What Gets An SAC Portfolio Manager $1.3 MM? Lots Of Insider Trading, Banging Hookers And Running Around Naked While High On Shrooms

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Tue, 06/07/2011 - 21:45 | 1349323 ILikeBoats
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Perhaps the "golden handcuffs" were something more than a metaphor ...

Wed, 06/08/2011 - 01:01 | 1349712 FreedomGuy
FreedomGuy's picture

Now that was good, lol!

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 21:43 | 1349331 Blano
Blano's picture

I'd take that gig.

Wed, 06/08/2011 - 05:12 | 1349924 malikai
malikai's picture

I've just applied. If you get in my way, you're dead.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 21:43 | 1349332 AUD
AUD's picture

Shit, I'm in the wrong game.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 21:45 | 1349338 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

Fucking rookie error, ingesting more, when the first batch hasn't been digested.

Stevie, scrapping the bottom of the barrel with this dude.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:23 | 1349450 bonddude
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Spent half the night picking holographic fruit off the wall. Yep i've seen rookies before.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 23:00 | 1349532 Village Idiot
Village Idiot's picture

Rookie moves can also be the best of times. I remeber running around with my best buddies in a 1974 LTD convertible. We pulled up on the bluffs next to Hoag Hospital and howled like wolves under the methane gas blowoff tower. The flames blowing out of the tower, moon full in the sky...very animalistic.Ran in to some girls. They dug the whole wolf thing. Good times.

Wed, 06/08/2011 - 10:02 | 1350556 RF
RF's picture

V.I., you are dating yourself, talking about the bluffs at Hoag. You old enough to remember the Rendezvous?

Best regards,


Tue, 06/07/2011 - 23:31 | 1349589 ToNYC
ToNYC's picture


Stevie knows to take the sacraments in the church of the woods and water..woulda' saved a good night...hookers? paying for sex is a dog's game. The guy's just not experienced, that's all folks.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 21:45 | 1349339 metalsman22
metalsman22's picture

Ah, just like the good ole days ;)

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 21:48 | 1349344 Barb Dwire
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Sign me up!

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 21:51 | 1349347 Irrational Exub...
Irrational Exuberance's picture

Where do I apply!

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 21:53 | 1349352 JLee2027
JLee2027's picture

"Boxers and Hookers"

Now that's a classic.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:03 | 1349398 Cheesy Bastard
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If you think she can wrestle, you should see her box.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 23:19 | 1349575 Problem Is
Problem Is's picture

"Boxers and Hookers"

Stevie Cohen says now that's classy...

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 23:27 | 1349586 rockraider3
rockraider3's picture

That reminds me of Model and Bottles... the video that the limp dick investment banker put out.


Tue, 06/07/2011 - 21:53 | 1349353 King Durian
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He should just at this point retire and go to Thailand where he can blend in with the other monger farangs. That way he can run around with 2 hookers in Pattaya on his arm on LSD and his career won't be fazed. Hell, it might even help for a PR tool.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 21:58 | 1349376 Spitzer
Spitzer's picture

I am on the way to Pattaya actually.

Its a really nice place. 30 golf courses, big shopping malls,


Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:09 | 1349406 sneering nihilist
sneering nihilist's picture

big shopping malls = nice place.


now THAT is sarcasm! well done!

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:34 | 1349465 gwar5
gwar5's picture

The Pattaya miracle mile....

They have a lot more than 30 rounds of golf in Pattaya, Spitz. You know the drill. Make sure there's no junk in the front first so your putter doesn't go all wobbly during the backswing. Have fun.


Almost forgot -- my avatar is a picture of the elephants one hour above Chang Mai, Thailand.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 23:55 | 1349636 williambanzai7
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Just make sure you get your Sois straight. And I do mean straight.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 21:53 | 1349356 Goldtoothchimp09
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NEVER hire a trader that can't handle his drugs!  geesh

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 21:56 | 1349368 yabyum
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Sounds like my entire 20's minus the big buxs.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:23 | 1349442 Ben Fleeced
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The homeless are not allowed in the Lincoln Tunnel. Sign says no pedestrians. Ooops. Ended up being banged by a Tennessee art dealer in the Holiday Inn on West 54th. THAT"S my 20's. This shit is nothin'. Clean black leather with a McDonalds straw. Bitchessssss!

