Wonderbra Obamanomics: Keynesianism Explained Using Victoria's Secret Models

Tyler Durden's picture

With the topic of Keynesian stimulus now so prevalent, that for some reason everyone, even economic Ph.D.'s feel entitled to chime in with their useless opinions on whether or not it is appropriate for your overleveraged economy,  we would like to present this very educational anecdote about the Obamanomic version of Keynesianism as it pertains to jobs, explained by Daniel Mitchell of the Cato Institute. The kicker - Victoria's Secret models. If after this one still doesn't understand the wonderbra approach to pushing up our economy, one is hopeless.

From Cato@Liberty:

The White House is claiming that the so-called stimulus created between 2.5 million and 3.6 million jobs even though total employment has dropped by more than 2.3 million since Obama took office. The Administration justifies this legerdemain by asserting that the economy actually would have lost about 5 million jobs without the new government spending.
I’ve decided to adopt this clever strategy to spice up my social life. Next time I see my buddies, I’m going to claim that I enjoyed a week of debauchery with the Victoria’s Secret models. And if any of them are rude enough to point out that I’m lying, I’ll simply explain that I started with an assumption of spending -7 nights with the supermodels. And since I actually spent zero nights with them, that means a net of +7. Some of you may be wondering whether it makes sense to begin with an assumption of “-7 nights,” but I figure that’s okay since Keynesians begin with the assumption that you can increase your prosperity by transferring money from your left pocket to your right pocket.

And since any reference to Victoria's Secret would be a major tease without at least a clip from several recent Fashion Shows, here they are to prevent any confusion as to what this other Mark-To-Wonderbra concept is all about.


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Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

Gold down 1.5%

Platinum in an upward trend since the shakedown

Russ bent over at -4%

Giselle says, "Thank very much, Lennon ;)"

Strider52's picture

Two things that will get the comment-level up: Girls and Gold.

Tom Servo's picture

If you could work Israel and Iran in there, that's a grand slam...

Like, Israeli V.S. model caught smuggling gold into Iran.

ambrosiac's picture


How about Galbraith dissing Obama (and not only),




Nah.  I guess the girls have my full attention.


Nassim's picture

Lots of pretty girls in Iran. Don't know much about Israel. Can't say Jewish girls are pretty.

Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

"Mrs. Hendrix"

Or at least introduce me to one of her Aussie friends....

The accent kills me!

Mute the Usher, listen to this!


Gully Foyle's picture

Mr Lennon Hendrix

Dude the Kiwi accent may be more melodic.

Then again we have been burning through Outrageous Fortune by three or four episodes a night.


EscapeKey's picture

How many GS call options do I need to exercise to get one of those?

Eternal Student's picture

Q: What's the difference between Victoria Secret Models and the Economy?

A: We get screwed by the Economy.


SheepDog-One's picture

Keynesians, what a bunch of douchebags.

MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

I am glad I am Keynes and not Keynesian


(no not really.  Jung said something like that though)

homersimpson's picture

VS's new campaign - "Eat more meat"..

Quinvarius's picture

Lack of posts here indicates some heavy whacking going on.

BankaiNetworks's picture

...or the fact that its Friday and everyone is at the beach cause its too hot to sit at home and the market is inches from closing.

GIANTKILR's picture

Then everyone will be all sleepy, so this day is over. No wonder we haven't gotten the afternoon ramp up. Way to go Tyler!

WeeWilly's picture

THAT is stimulus I can...um...get behind!

the grateful unemployed's picture

all they need is the stock ticker running at the bottom and millions of investors will hit the buy button, booyah

FranSix's picture

It takes a lifetime of preparation for a momentary blow-off.

MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

Did you mean monetary blow-off?  ;)

FranSix's picture

As I was saying, the best position to have in the whole phantasm is probably providing the  brazillian wax jobs.  A mildly sado-masochistic occupation in which you can develop the most focussed zen and intimate encounters.

Alethiometer's picture

I'm sure Mr.(Ms.) Frank feels somewhat slighted by your metaphor.  Please use Calvin Klein men's underwear models next time to include legislatve tastes.  Thank you.

tj3's picture

I read, I raged, then I saw tits and GTFO...

firstdivision's picture

[ot]I see the PPT just got back from their afternoon dumb[/ot]

lizzy36's picture

So, tyler that stay at the monastery worker out well for you?

MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

Paper Street Ministry...Can I help you?

Tyler Durden's picture

Several punches in the ear were sufficient to recall Dick Bove's Buy rating of Lehman on September 9. All good now.

Freebird's picture

Exactly, the brainwashing & false sense of security oozing from the vested interests does result in a mix of lethargy & complacency. I could use a slap bitchez...after all it is Friday.

Ancona's picture

FIANLLY! Some chartology I can truly identify with!


Thank you Tyler!

brown_hornet's picture

Doesn't anyone think short hair (on women)is sexy anymore?

nmewn's picture

Only on Halle Barry ;-)

Dolar in a vortex's picture

You mean like a Brazilian, right?

Tarheel's picture

not a fan of heidi klum, too old now & has stretch marks...

carbonmutant's picture

Ok, OK, This I understand.

Yardfarmer's picture

man is the plaything of woman and woman is the plaything of the devil.

Reese Bobby's picture

It's o.k. to want to hump your mother dude...don't be so hard on yourself...

poopdeville's picture

Err, so jobs aren't created unless there's a net gain?  What manner of sophistry is that?

THE DORK OF CORK's picture

Ok keynesian stimulus spending .... check..... I think.

If somebody could give me a simple breakdown of how much money is still going into failed investments of the past vs new investments for the future it would be much appreciated.

I do not see it - the governments are only trying to keep the system ticking over while the vast bulk of the money is still feeding the bad bank investments.

My admittedly limited understanding of this strangely complex financial world is very jaundiced at this stage - but feel free to enlighten me if you wish.


traderjoe's picture

Well, that's pretty much it. Nothing's been done over the last 18 months to actually fix anything. It's just the politicians/banksters robbing the taxpayers to support their various positions/salaries/bonuses. And now the deflationary collapse comes where the banksters (newly propped up) repossess all the collateral. Then, hyper-inflation 'reflates' their value. 


ozziindaus's picture

I doubt the bond market will allow anymore money dumping into TBTF banks and by the looks of the UST's and USD, looks like the US leads the world again in global financial forecasting. There is simply no escape from this world wide deflationary black hole, and that includes emerging markets. 


RicktheDick's picture

Pretty much all the models are from Europe and South America. We even have to import hot ass now. Is there anything that America makes well anymore???

Yes We Can. But Lets Not.'s picture

Yeah.  Spoiled, brain-dead fat chicks whose match dot com dating profile headline reads "Make Me Laugh".