in annuity that would be paid out of investment earnings with some restrictions.  For retirees’ to get this so-called 13th check, the fund would have to earn at least 8 percent on its return on investments and the fund could not go below an 80 percent threshold of being actuarially sound.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:50 | 1186680 knukles
knukles's picture

I gots me a hunch Gov. Perry gonna say sumptin' like "Nuh uh"

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:57 | 1186700 Oligarchs Gone Wild
Oligarchs Gone Wild's picture

Perry just told Obama to shove it after his $6B bailout throwdown today.

“We are a donor state," he said. "I would be happy if they send us back what we send up there. So, the idea that Texas is somehow not going to receive money back, now we don't want money that has strings attached to it.”

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:07 | 1186910 knukles
knukles's picture

LOL  Yessir, t'ween Perry and that inquisitive reporter, he got hisself a down right friendly Texas "Howdie!"

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 01:15 | 1187027 Freddie
Freddie's picture

Sadly "tough" Texans vote in "open-border" LBJ Republicans like Perry.   They talk a lot of "conservative" sh*t in Texas but most Texans are like LBJ.

Mexico has the Reconquista running in Texas like Calif.   Texas is just about 7 years behind CA.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 07:00 | 1187308 Ace Ventura
Ace Ventura's picture

Which is unfortunate, because if there's one state that is ideally positioned to pull of secession, its the Republic of Teyxus.

Won't happen as long as the average Texan continues to vote in establishment asshats like Dick Perry. How's that TTC working for ya, TX? What are the demographics like these days in the lone star state? Have they reached 50% mexican yet?

Meanwhile, real potential leaders like Debra Medina are viewed as 'loco'.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:51 | 1186684 Seasmoke
Seasmoke's picture

no way they could ever get 21%, without unreal risk taking putting more good money in danger and even if they could that means some other pension group out there somewhere wil probably be on the other end of the losing trade (no one ever mentions the win-lose)

the public employee pension ponzi scam is just about up.....i will gladly pay you tuesday for a hamburger today, has got them where they are today and the taxpayers aint paying no more , no matter how cheap those dollars get

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:02 | 1186710 Oligarchs Gone Wild
Oligarchs Gone Wild's picture

without unreal risk taking putting more good money in danger

LOL!  You mean like every f'ing pension fund in the US before 2008 managed by every TBTF banking cabal lackey going and being done AGAIN today during QE sploogefest 2k11?

Like the very example above...


Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:50 | 1186688 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

well, the Texas Teachers got "smoothed": 

Even with the gains, the pension’s funded ratio -- the portion of promised benefits covered by current assets -- dropped to 81.3 percent as of Feb. 28 from 82.9 percent on Aug. 31, 2010, because of trading losses in 2008 and 2009 included through a process called smoothing, Executive Director Ronnie Jung said April 7.  (my emphasis).

nice stable returns, too! 

i think gross & el-erian could have written this...

they may have gotten smoothed, too...

losses in '08 & '09?  well, at least we don't hafta worry about that any more!

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:09 | 1186733 Oligarchs Gone Wild
Oligarchs Gone Wild's picture

Smoothing?  Is that like Mark-to-clusterfuck accounting? 

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:59 | 1186695 SparkyvonBellagio
SparkyvonBellagio's picture

Raise a stink Texas. Make Wall Street pay!

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:56 | 1186699 SparkyvonBellagio
SparkyvonBellagio's picture

As a taxpayer, we should bail them out.

Better to bailout them, a group of Teachers, working hard, teaching the youth of their State, than the leveraged 3 card monty punks on Wall Street.


Texans should take it to Wall Street. Texas style Justice.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:18 | 1186945 UninterestedObserver
UninterestedObserver's picture

LOL fuck that and fuck wall street too - I PAY taxes, it is more than enough and if it isn't then fuck off.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 22:59 | 1186703 IdioTsincracY
IdioTsincracY's picture

Well ... isn't Texas supposed to secede the Union ... off they go ...

Talk is cheap ... please, gov. Perry, secede and show us the way it's done in Texas ....

....... I wonder, with all the tax cuts and benefits cuts down there ... how come they're in deep shit nonetheless?

Gotta love Reaganomics ... the BullSh!t always trickles down!!

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:04 | 1186717 Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

Nobody's gonna secede when they got an Uncle Sugar to pay off the un/under-employed. 

