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Watch The Teleprompter's Update On The "Status Of Efforts To Find A Balanced Approach To Deficit Reduction"

Tyler Durden's picture


This is getting bad. The market, like the good Pavlov dog it is, will start associating the president's now daily appearance with market plunges. Oh well. Some comedy relief nonetheless for those (the majority) that is not watching the Tiger address at the same time.



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Mon, 07/11/2011 - 10:59 | 1443761 Seasmoke
Seasmoke's picture

oh boy, this is looking like a really bad day

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:33 | 1443816 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

I loved it when he said:

"The average American is not concerned with the ins and outs of every Treasury auction, nor should they be.  That's what we're paid for."




In other words, "don't watch our ponzinomics at work.  We need to keep this ponzi going, so lets raise this debt ceiling and continue the idiocy of running a fake economy, based on nothing material, just shifting ledger amounts to falsify activity."



Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:35 | 1444023 augie
augie's picture

Unconscionable, I had to turn it off. It's such a beautiful day today why spoil it? 

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:43 | 1444057 camaro68ss
camaro68ss's picture


Im just so happy, i dont have to pay for my gas anymore, I dont have to pay for my food or my house anymore, If i vote for him and help him out, hes going to help me.

where does obama get his money

"his stash, obama stash, O-BAM-A!

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 12:02 | 1444157 walcott
walcott's picture

no shit! Hey don't pay attention to what the hell is going on peons.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 12:53 | 1444323 knukles
knukles's picture

Hell, they don't pay any attention what's going on either.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 12:02 | 1444158 walcott
walcott's picture

no shit! Hey don't pay attention to what the hell is going on peons.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:47 | 1444080 THE DORK OF CORK
THE DORK OF CORK's picture

Enjoying watching this sequence of visuals & music with the background musings of the Great leader.


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:01 | 1443763 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

What's the over/under on how late Obama will be for his 11 AM conference?

I say 13 minutes. If he played a round of golf this morning, 22 minutes.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:05 | 1443797 augie
augie's picture

Is that the amount of time the focus groups have determined as affecting the greatest appearance of importance? We certainly cannot afford to have any of the men behind the curtain (or in this case teleprompter) revealed at such an important time lol. 

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:11 | 1443863 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Christ, even my proctologist isn't running this late by 11AM.

And he's up to his elbows in assholes.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:15 | 1443879 augie
augie's picture

i am speaking from ignorance here as i have no need of a proctologist yet, but from what i have heard, the doctor is only suppose to use one finger, the whole arm seems a bit excessive. Perhaps it's time for a new doctor? 

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:20 | 1443910 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

I'm an American. So the Hershey highway has been steadily widened by the Fed since 1913. You do the math. :)

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:29 | 1443985 augie
augie's picture

lol touché my good man, touché. 

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:30 | 1443987 Whatta
Whatta's picture

ewww. How am I supposed to eat my fudgsicle now? Thanks a lot.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 13:50 | 1444590 Don Keot
Don Keot's picture

You can imaine my surprise as I was told it would be a digital examination.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:09 | 1443840 BC6
BC6's picture

where is the bunghole in chief?


i'll take 47 minutes on the over

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:11 | 1443862 small watcher
small watcher's picture

11 + 2 minute warning = 13.

Wow, I'm impressed.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 14:41 | 1444796 mr_T
mr_T's picture

MobaMa ..... President for life....

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:13 | 1443875 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

Perfect fucking line man.  13 minutes....what do you know?!?!?!  ANSWER ME!!!! haha

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:15 | 1443881 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

I could see him not showing up at all.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:15 | 1443888 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

On the nose!!! Good Call. 

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:16 | 1443890 Blano
Blano's picture

Damn CD you nailed it.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:23 | 1443936 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

I was a bookie during my tender youth. I make made money off the vig so I know how to set the spread and work the over/under.

BTW now I'm a broker. Same thing. :)

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:29 | 1443989 Blano
Blano's picture

Lol slipping the past tense in there.  : )

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:46 | 1444077 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

My lawyer has access to my ZH account and makes 'improvements' as she sees fit.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 13:23 | 1444453 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

lol    can't wait till you are writing for the teleprompter for Tyler's prez run

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:30 | 1443996 trentusa
trentusa's picture

Eddie Murphy in Trading Places: ya'll sound like a coupla bookies to me, so how do we make selves rich while putting them in poorhouse @ same? That is the question, 2b or not2b, to suffer the slings & arrows of an outrageous fortune, or-

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:35 | 1444024 ThirdCoastSurfer
ThirdCoastSurfer's picture

There's also Eddie Murphy in "The Distinguished Gentleman" that so perfectly exemplifies politics. 

