• Knave Dave
    05/23/2016 - 18:16
    This past Thursday marked the one-year anniversary of the US stock market’s death when stocks saw their last high. Market bulls have spent a year looking like the walking dead. They’ve...

Presenting Warren Buffett's "Gold Cube"

Tyler Durden's picture


Recall from Warren Buffett's 2011 letter to investors:

Today the world’s gold stock is about 170,000 metric tons. If all of this gold were melded together, it would form a cube of about 68 feet per side. (Picture it fitting comfortably within a baseball infield.) At $1,750 per ounce – gold’s price as I write this – its value would be $9.6 trillion....You can fondle the cube, but it will not respond.

Below is what said gold cube containing all the world's gold would look like, with distinctions for the various types of gold currently in existence:

source: Deutsche

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Wed, 09/26/2012 - 15:41 | 2833198 akak
akak's picture


I'd appreciate it if he would bring me back my hubcaps...

Since they were engraved with the name "Cesar", Jesus rendered unto Cesar accordingly.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 16:58 | 2833559 RichardP
RichardP's picture


Wed, 09/26/2012 - 15:43 | 2833205 buckethead
buckethead's picture

Is there still a market for hub caps? Well, I suppose spinning hubcaps...

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 14:00 | 2832848 Pure Evil
Pure Evil's picture


Wed, 09/26/2012 - 13:56 | 2832826 What is The Hedge
What is The Hedge's picture

Still laughing. Loved it!!!

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 14:47 | 2833006 mick_richfield
mick_richfield's picture

If I recall correctly, Jesus said:

Render unto Caesar what is Caesar's.  But it looks like this American Gold Eagle says 'Liberty' on the front.  So there you go.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 17:12 | 2833603 RichardP
RichardP's picture


And this also:

And Jesus said unto them, "And whom do you say that I am?"

They replied, "You are the eschatological manifestation of the ground of our being, the ontological foundation of the context of our very selfhood revealed."

And Jesus replied, "Wha ... ?"


Wed, 09/26/2012 - 14:53 | 2833029 Grinder74
Grinder74's picture

Jesus didn't say that.  But Mohammed did say, "An ounce of gold is worth a dozen 9-year old brides."

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 15:22 | 2833119 are we there yet
are we there yet's picture

He Also married one of his own biological daughters as part of his harem.  Not a secret. So many creepy things from that guy.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 15:33 | 2833150 CrockettAlmanac.com
CrockettAlmanac.com's picture

Abraham married his sister. Mary was likely about twelve years old when she became pregnant and married Joseph.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 17:22 | 2833653 RichardP
RichardP's picture

Sarah was Abraham's half-sister.  Same father; different mothers.  Around that time it was acceptable to take half-sister as first wife and cousin as later, second wife.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 17:29 | 2833684 CrockettAlmanac.com
CrockettAlmanac.com's picture

If the "it was acceptable at that time" excuse works for Abraham then it ought to work for Mohammed as well.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 20:51 | 2834201 RichardP
RichardP's picture

Whatever you are refering to, was it acceptable at the time of Mohammed?

My point of acceptability includes the fact that there were other kings/leaders of people at the time of Abraham who had a half-sister as first wife and in later years a cousin as other wife.  Whatever you are refering to with Mohammed, can you point to other notables at his level doing the same thing at that time?

Thu, 09/27/2012 - 04:43 | 2834691 CrockettAlmanac.com
CrockettAlmanac.com's picture

The betrothal of girls to adult males has been common in many times and places including the Middle East in the 7th century.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 13:53 | 2832814 CPL
CPL's picture

It started strong but lost the usual twist in the end.


Maybe something like.


Sock “investors” do absolutely nothing for this country whatsoever.  Hoarding socks instead of investing in hoserie and stockings demonstrates a sick narcissism and complete disregard for building the economy. Real investors actually help people by investing in blue sock companies employing thousands of Americans, or buying US Socks and enabling the government to do its job. What do sock investors do to help the economy? Absolutely nothing. Unlike real investors sock hoarders are purely in it for themselves, and serve no purpose to society whatsoever.

I think it needs a rewrite though.. 

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 13:59 | 2832846 zendome
zendome's picture

How about:


Lemon wedge “investors” do absolutely nothing for this country whatsoever.  Hoarding lemon wedges instead of investing in highballs and sparkling water demonstrates a sick narcissism and complete disregard for building the economy. Real investors actually help people by investing in yellow lemons employing thousands of Americans, or buying US Lemons and enabling the government to do its job. What do lemon wedge investors do to help the economy? Absolutely nothing. Unlike real investors lemon wedge hoarders are purely in it for themselves, and serve no purpose to society whatsoever.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 14:10 | 2832894 Random_Robert
Random_Robert's picture

Fucking awesome.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 14:05 | 2832868 Leopold B. Scotch
Leopold B. Scotch's picture

Maybe we all need to give savers more props, but that always falls on deaf ears among the consumption is resurection crowd.

