This page has been archived and commenting is disabled.

Presenting The World's Biggest Hedge Fund You Have Never Heard Of

Tyler Durden's picture


The world's largest hedge fund is not located in the top floor of some shiny, floor-to-ceiling glass clad skyscraper in New York, London, Hong Kong or Shanghai. It isn't in some sprawling mansion in Greenwich or Stamford which houses a state of the art trading desk behind a crocodile-filled moat. Instead it can be found in tiny, nondescript office in Suite 225 located on 730 Sandhill Road in Reno, Nevada.

"That's not possible" one may say - the world's largest hedge fund is Ray Dalio's Bridgewater, which at last check had about $100 billion in AUM (and which has so far had a less than stellar performance in 2012, underperforming the S&P by a substantial margin). Turns out it is: the fund which was at $117.2 billion as of June 30, and which has lately been growing at a pace of about $15 billion per quarter (which would put it at about $130 billion currently), is none other than Braeburn Capital, a Nevada-based asset management corporation.

Who is Braeburn?

Braeburn is a subsidiary of another far more famous company, which since 2006 has had one simple task: manage the cash of the parent company.

At Braeburn's inception, the cash pile was modest, yet absolutely massive in unlevered terms, at just over $10 billion. Fast forward 6 years, and the massive cash pile has now grown to be epically gargantuan. Of course, the parent company in question is none other than Apple, whose publicly reported cash horde at June 30, 2012 was a whopping $117,221,000,000. This is the AUM of Braeburn.

Any substantial follow up diligence on Braeburn will not reveal much if anything.

CapitalIQ has the following description of the firm: "Braeburn Capital Inc. is the asset management arm of Apple Inc. The firm invests in the public equity markets. Braeburn Capital Inc. was founded in 2006 and is based in Reno, Nevada." And that's it - there is no breakdown of which "public equity market" investments Braeburn is invested in, as is to be expected.

Bloomberg provides the following minimalist information:

Some more useful information cn be found in the Nevada Annual Report of tax-filing entities:

  • Filing Status: Active    
  • Date Filed: 10/03/2005
  • Type: Domestic Corporation    
  • File Number: E0667452005-7

It also lists the firm's principals:

Gary Wipfler
730 Sandhill Road
Suite 225
Reno, NV 89521

Gene Levoff
730 Sandhill Road
Suite 225
Reno, NV 89521

Michael Shapiro
730 Sandhill Road
Suite 225
Reno, NV 89521

The LinkedIn profile of Braeburn CIO Steve Johnson is also rather bland:

As is that of Braeburn Portfolio Manager Ted Mulvaney, who before taking over capital allocation of tens of billions worked at a fund named for a Douglas Adams planet.

Oddly enough, the only actual personnel link between Braeburn and Apple can be found in the profile of principal Gary Wipfler who just happens to be the official Treasurer, and thus as expected, the person responsible for the mega cash stash of the behemoth tech company.

For some other clues on Braeburn one has to go to the NYT, and a certain article discussing AAPL's ability to legally and quite successfully bypass American corporate tax laws.

In 2006, as Apple’s bank accounts and stock price were rising, company executives came here to Reno and established a subsidiary named Braeburn Capital to manage and invest the company’s cash. Braeburn is a variety of apple that is simultaneously sweet and tart.


Today, Braeburn’s offices are down a narrow hallway inside a bland building that sits across from an abandoned restaurant. Inside, there are posters of candy-colored iPods and a large Apple insignia, as well as a handful of desks and computer terminals.


When someone in the United States buys an iPhone, iPad or other Apple product, a portion of the profits from that sale is often deposited into accounts controlled by Braeburn, and then invested in stocks, bonds or other financial instruments, say company executives. Then, when those investments turn a profit, some of it is shielded from tax authorities in California by virtue of Braeburn’s Nevada address.


Since founding Braeburn, Apple has earned more than $2.5 billion in interest and dividend income on its cash reserves and investments around the globe.

Naturally, Apple is less than eager to discuss the role of its Nevada asset manager:

Apple declined to comment on its Nevada operations. Privately, some executives said it was unfair to criticize the company for reducing its tax bill when thousands of other companies acted similarly. If Apple volunteered to pay more in taxes, it would put itself at a competitive disadvantage, they argued, and do a disservice to its shareholders.

There is much more in the NYT article, but in short, while Apple for now uses Braeburn primarily in its capacity to find legal tax loophole all around the world and avoid paying taxes, there is no denying that with a cash balance that in a two years may be well over $200 billion, applying even a modest amount of leverage would make AAPL the best capitalized bank, mutual fund or asset manager in the world.

What's more, Braeburn has no reporting obligations: there is no Investment Advisor Public Disclosure (IAPD) entry on Braeburn for the logical reason that it is not an investment advisor: it merely manages an ungodly amount of cash for AAPL's millions of shareholders. There is also no SEC filing 13-F filing on Braeburn's holdings. As such, not confied by the limitations of being a "long-only", it is in its full right to hold any assets it feels like, up to and including CDS on housing, puts on Samsung, or Constant Maturity Swaps that pay if the 10 Year collapses. It just doesn't have to report any of them.

Nobody knows: and that's the beauty of Braeburn. It is the world's largest hedge fund that is not really a hedge fund, nobody has heard of, and nobody knows just what assets it holds.

Which is precisely what Apple wants. Incidentally, what Apple probably wants more is to keep the status quo as is. However, with the topic of finding effective tax loopholes which are perfectly legal, yet which apparently are unfair, serving as the basis of the entire presidential race to date, what Apple can be absolutely certain of is that once the farce culminating on November 6 is over, the government's eye will finally turn to minimizing "externalities" among such companies which have been able to pass through corporate tax savings to end consumers by abiding within the legal system that countless other muppet congressmen, senators and presidents have developed over the ages.

