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Will Goldman COO Gary Cohn Face Consequences For Committing Perjury Before The FCIC?

Tyler Durden's picture


Christine Harper, Michael Moore and Bob Ivry have been quite busy today. After poring through the lifetime legacy project of their late colleague Mark Pittman, the trio may have just made a discovery that in a non-banana republic could be enough to at least force a special hearing into whether Goldman COO Gary Cohn committed perjury while testifying to the FCIC on June 30. The culprit: Goldman's (ab)use of the discount window not once, not twice, but five times. Well everyone else was doing it, especially Goldman's insolvent peers like JPM, Merrill Lynch, Bear Stearns, Lehman Brothers, Bank of America, Wachovia, UBS, Credit Suisse and, well, everyone else. So what's wrong with that? Here's what: "Goldman Sachs President and Chief Operating Officer Gary D. Cohn told the Financial Crisis Inquiry Commission June 30 that “we used it one night at the request of the Fed to make sure our systems were linked with their systems, and it was for a de minimis amount of money.” Peter J. Wallison, a member of the Financial Crisis Inquiry Commission, then asked, “you never had to use it after that?” “No, and as I said, we used it on the Fed’s request,” Cohn replied. Alas, that is a lie. And last time we checked, lying to Congress under oath is not quite the right the way to conduct God's work (and yes, a perfectly innocuous "I don't recall" ala David Sokol from his CNBC interview would have sufficed). Alas no: Goldman just had to demonstrate how very immune from the legal process it is, by "risking" its credibility and reputation with the assumption that it is either never wrong, or, like Warren Buffett, that it can never be caught doing wrong. Well, it just was.

More from Bloomberg:

“During the crisis, we tested our systems, including accessing the discount window; the amounts involved were de minimis, and the testing was routine,” Michael DuVally, a spokesman for New York-based Goldman Sachs, said today in an e- mailed statement. “The fact that we tested the system to insure our procedures worked smoothly was made known to senior executives. Routine tests thereafter were considered part of the normal course of business.”

Goldman Sachs and Morgan Stanley (MS) were the largest and second-largest U.S. securities firms until Sept. 21, 2008, when they both won the Federal Reserve’s approval to convert to bank holding companies. The conversion took place about a week after Lehman Brothers Holdings Inc., which was then the fourth-biggest securities firm, filed the biggest bankruptcy in U.S. history.

Congress assigned the FCIC to determine the causes of the financial crisis. The panel released a report in January, along with a 545-page book.

We are confident that the corrupt "representatives" (of Wall Street interests) in Congress will get right on sending out a subpoena to Cohn asking him to explain why he lied under oath. Then again, since this act was nowhere near as criminal as Meredith Whitney telling the sad truth about America's insolvency to the broader population, we feel our confidence waning... waning...


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Thu, 03/31/2011 - 16:50 | 1122856 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

No, and I have not even read the article yet!


EDIT: Just read it, still NO!

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 16:58 | 1122902 JonNadler
JonNadler's picture

Anybody have a summary of the findings that even a moron like Jon Nadler can understand

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 21:43 | 1123732 metastar
metastar's picture

Congress is a bunch of pussies, derelict in their duties.

They don't even hold the president accountable for his illegal declaration of kinetic military action (i.e. WAR). They give their power of the purse to the private central bank. They are dangerous given their contempt for the American people.

But hey, we can't get too angry at them. They simply follow the orders and talking points emanating from their corrupted parties. And oh what a PARTY it is, all at the expense of the public.

Like I said, ... PUSSIES!

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:31 | 1123015 JonNadler
JonNadler's picture

Didn't Lloyd tell Congress the same thing, that Goldman had used the window only once to test it? The day the testified before Levin about the shitty deal?

So he perjured himself too

Fri, 04/01/2011 - 00:10 | 1124076 rocker
rocker's picture

Now your talking my stuff. Lloyd Blankfein and Neel Kashkari surely belong in Jail with the rest of the banksters. 

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 18:09 | 1123112 Holodomor2012
Holodomor2012's picture

Had he confessed the truth at the time the result would have been catastrophic.  Although it ran counter to every fiber in his being this small white lie bought the country the time it needed to stablize the recovery.  He is a hero of epic proportion.  Someone plant him a statue in Tel Aviv next to Pollard.


btw, free Pollard.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 21:53 | 1123770 tom a taxpayer
tom a taxpayer's picture

Will Goldman COO Gary Cohn Face Consequences For Committing Perjury Before The FCIC?

No, Gary Cohn will replace GE's Jeff Immelting-Nuclear-Reactor on the President’s Council on Jobs and Competitiveness.

