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Time To Prank Call Zhou Xiaochuan
After all, the rumors are all false, right? So he should be more than happy to pick up his phone, which Bloomberg lists as +86-10-6619-4114. The first to get the PBoC's governor shouting obscenities on tape, wins a Zero Hedge hat.
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Tyler...
Look in the 604 exchange.
No offence Tyler, but why did STRATFOR break this news before you did ?
Sorry to butt in on your comment but can someone explain to me the joke? Thanks in advance. TC
jokes on U, testicular, how's that exam feel any way.? don't think i will ever have the pleasure of one.
What.. does collecting stop spoilage?
not sure. ya mean me collecting so many junks? my delete button still won't work. U know why?
ya, I responded and once someone does you can no longer edit. Junks means you're rubbing someone just right. And no, I meant it in a Squirrel way. Have at it and have some fun. peace
Junks means you're rubbing someone just right. i like that interpretation, of junking, compliment for me. what's a squirrel way, nuts. i have a friend mr squirrel. he goes crazy and shakes and climbs the tree when he sees he+=me. no delete.
They're making too much noise....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hVuL5d9MMkM
Hmmm. The "market" rallies 165 points Friday on the supposed good news only to give back most of it today. Interesting...
This friday will be another jobreport and anything above 45K joblosses would normally push it lower so be sure to go long as it will spike 200 points for sure.
NonOnononononoNoOnoNOnoNOnonoOnn no
First, nobody looses that much money.
Second, if they do, they don't talk about it.
Third, if they did, you can bet you sweet ass that Goldman was the counterparty because if they lost that much, somebody else made out 'cause all the treasuries, Fannie, Freddie, FHA, GNMA and the like paper's only been a goin' Up in Price this year, so it had to be some stupid ass hedge if it was real.
Somptlhin' smerr gouffie in Bleghingh.
Just friend him on facebook or linkedin.
Twisted....
Funny if he's alive.
Sick if he's roting in a ditch somewhere with two in the back of the head.
So you are suggesting suicide...
I believe this is the standard way of suicide in China, much like the Japanese have Seppuku.
How about jail him somewhere while using a double to shadow his action for a yr or 2
then sub in another person in a 1 or 2
http://www.linkedin.com/commonSearch?type=people&keywords=Zhou+Xiaochuan&pplSearchOrigin=GLHD&pageKey=nmp-home
He's got some optional careers, all located in America :)
Hahaha, yes it is, especially when said "suicide" occurs with "two in the back of the head." We should start charging China for the rights to use our spook tactics. If the patent office can't handle it, I'd bet that a simple copyright or even proper registry with the RIAA would do just fine.
If his parents receive a bill for the bullet (chi.coms only use one), then you know for certain they executed him.
This is true.
Yep, he shot himself in the head 5 times, lit himself on fire, then jumped out the window. Obvious suicide.
*pausing only once to reload*
I believe there's an interview involved first...
IT'S WATERBOARDING TIME!! YIHAAAAA!!!
If he's shot in the back of the head, it'll only be with one bullet, not two. And his family will be billed for the bullet.
What if he shouts "I've fallen and I can't get up?" Then what do we do?
or
"They are at the door now!"
or
"I didn't do it."
or...
His match.com profile puts his location as 'on a beach'. Oh, and he enjoys the company of athletic blondes 21-25, MsCreant.
A hit squad of young athletic blondes just might do the trick. Screw him to death. Very tricky.
That's what he gets for smoking so much....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_L8DcjFOD1k
Perhaps he just went and got impounded since he forgot his name...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=opZqhwr_pRY
the madness... terrible...
Gives a whole new meaning to Volley Ball.
Got him...comment in Chinese: "No, we do not have elections in China"
Cleep.
Edit: "No we do not have erections in China."
His recorded answer to your team: "There is a no Wang here!"
i wish i was funny, like U.
Well, when you look at the quote pun-etically.
Zhou is on his way to Greece:
That was pretty funny, especially having flown Olympic Airways, Cyprus Airways, and Gulf Air for many years. :)
Greek security had to detain him and fly him over to the States. All went well until one Greek secret service agent stopped for a Greek coffee at Star Mitsos Cafe:
Is that like a tripple short breve Greek style...
"How much for the dip in the window Mommy?"
OH hush child we already have too many Leos"
Hello, Hello, Zhou?
Can you hear me now?
Books
Just saw him at Bimbo Bar in the Meatpacking District sippin' a mojito.
That's just wong !