Because while AAPL may have built the iPhone, very soon it will be only fair that it share its profits acquired over the years, and thus its cash balance, which at last check was double that of the US Treasury, with the general public.

At that point Braeburn will almost certainly be a household name.


- advertisements -

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.
Sun, 09/30/2012 - 14:54 | 2843289 agent default
agent default's picture

When I read the title I though the article was going to be about the FED.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:10 | 2843314 Popo
Popo's picture

... and I thought the words "tax evasion" would be used more frequently.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:22 | 2843329 CPL
CPL's picture

I know Ted from the universe.  He is/was a good tech and had the annoying habit of being right a lot.  lol  I can see why braeburn does well.  Ted is a sharp dude.  The rest of them are lawyers probably hovering around him collecting crumbs and attempting to understand logic and reason.  He's good people and tech.  Funny as well, has lots of war stories.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:30 | 2843345 Buckaroo Banzai
Buckaroo Banzai's picture

He worked at Ariba. That's funny.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:29 | 2843515 Dr Benway
Dr Benway's picture

So can this fund buy AAPL? I mean, that would be the logical course of action if you have CONfidence in your company. Eat your own load, so to speak.

In Australia we have companies doing just that, check out my slideshow:

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 22:20 | 2843965 markmotive
markmotive's picture

AAPL needs to increase its share repurchase program.


Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:08 | 2844056 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture



...puts on Samsung...

Funny.  Probably true, but still funny.

Mon, 10/01/2012 - 00:17 | 2844147 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

OT'ish but really interesting story...


India unlocks treasure trove of gold as farmers sell

Laxmibai Karanure sifts through the heavy bangles and necklaces that make up her life savings, working out which pieces to sell from the 100 grams of gold she holds to tide her family over during the drought at their farm.


The 55-year-old Karanure's heirlooms will add to a booming recycling trade, which could account for up to half of India's consumption this year and boost a fledgling refining industry.


The surge in recycling also comes as India looks set to be overtaken by China as the world's biggest consumer of gold, after a hike in import duties in March and a rapidly weakening rupee pushed local gold prices to record highs....


Interesting times indeed.


Mon, 10/01/2012 - 00:26 | 2844154 Dalago
Dalago's picture

Biggest hedge fund?  Trying to dodge taxes.  There's an ap for that.  iHedge.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 20:22 | 2843786 HedgingTexas
HedgingTexas's picture

it just got bought by SAP AG for $4.3 billion. Sounds like it was a decently-sized company. 

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:38 | 2843361 Buckaroo Banzai
Buckaroo Banzai's picture

Hey CPL, why don't you tell your friend Ted to start buying gold. A LOT of gold.

And silver too, while he's at it.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:57 | 2843390 CPL
CPL's picture

He's not where the buck stops, he makes sure the people with money don't buy turkey's.  

A Portfolio manager is the same as Product Manager, you are air traffic control.  Allow things in, allow things out.  It's the brains of the business.  Everything around the man can be replaced but him because he would be the Alpha and Omega of business planning.  CEO's. CIO's...worthless without brains.  

Ted would qualify for that.  He's seen a lot of bad ideas walking through the crucible of  He's got the pedigree and the training in pragmatic thought processes to make a good purchase decision.  We all, well anyone old enough, watched a lot of people get badly hurt in  Braeburn has been releasing quite a bit of information on inflationary hedges and silver/gold are part of their portfolio.

Last time I seen him had just gone Dot.bomb and everyone was getting very drunk for a couple of months trying to figure out what the fuck to do next.


Well, lets put it this way.  If given the choice on picking someone to help build a shed out of the Braeburn team, Tim is the only one qualified to identify nails, hammers and "work".  Ayn Rand was right, 1 out of 10 keeps it running.  Without Tim, Braeburn is a very small liability.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:02 | 2843394 Buckaroo Banzai
Buckaroo Banzai's picture

He's got the classic post-dotcom-bubble 2-year gap in his resume.

Just like someone else I know! (looks in mirror...)

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:57 | 2843482 FoxMulder
FoxMulder's picture

I'm betting his best idea is to be long AAPL.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:47 | 2843537 NewThor
NewThor's picture

Better yet, he should go long the companies Apple is about to sign deals with.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 18:58 | 2843640 Oracle of Kypseli
Oracle of Kypseli's picture

I can't wait for the i-car and the i-house.

Come on AAPL I am giving you ideas. Built an all inclusive state of the art tech savvy box house in China and have it flown in. Provide your own mortgage and blow away all these stick built on site builders. Call me I have the basic design ready.


Sun, 09/30/2012 - 19:00 | 2843661 Doña K
Doña K's picture

Apple villages? Apple parking lots?

Mon, 10/01/2012 - 00:15 | 2844145 3ringmike
3ringmike's picture

apple orchards

Mon, 10/01/2012 - 00:12 | 2844144 lunaticfringe
lunaticfringe's picture

In the new America, the one without a rule of law, this seems to be a solid idea.

Mon, 10/01/2012 - 03:39 | 2844269 monkeyboy
monkeyboy's picture

Better yet, he should go long the companies Apple is about to sign deals with.




Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:01 | 2843490 CPL
CPL's picture

It sucked ass but the money was good enough to start other gigs, also gave some of those looking to jump out of the industry a chance for a clean break.  

Hard to argue with interviewing someone stating their entire industry blew up because of poorly managed financial instrumentation.  Everyone got a break and at least you got to spend it with some neat people (one of the programmers I drank with expanded his musical ability, PM's turned into Handymen, etc.).  

