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US GDP Data May Be Delayed Due To Fire At Commerce Department

Tyler Durden's picture




 

And now for the envelope... oops, it just burned down. Oh well. First no budget, now, no GDP. According to unsubstantiaed rumors, the fire is headed to the records room at the US Treasury next. Unfortunately for our creditors, there will soon be no paper record we owe money to anyone. And like that, our $13.1 trillion in debt, it's gone.

 

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Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:40 | 433252 Rick64
Rick64's picture

I hate when that happens.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:55 | 433278 THE DORK OF CORK
THE DORK OF CORK's picture

Burning down the house can be cathartic.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=xNnAvTTaJjM

 

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:59 | 433286 Jeff Lebowski
Jeff Lebowski's picture

Was the GDP data hand written on a napkin?

Credibility fail.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:28 | 433333 Rick64
Rick64's picture

This is what happens when you cook numbers written on a napkin.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:29 | 433334 Rick64
Rick64's picture

double post. too much coffee.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:29 | 433336 Hansel
Hansel's picture

Clearly, the files were not in the computer.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 10:33 | 433576 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

It is handy to write important things on a napkin...If it should happen that NO FIRE occurs, then you can always claim that "THE DOG ATE IT."

I know I'm not the only one here who has used this...

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 09:47 | 433469 Inspector Asset
Inspector Asset's picture

Ah yes, that sound like a good plot!

After the great war, paper records all lost, digtial records are fudged.

 

A need for a world wide curreny, but this time for many reasons (security, tax evasion) the plan calls for insering a chip into everyone's fore arm instead of debit cards.

 

JP Morgan has even stated it will deposit a $1000 into the accounts of all the people who come forward and volunteer themselves for the chip.  That ought to get the stimulas situation burning along with the feds balance sheet. 

Now I see why the Fed needs to have a direct connection into people's homes.  They need to monitor those chips, make sure, the next Bill Gates isn't hacking the system for a few extra bucks into his account.

Inspector Asset

www.WallStOnion.blogspot.com

 

 

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:41 | 433255 damage
damage's picture

Hah!

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:17 | 433263 etrader
etrader's picture

.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:42 | 433257 New_Meat
New_Meat's picture

reichstag?

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:46 | 433266 cossack55
cossack55's picture

Hey! I made reference to the Reichstag 2 days ago.  More proof TPTB are reading ZH.  Thats good.  Keep them out of the history books.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:47 | 433268 Ethics Gradient
Ethics Gradient's picture

Godwins law by post 4?

Awesome.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:51 | 433274 goldfreak
goldfreak's picture

Zerohedge and the goldbugs did it, round them up

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:57 | 433279 Arius
Arius's picture

no, just you...one is enough, and just to be safe lets claim he is not okay...mentally...

hahhahhhaa

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:59 | 433284 Arius
Arius's picture

oppsss

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:45 | 433264 Catullus
Catullus's picture

We don't need no water let that mother....

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:45 | 433265 Tic tock
Tic tock's picture

hopefully the fire has been contained

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:48 | 433269 cossack55
cossack55's picture

Or if it spreads to Tres. and 33 Liberty, Poof! no debts.  Of course the IRS buildings are constructed of asbestos.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:50 | 433273 The Franchise
The Franchise's picture

vey well played

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:48 | 433271 docj
docj's picture

Just ask Goldman.  I'm sure they had the number before yesterday.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:48 | 433272 Snidley Whipsnae
Snidley Whipsnae's picture

No budget, no exports, no GDP figures, no need for a commerce dept...

Next up OMB sinks into swamp that DC is built on?

All FDIC employees take early retirement option on the same day?

FED moves head quarters to Bahamas for tax advantages?

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:59 | 433287 Mesquite
Mesquite's picture

Previous Prez moves to Paraguay...

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:55 | 433277 kaiten
kaiten's picture

The fire begun while they were cooking the data. ;p

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:15 | 433301 Arius
Arius's picture

a couple of years ago, the Commerce stopped issuing M3 because of costs ("printing paper)...now, there is a fire and they cant issue GDP....one cant help thinking what is next????

My guess will be "shut up" just take it!  open and clear so there are no misunderstanding....yeah well, life goes on....nothing to see just move on....everything is OKAY...we always come back stronger...

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:18 | 433310 MichiganMilitiaMan
MichiganMilitiaMan's picture

+1

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 10:37 | 433586 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

Well-played!

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 07:58 | 433280 Wyndtunnel
Wyndtunnel's picture

Oh really? *sigh*

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:11 | 433296 THE DORK OF CORK
THE DORK OF CORK's picture

Sir, do you like your financial data rare, medium or well done ?

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:09 | 433292 Tense INDIAN
Tense INDIAN's picture

i guess this will be the funniest recession i will ever be in .....

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:19 | 433315 MichiganMilitiaMan
MichiganMilitiaMan's picture

Yeah, laughing all the way to the apocolypse.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:47 | 433364 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

This will be the last recession you'll ever be in. It's all depression from here. Doesn't matter where you start counting if the final number is always zero.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 15:30 | 434123 MichiganMilitiaMan
MichiganMilitiaMan's picture

Just the encouragement I was looking for.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 10:43 | 433609 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

Not funny like "ha-ha,"  funny like "queer."

(not you -- the current reality)

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:13 | 433298 Advoc8tr
Advoc8tr's picture

Now that takes the cake ..... wonder what the diversion event [between now and when they 'recover' the GDP data]  will be?