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 21:52 | 1349366 Manthong
Manthong's picture

I need someone to "sort out" my expenses, too.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 21:55 | 1349367 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

a slight twist to hookers and cocaine.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:01 | 1349383 King Durian
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Enjoy! Have some durian for me while you're there!

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:01 | 1349392 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Psylosiben bithez!

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:31 | 1349481 Ben Fleeced
Ben Fleeced's picture

everything tastes better on a ritz.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:02 | 1349395 ugly_avatar_Muir
ugly_avatar_Muir's picture

Freeman, who said his contract at SAC Capital guaranteed him a minimum compensation of $1.3 million.

And now you know the mystery behind the hedge fund facade: insider trading, lots of drugs, occasionally running around a major metropolis in your boxers, and hookers. The rest is the daily commute.

___ Is this a fucking great Country, or what!!? _
Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:32 | 1349472 Chuck Walla
Chuck Walla's picture

I'd do it for half that.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:36 | 1349484 Ben Fleeced
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Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:03 | 1349400 holdbuysell
holdbuysell's picture

Forget about confidence in the markets, we have a much larger sociological problem to worry about.

Truly sad individual.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:37 | 1349489 Ben Fleeced
Ben Fleeced's picture

STFU Puritan! Move.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 23:15 | 1349569 holdbuysell
holdbuysell's picture

Like I said...a sociological problem...I didn't even have to cue you, and you responded in spades.

Much thanks.

Wed, 06/08/2011 - 00:59 | 1349711 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

Interesting what response a clear-truthy statemement will bring eh holdbuy? 

You puritan you! ;-)


Wed, 06/08/2011 - 05:14 | 1349926 swamp
swamp's picture

What's also sad is that so many think degrading themselves is cool. 

What ever happened to dignity?

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:11 | 1349409 Caviar Emptor
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It's a proven formula, don't mess with it! It's what made this country great. 

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:15 | 1349423 gwar5
gwar5's picture

Bang Dai Ho: I Immune too. Took shots. I swear under oath Noah Freeman is great big Weiner.



Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:27 | 1349453 The Rock
The Rock's picture


Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:48 | 1349519 Ben Fleeced
Ben Fleeced's picture


mems boi! Good on ya!

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:13 | 1349425 I am a Man I am...
I am a Man I am Forty's picture

this guy was partying his ass off and is acting like he is one of the innocent victims of Zack Galifianakis

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:13 | 1349426 Conceptwizard
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"America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves."
Abraham Lincoln

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:16 | 1349433 holdbuysell
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And thus my comments above...sociologically, we're degenerating from within.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:56 | 1349531 Ben Fleeced
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Yes. Everything we are experiencing has NEVER happened before. END OF THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT. Save my chidren, oh my sick children save them so my family name can survive.

Epic fail!!!!!!

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 23:17 | 1349572 holdbuysell
holdbuysell's picture

Yes, history (nearly) repeats itself. What's your point?

Wed, 06/08/2011 - 05:20 | 1349927 swamp
swamp's picture

Rome is burning (so is dignity) and he gets back slapped by all the common (male) sluts.

Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:19 | 1349440 Itsalie
Itsalie's picture

"And now you know the mystery behind the hedge fund facade: insider trading, lots of drugs, occasionally running around a major metropolis in your boxers, and hookers. The rest is the daily commute."


That is the main reason (apart from tax evasion) why the hedgies are all volunteers in their Asian outposts HK and Singapore now, edge of the empire, Bang cock, Manila and Jakarta all beckon, within 2 hours from a really good time, even the FBI folks cannot resist the cheap and good massage joints (no pun), anonymity assured. Someone once chanced across a group of farlangs comprising hedgies hosted by squiddies fixers, and looked over by some secret agents who themselves could not resist frolicking naked in some foam parties with an entire harem of naked local girls in one of these seedy cities in the far east. So in case you need to know who hedgies or computers makes decisions during asian trading hours...





Tue, 06/07/2011 - 22:31 | 1349479 Chuck Walla
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Tell ya' what, having hung around Bangkok, those girls smell funny.

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