Somehow now with the same thing happening I'm seeing some of the worst side of people now.  Media has the under tone of lazy unemployed, I see the situation as a grab bag.  There are all these senior states-people type resources with decades of experience waiting for an opportunity to shine.  Millions of solid planners and work horses.  I cannot believe the same intiatives aren't being done like dot.bomb.  Peer sessions, pink slip partied, startup's and goes.  All that.

I suppose with all the laws in place now about terrorist shit tier laws it's a moot point.  

The environment is so restricted in terms of socialization.  Little wonder people feel alone and desperate while on the dole.  I don't recall that being the case after at all.  Everyone was broke but understood that the safest place is in the nerd herd.  Companies like AMD, Apple, Microsoft and the thousands of little companies were built with next to nothing but the idea "we fucked up once, we'll do it again but without the flying everyone out to Mexico for a business retreat".  Reins were tighter and products were better suited to a practical market place.


of course it doesn't explain FB or LNKD...or the up and coming eHarmony IPO (seriously...who...what...why)....rambling

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 22:52 | 2844003 Cathartes Aura
Cathartes Aura's picture

I like the Microsoft story where BillyGates is "discovered" by the .gov, and told he can become unbelievably, fabulously wealthy, BUT has to make his system so buggy the .gov snoops have a backdoor to spy on the global interwebs network. . . oh, and he has to put huge sums of that fiat into foundations to fund the vaccines & pharma for "3rd world" (you listenin' amrka?) peeps - y'know, the sweat activated vaccines, and other grand things that can be stealth sprayed no consent needed/sought.  and didn't Warren give Billy's "foundation" a billion and a half of HIS winnings?  ^^

I'm also fond of imagining SteveJobs got a similar offer, providing he assisted the equalising of China© in the race for global pwnage.

sure wouldn't be surprised to find things tank for the Corp/Core, when the time is ripe.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:09 | 2844061 Jani
Jani's picture

Good thing Google didn't sell out, does no evil and stayed the most proficient SE : - )

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 22:59 | 2844039 Seer
Seer's picture

APPL was/is the last straw.  FB and others like it were just folks puking after the last party...

The reason why stuff isn't picking up is because there WON'T be sufficient demand.  People have loaded up on all they can carry (to their graves); the debt load is what kills it all, kills future growth.  And, face it, NO company is based on stasis.

This is NOT a drill...

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 22:44 | 2844004 Big Swinging Richard
Big Swinging Richard's picture


I worked at one of the other tech companies whose Treasury HQ are in Reno for several years.  Ted is very much a standup guy.  I also know Steve, who is no longer with the firm, having moved on earlier this year.  True that about just trying to make sure you don't screw up.  Most Treasury Mgrs. have huge career risk and don't get paid for making a few extra bps through security selection.  The IPS of the firm dictates the amount of risk taken.  Most corporate Treasurers are accountants, no PMs, so not much risk at all is taken with regards to equity exposure, mostly SPY or sub-advised acconts.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:57 | 2844123 CPL
CPL's picture

Good to hear that he's still a good lad and he, LOL, definately landed on his feet.  Good for him.  Say greetings from Silicon Alley and Silicon North.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:04 | 2843397 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

"He's good people". When you don't count the Chicom sweatshops and the "abandoned restaurant across the street". And then there's the ".com war stories". Phew. That globalist stench. 

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:29 | 2843428 CPL
CPL's picture

Correct me if I'm wrong but China opened up that opportuntity and since Apple isn't completely communist yet and took the OFFER to build their shitty tablet overseas to save cash.  I refuse to see that as a big deal.  It's a good thing it happened.


Don't confuse ethics with morals.  You yourself are typing on something a teenager built overseas for a salary well under minimum wage standards.  Believe me, without the ChiCom building all the crap we've got today I hardly believe most here would be able to afford a PC.  My first PC was a Commodore PET, you don't want to know what it cost.  My first mainstream PC was a Sinclair ZX81, it came in pieces and not much else.  It overheated but had a functional Basic language that introduced the markets to standard programming language because nothing like Borland or Microsoft Existed.


People took out home loans against their first PC purchases in the mid 90's when a PC, a shitty PC, would start at around 2k.  Again.  China opened the opportunity to bang your Che drum online.  like everything else in OUR lives, China makes it all.  Think the bowl of rice you eat once in a while isn't tainted by blood?  What do you think Chinese prisoners do while in jail there?  Write political essays?  No.  They make your crap cheap.


And yes, my memory of the man is he's good people. 

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:01 | 2843484 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

Actually, Not. If it were built here, it would be built better...and cost more. And people would have the actual income - instead of plastic debt - to buy the stuff. It's all a Ponzi, bright boy. And your rich friend still sux.  

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:13 | 2843499 CPL
CPL's picture

Oh boy...


Yes it is a Ponzi.

What would blow your mind is you'll soon get the chance to build the equipment with the Fed printing money hand over fist.  That's the plan if you hadn't noticed.  Everyone is going to switch places.  First world becomes third world, third world becomes first world.  So don't sweat the Ponzi, it's there to create jerbs for you and your sensitive needs for Americans to be abused by labour practices.

BTW Tim didn't start rich, he got rich by saving/trading/working (like most of us), his last name is Mulvaney.   He got into schools because, like the rest of us smartie pants, we studied hard and obtained grants/worked shit tier jobs to go to a good school.  Because if you don't do better than your Father in an Irish household you'll never hear the end of it.