Walking through the streets of SoHo in the rain
He was looking for the place called Lee Ho Fooks
For to get a big dish of beef chow mein
Someone picked up and said "U NO CARR HERE!"
It's a chinese number but it's a answer machine or say that is speaking and it's a woman. (could be that they are now twisting his balls and that his voice is changing pitch) :)
The same number is listed on PBOC site.
http://www.pbc.gov.cn/english/hanglingdao/hanglingdao/zhouxiaochuan.asp
Maybe it's too late to call him (I mean, it's night time in China).
Probably an automated message saying " Sorry, you can connect right now future slave. All circuits are busy".
All the automated messages of this type I have heard in China are a female voice (at least AT&T).
He's already on the line, having a long chat with Miss Cleo, trying to figure out just WTF he should do next. :)
Goddamu Mongowians!
and to hell with Georgia ;-)
Just be sure to order the shitty beef.
Seriously, has the guy been found or what? Rumor or truth?
in a hot tub with Matt Simmons' wife
In china they call it "taking the pink bath"
Step 1: fill the tub with hot water
Step 2: slice your wrists
Step 3: drink a bottle a strong liquor
Step 4: MEMORY LANE BABY!!!
For best results, swap the order of steps 2 and 3.
Did anyone here see the spike in the price of gold on the yahoo finance site today? I saw that spike to $3400 and just about shit! :-D
http://finance.yahoo.com/q?s=GCU10.CMX
Reverse flash crash.
Man I gotta go to work!
Zhou just made a small buy. Then COMEX busted.
holy shit, whats that all about ? Its still on the graph.
Nice grab... thanks for the info!
This is no small anomaly! Tyler, can you elaborate any further?
3400 should probably be the true price....if not much much higher:)
Shouldn't the opposite have occurred, showing the relative strength in UST?
Still expecting ordinary and reasonable?
To a degree, yes. The gold bull argument stems from a devalued and debased currency. Therefore, wouldn't it be relatively ZH-like to assume that a short covering in UST's implies inherent strength?
Someone over at GoldSilverChat saw it too:
http://goldsilverchat.com/BBchat/viewtopic.php?f=23&t=9154&p=52114
Hey! Looks like that site is also filled with paranoid people like us.
I like them already :)
Na they are noting that zh is talking about it.
.
Maybe someone actually sold some...at their own price ;-)
...! "Hyperinflation reset coming to a town near you"
R U on a rollar coast....er
FREE HAT! FREE HAT! FREE HAT!
You get a free pack of condoms. Not because you won but because 1 of you is enough for this world :)
want some free meds to?
forget the meds and send some single serving lube packs...
What Miles, you think he can repack his bearings?
If FOTD has a free pack of condoms then it's FOTD's partner/prospective partner I am thinking about... even if they're a single serving friend. It would be improper not to include a complete set of single servings for a citizen of the CN. After all, some here may not yet appreciate that the Limits, Conditions and Consequences, or the LCC's of love always apply....
This story should have a "Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego" theme.
"Cartright? Cartright?"
You beat me to it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6M0-SPgWP9c&feature=related
HERROoo, you are breaking my barrs herre
1948-2010 RIP
if the Chinese CB twits were trained in the US, they are Goldshort programmed financial assassins
killing with no appearance of human emotion
8% Chinese reduction in UST notational in the last few months short covering/margin calls at sqiud Cayman Development/trading entities?
X-"more fun in the USA" bitchez
Ask him if he's seen the survivalist show with Mr. and Mrs. Hawke.
You know, Mike.
Shit! He has his phone on Call Forwarding and Douchenger answered.
Found him! He gave me a number 3 lunch special around the corner. That muthafucka can dish up some mean moo-shu pork. Do I win the prize?
Seriously...big ups on this one. This is like a 4chan prank, and I think it's fucking hilarious. While we're at it, perhaps we could sign him up for some gay porn subscriptions and about a thousand moving boxes?
The real story here isn't Gov. Zhou's losses but that this news was leaked because of power struggles within the Communist Party’s economic hierarchy.
This global crisis is having more of an impact on China's internal policies than is apparent from the daily press releases.
Just wait till the trade war starts...
I called but he was stuck in a meeting with a couple of hedge fund managers from the US.
http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=lqakCa-MysE&vq=small#t=6
China's Anti-Ship Ballistic Missile - a Long-Feared Weapon Known As the "Carrier Killer" - is Close to Operational
Military technological advantage is the most fleeting of all.
If you can't print, you must acquit(cover)
Gold lease rates.....rising!!!
