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You Know You Are A Conspiracy Theorist If...
Submitted by Mike Krieger of Liberty Blitzkrieg blog,
- You are capable of critical thinking.
- You distrust mainstream media.
- You like nature.
- You think it’s a good idea to spend the Friday after Thanksgiving with your family rather than camping outside Best Buy to get a cheap plasma television made in China.
- You think it’s a little strange that WTC building 7 came down at free fall speed on 9/11 yet it was never hit by a plane.
- You think that drones in America might not be for Al Qaeda.
- You would like to be able to get on a plane without having to engage in a mandatory radiation bath and digital strip search.
- You have read a book in the past year.
- You think you have the right to protest.
- You think the War on Terror is a scam.
- You think the War on Drugs is a scam.
- You think the anger directed at America from the Middle East could possibly be related to our foreign policy rather than hating how amazingly free we are.
- You think the Republicans and Democrats are exactly the same on the important issues affecting our country.
- You think believing in The Constitution does not constitute a terrorist act.
- You have heard of the Bill of Rights and can even name what some of them are.
- You question whether the government loves you.
- You think the right to bear arms is not for hunting, rather so citizens can fight back should the government become a bunch of tyrannical thugs.
- You don’t own a television, and if you do, all you watch is RT, especially the Keiser Report and Capital Account.
- You don’t think the NDAA is the name of Kesha’s latest single.
- You think rich, powerful and connected people should be subject to the rule of law and go to jail if they commit crimes. Even if they are bankers and work at JP Morgan or Goldman Sachs.
- You think corporations aren’t people.
- You think Warren Buffet is a phony and a crony capitalist.
- You don’t care that Warren Buffet likes cherry coke, hamburgers and ice cream. He’s still a bad guy.
- You know that gold was made illegal by FDR in 1933 and confiscated from the American people. You know that gold bullion remained illegal for Americans to own until 1975.
- You think politicians that push for war should be sent to fight on the front lines. If they are unable, their children should go.
- You want your food to be labeled GMO so that you can make your own decisions on what you are consuming.
- You grow your own food.
- You buy raw milk.
- You think food and energy should be included in inflation calculations.
- You are aware that the Department of Homeland Security has purchased 1.2 billion rounds of ammo in the past year.
- You question whether said ammo purchases are in anticipation of a Normandy beach style landing by Al Qaeda.
- You think allowing a small group of unelected people (The Federal Reserve) to print unlimited amounts of money and distribute it as they please might not be a good idea.
If you answered yes to more than five of the 32 questions above, you might be a conspiracy theorist.
You also may be on the government’s terror watch list.
Be very alarmed and report it to the authorities immediately should you discover your neighbors engaged in such uncivilized thought.
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"How was I to know- she was with the Russians too?"(see red pill above)
Did you go home with a waitress again?
i dont wanna talk about it
Abby Martin and her show on RT are a must watch.... where the hell does RT find these amazing women.
Agreed.
Brains and Beauty. Basically the polar opposite of Michelle Malkin.
where the hell does RT find these amazing women?
The Eastern European standards are in an altogether different league than ours.
and please don't forget that RT is GASP owned by Russian Jews....I guess some in here would call that jewmedia and not tune in....did you know that the author of Fight Club is......gasp.....a Russian Jew???????? And Max Keiser....gasp....
And Lauren is......one of my girlfriends....
that would explain all the stories on RT about the fake "band"/psy-op pussy riot....
Lauren is not available? I should have guessed.
*snickers*
they don't call it the boob tube fer nuthin' lads. . .
bait.
Nice!
isn't it just crazy that a icon of capitalist economic news comes from russia and not from america?!
And no one wonders why he permits it...I mean whats next, the Chi-Coms having a lower corporate tax rate than the US?
Oh, wait...
Waaaaaaaaaait...
The chi-coms have corporations?
That means they have stock markets, too?
Yes!