So unless there is an Illuminati Jew Bilderburg Bavarian Vatican UFO conspiracy that includes the Irish somehow I would like to know.    Appearently I'm owed some back pay.  lol

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 20:09 | 2843771 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture must be exceptional indeed...I've never seen an Irish male w/o a bottle in hand or mouth. And, no, the jobs are not coming back to Amerikwa. They're going to vaporize along with all other global paper-ponzi artifacts. Invest in lead.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 22:56 | 2844029 CPL
CPL's picture

Thank christ your lead ownership goes as far as your ability to procure it in an inflationary environment.  If you thought gas was expensive, wait until you check out the price of shells.  

You can hole up in a bunker if you want.  In fact I advise you to do so immediately.  There is some really cheap property up in around the Husdons Bay area, Canuck government will even shell out a couple of bucks a month for cost of living allowance.  My plan is to stick it out in my community and do what needs to be done.  I like people I don't have to continiously be armed around and other than the church biddies, nobody is particularily interested in starting a tyranical fiefdom.  Easier hanging out with people that know how to live instead of hide.


Because that's what the survivalist movement is.  It's hiding because you don't have someone standing next to you with share the experience with.  It seems a very lonely idea.  But hey...long canned goods and shotguns it is.  I just see more value in silver, gold, seeds, a metal lathe, an anvil and a hammer.  The world doesn't stop with one piece of bad news or ten thousand pieces.  

In the 1700's while there was a Civil war happening in the infancy of the US, at that exact same moment during a very exciting piece of history there was a little boy in India that didn't know or care because he was eating supper.  I was going to go into a long post about dead cat's in boxes...

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 21:26 | 2843883 shuckster
shuckster's picture

CPL, how do you like the hate fest? I bet it feels good to work your whole life and then watch it all get sucked away from you, watch your colleagues eat dirt. Did you ever consider that maybe part of the problem is all the in fighting? Everyone going after each others throats all the time?

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 22:32 | 2843972 CPL
CPL's picture

It is a question asked by philiosophers in all cultures.  What is the definition of human nature.  Socrates theory on Art is one of my favorites.  Apollo and Dyonisius.  The science being influenced by art, then in turn the science pushes art into new territories.  Conflict is human nature.  To out do the next person, to seek something more.  To cease seeking an answer, regardless of the moral abstract of what is "right", it has launched ships, built rockets and made's the reason for being.  Well, if you want to improve.  Conflict isn't a bad thing.  It's called competition when we as a society see it as moral.  Thievery when it is unjust and society deems it immoral.

The infighting is part of the process to dispose of what works and what doesn't.  I would hate to be on a engineering team that didn't argue about functional, operational and safety issues on a product.  My job is to make sure you as the end consumer get the safest, functional product the team and I work on in a reasonably priced manner.  The fact it's made in China or the US only is decided by one single factor.  Cost.  China opened it's doors and offered space.  Apple doesn't magically obtain space, they have to go through the same crap every other Chinese business does...including bribing the shit out of people/municipality, hiring the retarded nephew of the local mayor, all of it.  Just like the US.  People scream murder when China throws a tariff on goods, or the municipal blood money needs to show up.  Do the same thing in somewhere like California where the tax laws changed...well, people leave.

There is a point where the conflict just drives people away.  The US suffers the same issues as Ethopia.  Displaced communities.  Name a city in the US without a tent city?  How did that happen?  Certainly wasn't a lack of moral fibre, the law books are full of ridiculous laws on the subject.  Taxes?  nope...lots of those too.  Four levels of them:  Fed, State, County, Municipality...and if you are lucky enough to live in on municipality.


On conflict.  To a passive eye a field is nothing but a field.  Maybe a back ground to a pleasant stroll.  Perhaps it inspires a painting, a photo and poem.  Maybe it is the cause of self reflection.  The field is just a field.  It is very pretty.

To a biologist however, they see conflict in the field.  Plants pushing and shoving each other fighting for sunlight and resources.  Bugs at war continiuously.  Animals acting as the apex to eat the bugs.  

We are no different, our motivations of resource gathering are similar.  The mechanical process, resources and perhaps scale (that is debatable though, there is a fungus the size of california in california and oregon and Washington state.)...that's where we differ from ants, birds.  We have to build stuff with resources, to obtain resources to distribute resources.  Obviously the hot topic is oil with some whispering of food being on the radar soon because of poor growing conditions the world over.


With 7.2 billion of us the idea that there won't be a conflict to provide scarce resources is lunacy.  This isn't a battle you get to sit out either and watch on TV, it has already happened and will continue to happen until there are less hands than resources available.  

Sucks, but the human race reboots itself constantly.  I cannot name a single historical year there was not someone trying to kill another of our species for something minor.  Again motivations of survival.  The out with the loser and in with the winner.  Deserving has nothing to do with it either.  Again morals are a construct, Tito was appalled by women that smoked and drank, yet somehow he had no issue slaughtering his fellow country men.  It is the darkest of humour. 

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 22:42 | 2844001 Cabreado
Cabreado's picture

So much intelligence, so much understanding...

so much drivel...

And so much efficiency in exposing yourself:

"Again morals are a construct"

Isn't it interesting how the cycle continues, with no one acknowledging even an inkling of responsibility?

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:04 | 2844049 CPL
CPL's picture

Responsibility falls under ethics.  Ethics defines the ownership of a problem.


Morals seek an outcome to ethics.


It is moral to stone a woman death in Islam for slandering and cheating on her husband.

Is it ethical to do so?

Mon, 10/01/2012 - 04:54 | 2844288 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

A question only a Talmudist would ask. 