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:16 | 433304 cossack55
cossack55's picture

When the FD opened the hydrants someone lit a cigarette and the whole block exploded. Something about fracking.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:18 | 433309 ColonelCooper
ColonelCooper's picture

As the Church Lady used to say:

"That's conveeeeenient."

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:18 | 433314 NumberNone
NumberNone's picture

Other excuse offered but not used:

- We do the GDP calcs on solar powered calculators and it was cloudy in DC yesterday.

They probably picked the better excuse.  Maybe they could blame the fire on an Obama cigarrette incident. 

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:21 | 433317 jkruffin
jkruffin's picture

WOW, they are talking evacuating the gulf coast, holy bajezzzzus.

"We're going to have to evacuate the gulf states," said Matt Simmons, founder of Simmons and Co., an oil investment firm and, since the April 20 blowout, the unflagging source of end-of-the-world predictions. "Can you imagine evacuating 20 million people? . . . This story is 80 times worse than I thought."

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/06/22/AR201006...

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:26 | 433328 NumberNone
NumberNone's picture

To quote another poster somewhere else "They've murdered the Gulf.." 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qO193f8xAls

 

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:36 | 433346 IBelieveInMagic
IBelieveInMagic's picture

The mythical "they". "We" is more succinct.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:51 | 433375 pan-the-ist
pan-the-ist's picture

Anyone that drives...

Think dustbowl 1930-1936 except the population of the Gulf Coast is much larger than the Okies. 

Hopefully this won't impact Favre's revenge on the Saints, or that will ruin my year.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 09:06 | 433416 Snidley Whipsnae
Snidley Whipsnae's picture

Future headline..."Saints repeat as Super Bowl Champs after relocation of team to Anchorage Alaska!"

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 09:52 | 433478 tmosley
tmosley's picture

BS.  I didn't tell BP that they couldn't drill in 500 ft of water, forcing them to go drill somewhere at the edge of their experience.  

It's like blaming people who use electricity for Chernobyl.  It wasn't the fault of the people, it was the fault of those in the government who made the dumbassed decisions. 

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 10:46 | 433621 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

+10

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 14:35 | 434031 pan-the-ist
pan-the-ist's picture

It was partially BPs fault, many wells have been drilled in deeper water and then deeper underground.  BP cut corners.  If the government has any fault it is because they didn't have a 'well inspector' on site to check that non-existent rules were being followed.

If I have to have an inspector check to make sure that I nailed my roof on correctly, it stands to reason that BP aught to have one to make sure their fucking oil well is drilled properly.

Your thinking is backward, BTW.  BP and others would never allow inspectors and regulations as they are 'self regulated.'  The problem is that any regulation of a corp is seen as waste and our government doesn't govern.  Your short sightedness seems to be part of the problem.  Then rather than produce quality products (wells in this case) they hedge their shit with insurance because it is cheaper than doing quality work...  This is called risk management.

If this were a shitty well in 500 feet of water the 'perceived' damage would be much worse and tougher for BP to hide.

It is partially my fault for driving and consuming oil.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 09:01 | 433402 Snidley Whipsnae
Snidley Whipsnae's picture

Here is more on the situation from 'Peak Oil' site, quoting Simmons and summing up situation with a tropical system approaching and predicted to push crude oil, methane gas, hydrogen sulfide gas, benzene and methelyne chloride ashore in the Gulf States.

Also predicted tracks of approaching tropical system.

http://peakoil.com/enviroment/matt-simmons-predicts-gulf-evacuation/

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:21 | 433320 cbaba
cbaba's picture

All GDP data is cooked, they need some time to adjust to new developments, when debt increases they have to increase the GDP, employ some more government workers and voila, suddenly everything looks good.

 

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:34 | 433342 Turd Ferguson
Turd Ferguson's picture

Mandy's pressed-straight hair today is giving me a morning missile.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:46 | 433361 slovester
slovester's picture

Bernanke and Obama were quickly at the scene - Ben doused the fire with gasoline while Obama did a solo on the lyre.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:50 | 433368 cowdiddly
cowdiddly's picture

No worrys, We Have a comprehensive fire policy with AIG. 

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 08:58 | 433392 Hedge Jobs
Hedge Jobs's picture

GDP number out. 2.7%! another revision down. might find it hard to find this though on CNN money. It flashed up breifly as a breaking news story, then the editor must have realized it was bad and pulled the headline! its now got a little spot in latest news column, about 3 down.

 

These guys are unbeleivable and are so obviously part of the ponzi. They reckon the "sweeping" fin reform should give the markets a boost! WTF?

 

HFT's wont know what to do today

 

 

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 09:00 | 433400 VFR
VFR's picture

actually delayed by FIRE ALARM going off. !!

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 09:01 | 433403 the not so migh...
the not so mighty maximiza's picture

GDP data is HOT, real HOT.

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 09:08 | 433423 VFR
VFR's picture

someone shouted , "HELL FIRE , THIS GDP NUMBER IS SH*T". Then the alarm went off. Everyone left the building. Allegedly BB was seen lurking near the alarm button

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 12:27 | 433748 Calculated_Risk
Calculated_Risk's picture

Wasn't there  a fire at the cftc building just before the meeting a few months ago?! WTF?!

Fri, 06/25/2010 - 15:15 | 434093 bmfe
bmfe's picture

F’ yeah. US wins 1 style point  for lying with flair.  Take that China.

Sat, 06/26/2010 - 22:22 | 435874 zirb
zirb's picture

Poof!

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