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Your Chance To Own A Little Piece Of Cramer

Tyler Durden's picture




 

It is no secret that Zero Hedge's favorite contemporary painter since what now seems time immemorial is none other than the unbeatably original Geoffrey Raymond. While his art has not made Sotheby's yet, it will eventually: after all who would not rather bet on the upside appreciation of an annotated painting of Dick Fuld, capturing the bipolar euphoria of a just insolvent Lehman Brothers for $30K than a diamond skull by Damien Hirst for a hundred million, with guaranteed downside?  That said, $30K may be a little steep for a population which still has to feel the impact of inflation on its paycheck. Which is why we are delighted to once again offer Zero Hedge readers the chance to get what Raymond calls The Perfect Gift for the Person who has (Almost) Everything... and at a discount. Geoffrey is offering signed and numbered prints of five of his favorite paintings with guaranteed delivery by the 24th.  They are "The Annotated Fuld", "The Annotated Fed", "The American Investor", "Big Lloyd 3 (The Root)" and one of my all-time favorites, "Cramer:  Naked Short".  Taken together, they are an amazing visual document of the American financial meltdown.  All these can be found at www.annotatedpaintings.blogspot.com. After all what better inflation hedge than acquiring a print of the unbridled genius presented below. Considering the subject's most recent Nielsen ratings, it may be archival very, very soon.

 

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Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:13 | 813900 Calvin Jones an...
Calvin Jones and the 13th Apostle's picture

Where would someone hang that thing?  I guess you could always hang it in the living room on Halloween.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:16 | 813916 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

You can hang it at the range, also.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:19 | 813921 Clapham Junction
Clapham Junction's picture

LOL.

 

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 18:10 | 814066 Kyron95131
Kyron95131's picture

+1

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 18:17 | 814082 rosiescenario
rosiescenario's picture

..read my mind...better than shooting at the Zombie targets....

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 18:36 | 814116 High Plains Drifter
High Plains Drifter's picture

Maybe he can turn out some el cheapo prints for the gun range?  Head shots, not problem at 100 yards , all day long. Get ready for the day.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 18:04 | 814052 DocLogo
DocLogo's picture

bathroom

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 18:08 | 814061 Oppressed In Ca...
Oppressed In California's picture

One of those rooms with the padded walls.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 20:24 | 814376 TwitFilter
TwitFilter's picture

Didn't know Cramer had three tits...

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:15 | 813907 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

One of them is the product of a disturbed mind.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 18:03 | 814051 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

I'm sure his mom and dad meant well.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 18:45 | 814139 cosmictrainwreck
cosmictrainwreck's picture

no excuse

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:17 | 813917 Clapham Junction
Clapham Junction's picture

The work is excellent, and if it weren't for the deflationary crash coming, rendering works of art worthless, I still wouldn't buy one.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 22:38 | 814719 FEDbuster
FEDbuster's picture

You can't eat (most) art.

To those interested in taking Cramer to the range with you, may I suggest downloading and printing the following image:

"Cramer shows you where to place your shots."

http://images.huffingtonpost.com/gen/32451/thumbs/s-JIM-CRAMER-large.jpg

 

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:17 | 813918 Gene Parmesan
Gene Parmesan's picture

Pretty cool, but how many prints is he making and selling in these runs? Or is it sort of a fiat thing where he just prints more as needed? I'd also be interested in seeing how well they spread out when dropped in bulk from, say, a helicopter.

Sat, 12/18/2010 - 23:20 | 816398 hugomarch
hugomarch's picture

That's pretty funny.  Your post is best in class.  You are right though - Making art is like creating your own currency.  Prints are the art equivalent of fiat currency.  Upon further thought, I would avoid both this guy's art and the Damian Hurst Diamond Skull.  My recommend goes with this FREE performance art, satirical masterwork.  This vid is a tide turner, a game changer, a seminal occurrence, a secular event.  The feds should just throw in the towel NOW before they embarrass themselves even more... 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hl4NlA97GeQ&feature=sub

 

 

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:20 | 813925 Chartist
Chartist's picture

When I was a kid, Rod Serling had a show called "Night Gallery".  It featured macabre paintings with a scary story built around them.  Rod Serling, if he were still alive, would have a field day with the Cramer painting.

Fri, 01/21/2011 - 09:48 | 813947 Clapham Junction
Clapham Junction's picture

(d)

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 18:24 | 814093 rosiescenario
rosiescenario's picture

...being of your vintage, I recall Serling's show...what a genius...no one like him today....you see what absolutely idiotic crap is put on TV today and you do not need to wonder why our nation believes in things such as 'green shoots' and unemployed recoveries, etc.