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:07 | 2844050 shuckster
shuckster's picture

Well, you might be a philosopher, but I'm not. I'm 27 years old and I still have enough life left ahead of me to not just give it up to sit around pondering the universe. You talk about living in the eye of the tornado and working with some of the titans of the industry, so i assumed you were bitter about losing it. i'm bitter already and i don't haven't lost anything - i had nothing in the first place. the only thing i ever had was the money i saved up as marine before going to college. then i went and the money's gone and now i'm done and there aren't shit for jobs and because i'm white i'm not eligible for help. not that i want it. i'd rather go hungry than have to go to wal mart and congregate with the degenerate class. the people who feed off the largesse of those who are too dignified to do so. one thing i know for sure though, is that the answer isn't sitting around wondering what right and wrong are. fucking shit needs to start getting broken. i like what i see in greece. i like when i see a video of a bunch of guys going to all the immigrants' goodie stands and trashing the fucking thing and telling the immigrants to get the fuck out. it might be wrong, it might be mean, or whatever the fuck, but maybe it's time to start being mean

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:31 | 2844089 CPL
CPL's picture

No, I gained.  I did very well.  I kept my "not drinking the koolaid" hat on and did well enough to be comfortable and share what I have with family, friends and community.  I am not even 50 yet. was fun, war stories about CEO's naked on beaches eating sand tripping balls and some other weirdness.  Mostly it was just about building things and it was one hell of a dog fight.

The Titans I know then, weren't Titans, just young guys in hock for student debt like every other genX kid and they have ideas and friends, which is better than money sometimes.  I'd see them at conferences and swap tech tips.  Go for a couple of drinks.  IT as an industry is still very small and it's really busy.  You take the time you can, when you can take time you end up working on the next project that will consume 70 hours a week.  Had no clue what anyone did after  Mulvaney included.  The startups he worked for were my clue.


However, for yourself, you want a career, or at least a place to learn from old men...Oil is the place for you.  The Oil Sands that is.

They are looking for everyone.  If you drive a truck.  Weld.  Mining mining experience want to learn.  Good money, relocation expenses, room/board and nowhere to spend it because you'll be in the middle of bum fuck nowhere.  Which is not that bad of a thing.


Mon, 10/01/2012 - 03:07 | 2844253 Nage42
Nage42's picture

CPL, I'm reading this thread and it resonates with my experiences, so some big +1s


It's a trueism that if you want to succeed you don't have to be god's own genious, you've just got to be willing to do more than the fucktards around you.  In today's world, that means getting off your ass and going to a country that is trying to bootstrap itself into competition with the 1st world, or into a job field that is outside the comfort zone of most people (most are not willing to leave their hometown).

Ditto on the oil path, same goes for mineral/mining exploration, some fairly rough conditions but full costs covered, nowhere to spend your money, and PHAT bonus at the end, no better way to build bank to bootstrap yourself from biblebelt fucktard to expat elite right quick.

It is competition, you just have to be willing to work harder or suffer through more shit than the next guy, it's all on you, stop bitching and get'er done -- complaining that the "immigrant worker" who is succeeding because he's working harder than you is just you LOSING = you're _choosing_ to lose.

Am I right CPL, is that the nub of the matter?





Sun, 09/30/2012 - 21:52 | 2843926 post turtle saver
post turtle saver's picture

"In order to find his equal, an Irishman is forced to talk to God."

Mon, 10/01/2012 - 04:56 | 2844289 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

In order to find his equal, an Irishman drains a bottle...then breaks it over someone's head. 

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:19 | 2844075 Seer
Seer's picture

"What would blow your mind is you'll soon get the chance to build the equipment with the Fed printing money hand over fist.  That's the plan if you hadn't noticed.  Everyone is going to switch places. "

Glad to see someone else getting this...

It'll be packaged up as "bringing jobs home," or other such BS.  And with it will be all sorts of subsidies, er a, "tax breaks" to help fund this corporate shift.

I suspect that things will get hotter over in China and that will be one reason why western corporations will suddenly find themselves as being patriotic (not that I give a crap, as I don't buy any of that nationalistic crap).

BTW - What passes for "smart" today is going to be pretty much worthless tomorrow.

Mon, 10/01/2012 - 00:06 | 2844138 CPL
CPL's picture

The mad hatter would be proud of the tea party setup.  

Dali would have to accessorize the situation with a giraffe.

The Financial situation today is Puce.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 18:10 | 2843577 CPL
CPL's picture

CompassionateFascist, all the information you need to know about the IT industry is right here in black and white.  Bookmark it for special occassions.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 19:44 | 2843729 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

I like to Kirsten Dunst version better. But that's just me.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 22:27 | 2843975 buckethead
buckethead's picture

That was disturbing...


Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:48 | 2844118 CPL
CPL's picture

It's the best description of IT to date.  Best layout ever.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 18:33 | 2843612 Heyoka Bianco
Heyoka Bianco's picture

The good old Zed X. I remember the "Shut Down" mode was simply pulling the plug, and how much fun it was just to make a little sprite man dance.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 21:29 | 2843888 Cabreado
Cabreado's picture

"Funny as well, has lots of war stories."

The funniest thing about the Ted's... is that they have no clue how they contribute to the real wars -- wars of all kinds, and we are losing them all...

If you consider that to be a stretch,

just wait for the punch line.


Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:46 | 2844111 CPL
CPL's picture


So by the existence a portfolio manager in a successful Ponzi is the bane of humanity?  

I could name about a hundred other things that need to be fixed before something as worthless as fiat needs to be considered saved.  

