This page has been archived and commenting is disabled.

Watch Today's 2:15 pm FOMC Press Conference Live And Interruption Free Here

Tyler Durden's picture




 

While today's 2:15 pm FOMC press conference is still some time away, it is never too late to reserve your seats: the conference will be presented below live. We will liveblog the event in the off chance Bernanke says something that may be even modestly unexpected, such as the truth.

In case anyone is still confused about what is going on:

Chairman Ben S. Bernanke will hold press briefings four times per year to present the Federal Open Market Committee's current economic projections and to provide additional context for the FOMC's policy decisions.

In 2011, the Chairman's press briefings will be held at 2:15 p.m. following FOMC decisions scheduled on April 27, June 22 and November 2. The briefings will be broadcast live on the Federal Reserve's website. For these meetings, the FOMC statement is expected to be released at around 12:30 p.m., one hour and forty-five minutes earlier than for other FOMC meetings.

The introduction of regular press briefings is intended to further enhance the clarity and timeliness of the Federal Reserve's monetary policy communication. The Federal Reserve will continue to review its communications practices in the interest of ensuring accountability and increasing public understanding.

Live link. We have picked a green frame border for obvious reasons.

 

Video clips at Ustream

Updates:

  • FED RAISES ESTIMATES FOR 2011 CORE INFLATION TO 1.3%-1.6%, WAS 1.0%-1.3% BEFORE
  • FED REDUCES GROWTH OUTLOOK FOR 2011, SEES TRANSITORY INFLATION
  • FED POLICY MAKERS SEE 3.1% TO 3.3% ECONOMIC GROWTH FOR 2011, WAS 3.4%-3.9% BEFORE
  • FED FORECASTS HEADLINE INFLATION OF 2.1% TO 2.8% THIS YEAR

The Chairsatan speaks.

Supposedly, despite the drop in the economy, Bernanke still sees strength in the employment trend.

Bernanke's voice sounds like a Stradivarious tremollo.

Bernanke remains confident he can tighten whenever needed. When the tie for tightening comes, he will consider both parts of his dual mandate. Nothing about the third mandate.

Bernanke expects Q1 GDP of under 2% but believes slowdown is
"transitory", factors are the "weather", weaker construction, and "less
momentum"

On how Bernanke's policies are destroying the middle class: we care about low inflation and attracting foreign capital to boost the dollar. Pinocchio is spinning in his grave.

What will the Fed do on surging fuel prices? A.Gasoline prices have risen quite significantly. This is a bad development (and an understatement). All of the increase in demand for oil has come from emerging economies. On supply side we have disruptions in MENA, which has driven gas prices up. All of the increase in the inflation forecast comes from the jump in gas prices. Nothing the Fed can do about surging gas prices without detailing growth. "The Fed does not print oil." But Fed will try to stop pass through costs from rising (whatever that means).

How is Fed working to create sustained job creation? A. Labor market is improving. Must make sure it is sustainable. Is encouraging to see improvement in recent months, although pace is quite slow.

Is there anything the Fed can do to prevent the public from believing higher inflation is coming? A. The inflation expectations we are worried about are medium term. In the indexed bond market see near-term inflation expectations rise significantly, but "for the most part" it is fair to say medium term expectations have not moved very much, and "indicate confidence in the Fed." In the short run can communicate what our policy is attempting to do, and what steps we are willing to take. If inflation persists, there is no substitute for action.

What will be the impact on the economic recovery when QE2 ends?  How long with the Fed continue reinvestments? A. Will complete program without tapering. End of program is unlikely to have effects on market or economy. We hope to have telegraphed what we are planning to do. We subscribe to a stock view of securities purchases, which means that what matters is not the pace of ongoing purchase, but size of portfolio of Fed holdings. The amount of securities will remain constant so we don't expect an adverse effect from halting QE2. As for ending reinvestments will base decision on evolving outlook.

QE2 appears to have been ineffective. Can you end the program in June with unemployment rate still at 9%? A. I do believe QE2 was effective: we saw that first in the financial markets: we saw increases in stock prices, and reduced spreads. You would expect that based on decades of economic data that easing financial conditions would lead to easing economic conditions [but have not]. The conclusion that QE2 has been ineffective is wrong as it did the things it set forth to do. The trade offs are getting less attractive at this point. Unclear we can get improvements in payrolls without additional inflation risk, and if we are going to do a sustainable recovery, we need to keep inflation under control.

Can Fed effectively reduce long-term unemployment? A. LT unemployment is the worst it's been in the post WWII world. More people are unemployed for over 6 months than ever. Blah Blah Blah.

Do you think the US will be downgraded? A. This event [S&P warning] will provide one more incentive for congress to resolve the fiscal US problem. It's constructive.