 

Maybe the chemtrail theorists have it right...the government has been crop dusting us with moron juice this last decade?

Sat, 12/18/2010 - 05:49 | 815245 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture

now, now.  have you watched "breaking bad"?  that's as good as anything on the old t.v.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:23 | 813931 MarketTruth
MarketTruth's picture

Prints are a waste of money, yet ~$50k for each of the originals may be a good deal. Buy ALL of the originals you can, loan them to various museums for a fee and over the years they easily pay for themselves. Mate it with various news clips from CNBC, etc on video screen about the originals and you have a small collection exhibit.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:21 | 813934 velobabe
velobabe's picture

I am an assparagus

Sat, 12/18/2010 - 12:33 | 815421 doolittlegeorge
doolittlegeorge's picture

better than a appster-gas i guess

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:22 | 813937 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

SLW selloff anybody?  What casued that, precious metals were strong today.  News?

Sat, 12/18/2010 - 05:50 | 815246 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture

up some after hours.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:23 | 813938 Stubert
Stubert's picture

Cramer now telling all to buy any dips in Gold prices.

http://www.cnbc.com/id/40718431?__source=yahoo%7Cheadline%7Cquote%7Ctext%7C&par=yahoo

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:27 | 813951 Gene Parmesan
Gene Parmesan's picture

Per the title, these might sell better if each actually had a little piece of Cramer glued on in one of the corners, sort of like those baseball cards where they cut a jersey into a thousand pieces and stick them in the card. I'm not sure how many people would want an actual chunk of asshole hanging on their wall at home, but it would make for good conversation if nothing else.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:29 | 813960 Unlawful Justice
Unlawful Justice's picture

Reminds me of the picture of Dorian Gray

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9h9a3Sx6220

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 18:34 | 814111 rosiescenario
rosiescenario's picture

....and then there's the irony to your comparison:

 

"Influence is a recurring theme throughout the book. Influence is largely depicted by the author as immoral, as it eventually may turn people toward decisions that are not true to themselves, as best exemplified by Dorian Gray. However, all people are influenced and act as influences, and ironically, the book itself may influence its reader, though the preface paradoxically states that no artist, in their work, "desires to prove anything" or has "ethical sympathies." Dorian Gray is influenced toward his life of decadence by the hedonist philosophy of Lord Henry; prior to this, Dorian was perceived as innocent and inexperienced. Dorian's painting also influenced him, though it was merely a work of art. Basil, too, was influenced by his own painting of Dorian.

In addition to influence is the problem of who is to be held responsible for certain actions. Dorian's major flaw is that he is never able to hold himself accountable, instead, avoiding admission of responsibility by justifying his actions according to the philosophy of the new hedonism. When Sibyl commits suicide, Dorian distances himself from the blame by viewing her death as a work of art—a sort of tragic drama. In his frenzy to assign the responsibility to anyone but himself, Dorian blames Basil for the path his life has taken. In killing Basil, the narrator even writes the scene to demonstrate Dorian's perception that it is the knife that commits the murder, leaving Dorian himself, again, blameless. At the end of the novel, when it occurs to Dorian that he might confess, he instead chooses to destroy the painting, which he sees as the only piece of evidence that remains of his ethical crimes."

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:40 | 813990 silver surfer
silver surfer's picture

This reminds me to link you all to Pushwanger http://www.pushwagner.no/?id=2 he is a brilliant Norwegian artist commenting our sick society and the paper people...

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:40 | 813991 gwar5
gwar5's picture

Leonard the monkey is laughing

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:40 | 813993 Spaceman Spiff
Spaceman Spiff's picture

Caught him on tv briefly today saying that dips are a gift and we should buy them.   I thought of ZH instantly.   

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:42 | 814001 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

Did he say "buy the fucking dip you idiot" because if he didn't then he's doing it wrong.

Sat, 12/18/2010 - 12:35 | 815424 doolittlegeorge
doolittlegeorge's picture

i think it was "farging ice-holes!  cork-suckers!"  who remembers movies like that anymore!

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:53 | 814026 Miss Expectations
Miss Expectations's picture

I find all these painting disturbing.  The subjects may buy them up just so they can be destroyed.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 17:55 | 814032 ZackAttack
ZackAttack's picture

Grotesque, yet I cannot look away.  

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 18:14 | 814077 Rover
Rover's picture

"I sense great vulnerability. A man-child crying out for love. An innocent orphan in the post-modern world."
"I see a parasite. A sexually depraved miscreant who is seeking only to gratify his basest and most immediate urges."
"His struggle is man's struggle. He lifts my spirit."
"He is a loathesome, offensive brute. Yet I can't look away."
"He transcends time and space."
"He sickens me."
"I love it."
"Me too."