Its like some giant governmental company thingy!...they got papers of incorporation too, sworn in directors & board officers and everything...its like nothing ever changes just the stripes along with the control and direction of the herd...its really wild!!! ;-)
"Lauren Lyster's legs" pulls up automatically on Google. Wonder how I found that out.
Thought Crime for the Day:
Stop Paying Your Taxes
...don't feed the suckers/fuckers
The IRS will be kicking your door in in 3..... 2...... 1......
Not if you can get elected.
just bundle.......
They don't need your money, in case you haven't noticed they can print all they need. Tax is about snooping in your private life and coming up with more excuses to invade your privacy.
Tax is a tool against inflation!
They print all they want for themselves and then take it from you - inflation management.
What would the value of the dollar be if all those extra ones taken by taxation were allowed to circulate?
Nope. Tax is progressively levied based on income. It prevents/hinders capital formation, not consumer expenditure. Low income earners who consume all their income are virtually tax free, while high earners are hindered from forming a capital accumulation that can result in productive investment. It is consumption demand that mainly drives inflation.
Income tax is the tool of choice to turn citizens into subjects.
Even Saudi Arabia, which used to be income tax free until the eighties, has fallen for its attraction.
I'm more of the view that taxes are a form of part-time enslavement. The day I can legally stop paying taxes is gonna be a day I celebrate my freedom. Oh, and when I want need any ID, or buiding permits or a driving licence and... Oh, nevemind.
what percentage of the population must refuse to pay federal income taxes before the system breaks down.... the first group will go to jail... but there is a breaking point.
Ask a Greek!
Greece demonstrates the point made by 'agent default' ... that they don't actually need the money, just the control.
Not only are Greek taxpayers on strike, but also Greek tax collectors! ... yet the EU still keeps sending the Greek government freshly-printed Draghi-Dollares in order to retain Greece in the control grid.
However, witholding taxes is a good start. Secession would be far more productive in neutering the power of the central planners.
Go Catalans!!!
Newsflash skippy ... the system is breaking down now.
yeah, but the timing is critical for the individual. if you're too soon, you get legal troubles.
" the first group will go to jail" only if you let them , there are no laws for them so there are none for us.
Obama is a liar , Romney is an idiot, but most of America will vote for them ?
Brilliant,your doomed Sir!!!
Uh oh...
30/32... I will start to look in the sky more often... You never know...
What happens if I agreed with 39 of the 32?
ai...xel...syd
always move in a zig-zag pattern.
My pockets are full of chaff, and I can shoot flares out my rectum. I'm a bit of a Maverick that way.
Same here . . . .
Well, it's been an interesting life . . . . .
On the subject of books - notice how VERY FEW bookshelves seem to be visible in the glossy magazine images of "Modern Homes", in stark contrast to the now mandatory large-area flat screen tv and "high-end" Home Entertainment Systems
Maybe they've all "migrated" their book collections onto portable devices (e.g. Amazon Kindle)? Maybe not . . . . .
Scheiße
I'm in deep....
•You've read alternative media
Can you say, RON PAUL
You just say "Ron Paul" on ZH and you will get approximately 62 up votes and 3 down votes.
Rightfully so.
What happens when you say Les Paul?
W Banzai7 comes with the Toppings!!
you'll get an upvote from this poster, instead of an *eye roll*
I chime in with +100.
Les was the man.
Wrong Paul
Ron Paul
RuPaul
I can say he has been in office long enough to be bought and paid for, in reality. What a way to split the conservative ticket and give the libs another 4 years. Remember 92 and Ross? WTF are you all thinking. Promises, promises, promises. I don't trust ANY politician! Words are cheap. Does anyone actually think the PTB would let him implement his platform. In the words of Aerosmith... "Dream on"
Your theory would make sense if there was any fundamental difference between "conservatives" and "libs"
Pepsi vs. Coke - Different cans, same SHIT inside!