Isn't it possible that the Fed's policies could be providing the reason for inflation? A. We don't view our policies as different from ordinary monetary policy. Problem is chosing the appropraite path of tightening, we have lots of experience in doing so? [Oh really, how many times has the Fed actually tightened under Bernanke's control].

What do you think will happen to the dollar? A. It will eventually rebound. Next question.

Some question about Rogoff and America's imminent bankruptcy. Same worthless answers.

 

This whole conference has been a complete and utter disappointment, and a disgrace for the jouranlistic profession. All the "reporters" who were there and asked the completely irrelevant questions they did will not be forgotten.

 

- advertisements -

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.
Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:42 | 1212067 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

Instant Classic!!!

ORI

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:56 | 1212883 chistletoe
chistletoe's picture

um, it had to be ....

 

"Behind the Green Door"

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:31 | 1211769 cowdiddly
cowdiddly's picture

Step right up folks and take a peek at the Bearded lady from deep in the bowels of Zimbabwe. Watch her lips quiver with penis envy when Ron Paul asks a question.  For one small token of silver you can witness one of the most incredible oddities under the Big Top. Place your bets on if she will grow a pair.

No sir those are not strings attached to her arms and we did not use Howdy Doowdy doll. See the lifelike facial hair and those genuine ink stains under her nails? And besides hair on Howdys.....  um Benice's head would get tangled up in the rotor blades. 

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:26 | 1211771 Bastiat
Bastiat's picture

This is a pr effort by the Fed.  The effort will be aimed at convincing the public that the Fed is acting in their interest.  It would be a disaster to go hawkish at this first press conference and crash the market.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:26 | 1211774 ivars
ivars's picture

"Media: admit it, Trump forced the issue. Now, don't let the WH distract you w/the birth crt from what Bernanke says today. Stay focused, eh?"

http://twitter.com/#!/SarahPalinUSA

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:31 | 1211775 Young
Young's picture

Isn't it curious how the Nasdaq and S&P futures are near highs on the exact same day Benny's gonna give us info on the continuation of QE? Either we breakout under the assumption that the two-decade-long wealth illusion continues or the markets literally shits their pants in double tops and start the total breakdown we've long suspected. Bring out the potato chips and soda, it's gonna be a wild ride.

I'm putting on me Bruce Willis shoes (the man's a stud)

PS. I am Young.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:39 | 1211831 d00daa
d00daa's picture

Or, door #3:

Markets spasm violently for several minutes, shaking out weak longs and shorts, IV collapses and everything trades sideways.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:05 | 1211918 cosmictrainwreck
cosmictrainwreck's picture

yup....don't trade the first 2 minutes, for sure - it reverses violently. then what? like ya say..... more of the same: topping in June?

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:28 | 1211783 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

That photo reminds me of:

The Bernank & The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance

-or-

Easy Monetarist Rider

 

Both an appropro book and film for today.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:29 | 1211797 plocequ1
plocequ1's picture

He looks familiar.. Hmmmmm

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6tiHTm6nBUw

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:51 | 1211878 Problem Is
Problem Is's picture

The Bernank busts into the press conference singing:

"Got the wings of heaven on my shoes
I'm a dancin fool and I just can't lose."

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:33 | 1211805 Problem Is
Problem Is's picture

Did williambanzai7 photo shop that Bernank hair on?

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:35 | 1211810 DavidC
DavidC's picture

Brilliant photograph Tyler!

Was Ben a member of ABBA by any chance?

DavidC

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:34 | 1211814 SoNH80
SoNH80's picture

Money money money, it's a rich man's world

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:34 | 1211812 Dangertime
Dangertime's picture

We had our deflation scare in 2008, then we had our inflation up until now.

Any guess that it's time for deflation again?

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:35 | 1211819 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

In 15 Minutes, danger.

Ben's on the case.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:35 | 1211817 colonial
colonial's picture

This is all BS.  Do we think Bernank is going to say anything that differs from when he testifies on The Hill? 

No matter how tough the question is, Ben has already been briefed on what to say.  He can dismiss any serious question and there are NO FOLLOW-UP QUESTIONS  allowed. 

Readers here need to know that BEFORE Ben did his famous "aw shucks" 60 Minutes interview, he hired a team of PR pros.  They are now part of the plunge protection team.  They've been doing sinister work ever since. 

Today's presser is nothing more than a new form of Fed Jawboning.  The press and markets will ALL be parsing words and reading between the lines.  As always this will be about what's not said

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:47 | 1211853 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

WOW if that PR team for his 60 Minutes faceplant is the best they can come up with, we're fucked!