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:04 | 1186724 Oligarchs Gone Wild
Oligarchs Gone Wild's picture

What happened to all the folks (accidentally called refugees) who came up from NOLA to seek refuge in Texas?

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:07 | 1186729 Long-John-Silver
Long-John-Silver's picture

They will secede the moment DXY hits zero.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:10 | 1186737 Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

That's why they're storing up all that gold

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:31 | 1186775 Oligarchs Gone Wild
Oligarchs Gone Wild's picture

I don't know about anyone else, but the fact that Texas has all that gold up in vaults in NY just doesn't click. 

All I keep seeing in my head is "the day" arriving, and Texas realizes it's going to need to make a run to Yankee town to pick up it's rightfully owned goods by promising to it's keepers: residence, security and "fresh oracle" delivered daily in it's new gold backed upstart country.  A few thousand armed to the teeth "citizens" in a caravan heading north through the wasteland like a scene out of The Road or Book of Eli.  Loaded down with their own oil and their own weapons.   It's like a scene right out of a chapter from a James Kunstler book not yet written.

One thing is for certain.  Every day the probability of this becoming a reality is only going in one direction...

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:03 | 1186719 SilverRhino
SilverRhino's picture

Texas is paradise compred to the shitholes called the Rust Belt and the Northeast.

Give us time. We'll be glad to give the rest of the US the finger.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:13 | 1186738 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Lived in houston nine years and austin one.

Would gladly go back if i could.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:16 | 1186746 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

When Texas goes oklahoma up through n. dakota will want to go too.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:18 | 1186756 Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

If they secede, I secede. I'll turn my home in to a tax haven bank with numbered secret accounts

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:24 | 1186767 Re-Discovery
Re-Discovery's picture

Texas a paradise?  Now this provides reason enough to stiff the teachers altogether!  I mean, if this comment is representative, what do they really do?



Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:29 | 1186800 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Having lived in texas ten years i consider myself adopted.

I like the wild west mentality, the rebellious streak, the fact that houston is alive and dynamic....did i mention no zoning laws on houston? Fuck government telling us what to do with our property.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:39 | 1186827 High Plains Drifter
High Plains Drifter's picture

not to mention the bull dyke you have for a mayor........

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:37 | 1186828 IdioTsincracY
Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:43 | 1186844 Re-Discovery
Re-Discovery's picture

Ahhh wonderful Houston where they have

both kinds of weather, hot AND humid

both kinds of industry, Oil AND Gas

both kinds of music, Country AND Western

and both kinds of football, bad and worse!

Yes, I just officially MESSED WITH TEXAS!

(Great strippers though.)



Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:50 | 1186861 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Excellent strippers.
Large supply and value priced.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:11 | 1186902 Ted Celeste
Ted Celeste's picture

Never let anyone say you don't add value to this site.  Good work as always.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:01 | 1186884 Re-Discovery
Re-Discovery's picture

I actually love the state.  But spare me the "paradise" nonsense.  Houston-9th Ward is an acquired taste that even most othe Texans have yet to acquire.  Remember, no zoning also means your neighbor can raise pigs and have an outhouse.  Limited government is great, but I wouldn't necessarily trust what they tell you about the fossil fuel runoff and your water (what they haven't sold to T. Boone.)  Everyone partying and carrying guns is great, but that does tend to increase the possibilty of getting shot. 

For every Ron Paul you give the rest of us you ruin it with an LBJ or George W.  And if I have to explain, well, as I stated above, your teachers should get stiffed.




Wed, 04/20/2011 - 13:05 | 1188797 SilverRhino
SilverRhino's picture

You appear to have a reading comprehension problem.  

IN COMPARISON .... bear that phrase in mind.  

And for the record, I'll take my chances with my neighbor's guns versus the state's tyranny.  

And as for an LBJ, or GW I'll see you and raise you with Carter, Obama, Wilson, FDR, and Lincoln.  

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 13:35 | 1188945 dugorama
dugorama's picture

Lincoln?  Really?  You're bashing Lincoln?  Cause you think the south should have been allowed to leave the union or because we should still be slave holders?

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:00 | 1186708 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

Double down on crAAPL. If it doesn't pay off the taxpayers of Texas would be glad to make up the difference.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:05 | 1186720 Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

Yeah where's all the trickle-down I was supposed to be gettin'? Trickle me!