My theory, as you call it, which is reality does make sense. JFK issued U.S. Treasury notes in 2 and 5 Dollar denominations in an effort to reclaim the CONSTITUTIONAL authority of coining money and regulating the value thereof by congress and was assassinated for his boldness. You really think RP stands a better chance?
P.S. And i do know the difference between lib and con. Socialism vs. Fascism. They both lead to communism!
What exactly do you think Ro-money is gonna do for us? Audit the Fed? Nawp. End the Fed? Nawp. Get rid of O'bomb-a-care? Nawp. End the drone strikes? Nawp. End Indefinite Detention? Nawp. Veto the next renewal of the "Patriot Act"? Nawp. Strike down Trapwire? Nawp. Eliminate the Orwellian DHS? Nawp. Shitcan TSA? Nawp. End the 'war on drugs'? Nawp. End the fucking bullshit, liberty-stripping 'war on terror'? Not a fuckin' chance, Charlie.
What exactly is it that "conservative" Ro-money in his magic underwear is gonna do any different than O'bomb-a?
addendum to my list above:
~~ you understand that NO figurehead elected prezzydent has any voice in the way the system presents itself
~~ you act accordingly, freeing up valuable mind-space to pay attention to more important issues
A reading comprehension impediment? Where in my comment did i endorse Romney? I don't vote, have never voted and don't intend to vote in the future. I learned that voting is a futile exercise and a waste of a beautiful day when i was in Nam. But, to each his own.
Can you say "Ron Paul Punk Rock Anthem"? The guy that wrote and recorded this on a Tuesday night last August with a six-pack of PBR tall boys :) ] must be a threat...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eWC_0jPFQ_Q
how 'bout- Israel sets/controls US Mid-East policy?
not sure but the house of saud and XOM might have some say as well
Pls explain the difference between a Saud and a jew. ;)
https://www.google.com/search?q=The+Emergence+of+Wahhabism+and+its+Histo...
798.85 miles
I have even included a link to my research. Enjoy!!!
http://www.distancefromto.net/distance-from/Israel/to/Saudi+Arabia
If they raised the speed limit to 80, that's only a 10 hour drive.
Sorta like going to mother-in-law's
agreed .... we even have a few minutes to stop along side the road and say a prayer.
I just snorted Vernor's ginger ale....
haha sorry about that.
No differene between a Saud and a Jew cause they are both from the same "rotten seed" of Abraham!!! And they both don't eat pork meat!
house of saud is firmly under zionist control... so really talking about the same people.
+1
It never ceases to amaze me how many long-time 'Hedgers still have no clue of the difference between Zionists and Jews, between Ashkenazi and Sephardi, between Khazarians and Semites, between planners and scapegoats.
Dumb fucking sheep!!!!!!!!!!
No way man. That's just arab propaganda and Israel totally deny this........
http://news.yahoo.com/israelis-fear-pm-meddling-us-politics-161611300.ht...
I answered yes to all points but i am not a conspiracy theorist, i am a truth seeker.
STOP, this was put out by the CIA. They are just taking names and seeing how far gone you...
Drone strikes in 3 2 1
That, or the flouride truck comes around to take another 15 IQ points away.
Oh, the one with the little bells and the funny tasting bluish Popsicles?
33 if you believe the Good Humor man is selling anything but ice cream.
Bring 'em on! Bill Cooper said that a man without principles that he is ready and willing to die for at any given moment is already dead and is of no use or consequence whatsoever.
I second that emotion.
That list pretty much includes everyone unless you have to believe in all of them if that's the case I think they will be coming for a lot of you before me first. Although this ought to get me labeled as a #1 Terrorist
The CIA-Soros Partnership
well that and admittingly a few other things on the list :)
If you say "Fuck Bernanke"..
"If you answered yes to more than five of the 32 questions above..."
Shit! I couldn't even answer "No" to five of the 32.
Im totally going as a tin foil hat wearer for Halloween.
My only "no" came from the fact that I don't watch television. I sorta knew I was fucked already, though.
This alone makes you a conspiracy theorist in the eyes of most people.