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:37 | 1211820 lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

QE3 YES WE CAN !!!!!!!

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:43 | 1211851 Problem Is
Problem Is's picture

QE4 WIN THE FUTURE!!!!!

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:54 | 1212463 Cassandra Syndrome
Cassandra Syndrome's picture

QE(n+1) to infinity and beyond with Hal9000 bitchez!!!

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:39 | 1211828 Lord Peter Pipsqueak
Lord Peter Pipsqueak's picture

""Debbie Does the Dallas Fed ?"

LOL,however I'm sure he lasted a considerable time,but withdrew after 15 minutes.....

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:42 | 1211847 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Rusty- 'Gee thats great dad....but do you think mom will buy it'?

Ben Shalom Griswold- 'Good talk, son'

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:01 | 1211863 mick_richfield
mick_richfield's picture

He's cute, but wistful.  He has that "I wish I could have been Ayn Rand's toy-boy like Alan was" kind of look.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:08 | 1211927 serotonindumptruck
serotonindumptruck's picture

Alan was hitting that?!?

http://www.aynrandsociety.org/

JFC, it looks like she was kicked in the face by a horse.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:39 | 1212056 mick_richfield
mick_richfield's picture

Alan was hitting that?!?

Um, well ... I think it was sort of .. the other way around, actually.

 

But, yes!  Isn't that something?  he got to read Atlas Shrugged in freaking manuscript!  That's why he became Saint Rand's mole inside Babylon. 

On his deathbed he will be heard to whisper, "I did it for you, Ayn.  I brought it all down."

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 11:55 | 1211883 Antifederalist
Antifederalist's picture

We run a fund and use BullionVault.  We did substantial due diligence, we believe that our numbered gold bars there are completely safe.  The link above does not tell you much about that issue.  We have an eight figure gold balance with BullionVault and are very comfortable.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:06 | 1211921 Vincent Vega
Vincent Vega's picture

This won't be a 'press conference'; it will be a dog-n-pony show. Bernake will placate the markets by saying absolutely nothing of significance. In the end there will be no change in current policy.  (jmho)  Likely talking points will be the usual: employment picking up, housing slow, inflation low, strong dollar policy, exit strategies are being considered, yada, yada, yada. Again, (jmho).

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:20 | 1211975 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

You think China will buy it?

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:09 | 1212193 Vincent Vega
Vincent Vega's picture

I think China quit buying it a while back. Which is why Ben has no choice but to monetize. If China were still an insatiable buyer then we'd sell to them. Either way, as so many have pointed out, it's just about game over. The Fed is no longer the buyer of last resort; it has become the buyer of only resort. (imho)

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:11 | 1211940 docmac324
docmac324's picture

Alas, the first real presidential address to the nation.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:22 | 1211951 plocequ1
plocequ1's picture

Wow, Those margins are really killing Amazon. Down a whole + 10. If loving high Margins is wrong, Then i don't want to be right.. Praise The lord Bernanke

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:19 | 1211970 glenlloyd
glenlloyd's picture

and now, live, we have bozo the clown for your viewing pleasure.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:32 | 1212034 dariomilano
dariomilano's picture

off air?

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:32 | 1212038 Treasure Freedom
Treasure Freedom's picture

Does the dollar have another rally left in it?? Anyone? anyone? One last hoorah?

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:35 | 1212039 Missiondweller
Missiondweller's picture

Fed still says no inflation?

Dillussional.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 15:32 | 1213122 alexanderstollznow
alexanderstollznow's picture

i realise this is a difficult concept beyond the understanding of most mortals, but when the Fed speaks of "inflation", it is referring to the CPI.  that is the inflation number the Fed mandate is applicable to.  that is the same inflation number every other CB in the world is targetting also, and at exactly the same level ie about 2%.

you may have also not noticed but US CPI is currently somewhat below that.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:44 | 1212072 Samual Adams
Samual Adams's picture

USA Number 1!   USA! USA!  

The real menace of our republic is this invisible government which like a giant octopus sprawls its slimy length over city, state and nation. Like the octopus of real life, it operates under cover of a self created screen... At the head of this octopus are the Rockefeller Standard Oil interests and a small group of powerful banking houses generally referred to as international bankers. The little coterie of powerful international bankers virtually run the United States government for their own selfish purposes. They practically control both political parties. — New York City Mayor John F. Hylan, 1922

"The New World Order will have to be built from the bottom up rather than from the top down... but in the end run around national sovereignty, eroding it piece by piece will accomplish much more than the old fashioned frontal assault." — Council on Foreign Relations member Richard Gardner, l974

Give me control of a nation's money supply, and I care not who makes its laws.

BITCHEZ!