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:31 | 1444007 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Reggie Valentine... Capricorn!

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:39 | 1444043 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Bottom line is... Y'all can go back to your jobs now... Nothing to see here... This isn't the BIG ONE... Weezy (er-um-'Elizabeth')

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 19:02 | 1445777 Stanley Lord
Stanley Lord's picture

Tender youth? You can not write!!! Who uses "tender" to describe youth? The only thing tender is your penis after the beatings it must suffer.

Your postings are childish if you have to include silly pictures to make a point.

Plus you lie about being a bookie.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:22 | 1443930 trentusa
trentusa's picture

good one, CG. U'n Tyler keep it up. Its working. Smthng def happening.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:00 | 1443771 Internet Tough Guy
Internet Tough Guy's picture

Did you enjoy the gold smackdown just before 11am? How obvious.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:01 | 1443781 HITMAN56
HITMAN56's picture

WTF was that in gold?

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:02 | 1443788 azusgm
azusgm's picture

Check what was done to silver.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:04 | 1443800 Blano
Blano's picture

Yeah what happened??

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:17 | 1443898 DeadFred
DeadFred's picture

it held at the 20 dma. a good sign I think.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:17 | 1443900 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

PWGoFM needed a cash position to buy the bottom of equities when Dow hits 11,900.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 13:00 | 1444352 knukles
knukles's picture

JPM, HSBC,, doing their share God's work (Goldman's in other lines) ensuring that when He The Anointed Speaks, All Markets Must Follow (as in orders, just part of the Perceptions Management effort)
The Dollar and Treasuries Must Rally (America is good and on the right track, for He Shows Us The Way of Righteousness) stocks must fall (see what will befall us if it's Not Done According to Plan.)

Not too complex by my book....

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:04 | 1443801 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

No kidding.  Look at silver, even more obvious.  This government is extremely desperate.

Glad I own something that is in direct conflict with, and goes agains, their policy actions.  They obviously can't have gold and silver break out and, since we all know governments are totally incompetent, they will try until total failure.


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:00 | 1443777 Incubus
Incubus's picture

Noise, noise, noise. 


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:02 | 1443784 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Obama to announce that Tiger Wood's is retiring?

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:06 | 1443815 Blano
Blano's picture

And maybe taking Timmay's place at Treasury??

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:10 | 1443846 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Tiger would excel at the SEC from what I have heard.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:14 | 1443878 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

I came here for the Tiger Woods interview... Must be in the wrong room...

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:42 | 1444056 Ricky Bobby
Ricky Bobby's picture

LOL  Hilarious!

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:02 | 1443787 caerus
caerus's picture

1550 is a bitch...

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:02 | 1443789 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

The snake is beginning to eat its tail....

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:07 | 1443827 doomandbloom
doomandbloom's picture


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:03 | 1443791 Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

Wait, this is a barber shop quartet performance?

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:03 | 1443794 4shzl
4shzl's picture

Goldscum/PimPco groupies: assume the position -- 5-yr. augers down 11bps to 1.47%.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:03 | 1443795 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

This will be Obama's speech:



I've got some good new and I've got some less good news.

Let's start with the fucked up news first... My dog ate my homework and Michel didn't want to blow me this morning.

and for the rest...

taxes will go up 10% on everything and we're broke.




Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:08 | 1443838 coppertop
coppertop's picture

anthony weiner made more sense

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:22 | 1443931 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

  Funny sudden... I would add that the Wookie didn't shave, and he didnt want his "Bat wings" rubbed raw, as he is going to do some squirming...

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:04 | 1443805 mynhair
mynhair's picture

Spew Fest!

Beer & popcorn, any one?


PS, Bush did it.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:04 | 1443809 Taint Boil
Taint Boil's picture

I just love the Obama face LOL almost beats the deer in the head light pic

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:19 | 1443913 karzai_luver
karzai_luver's picture

obamao had a better dentist on the gvt tab of course, only diff.....

p.s. the deer at least has enough sense to know it's in over it's head.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:05 | 1443810 urbanelf
urbanelf's picture

8:07 - 5 assholes I've never seen before TXTing in front of America.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:05 | 1443811 walcott
walcott's picture

will this fakeitude shit finally end? disgusting.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:06 | 1443819 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

Our community organizer's biggest job is to sound relevant...

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:06 | 1443821 Lord Welligton
Lord Welligton's picture

Who are the people standing at the front?

Self-important journalists?

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:06 | 1443823 aVian
aVian's picture

how late will the TOTUS be today?