"....what do you mean the government doesn't have my best interests at heart?!"
: /
The Cake is a Lie
mmmmm. . . pie.
Whew...I'm safe....
Me too... Never answer 'yes.'
...if you ask why there is no two ounce, 100 $ denominated quadruple Eagle gold coin ?
*conspiracy factseeker
If you believe that 9/11 was an inside job then you are a conspiracy theorist.
If you believe that free-fall collapses of 3 steel-framed buildings by 2 planes on 9/11 was accomplished by a bearded man with failing kidneys who survived till May 1, 2011, then you may need to be tested for Alzheimers or Parkinsons.
Either way, you come to know a lot about yourself.
It's hip to be a conspiracy theorist. I friggin describe myself as one openly in mixed or new company freely. Anyone who is not a conspiracy theorist is a boring friggin square that I want to have nothing to do with.
You believe MASS ARRESTS of criminal politicians and banksters is about to take place... http://tinyurl.com/cd5cyjo/
Watch the ending scene of Boiler Room and listen to the Wilcox-Drake interview (linked above) and you might just be a believer too! http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0181984/
I originally said yes to 30 but then I switched 27 to no......so now I am ok
I answered 'yes' to 31 of those questions, and lied on one of 'em.
I always knew you were a liar.
I'm in for all but two 1) I do own a TV and I like to watch baseball on it and 2) Years ago I stood in a Best Buy line and got two very good speakers at 1/2 price. I guess I'm a sell out?
Don't let any of the tinfoiler elitism make you question your integrity.
On 9/11, with Multiple TVs going, I caught the first reporting of building 7's pending demise. Not the famous BBC report, btw. This was American media telling us the building was going to fall, 30 some odd minutes in advance. They gave the timing and had the cameras set on 7 for the show. I took that as a message and still do to this day.
So, the TV is a great REMINDER, if anything, that the official story is a total crock of shit, and now with HD and good speakers, whatever part of the revolution gets televised will be that much better.
I have a TV on 24/7, Full tinfoil-throttle since 9/11. Its where the matrix shows its cracks, afterall.
Oh, and family time round thanksgiving is not all Norman Rockwell all the time.
+discount speakers
I just reported myself to the Camden Police Department.
Try the fire department before they're extinguished too (pun intended)!
Should be if you DIDN'T say yes to at leasst 5 of the 32 you're a delusional sheep.
Should be if you said NO to at least 5 of the 32 you need to report to ZH for a re-education tuneup.
30/32 here. Just like Bartanist? I don't buy raw milk. May have something to do with not liking milk. And my TV is for tenants.
The list is too weak. Let's kick it up a notch.
--------------------------------------------
You might be a conspiracy theorist if:
You think the Virginia earthquake was due to the military nuking an Illuminati bug-out base.
You think the Batman shooting and the Sikh Temple shooting were false flags run by the same people.
You think Obama is a CIA mind control puppet.
You think the real reason psychedelics are illegal is because they show you the truth.
You think the two main reasons the puppetmasters killed JFK were because acid dissolved his chains and because he wanted to remonetize silver (Executive Order 11110)
You think the Universe is a giant organism in the process of waking up.
You think humans are livestock for invisible soul-sucking entities from another plane of existence, and the Illuminati are the farmers. They are also the eaten. Hollowed out by spiritual worms until there is no real "I" left.
You think America is a puppet state of Israel.
You think America's leaders are purposefully clusterfucking it in all holes in a giant and highly profitable controlled demolition, WTC style. They hate us for our freedoms.
You think the Illuminati intend to slaughter most of us.
You think 800 gulags have already been built in America for this purpose.
You think most incidents of mass slaughter are actually carefully staged human sacrifices intended to give the Illuminati greater power.
You think the Rothschilds helped set up the Holocaust.
You think you can use their obsession with numerology to predict the next major false flag (Dec 21, 11:11am, London financial district?)
You think Satan is real.