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:22 | 1212278 JR
JR's picture

But the CFR bottom-up plan didn’t work, and now  “the menace of our republic” is trying to do it directly from the top .  The idea that the central planners could start lining up the European countries, and the North American countries and Latin American countries from  bottom up – meaning through the political system – did not work.  Ethnic differences in Europe combined with expanding economic power began to divide the Euro Zone idea.  And in North America, while the politicians rubber stamped NAFTA and blurred border restrictions and other sovereignty issues, American opposition to these political efforts has grown tremendously, stopping the central  planners from getting an immigration bill and greasing the NWO through.

So with more and more failures looming – including the global economy -  the would-be world rulers are returning to the top-down measures for a world currency and government; hence, IMF’s U.S. and Japanese analysis to put itself in a more conspicuous leadership role.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:47 | 1212096 buzlightening
buzlightening's picture

I already had 8 hours of sleep. The mumbler nothing but a dead head fed freak show. 

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:52 | 1212123 Zedge Hero
Zedge Hero's picture

Gold up to 1514 from 1507 since statement and silver .75 cents up

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:52 | 1212125 Federal Reserf
Federal Reserf's picture

Debt = wealth...  weakness = strength...  I-pads = food...    UST = gold... starvation =  diminishing quantative caloric inputs.

"Inflation" will be purged from 2nd quarter 2011edition of the Fedspeak dictionary as "depression" was many editions ago.

I'm lovin it.  Get used to it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:58 | 1212140 mendigo
mendigo's picture

live blog is very cool - should be entertaining. would be even better if you could do those "pop-ups"

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 12:59 | 1212159 oogs66
oogs66's picture

Not a single board member had the guts to vote against?  just a joke

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:04 | 1212179 Corduroy
Corduroy's picture

PLEASE please please can Ben arrive to the meeting by helicopter ? I bet he wants to , surely he does !

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:10 | 1212214 bono
bono's picture

You better use your time to watchMadrid-Barça semi-finals of the Eur campion's ligue. It should be a great game with more intrigue and excitement than watching  out for Bernanke's chopter collapse.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:16 | 1212235 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

T minus one hour til Bubble boy speaks to the peasants.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:18 | 1212241 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

I speak fluent fed and they clearly said buy precious metals and cover your silver shorts.

The silver flash crash is over. We hardly knew ye.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:37 | 1212366 Zedge Hero
Zedge Hero's picture

+1 Fluent Fed- Fucking Priceless!!

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:30 | 1212311 Jack Sheet
Jack Sheet's picture

Jim Rickards commented on the sudden inititation of these press conferences during one of his recent interviews on King World News. He made 3 points very politely, but they could be paraphrased as follows:

1. The conferences became necessary due to the tanking economy and the increasing unpopularity of the Federal Reserve both in the US and abroad, in an imitation of the ECB press conferences.

2. Nevertheless, they are a pure propaganda exercise.

3. Point 2 is ensured by the fact that the attending journalists don't know J.S. about economics, and real cognoscenti are excluded.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:42 | 1212390 JR
JR's picture

It’s like Orwell wrote the Fed’s FOMC press release.  And with Fed-approved journalists, the Ministry of Truth scenario is complete.  

 

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:29 | 1212681 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

during squawkbox this morning, liesman, et al, stated bennie had thoroughly reviewed all of the questions...

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:41 | 1212378 Sizzurp
Sizzurp's picture

These hack journalists have already been told what to ask.  How about this one:

"Mr Benanke, how did know exactly what to do when you saved us from a second great depression?" 

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:54 | 1212479 JR
JR's picture

Yes. The press conferences show the desperate straits in which the Fed finds itself.  Bernank now needs to use favorable media outlets to provide the friendly face, the caring attitude and the obfuscation of complicated issues to placate the rising concerns of the American people.

Using his biggest trick, double negatives, and vague assessments and many impertinent details, he'll begin: "You know, these things are not that easy to figure out. We've got this coming and that going... And with all of this, progess is definitely being made..."

And it will be his definition of progress, not the economic reality Americans are facing, that we will hear.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:39 | 1212379 goldenbuddha454
goldenbuddha454's picture

Wow, live blogging the FMC press conference.  If this was football ZH would be flagged for piling on, but I like it, alot!  May the minions of Bernocchio bashers unite here at 2:15 pm to protest the FED's actions and its very existence.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:43 | 1212396 augie
augie's picture

 

 

Question: why would gold and silver pop on the news that POMO is going to end?

 

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:46 | 1212399 EvlTheCat
EvlTheCat's picture

Any takers on what Ben's opening soliloquy will be?

I am guess it will go something like the following,

"We are the Octopus. You will be assimilated. Your biological and technological distinctiveness will be added to our own. Resistance is futile."