There's my deck for one, it needs another coat of stain and the rain just won't let up.  Then I have to paint the bedroom and show my middle brats how to patch a hole in the wall when they start kicking the crap out of each other.  Need to install the new faucet sitting on top of the fridge that's been there for a month with my wife acting as it's continious advocate to introduce the paradigm of stylish faucet when the old faucet is just fine...I got a list.  There's your punch line.  Change and shit happens.



Mon, 10/01/2012 - 00:19 | 2844149 Cabreado
Cabreado's picture

"the bane of humanity?"

The bane of humanity is the Self-Absorbed -- the Narcissist and the Sociopath.

They share common outward behavior, particularly when challenged...

when their illusion is in jeopardy, they tend to spew nonsensical, irrelevant info...
always about themselves.

Perhaps you've noticed a pattern.


Mon, 10/01/2012 - 01:12 | 2844190 CPL
CPL's picture

Touche.  So what have you done today Cabreado?

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:30 | 2843346 max2205
max2205's picture

Follow the money. Nice job.

Think they roll it back into AAPL?

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:46 | 2843461 CPL
CPL's picture

Probably, industry 500 are all buying back their own shares as a defensive measure while being given a boat load of cash by the Fed.


But that has changed with QE3.  A trader never chases a price.  If you chase a price you run out of bread fast.  Then there is a external pressures to the company purchasing their own stocks.  Customers.


If your customers are broke and you've spent all your money on your own stock, but not just your company, every company has done the same thing and you run out of customers because inflation destroys their capital faster than you can make a product.  

Well, then you have to start selling your own equities to stay alive.  Business management on that level is just as much about putting your competitor in a rat hole to waste their time and energy as it is about bringing something to market.

Again, all companies are doing it.  

QE3 painted them all into a corner.  Not a single industry is going to look the same in a year if they flatline on operating costs and have to start eating their own equities.  More than likely create another bubble in corporate loans like the 80's.  This has all happened before and it will happen again...maybe.  Just won't be with USD as a reserve currency and nations will just simply vanish with QE4 being discussed.

I see it as the Central Banks are printing our freedom, because the more of it printed, the less serious it becomes for the everyday schmoe that's back stopped themselves with physical silver and gold.  Then we've got oil price/availability....LOL...that's going to the be the vicious pitbull that finishes off nations.  Energy supplies should concern people more than Apple.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:28 | 2843513 NewThor
NewThor's picture


TIME = MONEY = warp speed Printing Presses = the value of time - (x)

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:58 | 2843551 Dr Benway
Dr Benway's picture

Yeah but there's a big difference between buying your own stock and retiring it (ie share buyback), and just buying it and keeping it around.

Both actions increase the share price, but in the case of the share buyback retiring of shares leaves more assets per share.

This leads to very different aftereffects when money to buy your own stock runs out. After a share buyback, the higher price per share is backed by higher assets per share. But if shares haven't been retired, the higher share price is vapor, and when supportbuying stops the price must crash.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 19:05 | 2843674 shuckster
shuckster's picture

Indeed, it's a gimmic. And companies like Apple need to get out of the stock trading business and back into the phone making business because their phones are going to shit at an unprecedented rate. Cook is a fucking weasel 

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 19:18 | 2843691 unununium
unununium's picture

> every company has done the same thing

No company is doing it in quite as grand a style as AutoZone.  Yet another quarter where the buyback was 20% more than net income and book value sank 12% deeper into negative territory.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:27 | 2844081 Seer
Seer's picture

Very well stated.  "No customers" is bad for business...

If it wasn't QE3 it would have been something else.  The grim reaper can wear many costumes, but come it always will.

It was all pretty grand, wasn't it?  We were king of the hill!  Silly humans, back to the ground you go! (physical human labor returns)

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:40 | 2843363 seek
seek's picture

The correct term here is tax avoidance. Which is legal. Tax evasion is illegal.

I have little doubt in the next year or two tax code will be re-written to make sure only banks with large donations to the two parties will be able to legally avoid taxes, while producers of any sort will need to provide more to the unproductive classes, as they didn't build that.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:56 | 2843481 Davilis
Davilis's picture

Just follow the example of GE and become a bank.  Done.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 19:06 | 2843675 shuckster
shuckster's picture

Romney's only crime is being obvious about avoiding taxes. GE does it like a pro

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 20:43 | 2843820 Harbanger
Harbanger's picture

I bet Harry Reid is in on this tax scam.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 21:31 | 2843887 shuckster
shuckster's picture

I bet Harry Reid fucks little boys in the ass for pleasure. Because he's a fucking Jew backed Mormon freak. Quick question. What does a Jew love more than a dollar? A Ni&&er of course! Or is it the other way around? Angry yet?

If I were Romney and they started asking for my tax returns, I'd say fuck off. It's my fucking money, keep your dirty chicken wing eating, Jerry Springer watching fingers off of it! Every dollar your pay to the government goes to some jungle bunny sitting on a fucking porch with 12 kids. That money does not go to building rail roads or high ways. It keeps a bunch of nigz fat and happy, parking in the Blue Handicap spot at Walmart in their fucking Tahoes (which they bought on subsidy with YOUR money)

Mon, 10/01/2012 - 20:20 | 2846932 mkkby
mkkby's picture

All of which IS NOT CHARITY. It's the cheapest way to keep society safe from them.

What do you do with millions of sub 85 IQ uneducated, unemployable inner city gangsters?  You can't effectively police them.  You can't put them in concentration camps... yet.  If you let them starve, they'll just use their guns to rampage around.  So you give them a basic living.

Say thanks to China for financing our debt and getting all these services for free.  No, your children will not pay for it.  The debt will be defaulted eventually Greece style.