You think the Illuminati are working towards a world central bank that will issue an implantable credit chip that will be the mark of the Beast.
You think aliens are real and they will reveal themselves shortly.
You think that after the puppetmasters are defeated, there will be a glorious new renaissance of suppressed technologies.
You think Alex Jones is trying to prematurely ejaculate the 2nd American Revolution.
Ok, even kicking it up to a higher level of conspiracy, I'm still in trouble. There's at least five on that list...
Kicking it up again. I believe time travel is possible. Satanists are running the Vatican. Consensus reality is a giant collective hallucination. Jonestown was a CIA experiment. Still not crazy enough? Here are a few ideas that even I consider to be nuts:
The Earth is a giant bonbon full of light, sweet crude.
The Moon is a giant alien mind-control Death Star.
The Queen is a shapeshifting space reptile. She keeps that huge pack of corgies so nobody notices when she swallows one. Check out her latest "Baby Bump": http://www.thesun.co.uk/queens_baby_bump.html. Quick, before they flush the link down the memory hole!
HAARP causes earthquakes. (Sorry, the energy scales are vastly different and there is no way to know enough about the distribution of cracks and strains to set one off by remote control tickling).
You can have total freedom from cops, courts, and the IRS if you write your name in lowercase and spend years studying the right incantations to use on a judge. They have to eventually bring you before a judge because that's THE LAW... isn't it? And everyone knows that all the bastard cronies in the world can't stop judges from obeying THE LAW... Bwahahahah! The truth is that no serf will be allowed to magically hack a judge by denying a UCC contract. Even if the law itself could hold a judge accountable, it is still so complex it can effectively become anything they want it to be. Most of it is kept secret from you. Therefore the "rule of law" is fiction. The entire legal apparatus is a giant psyops against the serfs to keep them from realizing that the only law they have left is the law of the jungle. When everyone figures this out the hard way, the worm will turn. All paper laws will evaporate like chaff in a firestorm. The elites will clutch their papers saying that you are legally a subject of the Queen, the Vatican legally owns (and rehypothecates) your soul and your birth certificate is a certificate of chattel slavery to the Rothschilds. Quite plausible. So what. Their laws won't save them from the guillotine any more than common law will save you from prison. For now, keep a low profile and stall for time.
Loch Ness monster, faeries, merfolk, homeopathy, WTC hologram planes, Apollo hoax, Planet Nibiru, astrology, pole shift, hollow Earth, young Earth, water-powered car, crystals, pyramid power, orgone energy, Vril energy, free energy. All bullshit.
Jesus never existed. Or, if He did, He commands you to smite gays, feminists, Iraqis, etc. If you don't, He will smite America.
Cops protect and serve you.
You will get the full value of your Social Security.
Your opinions are born of your own free will.
You have a voice within the system.
In today's America that doesn't make me a conspiracy theorist , it makes me a terrorist.
Even Isaac Newton knows 9/11 official conspiracy is a bunch of BS.
Gosh, I own a TV and don't drink raw milk (or milk of any kind for that matter).
Are my eyes really blue?
Please report to the principals office.
http://www.noagendashow.com/
food and energy in inflation numbers? that's crazy talk...
You clean your weapons while listening to "Coast To Coast".
+radio for crazy people.
Nothing better than CTC while driving through the night, in the middle of nowhere..
What if I believe that Obummer's birth certificate is fake? Does that make me a conspiracy theorist?
Nope, that's not a theory.
if you believe aapl is getting a check cut by the cia ........oh forget it. my bad
Note from CIA/FBI: We have decided to take ZH account holder "slaughterer" into custody. You will not be hearing from him anymore.
Someone mentions Hayek and you envision Friedrich before Salma...
Methinks that a rubric for a test of a different sort.
You are a prepper who stores food, water, guns, ammo, and fuel, just in case.
They will forward your mail etc to your newly erected "Green" FEMA Camp.