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:51 | 1212433 augie
augie's picture

i am the walrus.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:03 | 1212534 EvlTheCat
EvlTheCat's picture

Koo Koo Ka-Choo

http://youtu.be/oqNg6DIwyIY

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 15:04 | 1212913 Misstrial
Misstrial's picture

Well, from what I'm seeing, Bernanke uses botox. 

His forehead does not move neither does he have any movement around his eyes.

I don't consider this to be a vanity thing for him, but more likely than not, a tactic to further throw off examiners of his emotional and mental processes.

He doesn't want people to see him sweat-it.

~Misstrial (who has botox treatments)

 

 

 

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:44 | 1212406 optimator
optimator's picture

Chairman Bernanke, when is the next press conference scheduled.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:45 | 1212411 Piranhanoia
Piranhanoia's picture

He shall announce that from this point onward all banks are now part of the fed.  Or that he has been made king.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:46 | 1212415 El Hosel
El Hosel's picture

... At what level is the weak dollar no longer bullish for stocks? 

 

  " FREE to good home", the S&P 500.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:46 | 1212421 goldenbuddha454
goldenbuddha454's picture

1,000 threader right here at 2:15

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:52 | 1212444 Cassandra Syndrome
Cassandra Syndrome's picture

Apologies if already mentioned, but I hear rumours that these questions have been vetted for 2 days.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:00 | 1212485 El Hosel
El Hosel's picture

  No shit, and the market will rally accordingly as prescribed. Inhale to the chief.

   "in the interest of ensuring accountability and increasing public understanding"... Yeah, the public better understand "the Fed is the Market".

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:56 | 1212499 Fancy Bear
Fancy Bear's picture

I fucking hope not.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:54 | 1212483 CB
CB's picture

the vintage picture of Ben is a great example of what an aspiring elitist in his formative years looks like.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 13:56 | 1212497 Muir
Muir's picture

[1:57]

Move it shubby, I'm claiming this seat early.

No, I didn't mean to step in your shoes and yes, I brought the pop corn from home.

-

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:01 | 1212527 Muir
Muir's picture

Don't you give me no, "excuse me, mam, I didn't mean to" BS.

Jst watch where your hands go buddy if you don't want a bloody nose.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:03 | 1212536 El Hosel
El Hosel's picture

........Thats not my hand, I make no excuse.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:10 | 1212575 sharkbait
sharkbait's picture

good to see you Muir.  miss your avatar when you aren't around

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:07 | 1212543 scratch_and_sniff
scratch_and_sniff's picture

On Air! Get the pop corn ready(for choking on)

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:06 | 1212550 astartes09
astartes09's picture

I like to see the CNBC folks scratch their head every time its brought up that this has never happened before.

 

Then there is a look that shows they are just dead inside.  Much like strippers.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:09 | 1212565 sharkbait
sharkbait's picture

ok, lottery ticket time.  Bought 100 apr37 calls on TBT at .09. 

 

Wish me luck

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:47 | 1212835 sharkbait
sharkbait's picture

punched out a .10, lost about 5 bucks after the vig.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:12 | 1212572 556nato
556nato's picture

Silver up past $47.00

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:12 | 1212573 savagegoose
savagegoose's picture

my tip is  banks to invest FDIC protected  cash into treasuery,

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:10 | 1212576 baby_BLYTHE
baby_BLYTHE's picture

Cannot believe I am going to miss class to watch this...

The dollar is on its last legs, we are very near the tipping point into a Great Depression worse than the last one.

Might as well witness history.

The Bernank will eat his words.

Millions of lives world-wide hang in the balance

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:33 | 1212716 ZakuKommander
ZakuKommander's picture

Cannot believe anyone seriously considers "missing class" missing something of value.

School is even more of a game than the markets.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:35 | 1212750 baby_BLYTHE
baby_BLYTHE's picture

agreed, higher education is a bubble. Today's college degree is yesterday's High School diploma.

I am here crossing my fingers hoping the chairsatan is asked about the price of Gold/Silver.

Want to see that lip do its quiver dance

 

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:53 | 1212824 ZakuKommander
ZakuKommander's picture

Same here.  Wonder whether that's part of his "reality."  The "you people" comment confirms he's in his own little world.

This will work for you: take courses that appear worthwhile, but insiders recognize are "easy As."  Hint: follow the athletes into these.  Mix these liberally with the minimum of credible courses from your major. Great grades are thus readily achieved, you'll have plenty of time for alcohol or other extracurriculars, and you'll open the door into any post-grad or job situation you wish.  