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:07 | 1443829 john_connor
john_connor's picture

Chuck Todd is such a tool

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:07 | 1443830 jefe95
jefe95's picture

Is this a blackberry demonstration video?

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:07 | 1443833 Lord Maximus
Lord Maximus's picture

Over/Under - Oba-Mao will be 10 minutes late to this presser

Me: Over by 5

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:08 | 1443834 r101958
r101958's picture

Does 'a day late and a dollar short' fit here?

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:15 | 1443870 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

 a day late and a dollar short


Math question:


Obama is 1.4 trillion short.

At what year/day/hour will he appear on television.


Type answer here => ________

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:08 | 1443837 Rynak
Rynak's picture

The market, like the good Pavlov dog it is, will start associating the president's now daily appearance with market plunges.

Lol, i've been thinking exactly that this morning.... "Whenever O or Ben do a speech, the market goes down".

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:13 | 1443867 r101958
r101958's picture

Maybe 'a day late and a few trillion short' is more fitting?

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:09 | 1443839 mynhair
mynhair's picture

Save money!

Cut off Moochelle's french fry allowance.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:09 | 1443841 caerus
caerus's picture

They should open this charade with a nice ventriloquist act or something...err wait that's the main act i forgot...

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:10 | 1443844 coppertop
coppertop's picture

i trust obama

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:15 | 1443885 thedrickster
thedrickster's picture

As do I, basking in the warm glow of hope, wishing ill of the haters.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:11 | 1443845 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

The Republicans are what they are, but they are the only Republicans we have.  Time to grow a pair.  Ask Hillary or Sheila how it's done.

Obummer is dog meat.  Soon, he won't be able to go to a Black church without getting told the truth and spit on.  It's over, Dude.  Your sorry ass has been fired!

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:32 | 1444008 SRV - ES339
SRV - ES339's picture

Right... bring on Bachman... she'll have this mess fixed up in a month.

The Tea Party controlled GOP is being run by the corporations and for the corporations (with a little wacco right wing religion on the side). I mean really... you're actually comfortable lining up behind Bachman, Boehner, and Canter?

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:49 | 1444087 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

"candy asses & jesus freaks"!

James Coburn - Afflicted

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 12:12 | 1444189 Max Fischer
Max Fischer's picture

If Bachmann is the hard-core Christian that she claims, does this mean she subscribes to the Christian doctrine that wives should be subservient to their husbands?  If elected, does this mean her husband will actually be calling the shots in the White House, per Biblical orders (Ephesians 5:21-32)?

Last week, Bachmann signed a pledge to ban pornography. If Bachmann is elected, will porn become outlawed?  Christians are so funny....

- Max Fischer, Civis Mundi


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 12:51 | 1444316 overmedicatedun...
overmedicatedundersexed's picture

max, the banning of pornography would effect you How? we all want to know.

if we went back to the days when the skin mags were hidden behind the counter and blue movies ah dvd's were kept there as well it might not be so bad for our society of course the internet would suffer,,too bad.LOL


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 14:33 | 1444772 SRV - ES339
SRV - ES339's picture

Pretty weak overmed... how about the over the top hypocracy (and inconsitancy) of her government managed positions on social issues, while claiming less government is the solution to all problems, and the core of her leadership principles?

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 16:42 | 1445312 Max Fischer
Max Fischer's picture

This is just another example of Tea Party hypocrisy, and few politicians exemplify it better than Bachmann.

She (and her constituents) are so quick to jump on their soapboxes and rant about liberty and freedom from government control....except, EXCEPT, if it conflicts with their own wallet or personal beliefs. Then, they want the exact opposite:  specific government regulations  to protect their government checks and Christian ideologies.  It's pure hypocrisy.

Tea Party goons are only critical of government spending and government regulation if it doesn't directly benefit them financially or coincide with their particular, narrow-minded social beliefs. 

In rhetoric, Tea Partiers are fanatical about wanting the government out of their lives.  In reality, they're perfectly fine with government restrictions on our freedom so long as it furthers their evangelical Christian ideology - like banning porn, or banning gay marriage or meddling in abortion isses.  Or whatever the controversy du jour is.

This is why the Tea Party is so full of shit, and no different than any other political group fighting for their specific interests.    

- Max Fischer, Civis Mundi

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:10 | 1443847 Everybodys All ...
Everybodys All American's picture

Looks like NBC is running the Show ...

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:10 | 1443848 Jim in MN
Jim in MN's picture


Ultraman visits evacuation center

A popular TV character visited an evacuation center in the disaster-hit Fukushima Prefecture to cheer up families and children on Sunday.