You can't blame a saver for trying to protect his past sacrifice reflected in savings.  Unless you're looking to loot from that there saver.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 14:11 | 2832878 RSBriggs
RSBriggs's picture

Maybe substitute "Lingerie" for socks?  Or, maybe, combine with the lemon post, and use an underwear themed "lemon wedgies"?  Or lemon flavored Lingerie?  Sorry - I really suck at doing re-writes.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 14:34 | 2832960 EvlTheCat
EvlTheCat's picture

Sorry, I disagree. Anyone suggesting lingerie and/or women's underwear as a suitable substitute for stocks is an astute rewriter in my book.  If you make them edible then cover the female performers in gold leaf we can submit a preview screening to the high end adult entertainment market. We'll call it "Buffett The Bullion Slayer Versus The Glistening Gold Cube".

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 13:55 | 2832819 Tuco Benedicto ...
Tuco Benedicto Pacifico Juan Maria Ramirez's picture

Gold is not an "investment".  Gold is "insurance" against the malevolence of governments and the ignorance of individuals such as you.  Have a nice day playing with your paper assets!


Wed, 09/26/2012 - 15:05 | 2833067 silverserfer
silverserfer's picture

Gold is a physical manifestation of truth and endurance. Cream rises to the top and gold has over 1000's of years proven itself to be the perfect store of value for a man's labors. Seek truth and rightousness  in what you do and you will find silver and gold set you free.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 13:57 | 2832831 A82EBA
A82EBA's picture

It's how you say '..take your TARP, bailouts. endless QE and central planning..and SHOVE IT'

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 16:22 | 2833411 grid-b-gone
grid-b-gone's picture

Yep, gold can't be TARPed.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 13:57 | 2832833 Elmer Fudd
Elmer Fudd's picture

MDB, just to be clear, you realize that secondary market purchasers of bonds and equities aren't really putting money into companies or govt coffers, right?   Just trying to understand your level of knowledge about how the capital markets work.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 16:45 | 2833511 hapless
hapless's picture

"Just trying to understand your level of knowledge about how the capital markets work."

Really? I thought his/her/its level of understanding is fairly obvious.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 17:34 | 2833708 RichardP
RichardP's picture

Elmer, I get your larger point.  But, for those who may not be clear on this - assume you have equity in Company A and have a desparate need to exchange the equity for money.  If nobody will buy those securities from you and Company A buys them, Company A will have less cash.  If I buy those securities from you, Company A gets to keep its cash.  So - the secondary market doesn't put more money into the companies coffers, but it acts in a way that allows companies to keep the money they have.

It is not too much of a stretch to think that, without a secondary market, companies would have a difficult time selling bonds or equities without some sort of promise to buy them back under defined circumstances such as emergencies.  That creates a level of financial uncertainty for the company that the secondary  market serves to take away.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 19:13 | 2833985 Elmer Fudd
Elmer Fudd's picture

RP, sure, the secondary market (used to?) exists as a pricing mechanism where we all (used to?) try and put a valuation on a business entity, and sure, I'll agree that as a pricing mechanism, it serves the function of putting a value on the equity-issuing or debt capacity of said entity.  

But so many people confuse the primary market functions with secondary market functions I had to raise the point.  



Wed, 09/26/2012 - 23:06 | 2834420 RichardP
RichardP's picture

Yes.  I was adding to what you were saying, rather than taking issue with it.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 13:57 | 2832835 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture


I'll bite. Let's see if you can stay in character. Let's see if you can respond to a genuine question.

Is there not a time to withdraw support from the system? If investors cannot trust the market place (because of market manipulation and outright theft and vaporization), is it not time to shut down the market place and withdraw participation? And if one seeks to do that, doesn't gold and silver and the like serve a very important market function by storing value until such a time as the sytem is permitted to fail, and be reborn? 

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 14:36 | 2832936 Solon the Destroyer
Solon the Destroyer's picture

Hi MsCreant,

Love MDB's spooferino posts as do you, but I think his sarcasm makes the point your response misses:

How is investing in gold removing it from the marketplace?  It is in fact preserving capital for the marketplace.  We are actually doing the world a duty and by acting in our self-interest, also acting selflessly (is that the invisible reach-around??).

We may be removing that capital from the present financial system, but we are not removing it from the greater economy or the world in general. In fact we are preserving it so that our economies may rise once again.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 14:37 | 2832968 MillionDollarBonus_
MillionDollarBonus_'s picture

You know, I don't entirely disagree with your central point. There have been times where I've been frustrated with my equity portfolio performance, and I've thought: "wouldn't it be great to just put everything into US Treasuries and just go off the grid?". I understand that feeling - I really do.