At first blush reading the article, I thought I wouldn't answer yes to one question ha! I answered yes to all. I had to re-read just to make sure I answered yes to all the questions ha!
...i am waiting to be told what i am by my elected officials.
You believe most government reports are manipulated or simply outright lies.
Waaaaaaait.....
or even,
You believe most governments are manipulated or simply outright lies.
After reading the fifth one...I heard the black helos and there was a nock at the door.
I am currently in a bunker with a guy that looks remarkably like Dick Cheney.
DON'T GO HUNTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You DON'T believe the unemployment rate is 8.1%.
+1 for the spiffy Warren Zevon reference. Send Laywers, Guns and Money...........cause the $hit has hit the fan!. You got that right Warren, sure has.
If you believe the Zionists are setting up a Bolshevik style revolution in the US.
I wish them a whole heaping helping with THAT one. When Americans "finally" realize what is going on... our second amendment rights are coming out in a blazing thunder.
NNNNNNNNNNO. It will be staged and served as a liberating, righteous plight of the people and end with a usurped population under a quasi Zionist regime ala USSR. The Bolshevik revolution was orchestrated by Zionist jews, not Russian nationalists.
By the time it's over, you're going to reminisce the "good old" days of the corrupt, scandalous, greedy, unscrupulous rat otherwise know as the politician.
Americans ain't gonna realize shit. Ever. All they (we) give fuck about is college and pro sports, reality TV, keeping up with the Joneses and making the payments on the debt that lets them live beyond their means. For the vast majority of people, freedom, liberty, and responsibility are at the bottom of the list of what they want in life. Those of us who really do want liberty are fucked, cause our Constitutional Republic has been replaced with a socialist (fascist, really) oligarchical quasi-democracy.
Do you find it physically impossible that oxygen starved aviation fuel can melt steel columns?
Well, I used to, then I read this.
http://www.nme.com/news/muse/66278
"My political views are a bit more nuanced now."
:) Good one. Now I feel safe.
nuanced: defined as,
I gots a major label recording contract & a manager & an upcoming amrrrkan tour.
is all bizness when you sign the contracts. . .
Just watch any documentary about demolition work... if explosives aren't precisely placed and timed to explode, the structure won't fall down. You can choose to believe the Popular Mechanics snow-job version or you can choose to believe Architects for 9/11 Truth. http://www.ae911truth.org/
No differene between a Saud and a Jew cause they are both from the same "rotten seed" of Abraham!!! And they both don't eat pork meat!
Another 4 years of Obama ... Smith and Wesson (SWHC) will double again
I'm in good company.
I'm going straight to what is important to all Americans. The replacement football refs in the NFL have been placed there by the mob in order to loot everyday Americans of there hard earned fantasy football money. /sarc
there b the money, go git it now! Might be fantasy gold! ;-)
- Ned
only five? kinda low bar, don't you think? - Ned
let's knock off the horse shit and get straight to the point.....i believe that
1. the rockefeller brothers ordered the murder of john f kennedy
2. the bush crime syndicate led by prescott bush executed the murder of jfk with poppy bush leading the exiled cubans among other things
3. the fbi under hoover's orders with assistance from the army delta force assassins, memphis police dept, and crime elements murdered martin luther king, jr in cold blood
4. the bush crime syndicate murdered robert kennedy in cold blood
5. the bush crime syndicate attempted to murder ronald reagan
6. the bush crime syndicate murdered john lennon in cold blood
7. the bush crime syndicate destroyed the wtc complex and pentagon. they did it without the use of planes!!!!
i could go on, but i hope that you get the point.
pretty good, 'cept for the delta bit.
- Ned
{don't get me started ;-)}
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cev4q2bpVTw
Yes, we get the point. Tricyclic antidepressants do not work on everybody.
That was the point, right?
None of you have actually have to deal with the IRS. Welcome to 360° psychophanty.
Timmay and the lords of the underworld
Mr. Krieger, I regret that I only have one upvote to give ...
All of the above you MFr's!