The late Eiji Tsuburaya, who invented Ultraman, was from Sukagawa City in the prefecture. Staff from his Tokyo-based production firm visited the facility in Koriyama City 45 years after the character made his TV debut.

A boy who evacuated from Tomioka Town says it was fun to meet Ultraman, and he likes the way he attacks his enemies.

The boy's 36-year-old mother says she is happy, as the evacuation center does not have a place where children can play.

Monday, July 11, 2011 01:01 +0900 (JST)

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:16 | 1443895 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

The last 7.1 was described as an aftershock.  I guess the next 9.5 will be as well.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:11 | 1443857 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

Installing those security updates into the President seems to have gone smoothly today.  Only about 15 min late.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:12 | 1443865 Momauguin Joe
Momauguin Joe's picture

Somebody. please. Throw a fucking shoe.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:19 | 1443915 gookempucky
gookempucky's picture


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:22 | 1443932 karzai_luver
karzai_luver's picture

it's HIP WADER time now................

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:55 | 1444119 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:13 | 1443868 ThirdCoastSurfer
ThirdCoastSurfer's picture

My money is on Tyler's prediction that all this drama will end in no spending cuts, no tax increase but a $2.5 trillion increase in the debt limit. Victory for All!

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:18 | 1443905 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:21 | 1443921 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

Kick ze can.  Ze problem, she is sol-ved.

                    Hercule Poirot

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:36 | 1444029 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

If there are no sepnding cuts and no tax increase, the rating agencies will downgrade US debt within 5 minutes of the announcement.  The debt ceiling event is a LOSE-LOSE for the US gov.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 13:40 | 1444539 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

Of course it requires ancillary changes...  such as disregarding the rating agencies...  and letting financial institutions, for example, have wider discretion with their investments...  so long as they're with uncle sugar.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:50 | 1444096 trentusa
trentusa's picture

I know, don't get hopes up...90% prob 2.5 tril debt incr. w/ no taxes, just like Greece. Still, @ this least we'll have hopefully vigorous unscripted debate on the floor of House/Senate. Got2watch CSpan if you want to know what really happened must understand origins. Might as well just turn CNBC off. Scary how long takes to learn that once actually in markets doing real trading stocks options whatever futures, tax lien credit default swap contracts etc.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:13 | 1443869 JustPrintMoreDuh
JustPrintMoreDuh's picture

what ... no shout-outs?

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:13 | 1443871 Cone of Uncertainty
Cone of Uncertainty's picture

Ladies and gentlemen, last night Michelle allowed me to fuck her in the ass, and I thought that would be a nice seque into what I'm about to talk to you about today.

See, the American people are resilient, and have been fucked in the ass for some time and I fully expect that to continue.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:15 | 1443884 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

"I've been hearing from my Republican friends....???"

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:20 | 1443917 DeadFred
DeadFred's picture

If his lips are moving he's lying. It's a good rule to remember.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:24 | 1443945 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

I think that would be Timmy, the one balled, has been, once was, wannabe.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:26 | 1443955 PaperBear
PaperBear's picture

Yeah but all his republican friends are all dead which means he is hearing voices in his head.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:15 | 1443886 rdenner
rdenner's picture

What an arrogant bastard... 14 minutes fucking late!!



Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:16 | 1443893 the not so migh...
the not so mighty maximiza's picture
Yo we's need mo' money so we's gots ta increase our credit card limit, its da only way and shit.
Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:16 | 1443896 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:17 | 1443897 Dr Zaius
Dr Zaius's picture

You know, reading the comments here is much easier on my blood pressure than actually listening to the POS spew his lies. I get an occasional chuckle as well.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:17 | 1443899 Alcoholic Nativ...
Alcoholic Native American's picture


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:17 | 1443901 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

"We want to give our taxpayers more bang for the buck..."


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:18 | 1443903 BurningFuld
BurningFuld's picture

SSSSH!  He is explaining how to negotiate. I'm on the edge of my seat here.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:18 | 1443906 Fortunes Favor
Fortunes Favor's picture

Credit Update: Equity Markets Headed Lower As Credit Swoons @ 


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:19 | 1443912 Deepskyy
Deepskyy's picture

Kick that can DEEP damn you.  No more of this 6 months shit. 

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:20 | 1443916 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

"Resolve this issue" means kick the can down the road until after the 2012 election.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:21 | 1443919 Deepskyy
Deepskyy's picture

Austerity Bitchez!!!


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:21 | 1443920 Cone of Uncertainty
Cone of Uncertainty's picture

"Eat our peas" bitches!