Fri, 04/01/2011 - 01:44 | 1124205 Harlequin001
Harlequin001's picture

GS shareholders can pay, they did after all, benefit from his lying...

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 16:49 | 1122857 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

Good catch. However, the squid is the law.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 16:53 | 1122881 Thomas
Thomas's picture

No way, Dude. He will certainly get a fine.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:57 | 1123072 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

A fine bottle of wine perhaps.

Fri, 04/01/2011 - 01:45 | 1124207 Harlequin001
Harlequin001's picture

No way dude, shareholders get the fine. He gets the bonus at an advantageous tax rate...

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:18 | 1122986 Widowmaker
Widowmaker's picture

...until the swamp is drained.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 18:49 | 1123198 Mach1513
Mach1513's picture

Squid is also fish bait.

Lloyd on a hook.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 16:49 | 1122859 SilverFiend
SilverFiend's picture

If the federal government has the time to prosecute Roger Clemens and Barry Bonds for lying under oath.......

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 16:54 | 1122877 Horatio Beanblower
Horatio Beanblower's picture

panem et circenses

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 16:55 | 1122880 leathaface
leathaface's picture

+1 that was the first thing i thought of.  but RC and BB affect people's lives more than this fucker (or so they think)

Fri, 04/01/2011 - 01:46 | 1124209 Harlequin001
Harlequin001's picture

Do Roger Clemens and Barry Bonds buy US government debt?

Lloyd does...

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 16:53 | 1122868 Ruffcut
Ruffcut's picture

"bailiff, wack his pee pee!"

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:22 | 1122871 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

"Thou shalt not take the name of the LLOYD thy SQUID in vain; for the LLOYD will not hold him guiltless that taketh HIS name in vain..."

Exodus 20:7

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:08 | 1122874 bob_dabolina
bob_dabolina's picture

Ok, ok you got him

He'll get:

30 days of house arrest and a $50 fine.

30 days probation to be served concurrently with his house arrest.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 18:53 | 1123212 Mach1513
Mach1513's picture

30 days off for God-like behavior

fine to be paid by FRB criminal activity facility

Fri, 04/01/2011 - 01:51 | 1124211 Harlequin001
Harlequin001's picture

and no more chocolate for at least a week....

Naughty Lloyd, have another bonus...

and don't fuckin' do it again...

until we ask you...

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 16:53 | 1122879 Traianus Augustus
Traianus Augustus's picture

I am pretty sure that there was/will be a covert directive sent out from the WH to prove without a shadow of a doubt that Mr. Cohn is innocent of all future charges.   After all didn't they already say we shouldn't count what happened in the past?!?!

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:32 | 1123011 DeadFred
DeadFred's picture

Rule #1- The banks control the government, not the other way around.  In some ways I hope he gets away with it because of last time.  Remember, they tried this last year?  Filed charges and the bottom dropped out of the market?  Or the bottom was dropped out of the market.  The paranoid side of me (getting bigger every day) imagines the GS lawyers telling the government lawyers on May 5th "You're making a mistake here.  Tell your masters to pay attention to what happens tomorrow afternoon, then we'll talk again".  When did GS get their rediculous little fine and when did the market shake off the head and shoulders formation and start rising again.  That paranoid part of me has always thought QEII was a bribe for GS and friends to forgo the fortune they would make on the standard tank-and-buy operation on the market in July and August.  Do you think the Dems would own the senate still if the Dow was at 8000 in November?  Not that it matters it's just crooks of another flavor.  Sorry for the rant, I just hate thieves.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 16:55 | 1122882 Bill D. Cat
Bill D. Cat's picture

The devil made him do it .

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 16:54 | 1122884 leathaface
leathaface's picture

Can they back-date their statements to congress, like they do their stock options?

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 18:30 | 1123154 glenlloyd
glenlloyd's picture

You mean like they did at Countrywide?

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 18:57 | 1123217 Mach1513
Mach1513's picture

Amend statements - done all the time - correct errors - nothing wrong here

doing Yahweh's work

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 16:55 | 1122889 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

There is more of a chance TD will face jail time for asking that question than the Squid COO will for felony perjury.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 16:59 | 1122895 Sweet Chicken
Sweet Chicken's picture

Burn that mother fucker at the stake.


Edit: Bitchez

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:00 | 1122898 mrdenis
mrdenis's picture



Forgive them for they know not what they do


Thu, 03/31/2011 - 16:58 | 1122899 flowerguy
flowerguy's picture

all he has to do is prove he was willfully ignorant at the time of the statement.