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:44 | 1212809 au_bayitch
au_bayitch's picture

My high school class was watching till I posted this reply. The students have noticed the nervousness.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:11 | 1212578 Sutton
Sutton's picture

Mr Hilsenrath(WSJ): Mr Bernanke, your look of a bald dome, chestnut brown side hair and white beard is ,like , so cool.

Mr Bernanke: Yes Jon, Janet really digs it.

 

 

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:13 | 1212590 Lord Peter Pipsqueak
Lord Peter Pipsqueak's picture

Economy remains weak,considerable time,vigilant,rates to remain low,inflation is low,QE will resume if the economic circumstances deteriorate,POMO to manipulate the curve.

Hows that for word cloud from the upcoming farce,

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:13 | 1212592 solidsteele
solidsteele's picture

The Matrix : "we are now going to prohibit the sale of gold and silver, and while we institute these new monetary policies, please pay close attention to the space shuttle launch and royal wedding distraction we have orchestrated, and oh by the by, if you have not been brought up to speed concerning the precedence set by Arizona state legislation with regard to Miranda Rights, everything you say and do WILL be recorded and used to fuck you in the ass." http://www.azleg.gov//FormatDocument.asp?inDoc=/legtext/50leg/1r/bills/s... I bring this up because over the next few days, I want you to pay special attention to our story about gun controls as they relate to Rep. Gabrielle Giffords shooting on the day before this bill SB1061 was passed, and never mind that the judge that was shot on that same day in Jan. earlier this year also opposed the bill. all in all, just do what we say, live and act as we tell you to act, and don't question the BERNANKE with any questions of real substance.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:14 | 1212593 thedrickster
thedrickster's picture

is it just me or does the Chairsatan look jittery?

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:22 | 1212647 Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

He always does. Maybe he just deals with stage fright.

All I'm saying is that he could at once sound shaky and at the same time posess 100% confidence in his own beliefs.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:14 | 1212594 Threeggg
Threeggg's picture

Sounds nervous as hell....This is going to be a train wreck !!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:24 | 1212644 Darth Silver
Darth Silver's picture

i agree.  i am shocked how nervous he sounds.

not good.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:14 | 1212596 JR
JR's picture

It has been a long, steep slide from the words of Adam Smith to the words of Leon Trotsky: “Where the sole employer is the State, opposition means death by slow starvation. The old principle: who does not work shall not eat, has been replaced with a new one: who does not obey shall not eat.”.

From the fruits of a free enterprise supply and demand economy that created the greatest economic miracle on earth, we arrive at today’s message from the representative of the would-be world rulers.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:17 | 1212599 sbenard
sbenard's picture

I see the terrorist now! It's the Chairsatan, "Bubbles" Bernanke!!

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:15 | 1212600 ApplesConspiracy
ApplesConspiracy's picture

With all that printed money they couldn't buy this guy a teleprompter?

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:18 | 1212607 RichardENixon
RichardENixon's picture

He needs to start using teleprompters.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:16 | 1212610 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Tyler put funny pop ups in his press conference like mtv used to do.

It would go viral and the next time bernanke speaks everyone in the world would tune in to ZHTV

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:27 | 1212617 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

 

 

Ben shit his pants.

I'm serious. Look at him.

He either shit or sharted badly.

He's a non-CONfident man.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:19 | 1212625 UpShotKnotHoleGrable
UpShotKnotHoleGrable's picture

# of viewers is going to take out the dow...maybe even all time.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:29 | 1212629 Zero Govt
Zero Govt's picture

CNBC staffers have been winding up to this event today like it was a 10 minute countdown to Nasca... yet we all know Bernank will be as informative as a dead duck

He's just kicked off with a stream of broad meaningless generalisations, trigger words to hed fuk anyone gullible enough to believing he's doing good for the wider economy, when in fact all he does all day is buy up shitty debt from Wall Street and Washington bailing out his insolvent parasites bum chums

A short chubby crone from The Parasite Club holds a press conference... what are we supposed to learn from this beats me!

We await CNBC staffers turn Benny dross into something entertaining and the seismic event they were guffing about. Meanwhile Ric Santelli asked the only hard question on display today, "get some pensioners in the room to ask Bernanke why he's ruining their savings?" ...nice one Ricky, a slice of reality in a room full of starry eyed retards 

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:23 | 1212633 tallen
tallen's picture

Lol, inflation remains subdued.Inflation should decline. LOL.

Bernanke must really be smoking some really high level crack.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:21 | 1212637 crzyhun
crzyhun's picture

Blah oh blah oh blah oh blah.....repeat ad infinitum

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:21 | 1212638 mt paul
mt paul's picture

12,657 viewers

and zero hedge 

is not even serving pie ....

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:24 | 1212639 IEVI
IEVI's picture

Why does he always sound like he is on the verge of a nervous breakdown?