But then I realized something important. Pessimistic negative thinking is a self-fulfilling prophecy. If everyone piled into gold and silver, then credit would collapse and everything would crash, just as you feared. Storing value as dollars in the bank however, allows the bank to create credit to finance growth and spending. Investing in stocks and bonds produces real tangible value and reduces the chance of your apocalyptic scenario. I choose to be part of the solution, not the problem, and if I go down with the ship, at least I’ll be remembered as hero, and not a selfish goldbug trying to profit from the misery of others.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 14:38 | 2832984 Bay of Pigs
Bay of Pigs's picture

LOL, the ultimate ZH sock puppet.

Sorry, you're not fooling me MDB.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 14:55 | 2833038 akak
akak's picture

Well, Tyler needed somebody as the obligatory bad guy and lightning rod for indignation here, after the ZH demise of JohnnyBravo, RedNeckRepugnicants (and assorted sockpuppets), Leo Kolinasskiss, RobotLemming and Robert Bruschetta.

To paraphrase a famous quote, "If the trolls did not exist, ZeroHedge would have to create them".

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 15:07 | 2833073 fuu
fuu's picture

I miss Rubber Balls.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 15:18 | 2833106 akak
akak's picture

Leo was much more fun to mock in his Keynesian and statist insanity, though.

His self-indulgent pity fests, however, were squalid and embarrassing in the extreme.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 15:32 | 2833145 Bay of Pigs
Bay of Pigs's picture

And what ever became of Spaulding Smailes and William the Bastard?

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 15:57 | 2833219 akak
akak's picture

Somewhere, on a basement computer, an unshaven, pajama-clad, gold-hating troll checks the prices of silver and gold on Kitco and howls at the moon ....

"But, but, but, the shit is everywhere
And it only costs $5 to dig from the ground!"

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 21:01 | 2834216 Crisismode
Crisismode's picture

Ah, you would be referring to Jon Nadler, no doubt?


Wed, 09/26/2012 - 22:55 | 2834404 Bay of Pigs
Bay of Pigs's picture

No, that was a Math Man quote. Hes long gone too.

Thu, 09/27/2012 - 01:17 | 2834564 Burnbright
Burnbright's picture

You know it is funny that you guys mention it, what did ever happen to robotrader? That guy was around since zerohedge was a blog. I am a little shocked that I do not see him around more.

Thu, 09/27/2012 - 12:31 | 2835742 akak
akak's picture

His user account no longer exists, which indicates that he has been banned.

But honestly, was "he" ever anything more than the shallow, kneejerk stocks pimp and troll that I remember him to be?  I always assumed that RobotTrader was just a sockpuppet which Tyler(s) used to antagonize us just for fun.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 14:40 | 2832986 Solon the Destroyer
Solon the Destroyer's picture


Well the system is going to go down anyways, whether you leave your capital in it or not -- this is a mathematical certainty.  You can come to grips with that certainty and be a hero and preserve your capital for your family and your community, or you can succumb to the grand confidence game and participate in the crash.

We call those people suckers.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 14:55 | 2833035 Abitdodgie
Abitdodgie's picture

MDB how is your Facebook stock working out , your spawn most be real proud of daddy.

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 15:42 | 2833194 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

MDB already has an alterego that is a Super Hero in his own mind and his name is MarketDunceBagholder.  His motto is "Holding the bag till the very end!"

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 16:12 | 2833363 CCanuck
CCanuck's picture

I now understand your solution, does your facebook investment count as a charitable donation to the economy and country?

So you help the economy with your investments?

MDB you are a swell guy, giving till it hurts eh?


Wed, 09/26/2012 - 16:33 | 2833457 HeliBen
HeliBen's picture


Wed, 09/26/2012 - 16:55 | 2833552 KingTut
KingTut's picture

Fine.  Be the solution!  I'll be sure to drop a $100 bill into your tin cup when I see you begging on the street. Too bad it won't buy you a cup of coffee.  

Wed, 09/26/2012 - 17:34 | 2833710 enoch_root
enoch_root's picture

Actually it is very selfish to presume you as an individual can somehow change the direction of massive economic forces, not to mention arrogant, narcissistic and delusionary.


The end has already been written with mathematics long ago, by others, when they made greedy, hasty choices like Fed. Res. 'banking systems', 'elastic money' and Social Security 'safety nets'. Don't be fearful of the future, feel the universal force washing over you, cleansing through you (like an enema).


Embrace the collapse.



Wed, 09/26/2012 - 17:39 | 2833735 RichardP
RichardP's picture

You don't have children, do you.

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!