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 18:24 | 814095 WTF2
WTF2's picture

A conversation piece, that's about it.

Sat, 12/18/2010 - 12:39 | 815429 doolittlegeorge
doolittlegeorge's picture

tis a "long on the verbage" piece.  i agree.  perhaps a "move-a-long now, nothing going on here" sequel is in order?  something...."Rothko-esque."  a "square" or a "block"--all in "shades of white"--kind of sums of The Street to me....

Sat, 12/18/2010 - 23:09 | 816378 hugomarch
hugomarch's picture

Rothko was very particular about where - and with what other artists' works - his pieces were hung at shows. 

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 18:29 | 814098 grunk
grunk's picture

It's only going to go down in value.

 

It's a Cramer!

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 18:34 | 814114 Cdad
Cdad's picture

I'm only going to say one thing here.  I don't want a little piece of Cramer any more than I want a big piece of Cramer...but then I don't have any idea about high art or such things.

Just sayin'....

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 18:44 | 814133 bob_dabolina
bob_dabolina's picture

Kramer has three nipples?

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 18:45 | 814136 Cheesy Bastard
Cheesy Bastard's picture

Or no nipples and three ringworm trails.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 20:41 | 814427 ToNYC
ToNYC's picture

 

The forked tongue and arrow-tipped tail was quite enough for me to get his drift. I've heard that he blows goats; he lies and his feet stink. If that don't beat all, he has a face for radio. I shudder when I go to Ocean Grove or San Miguel de Allende imagining that I might bump into him. Otherwise, he's a nice guy according to his embracing the FAIL mother.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 19:04 | 814174 greenewave
greenewave's picture

The horror of war and MASSIVE political and civil unrest is COMING TO THE UNITED STATES.

Please watch the video “Hero of War” at (http://youtu.be/z0XPqiQM92Q) and see what the MAINSTREAM MEDIA doesn’t want you to see.

-Anonymous

Wow this look like a movie but the truth is that it’s not.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 19:13 | 814204 Dr. Sandi
Dr. Sandi's picture

Deja vu. Seems like I've seen this before somewhere!

You make the erroneous assumption that the MSM gives a rat's ass about what I see.

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 21:07 | 814520 Just_Another_User
Just_Another_User's picture

This is a great piece... wish I had the extra $ around to buy it... Id hang it in my office & die of laughter at all the great digs... Its not intended to pay homage to the man!

"Ive got Lenny Dykstra so far up my ass, all I can taste is spittin' tobacco" -- CLASSIC!

"SHAMEFUL LIAR" -- Love that one!

"You sir are a charlatan, a perfect example of whats wrong w/ CNBC" -- So, true!

& my personal fav... "YOU SUCK!"

Fri, 12/17/2010 - 23:43 | 814857 Mont Bleu
Mont Bleu's picture

The guy is a failed artist, I don't get who would be dumb enough to throw money at this "art"

Sat, 12/18/2010 - 06:02 | 815248 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture

why misspell damien hirst's name with an actual link to his wikipedia entry?  hurst is the famous shifter for high performance racing cars (hot rod magazine, early 60's), hearst is the yellow journalist/proto citizen kane and grandfather of celebrity domestic terrorist/stockholm syndromist, patty.  

Sat, 12/18/2010 - 10:01 | 815308 tamboo
tamboo's picture

like we dont see enough of these hideous thieving jew murderers as it is.
http://www.nogw.com/download2/%5E8_jewish_human_sacrifice.pdf

Sat, 12/18/2010 - 17:17 | 815852 gwar5
gwar5's picture

I just noticed -- Cramer had a boob job.

Don't tell Leonard the monkey.

Sat, 12/18/2010 - 23:00 | 816370 hugomarch
hugomarch's picture

I couldn't tell you what is a POMO or a SOMA but, I do know something about art.  This stuff is sheit.  My recommend goes with Damian Hurst's Diamond Skull. 

Sun, 12/19/2010 - 06:53 | 816730 No More Bubbles
No More Bubbles's picture

Cool, but I'd much rather see a painting of a decapitated Cramer next to a Guillotine.  Actually, forget the painting, I want to see the real thing.....

Sun, 12/19/2010 - 12:41 | 816916 Shylockracy
Shylockracy's picture

The style is reministent of Pollock; but this being Cramer, Bollock captures better the spirit.

Sun, 12/19/2010 - 12:43 | 816921 hugomarch
hugomarch's picture

G.R. - Don't lose your day job. 

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!