That just means some new "system" did not report the sources off all borrowed funds to all the right people :)

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:09 | 1122943 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Our information systems failed us. We will set up a task force to study the issue and improve corporate communication so that the right people have the right knowledge available to them. We are humbled by this error, but will learn from this incident. We wish we never made mistakes but we are only human.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:58 | 1123068 JPG101
JPG101's picture

GS might even get taxpayers to pick up the tab for improving their communication system?

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:00 | 1122900 Horatio Beanblower
Horatio Beanblower's picture

"Ron Paul on Bloomberg Mar 31 2011 ..END THE FED!" -


Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:00 | 1122906 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

Gary Cohn will take on the position of OCFO.


Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:00 | 1122908 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

Some people believe that Bernanke is God, in which case lying to Congress is permissible...

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:10 | 1122914 Josh Randall
Josh Randall's picture

This is our window of opportunity - just like Capone had his achilles heel with taxes, we have this DOUCHE if we want him. Lets see if the political will exists yet 

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 18:05 | 1123099 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

What the fuck is this "we?" Or the fallacy of political will? That shit is all political theater to mesmerize the rubes.

As George Carlin said, "They have a club and you ain't in it!"


Thu, 03/31/2011 - 21:15 | 1123662 VeryDumbMoney
VeryDumbMoney's picture

"We" lmao.  It's "them" and "us" - it's a good idea to keep it in mind.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:02 | 1122917 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

He is goldman sachs so congress will do nothing. They all need campaign contributions. I am reminded of the song "If I Had a Rocket Launcher."

The little people need to take matters into their own hands if we cant depend on authoritah.

Cmon. There has got to be someone relatively healthy with a terminal diagnosis out there somewhere. Al Queda? Are you all talk? Didnt we hear something about a fatwa against bankers? Now is the time to make amends for that tower thingy.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:03 | 1122921 augie
augie's picture

I'm sure he will get a stern talking to. Very "strong words" will be used, it will not be pretty.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:06 | 1122922 Shameful
Shameful's picture

Consequences in the form of a promotion and bonus?

We don't have laws in this country. We have a set of rules that are enforced on the proles to keep them in line. The master class is immune. They could eat babies in front of CONgress and the only comment would be "Are you going to finish that?". Then Kudlow would go on and talk about how baby eating will drive the economy as the increased need of new babies will create a booming market in doctors.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:06 | 1122925 Careless Whisper
Careless Whisper's picture

We lost money on Abacus.


Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:05 | 1122928 bingaling
bingaling's picture

Wow, maybe they will impeach him. He will be the first coo to ever be impeached . Impeach definition: a horrible stain in history books resembling the color peach.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:07 | 1122933 anony
anony's picture

Do chickens have lips?

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:14 | 1122934 baby_BLYTHE
baby_BLYTHE's picture

Ron Paul on CSPAN. Takes Questions from Callers. 

Est. Running Time: 40 min

Part 1:

Part 2:

Part 3:

Part 4:

Cliff(s): First 3 mins part 1, his basic economic thesis/forecast going forward 

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:06 | 1122935 benevolous
benevolous's picture

I guess this means ZH hasn't found evidence of substantial use of the discount window by GS, though it has found evidence that GS used it more than once, including 2 times for $1 million each.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:30 | 1123006 AN0NYM0US
AN0NYM0US's picture

ask Barry Bonds, he understands that it's not what you lie about, it's the lie.   Of course a professional ball player accused of lying to congressional committee on the critical issue of steroid use in Americas' national pass time is on a completely different level than this petty matter.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 18:10 | 1123111 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Bonds is nothing more than the next outsider to get roasted in order to toss a little red-meat to the "tough on crime" crowd.

(Martha Stewart all over again)

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:19 | 1122979 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

CONgreff critters are cheap hookers.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 18:12 | 1123118 One_Eyed_Pony
One_Eyed_Pony's picture

I thought Goldman was buying the US Treasury, not those old open mouthed prostitutes on Capital Hill?

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 19:00 | 1123228 Mach1513
Mach1513's picture

Is there a difference?

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:14 | 1122956 plocequ1
plocequ1's picture

Phony left against phony right. Yawn!!  Bring back Balloon boy

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:13 | 1122959 flowerguy
flowerguy's picture

hmmm... 2 year old paper.

One more nail in the USD coffin ...driven in by those behind the fed.

Part of the overal plan to tank the USD so they can replace it / control it.

Those who own the real assets...will make the rules going forward.

Hold your physical tight.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:15 | 1122961 zaknick
zaknick's picture

When will you peons learn your station? You -the American middle class- idiotically traded your properity for the 666 bankster empire? You are nothing and this shall be crystal clear to all soon!


Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:14 | 1122962 flowerguy
flowerguy's picture

hmmm... 2 year old paper.

One more nail in the USD coffin ...driven in by those behind the fed.

Part of the overal plan to tank the USD so they can replace it / control it.

Those who own the real assets...will make the rules going forward.

Hold your physical tight.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 18:19 | 1123134 New_Meat
New_Meat's picture

dude, that's a four-bagger.  u might have a tie for most.  come forward and get your prize!

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:19 | 1122987 Big Al
Big Al's picture

It all depends upon the definition of "use."

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:25 | 1122995 Logans_Run
Logans_Run's picture

Rather like Charlie Brown once said "'s like peeing in a dark suit, it gives you a warm feeling but no one notices."

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:26 | 1122999 Dollar Bill Hiccup
Dollar Bill Hiccup's picture

Hi Dave. My name is Bubba and we'll be sharing this cozy little cell together ...

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:34 | 1123012 AN0NYM0US
AN0NYM0US's picture

Hi Dave, my name is Sergey. You remember me don't you...Sergey Aleynikov?  Does that ring a bell Dave?

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:32 | 1123008 citta vritti
citta vritti's picture

Naah. Now, lying to Congress about cheating in baseball. That's serious stuff. Just ask Roger, and even he's not worried.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:29 | 1123009 vast-dom
vast-dom's picture

there ain't gonna be no justice people.

let's move on to more pressing news out of Japan:


Yo Tyler get cracking on Japan hell, would ya!?!? These banksters ain't gonna pay.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:30 | 1123010 UP4Liberty
UP4Liberty's picture

It doesn't matter if he lied.

GS is untouchable by any government entity - BECAUSE GS OWNS THE GOVERNMENT.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:55 | 1123057 PicassoInActions
PicassoInActions's picture


GS ( goldmnites and jopamites ) are the Government!

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 17:43 | 1123037 Garbage Can Ray
Garbage Can Ray's picture

This is Gary D. Cohn. I am the #2 over at "tha Squid." I don't give a fuck about perjury or the legal system in general. Got it? End of story. Move along to Gawker and Perez Hilton, you fucking peasants. 


Thu, 03/31/2011 - 18:10 | 1123110 NidStyles
NidStyles's picture

Of course not. You can only perjure yourself if you are a baseball star being investigated for steroid abuse. I thought everyone knew that.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 19:11 | 1123259 cosmictrainwreck
cosmictrainwreck's picture

maybe we can get L-l-l-loyd on "subornation of perjury", a concept first made famous in the Clinton impeachment maneuvers, if I recall

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 18:14 | 1123122 israhole
israhole's picture

Another dirtbag "Chosen One". Who'd have guessed it?

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 18:25 | 1123144 Mr C-E-O
Mr C-E-O's picture

absolutely nothing will come of this

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 18:38 | 1123171 glenlloyd
glenlloyd's picture

I'm not convinced that this will be overlooked, pergury still seems to be something semi-enforced, probably because it's one of the most difficult to overlook, and now with webnet everyone can find it.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 19:56 | 1123429 Forgiven
Forgiven's picture

The rule of law went the way of the dinosaurs.  It's eat or be eaten now. 

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 19:07 | 1123251 tony bonn
tony bonn's picture

to answer the question of the article, perjury charges are only for the little people....

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 20:07 | 1123458 Dental Floss Tycoon
Dental Floss Tycoon's picture

Martha Stewart got jail time for lying.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 20:43 | 1123569 PulauHantu29
PulauHantu29's picture

I'm sure the penalty will be quite severe: $50 fine and a stern talking to!

Now go on your way and never do it again.

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 23:02 | 1123917 indio007
indio007's picture

How can you find out what all these companies that mooched off the Fed posted as collateral? 

Thu, 03/31/2011 - 23:37 | 1123990 I Am The Unknow...
I Am The Unknown Comic's picture

"....that it can never be caught doing wrong. Well, it just was."

NO it wasn't!  No it wasn't!  No it wasn't! Blasphemy!  Police!  Police!  Police!  Somebody call the Dept of Homeland Security and shut this site down immediately!!!!  

They're rubber and you're glue!  What bounces off them sticks to you!  

How dare you question The Powers That Be!   How dare you Sir!  You are not worthy! 

Fri, 04/01/2011 - 03:59 | 1124319 Shylockracy
Shylockracy's picture

By now it should be clear even to the dimmest village idiot that the capture of the federal government by the likes of GS, JPM plus the FED has been total. They form a state within the state, capable of mobilizing illimited resources (FRNs, discount window) to fend off any challenges to their cryptocracy.

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!