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:15 | 1186744 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Stand still.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:12 | 1186736 strannick
strannick's picture

Get some feckin gold eejits

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:19 | 1186755 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

They should go full retard like I did.
Load up on BIDU.
Can you believe I am up almost four bucks?
Documented buying at 145 ish about a week ago.
Price target 142. Not a typo.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:18 | 1186760 gmj
gmj's picture

21%.  No problem.  Look what ITMN did on 12/16/2010: 

Look at this beauty:


Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:22 | 1186768 Richard Head
Richard Head's picture

Texas Teachers isn't all dumb, they just didn't think big enough. $250 mm of gold in October 2009:


Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:25 | 1186770 Richard Head
Richard Head's picture


Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:22 | 1186771 the grateful un...
the grateful unemployed's picture

it remains to be seen how much of a democrat Obama is, although Bush sent the Enron traders after California. they managed to get a Republican actor named governor. in a strictly partisan rant i say give Texas what they deserve. but that's blaming them for the guy in Crawford. the Calpers fund suggested they might have to take 1/4% off their projected earnings, and that would bankrupt the state. imagine twice that number. Emerging Markets? i am amazed. they may run out of chemicals to adminstor lethal injections. check the storage at Rancho Deluxe. They were saving it for GITMO. now they may have to pour double shots out of their own supply.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:32 | 1186802 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

the bush family is harvard yankee carpet bagging scum. don't blame texas for the bushes, don't blame florida for the bushes either.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:37 | 1186825 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

I could never vote democrat, but i will say that is a great insult to all the yankee carpet bagging scum.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:24 | 1186783 Hephasteus
Hephasteus's picture

They uploaded their previous earnings reports. Here they are.


Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:30 | 1186793 Misean
Misean's picture

So, the reflating the retirement fund bubble ain't cutting it either, Benny B...whatcha gonna do now, son?

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:31 | 1186809 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

the bernank is all over this. 21% is no sweat.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:24 | 1186952 knukles
knukles's picture

His Professorship's already got that dicked.  Adjusted Monetary Base is up something like a bazillion percent.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:31 | 1186794 IdioTsincracY
IdioTsincracY's picture

Gov. Perry will take care of it!

He's such a tough act with teachers, nurses, the poor, the average folks ...

just not with big companies ...

what goes around, comes around ... race to the bottom, bitchez!!!


Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:40 | 1186839 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Most economists believe that corporate income taxes harm growth, thus harming everyone.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:30 | 1186967 knukles
knukles's picture

Do those qualifiers (most and economist) include Krugman?

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:28 | 1186970 Arkadaba
Arkadaba's picture

Some ecomists believe you should pay tax where you are incorporated - state or federal.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:29 | 1186975 knukles
knukles's picture

Some economists don't think.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:33 | 1186804 bad craziness
bad craziness's picture

I don't know what is wrong with these nincompoops.  Just take 10% of the $109b and buy gold on the comex, stand for delivery and blow the whole fucking world to pieces.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:41 | 1186846 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

You are bad craziness.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:25 | 1186957 UninterestedObserver
UninterestedObserver's picture

LOL 20% gold and 20% silver - Comex defaults they make 200% everyone retires

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:25 | 1186958 UninterestedObserver
UninterestedObserver's picture

LOL 20% gold and 20% silver - Comex defaults they make 200% everyone retires

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:31 | 1186810 SAME AS IT EVER WAS

21% no problem shorts sell'em bernank squeezes them.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:40 | 1186832 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

i keep hearing about Texas going back to The Republic of.  but nothing ever happens.

i can't imagine the US even noticing, at this point.

go for it!!!

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:40 | 1186833 flacon
flacon's picture

Flash News: Ben Bernanke can now print silver coins! Silver for everyone! 

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:42 | 1186838 Number 156
Number 156's picture

They did say everything is bigger in Texas.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:42 | 1186841 3.7.77
3.7.77's picture

Put all your eggs in one basket, good idea.

I thought everything in Texas was honky-dory.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:44 | 1186852 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

You do know the definition of a texas hedge?

Going long options of the underlying commodity you own.

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:52 | 1186867 Double down
Double down's picture

Just honky 

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:41 | 1186989 Misean
Misean's picture

Honky tonk

Tue, 04/19/2011 - 23:43 | 1186845 Problem Is
Problem Is's picture

Need 21% Annual Returns Guaranteed?
See Bernie over at BLM Securities...

