Presenting Warren Buffett's "Gold Cube"

Tyler Durden's picture

Recall from Warren Buffett's 2011 letter to investors:

Today the world’s gold stock is about 170,000 metric tons. If all of this gold were melded together, it would form a cube of about 68 feet per side. (Picture it fitting comfortably within a baseball infield.) At $1,750 per ounce – gold’s price as I write this – its value would be $9.6 trillion....You can fondle the cube, but it will not respond.

Below is what said gold cube containing all the world's gold would look like, with distinctions for the various types of gold currently in existence:

source: Deutsche

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akak's picture


I'd appreciate it if he would bring me back my hubcaps...

Since they were engraved with the name "Cesar", Jesus rendered unto Cesar accordingly.

buckethead's picture

Is there still a market for hub caps? Well, I suppose spinning hubcaps...

mick_richfield's picture

If I recall correctly, Jesus said:

Render unto Caesar what is Caesar's.  But it looks like this American Gold Eagle says 'Liberty' on the front.  So there you go.

RichardP's picture


And this also:

And Jesus said unto them, "And whom do you say that I am?"

They replied, "You are the eschatological manifestation of the ground of our being, the ontological foundation of the context of our very selfhood revealed."

And Jesus replied, "Wha ... ?"


Grinder74's picture

Jesus didn't say that.  But Mohammed did say, "An ounce of gold is worth a dozen 9-year old brides."

are we there yet's picture

He Also married one of his own biological daughters as part of his harem.  Not a secret. So many creepy things from that guy.'s picture

Abraham married his sister. Mary was likely about twelve years old when she became pregnant and married Joseph.

RichardP's picture

Sarah was Abraham's half-sister.  Same father; different mothers.  Around that time it was acceptable to take half-sister as first wife and cousin as later, second wife.'s picture

If the "it was acceptable at that time" excuse works for Abraham then it ought to work for Mohammed as well.

RichardP's picture

Whatever you are refering to, was it acceptable at the time of Mohammed?

My point of acceptability includes the fact that there were other kings/leaders of people at the time of Abraham who had a half-sister as first wife and in later years a cousin as other wife.  Whatever you are refering to with Mohammed, can you point to other notables at his level doing the same thing at that time?'s picture

The betrothal of girls to adult males has been common in many times and places including the Middle East in the 7th century.

CPL's picture

It started strong but lost the usual twist in the end.


Maybe something like.


Sock “investors” do absolutely nothing for this country whatsoever.  Hoarding socks instead of investing in hoserie and stockings demonstrates a sick narcissism and complete disregard for building the economy. Real investors actually help people by investing in blue sock companies employing thousands of Americans, or buying US Socks and enabling the government to do its job. What do sock investors do to help the economy? Absolutely nothing. Unlike real investors sock hoarders are purely in it for themselves, and serve no purpose to society whatsoever.

I think it needs a rewrite though.. 

zendome's picture

How about:


Lemon wedge “investors” do absolutely nothing for this country whatsoever.  Hoarding lemon wedges instead of investing in highballs and sparkling water demonstrates a sick narcissism and complete disregard for building the economy. Real investors actually help people by investing in yellow lemons employing thousands of Americans, or buying US Lemons and enabling the government to do its job. What do lemon wedge investors do to help the economy? Absolutely nothing. Unlike real investors lemon wedge hoarders are purely in it for themselves, and serve no purpose to society whatsoever.

Leopold B. Scotch's picture

Maybe we all need to give savers more props, but that always falls on deaf ears among the consumption is resurection crowd.

You can't blame a saver for trying to protect his past sacrifice reflected in savings.  Unless you're looking to loot from that there saver.

RSBriggs's picture

Maybe substitute "Lingerie" for socks?  Or, maybe, combine with the lemon post, and use an underwear themed "lemon wedgies"?  Or lemon flavored Lingerie?  Sorry - I really suck at doing re-writes.

EvlTheCat's picture

Sorry, I disagree. Anyone suggesting lingerie and/or women's underwear as a suitable substitute for stocks is an astute rewriter in my book.  If you make them edible then cover the female performers in gold leaf we can submit a preview screening to the high end adult entertainment market. We'll call it "Buffett The Bullion Slayer Versus The Glistening Gold Cube".

Tuco Benedicto Pacifico Juan Maria Ramirez's picture

Gold is not an "investment".  Gold is "insurance" against the malevolence of governments and the ignorance of individuals such as you.  Have a nice day playing with your paper assets!


silverserfer's picture

Gold is a physical manifestation of truth and endurance. Cream rises to the top and gold has over 1000's of years proven itself to be the perfect store of value for a man's labors. Seek truth and rightousness  in what you do and you will find silver and gold set you free.

A82EBA's picture

It's how you say '..take your TARP, bailouts. endless QE and central planning..and SHOVE IT'

grid-b-gone's picture

Yep, gold can't be TARPed.

Elmer Fudd's picture

MDB, just to be clear, you realize that secondary market purchasers of bonds and equities aren't really putting money into companies or govt coffers, right?   Just trying to understand your level of knowledge about how the capital markets work.

hapless's picture

"Just trying to understand your level of knowledge about how the capital markets work."

Really? I thought his/her/its level of understanding is fairly obvious.

RichardP's picture

Elmer, I get your larger point.  But, for those who may not be clear on this - assume you have equity in Company A and have a desparate need to exchange the equity for money.  If nobody will buy those securities from you and Company A buys them, Company A will have less cash.  If I buy those securities from you, Company A gets to keep its cash.  So - the secondary market doesn't put more money into the companies coffers, but it acts in a way that allows companies to keep the money they have.