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:21 | 1443922 PaperBear
PaperBear's picture

Silver took a hit during the last hour - down to $35.45/oz from $37/oz.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:21 | 1443923 Dolar in a vortex
Dolar in a vortex's picture

I wonder how all of the "smartest guy in the room" people are feeling about him now?

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:21 | 1443924 mynhair
mynhair's picture

Only journalcysts fall for this crap.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:21 | 1443925 Blano
Blano's picture

Oh God the corporate jet owner shit again.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:29 | 1443984 Bay of Pigs
Bay of Pigs's picture

I had no idea these jet owners were the cause of all the problems facing the country.

This guy sounds like a broken record.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:34 | 1444019 snowball777
snowball777's picture

The left's corollary to the Cadillac-driving welfare queen.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:22 | 1443926 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

"I'm prepared to alienate the people who elected me..."

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:25 | 1443949 karzai_luver
karzai_luver's picture

as ALWAYS with this lead from behind loser, TOO FUKIN LATE!

even those clowns know the score by now.


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:22 | 1443928 Bama
Bama's picture

Blame the oil companies and jet owners!

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:22 | 1443933 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

pablumus extraordinarii

How do I blame thee?  Let me count the ways...

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:23 | 1443934 High Plains Drifter
High Plains Drifter's picture

we will never raise taxes. read my lips...........

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 12:06 | 1444174 Silver Dreamer
Silver Dreamer's picture

It depends on the definition of "never."  Apparently, never only meant not this year.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:23 | 1443935 Deepskyy
Deepskyy's picture

Somewhere in New England, Stephen King just put a copy of Cujo through a tv.


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:24 | 1443938 Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

lettin'... gettin'... workin'... sayin'...

Why can't politicians say fucking ing?!

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 12:16 | 1444207 SoNH80
SoNH80's picture

Keepin' th' base happy. Uh-huh. Yes. Mhnh.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:24 | 1443940 Momauguin Joe
Momauguin Joe's picture

"I have bent over backwards..."

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 12:14 | 1444198 nathan1234
nathan1234's picture

Being gay he loves bending over backwards


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:24 | 1443941 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

Show us your fucking budget first! Where's the BUDGET?

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:24 | 1443943 High Plains Drifter
High Plains Drifter's picture

the problem is, that we have gridlock. can't we all just get along. its those wascally republicrats.......they are at fault......

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:24 | 1443944 gookempucky
gookempucky's picture

I didnt know the US owned any hiways.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:24 | 1443946 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

I have bent over backwards to work with my Republican friends...

(If this don't work it's not my fault.)

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:26 | 1443953 Cone of Uncertainty
Cone of Uncertainty's picture

Yep and the American people bend over forward and get ass fisted daily up to the elbow by these assclowns and banker fuck faces.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:29 | 1443974 Cone of Uncertainty
Cone of Uncertainty's picture


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:59 | 1444137 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Now just what sticks up in the air when a male bends over backwards?

Suck it, "friends."

Isn't election season fun?

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:25 | 1443947 mynhair
mynhair's picture

In other news:

TEVA shares stage sharp recovery as their anti-nausea drug flies off shelves.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:25 | 1443948 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

New phrase: "Professional Politicians"

Dad, when I grow up I want to be a...

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:27 | 1443963 the not so migh...
the not so mighty maximiza's picture

Yo Professional Politicians will do da right thin` , wOrd!

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:25 | 1443952 Ms. Erable
Ms. Erable's picture

When do we get a camera angle from behind the podium to see just how many hands this sock puppet has up its ass?


Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:26 | 1443958 shortnotgold
shortnotgold's picture

We shouldn't pay attention to what the Treasury is doing?  And let the "Professional Politicians" take care of it?  Are  you kidding me?  Did Mr. O just say that for real? 

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:29 | 1443988 I Am The Unknow...
I Am The Unknown Comic's picture

Yeah that's for reals shrtnotgold.  Apparently we here at ZH should be worried about "other stuff" in our daily lives....

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:31 | 1444005 Life of Illusion
Life of Illusion's picture

Hear that, he says average citizen does want to know shit about treasury destroying your wealth.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 12:08 | 1444180 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Hush little baby, don't you cry.

We're gonna kill you, but don't ask why.

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 12:09 | 1444183 Silver Dreamer
Silver Dreamer's picture

Yeah, the debt and loss of liberty of my children because of it shouldn't matter to me.  All hail Obama!

Mon, 07/11/2011 - 11:26 | 1443959 stant
stant's picture

leaner and meaner biatchez

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