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:26 | 1212660 El Hosel
El Hosel's picture

Nervous?....... Llying under oath?.....No sweat.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:22 | 1212641 Re-Discovery
Re-Discovery's picture

THIS committee considers the FED to be 'transitory'.

He just said it boys.  Fed doesnt see inflation.  QE3 by August.

Buy PMs.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:33 | 1212662 Re-Discovery
Re-Discovery's picture

BTW, people OBVIOUSLY got these and FOMC remarks at about 11:30 this morning.

Check all relevant indexes.  Game will not change.  Dont play (or know their moves.)  There is an inside and an outside.  Only safe way to be an outsider is in real assets.

Inflation.  Fleece.  Inflation. Fleece. Inside information.  Fleece.

Buy PMs.

Seriously folks.  This might be the easiest "trading" opportunity of our lifetimes.  Read ZH for REAL-TIME actionable info updates and be long and strong PMs.  We know these people are serial thinkers, so profit from it.  The more people who take the other side of Bernanke's madness, the faster this BS system will change.

 

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:34 | 1212719 Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

Yep. The endgame looks like hyperinflation.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:24 | 1212642 gbresnahan
gbresnahan's picture

Bernank, When will you restore the value of the US dollar back to what it was?

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:48 | 1212823 Zero Govt
Zero Govt's picture

he's answered that one already... the Dollars knocking on the lid to the sewer at record lows and Benny still says the world rates the "status of the Dollar" ....you can't get any more delusional than a Govt crone who's never stepped out of his ivory tower since his assigned career path from his ivy league school 

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:25 | 1212643 Threeggg
Threeggg's picture

Do we get fluffer questions or stumpers ? The questions are not supposed to be canned but we will see.

I say the media has been warned ...........

I cannot believe how nervous he sounds, almost on the verge of crying.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:25 | 1212648 AldoHux_IV
AldoHux_IV's picture

Here's what this moron doesn't understand: his so-called mandates and metrics he looks at only show a portion (a very subjective one) of the overall health of an economy.  These have nothing to do with unemployment and the whole 'price stability' thing is a carte blanche attack on the middle and lower classes who are currently suffering as a result of previous and current policies.  In the vain pursuit of so called price stability, the imbalances within the world and domestic economy continue to grow bigger.  Price stability is a joke concept-- prices move based on many exterior factors and to try to control prices through supply of money or other Keynesian/supply side efforts only work to benefit the few at the cost of many-- in other words, affordablility or in this case purchasing power is relative and so this centrally planned effort is no better than social class genocide at its finest with no real benefit to the overall real economy.

It hasn't worked before and it sure has hell ain't going to work now.  We must remove the economy of its cancer i.e. the federal reserve and ill-informed unethical policymakers.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:48 | 1212845 Zero Govt
Zero Govt's picture

oh no Benny knows what shit state the economy is in, otherwise he wouldn't have rolled out the QE pumps and wouldn't be knowingly fabricating unemployment, employment and inflation statistics ...why else do you think he's almost no hair left?

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:23 | 1212650 TomJoad
TomJoad's picture

He sure has some shifty eyes.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:30 | 1212686 Don Birnam
Don Birnam's picture

"Would you buy a used car from this man ?"

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:23 | 1212651 jefe95
jefe95's picture

He is pulling numbers completely out of thin air.  The numbers have no basis in reality.

 

Inflation? GDP growth?  Unemployment?  wow.

 

Oh and commodity prices are rising because of "geopolitical instability and rising demand, among other factors".  Wonder what those other factors are?

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:23 | 1212655 ASavageTrader
ASavageTrader's picture

Wanted to puke when I saw Steve LIES(wo)man

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:26 | 1212656 equity_momo
equity_momo's picture

My computer just shut down on me trying to play the streaming video of this stupid bearded fucktarde. How he says this stuff with a straight face is beyond me. Oh well , hes making gold and silver rally , so party on Ben.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:25 | 1212663 AldoHux_IV
AldoHux_IV's picture

No matter what this idiot says it's all a slow and 'orderly' form of default and in the meantime many unknowing victims will lose any hope or prospects for prosperity unless we take charge and control of our own economic destiny-- remove the facade and illusion that these asshole policymakers care about you in any way-- to them you're just another number in the game of ponzi.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:28 | 1212665 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Here are the first of the submitted 2 day in advance 'questions' that the Bernank will now hit out of the park (does he have crib notes, too?).

 

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:27 | 1212666 thedrickster
thedrickster's picture

Commodity Prices = Geo-political factors + robust global growth

The chairsatan is channeling More Critical Thinking Wanted the fuckhead (aka David Gilmore).