It is not too much of a stretch to think that, without a secondary market, companies would have a difficult time selling bonds or equities without some sort of promise to buy them back under defined circumstances such as emergencies.  That creates a level of financial uncertainty for the company that the secondary  market serves to take away.

Elmer Fudd's picture

RP, sure, the secondary market (used to?) exists as a pricing mechanism where we all (used to?) try and put a valuation on a business entity, and sure, I'll agree that as a pricing mechanism, it serves the function of putting a value on the equity-issuing or debt capacity of said entity.  

But so many people confuse the primary market functions with secondary market functions I had to raise the point.  



RichardP's picture

Yes.  I was adding to what you were saying, rather than taking issue with it.

MsCreant's picture


I'll bite. Let's see if you can stay in character. Let's see if you can respond to a genuine question.

Is there not a time to withdraw support from the system? If investors cannot trust the market place (because of market manipulation and outright theft and vaporization), is it not time to shut down the market place and withdraw participation? And if one seeks to do that, doesn't gold and silver and the like serve a very important market function by storing value until such a time as the sytem is permitted to fail, and be reborn? 

Solon the Destroyer's picture

Hi MsCreant,

Love MDB's spooferino posts as do you, but I think his sarcasm makes the point your response misses:

How is investing in gold removing it from the marketplace?  It is in fact preserving capital for the marketplace.  We are actually doing the world a duty and by acting in our self-interest, also acting selflessly (is that the invisible reach-around??).

We may be removing that capital from the present financial system, but we are not removing it from the greater economy or the world in general. In fact we are preserving it so that our economies may rise once again.

MillionDollarBonus_'s picture

You know, I don't entirely disagree with your central point. There have been times where I've been frustrated with my equity portfolio performance, and I've thought: "wouldn't it be great to just put everything into US Treasuries and just go off the grid?". I understand that feeling - I really do.

But then I realized something important. Pessimistic negative thinking is a self-fulfilling prophecy. If everyone piled into gold and silver, then credit would collapse and everything would crash, just as you feared. Storing value as dollars in the bank however, allows the bank to create credit to finance growth and spending. Investing in stocks and bonds produces real tangible value and reduces the chance of your apocalyptic scenario. I choose to be part of the solution, not the problem, and if I go down with the ship, at least I’ll be remembered as hero, and not a selfish goldbug trying to profit from the misery of others.

Bay of Pigs's picture

LOL, the ultimate ZH sock puppet.

Sorry, you're not fooling me MDB.

akak's picture

Well, Tyler needed somebody as the obligatory bad guy and lightning rod for indignation here, after the ZH demise of JohnnyBravo, RedNeckRepugnicants (and assorted sockpuppets), Leo Kolinasskiss, RobotLemming and Robert Bruschetta.

To paraphrase a famous quote, "If the trolls did not exist, ZeroHedge would have to create them".

fuu's picture

I miss Rubber Balls.

akak's picture

Leo was much more fun to mock in his Keynesian and statist insanity, though.

His self-indulgent pity fests, however, were squalid and embarrassing in the extreme.

Bay of Pigs's picture

And what ever became of Spaulding Smailes and William the Bastard?

akak's picture

Somewhere, on a basement computer, an unshaven, pajama-clad, gold-hating troll checks the prices of silver and gold on Kitco and howls at the moon ....

"But, but, but, the shit is everywhere
And it only costs $5 to dig from the ground!"

Crisismode's picture

Ah, you would be referring to Jon Nadler, no doubt?


Bay of Pigs's picture

No, that was a Math Man quote. Hes long gone too.

Burnbright's picture

You know it is funny that you guys mention it, what did ever happen to robotrader? That guy was around since zerohedge was a blog. I am a little shocked that I do not see him around more.

akak's picture

His user account no longer exists, which indicates that he has been banned.

But honestly, was "he" ever anything more than the shallow, kneejerk stocks pimp and troll that I remember him to be?  I always assumed that RobotTrader was just a sockpuppet which Tyler(s) used to antagonize us just for fun.

Solon the Destroyer's picture


Well the system is going to go down anyways, whether you leave your capital in it or not -- this is a mathematical certainty.  You can come to grips with that certainty and be a hero and preserve your capital for your family and your community, or you can succumb to the grand confidence game and participate in the crash.

We call those people suckers.

Abitdodgie's picture

MDB how is your Facebook stock working out , your spawn most be real proud of daddy.

Temporalist's picture

MDB already has an alterego that is a Super Hero in his own mind and his name is MarketDunceBagholder.  His motto is "Holding the bag till the very end!"

CCanuck's picture

I now understand your solution, does your facebook investment count as a charitable donation to the economy and country?

So you help the economy with your investments?

MDB you are a swell guy, giving till it hurts eh?


KingTut's picture

Fine.  Be the solution!  I'll be sure to drop a $100 bill into your tin cup when I see you begging on the street. Too bad it won't buy you a cup of coffee.  

enoch_root's picture

Actually it is very selfish to presume you as an individual can somehow change the direction of massive economic forces, not to mention arrogant, narcissistic and delusionary.


The end has already been written with mathematics long ago, by others, when they made greedy, hasty choices like Fed. Res. 'banking systems', 'elastic money' and Social Security 'safety nets'. Don't be fearful of the future, feel the universal force washing over you, cleansing through you (like an enema).


Embrace the collapse.



RichardP's picture

You don't have children, do you.