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:05 | 1186899 latizziforchizzi
latizziforchizzi's picture

$1500 Gold, but I still like silver more...

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:04 | 1186904 Silver Bug
Silver Bug's picture

Well. Looks like the only asset class growing at this kind of rate is commodities.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:15 | 1186937 jomama
jomama's picture

just tell those dummies to buy silver

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:26 | 1186964 teotwawki
teotwawki's picture

21%? That aint shit with hyper inflation.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:30 | 1186972 teotwawki
teotwawki's picture

I'll be their adviser: buy toilet paper, fuckers, you'll probably double your money this year.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:35 | 1186979 Slipmeanother
Slipmeanother's picture

The economy is so bad Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 03:06 | 1187135 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

The economy is soooo bad...when an American gets a check returned for "insufficient funds" he has to call the bank and ask if they mean him or them.


Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:41 | 1186984 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

gold just skewered $1500 in asia

Precious Metals Central - Gold Prices

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:40 | 1186992 Misean
Misean's picture

And the dollar's below 75 again.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:41 | 1186991 Drag Racer
Drag Racer's picture

Oklahoma Senate approves collective bargaining repeal.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:41 | 1186993 teotwawki
teotwawki's picture

Good one Angelina Jolie can I steal that?


Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:42 | 1186995 teotwawki
teotwawki's picture

News flash: University of california pension fund stockpiling toilet paper.

Just released

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:45 | 1186997 teotwawki
teotwawki's picture

I think her and brad need to start adopting native american babies from the reservations here in arizona. Keep the love here in the good ol us a.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 00:53 | 1187007 teotwawki
teotwawki's picture

Buy gold and silver now while you still can. Now do I fit in?

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 01:18 | 1187030 IQ 101
IQ 101's picture

Can any of you Z.H.ers inform me about CALPERS? I am thinking it is more toasted than Texas, I have a lot of customers on the CALPERS retire at 50 plan, it does not make much sense to me because they seem to be less than informed and weak of bicep, so I wonder where the PRODUCT is?

If Cali is douched then the USA is douched?

I'm not a financial guy but I can fix yer Toyota,

found Zero hedge and have silver lumpkins at $23. Thanks yooz guys.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 02:17 | 1187096 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture


Everyone gets bailed out except the individual and the family.

Bailouts of pensions will commence from largest to smallest to maintain Wal Mart, Costco, Liquor store purchases along with taxes and insurance premiums and co-pays; and of course Toyota mechanics ;-)

Of course, if there are riots and food shortages the older folks will be the least able to care for themselves so we may lose 10-20% (ooops, gosh, that wasn't on purpose...really).

And rationing of healthcare via making costs for common treatments for geriatric ailments out of reach will knock off another 5-10%.

The "blue" prints of blood red are not readily available, but are not hard to see forming either.


Wed, 04/20/2011 - 01:57 | 1187079 Catullus
Catullus's picture

These teachers' associations are financial terrorists.  Giving out an extra pension check to retirees in the years when the fund goes above their long term average rate of return to remain actuarially sound?! That all but guarantees the fund will be undercapitalized over time.  And why? Because it's doing something for teachers!  Absolutely irresponsible.  They're just lurking in state houses everywhere looking to fuck taxpayers over.  These teacher associations and unions do more to rob teachers and taxpayers than anyone else.  They create these systemic funding problems over time and sound the righteous indignation trumpets when someone says "live off what you were already paid".

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 02:29 | 1187107 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

Would that be different than the Banks and Wall Street in general?

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 06:02 | 1187253 fiftybagger
fiftybagger's picture

What's the saying? "If something looks too good to be true, it probably is"

They can't go broke fast enough to suit me.

Wed, 04/20/2011 - 08:41 | 1187564 j0nx
j0nx's picture

Agreed. As long as we are busting teachers' unions then let's start busting firemen and police unions as well but not before we start capping CEO pay at 50x average worker salary and rolling through Wall Street with a steam roller flattening every corrupt bankster and financial terrorist that happens to get in the way. Then we can round up the 30+ million illegals that are here sucking down tens of billions of dollars in taxpayer money in welfare and law enforcement resources every year. Until then fughet about it. Unions are the least of our worries until the other shit is nixed.

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