Anybody have Bernanke's phone number?
1-800-BUBBLE-BEN
Need junk removal?
1-800-GOT-JUNK are the junk removal experts!The Goldman Sachs operator will connect you.
ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I've got'm under speeddial 1 and got so used of only pressing one that I don't really know his number anymore. Maybe if you just press 1?
1-800-Why-Rent. That still leads to a glorious place in Mushroom Farms and a commuter bus ride from the Pocono's...
Anyone who has experience hiding massive amounts of losses from the books and is conceited enough to actually think they can get away with it will never go without work here in Soviet America.
His only worry should be his experience is for much lesser amounts of losses to hide than he would be responsible for here.
Any Chinese speakers (or friends of Chinese speakers)...get them on the phone now to yell at Tyrer:
United States:
888.qui.zero (888.784.9376)
Zurich:
+41 43 501 6717
London:
+44 20 3318 4753
you mean Tylel...
+10000 HAHAHA
'TYLEL YOU MOTELFLUCKEL SON OF GOOSE!
AS THE GLEAT PANDA KUNG FU MASTEL IS MY WITNEZ I'LL KICKE YOU ASS!
Ooooooh....vewy fruent!
you'll see him soon enough in the mummies from around the world tour at your local science and history museum.
Hey Zhou, don't be afraid
Take a sad song and make it better
+1
Yeah, I do think we should give it up for that one...+ at least 1.
86-10-6619-4114
For a country and a people obsessed by numerology, no one in China--much less a senior government official--would be caught with these four digits as their telephone number. Whereas the numerals "8" and "6" signify good fortune, "4" literally means "death." Add the numeral "1" and 14 translates into "wants death." This most certainly must be a wrong number.
[For comparison, Citi's Hong Kong trading desk is 2888-8888.]
And Nick Leeson's error account number was all eights :)
ring, ring..
"herro?"
"yes, do you have Prince Albert in a can?"
"roh, but much happy price on srightry used river in rew box"
"oh… no thanks."
click…
I believe Zhou Xiaochuan's dissapearance may stem from his pursuit of his refridgerator, which, according to my sources, is running.
Do the obscenities have to be in English?
I need to upload a screenshot I saved because its deleted now and nobody will believe me. Pretty please?
http://tinypic.com/
ALL OF YOUR DEBT IS NOW BELONG TO US!!!
Wasn't he the guy in the movie The Hangover?
He was. The Politburo gave him a Vegas weekend pass to make up the shorfall. Too many Mojhitos and he ends up in the back of the fratboys trunk. Luckily the footage cant be googled back in the People's republic. Frickin Mojhitos...
No offense, ZH team, but who gives a sh1t about this guy ?
Yeah, good question. Who fucking cares about the central banker of the second largest economy in the world, anyways?
Okay, when do we get to see the artist rendering of HIS desktop? 3, 2, 1...
Found him! Los Angeles Freeway. I thought he'd be driving a cadirrac, but no...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HcyyCi2b2AY
EDIT: Listen to the first 20 seconds of audio - the guy definitely sounds remorseful.
I was in Cuba, yes Cuba, in June 94. I'm not going explain here why I was there but let's say it wasn't quite legal. My first venture there was the Mariel boat lift.
I sailed into Key West the night before this chase and had no clue about OJ. I drove back to Miami that next morning, slept until the afternoon. I turned on the tube to see this chase scene on every freaking channel. I started calling my friends. WTF is this? OJ murdered his wife? Of course, it was difficult to explain why I had no freaking idea about OJ.
Nuff said.
an O J , you got away with it.
nuff said
yOU hAVE No chance to survive. Make your time...
All your shorts are belong to us!
huh?
just got the answer machine with the message
all your bills are belong to us
goddamit beaten to the draw :)
Hey Mo, its from this...aka aybabtu
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qItugh-fFgg
Oddly enough, Zhou was spotted aggressively bidding up the 10 yr notes pit today. It appears he made out pretty well based on today's price action. He was later spotted at the Billy Goat Tavern completely hammered and happy...
SooRRReee can,t take Yur CCCaaallllllll Nnnnooowww ttoo bbussseey sstopppiinnng thee Doooww ffrrooom Taaannkkinng !!!!!!!! Comrade.
Does the zerrohedge hat come in green?
FYI
http://mandarin.about.com/od/educationlearning/a/telephone.htm
Downloaded the thirty seven sounds of mandarin http://mandarin.about.com/od/pronunciation/l/blsounds.htm playing them on random loop drives the cat crazy!
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