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:28 | 1212672 Lord Peter Pipsqueak
Lord Peter Pipsqueak's picture

Benny's sounds so nervous he comes across as if he is yodelling his answers,come on man get a grip,just lie straight!!!

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:26 | 1212673 Where-is-my-mind.
Where-is-my-mind.'s picture

So inflation on what we buy is OK, but not what we make. Their madate is for us to become poorer and poorer.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:26 | 1212674 Kassandra
Kassandra's picture

WTF is accommodative policy? Help me out here.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:57 | 1212889 Zero Govt
Zero Govt's picture

bend over you short chubby crone and do whatever we (Wall Street and Washington) want

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:29 | 1212676 medicalstudent
medicalstudent's picture

question 1:

 

we want you to spend more on defense.

 

we want you to accept toilet paper dollar and bump up exports.

 

we want you to build more worthless homes to overglut the supply even more.

 

not listening to me, he who owns and control life, will result in its extermination.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:29 | 1212677 earlthepearl
earlthepearl's picture

He sounds nervous as fuck

Maybe he has a fucking sniper on him if he goes off the reservation....

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:26 | 1212678 Fox-Scully
Fox-Scully's picture

First question elicited his response saying weather had an effect---HaHaHa

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:27 | 1212679 El Hosel
El Hosel's picture

  Dual mandate..... Lock him in a room with Barney Frank until the dollar rallies.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:30 | 1212685 medicalstudent
medicalstudent's picture

question 1:

 

we want you to spend more on defense.

 

we want you to accept toilet paper dollar and bump up exports.

 

we want you to build more worthless homes to overglut the supply even more.

 

not listening to me, he who owns and control life, will result in its extermination.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:30 | 1212687 medicalstudent
medicalstudent's picture

question 1:

 

we want you to spend more on defense.

 

we want you to accept toilet paper dollar and bump up exports.

 

we want you to build more worthless homes to overglut the supply even more.

 

not listening to me, he who owns and control life, will result in its extermination.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:31 | 1212689 GOSPLAN HERO
GOSPLAN HERO's picture

Liesman sucks-up to Ben.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:29 | 1212691 thedrickster
thedrickster's picture

Steve Liesman just messed himself.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 15:02 | 1212908 Zero Govt
Zero Govt's picture

he's been wetting himself every day on the lead up actually ...he simply cannot get over asking the Chairman God a soft patsy question live on TV ....you can almost cut the saliva in Liesmans mouth with a knife (let's not picture his pants!)

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:31 | 1212694 Lord Peter Pipsqueak
Lord Peter Pipsqueak's picture

Oh jesus,LiesMan!!!Pass the sickbag.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:31 | 1212695 PAUL LEO FASO
PAUL LEO FASO's picture

Bernanke should be making this press conference in an orange jump suit with handuffs.

Time to go on the offensive and call these people out for what they really are.

Ready to come out of your coma?  GOOD PLEASE READ THIS;

http://www.zerohedge.com/print/365866

 

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:31 | 1212696 equity_momo
equity_momo's picture

hahaha steve liesman in there with some butt kissing and a nice little blowback from benny. how cute.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:29 | 1212698 Astute Investor
Astute Investor's picture

Glad to see that Bernanke is on a first-name basis with Steve LIESman...

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:31 | 1212699 Shermanium
Shermanium's picture

"lower defense spending"

huh?

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:31 | 1212700 Piranhanoia
Piranhanoia's picture

visibly shaking even with pre planned fluff questions.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:29 | 1212702 Don Birnam
Don Birnam's picture

"Thanks, Steve."

Ben and Liesman. First-name basis.

Need we know more ?

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:30 | 1212704 AldoHux_IV
AldoHux_IV's picture

It's like watching Hitler surrounded by his supporters-- is anyone really buying the fact that these asshole reporters are asking real questions?

I think Liesman just wet himself at the opportunity to ask Benocide a lolly pop of a question.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:30 | 1212705 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Have another lunch, LIESman. And another ginormous piece of pie and cake. I'm sure there are leftovers.

Hey, everyone, Bernank said he is not responsible for the falling USD, and that it's Timmay's fault!

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:32 | 1212706 Misean
Misean's picture

I  just want to know what he does to get rid of the ink stains. That shit's a bitch to get out.

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:30 | 1212708 Veekay23
Veekay23's picture

Leismann and Ben are bum chumps

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:30 | 1212709 digitlman
digitlman's picture

DOUCHEBAG!

Wed, 04/27/2011 - 14:33 | 1212710 ShowMeTheTime
ShowMeTheTime's picture

Liesman had to kiss ass to start...unreal!

 

At least he asked a tough question...

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!