Mon, 10/01/2012 - 11:13 | 2845110 phalfa5
phalfa5's picture

count on that

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 20:52 | 2843833 Harbanger
Harbanger's picture

PS- Not deducting all of the money Romney gave to charity on his tax returns isn't exactly "avoiding taxes."  But Dingy Harry outright lied and said he has information that Romney hasn't paid any taxes and the liberal MSM gives him a pass.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 20:24 | 2843788 True.North
True.North's picture

Thought this was going to be a new shop setup by Jon Corzine, Brian Sack and the remnants of JPM's CIO division. It's only a matter of time...

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:23 | 2843337 Antifaschistische
Antifaschistische's picture

Id love to know how Braburn may or may not be involved in the ramping of AAPL share prices. Anyone know the techniques they may be using to help AAPL price?

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:13 | 2843407 CPL
CPL's picture

Buying shares in a vapour driven market place.


Seriously.  If you wanted to manipulate a stock price right now outside of the fortune 500, the other 30K+ of listed equities have no buyers and no sellers.  it would cost money though.

Prerequistes are:

Find a shit tier 2-5 buck stock.

Three trade accounts in three different firms.

Each account has it's role.

  • Account 1:  Your bull "trader" (Bait)
  • Account 2:  Your Pivot "trader" (Wedge)
  • Account 3:  Your money maker. (Short)


Take 10k and divide it like so:

Bull Trader:  2k

Pivot:  100 block of something to act as the anchor.  Fix the price to your "buy", whatever that is.

Money:  Think or Swim allows you to reserve short sale blocks for the big day.  7k


Buy 100 blocks upwards over a couple or days, gather share for future short.  Dump the bait, short the sale when it reaches your are done.  This is a miniature and in reverse of the current scheme which involves throwing SS down a big hole..

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:39 | 2843453 Antifaschistische
Antifaschistische's picture

beautiful...thanks CPL

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:27 | 2843511 CPL
CPL's picture

Model it first.


Eclipse Trader has some algo plugin's to mess around with to get a sense of timing, use live feed quotes (lots of free one's built in) and trade from three platforms to "see" the reaction.  Or join one of the trading clubs...Tim Sykes has his Juggernaut up and running.  It's very impressive what he's done with 3 grand.  I think he's up to 6 million himself and the rest of his cronies are doing better than he is.  He's one of the sharpest guys I know of doing the trader club thing.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 18:35 | 2843618 koncaswatch
koncaswatch's picture

Wow! Haven't seen actual trade talk in awhile; some good thinking CPL


Sun, 09/30/2012 - 20:17 | 2843779 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

I confess to underestimating CentralProcessingLeech. He (and his friends) are truly Evil.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 20:36 | 2843806 CPL
CPL's picture

Yes, you've found the Overlord Reptilian conspirators website, here we wring our hands and plot of nefarious plots to hamstring humanity.


So Jesus walks into hotel and puts three nails on the counter,

The clerk walks over and looks at the nails and looks at Jesus,

Jesus leans over and says "Can you put me up for the night".


Oh Lucifier the Morning Star take me now....or are you not one of those loons?  

I could pour on the juice about how I plot of ways to procure capital by the sinister plot of "work".  It requires labour though, not sure if you are interested that.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 22:05 | 2843941 Cosimo de Medici
Cosimo de Medici's picture

You're a welcome breath of fresh air in the loo at a trucker's rest stop on a Nevada Interstate.

Mon, 10/01/2012 - 03:35 | 2844268 Dr Benway
Dr Benway's picture

May I propose a couple of minor tweaks:


Time the ramping to coincide with some minor piece of positive news, say an annual report with less horrible results than expected, and/or time the shorting to coincide with dividend payouts. Also, it's easier if you, or someone you know, already hold a sizeable proportion of the outstanding shares and daily volume is low.


Wanna see some nice Aussie ramps? Check out NHC, SBR, PMV, MOC. But the entire Aussie market has become a joke. Every afternoon the market flatlines.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 22:06 | 2843942 seek
seek's picture

I don't think I'd necessarily call stealing funds from the mouths of HFT algos evil. Robinhood-esq, perhaps.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:42 | 2843534 Dr Benway
Dr Benway's picture

Very nice tutorial

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 20:28 | 2843795 True.North
True.North's picture

They hired Steve Perkins and got him drunk. He promptly acquired 69% of the company between the hours of 1am and 3am.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:27 | 2843427 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

Braeburn is good, very good.  That is why they need to die, to be sacrificed.  ZH got that right.  

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 19:40 | 2843718 jekyll island
jekyll island's picture

I wonder if they are going to buy gold?   

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 22:57 | 2844033 goldfish1
goldfish1's picture
India unlocks treasure trove of gold as farmers sell

Mon, 10/01/2012 - 00:54 | 2844177 sadmamapatriot
sadmamapatriot's picture

Where the hell isMichael? He has not posted since September18th and he is a multi-post a day guy.

Mon, 10/01/2012 - 01:05 | 2844186 Peter Pan
Peter Pan's picture

When I read the title I thought it was going to be about the Bilderberg Group.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 14:54 | 2843290 Haus-Targaryen
Haus-Targaryen's picture

So APPL has been successful, and abides within the law . . . clearly they aren't paying enough . . . 



Sun, 09/30/2012 - 14:58 | 2843299 Tyler Durden
Tyler Durden's picture

You obviously are not familiar with the "Fairness Doctrine"

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:28 | 2843512 The Shootist
The Shootist's picture

The dude abides man...

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:22 | 2843335 Bay of Pigs
Bay of Pigs's picture

"abides within the law"?

LOL. What fucking law?


Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:33 | 2843351 Buckaroo Banzai
Buckaroo Banzai's picture

The best law that money can buy, that's what fucking law.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:29 | 2843432 sessinpo
sessinpo's picture

In other words, some are jealous they haven't found and manipulated this looghole for themselves.


And it gets worse. I'll give you a heads up because you are so far behind. If you think this subsidariary can manipulate Apple's stock, which I don't disagree with, what is to stop said subsidariary from attacking Apple's competitors and vice versa.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:32 | 2843516 NewThor
NewThor's picture

Regulation = the mirage of Law at the oasis



Wed, 10/03/2012 - 09:14 | 2851437 sessinpo
sessinpo's picture

Yep, which supports my libertarian view.

I would prefer less government involvement as a whole, however, I think most of us agree that government can serve a purpose in curtailing and prosecuting criminal activity. IThe biggest kicker to my desire for smaller less powerful government is that it is government that creates these regulations, these loopholes that everyone is so angry about. Thus government is the problem but instead of blaming them and making government accountable, the majority just let it go and keep bitchin without doing something about it.


Yea, Yes we can

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:36 | 2843443 RiverRoad
RiverRoad's picture

Buckaroo Banzai:   +100

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 14:55 | 2843291 Manthong
Manthong's picture

"its cash balance, which at last check was double that of the US Treasury"

Is this a great country or what?

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:49 | 2843375 Sam Clemons
Sam Clemons's picture

I thought our treasury was quite in the hole and therefore even I have more of a cash balance.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:34 | 2844091 Seer
Seer's picture

Double your NOTHING! :-)  See how easy it is?  In the virtual world we can make up whatever we want; it's kind of like Alice Through The Looking Glass!

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 14:56 | 2843292 Western
Western's picture


Sun, 09/30/2012 - 18:03 | 2843567 NewThor
NewThor's picture


Sun, 09/30/2012 - 14:57 | 2843293 trillionaire
Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:30 | 2843434 Wakanda
Wakanda's picture

I used to pick them in New England orchards.  Braeburns are very tasty.

Mon, 10/01/2012 - 03:41 | 2844273 Dr Benway
Dr Benway's picture

Wiki says they're ideal for tarts.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:55 | 2843550 ForTheWorld
ForTheWorld's picture

It's almost as if they were trying to hide it in plain sight.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 21:31 | 2843893 Tsunami Wave
Tsunami Wave's picture

Ah. Nice. Very nice. Nice name.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:03 | 2843294 Captain Benny
Captain Benny's picture

Hahaha, I work effectively next door to this office.  Its really funny because Reno and Nevada both like playing host to this business.  Also they're very careful to keep the company offices discreet even though they've been featured on newspapers worldwide because of the many tax benefits of being located in Nevada.  I think they do so because they don't want all the crazy Apple fanatics thinking they're a support center genius bar or whatever the heck apple calls their minions.

I honestly have no gripe about the company.  They follow the law, pay their taxes, and do what they're supposed to do.  If anyone has an issue with such, they should realize its the laws that need to change (and be more strictly enforced).

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:10 | 2843313 Captain Benny
Captain Benny's picture

And for all the angry Californians... the reason they aren't located in your state is because your state is totalitarian.  Stop voting in new taxes, silly laws, stricter gun controls, etc and you'll see business return to your state in the following decades.  Here in Nevada (you should learn to pronounce its name:, I guess we value personal (and corporate) freedom a little more than some socialist states.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:17 | 2843324 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

I'm an angry Californian and I'll wax the hell out of your ledges and grind all over 'em.


Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:22 | 2843332 Captain Benny
Captain Benny's picture

Just remember: This isn't Wall Street. Here you don't snort white powder, here you ride it.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:10 | 2843400 tenpanhandle
tenpanhandle's picture

Sorry, angry californian, we have beaten you to that.  Our ledges are all staked and we have been grinding them up for 30 years now.  In fact, we welcome you to come find an open ledge and grind on it.  What we don't welcome is an influx of different minded angry californians  who wish to change the state of Nevada into the utopia next door as their own stinking utopia burns around their ears. 

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:17 | 2843412 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

Ahh, you guys can keep your version of utopia. We have ours up north - Mendo, Humboldt, and Trinity. Don't need nothin else... the cool Pacific, tall redwoods, and the miracle plant... yep.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:30 | 2843435 tenpanhandle
tenpanhandle's picture

Nevada has never been a utopia, nor do we claim it.  It has been a nice place to live though.  However, we have been known to import a little utopia from before mentioned counties, every now and then.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:16 | 2843501 Captain Benny
Captain Benny's picture

I never understood why those parts of California didn't just give their middle finger to the state and become sovereign.

Mon, 10/01/2012 - 10:48 | 2845010 Bringin It
Bringin It's picture

They're trying.


Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:26 | 2843426 LetThemEatRand
LetThemEatRand's picture

I'm not from CA or Nevada, but neither has much to brag about in terms of financial success.  Reading this exchange is like watching a debate between Obama and Romney.   Who won?  Neither.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:35 | 2843441 tenpanhandle
tenpanhandle's picture

well, throw your state into the mix, and start bragging, zippy.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:47 | 2843463 LetThemEatRand
LetThemEatRand's picture

Florida.  Nothing to brag about either.  Unless you like corrupt sociopath governors.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:59 | 2843486 NewThor
NewThor's picture

Texas. We've got the most beautiful women in America.

Warts? sure we got them too. 

Who doesn't?

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:39 | 2843529 SilverFish
SilverFish's picture

None of you have SHIT on us, here in Illinois, where Fearless Leader himself cut his teeth on politics. Corruption is so blatant and out in the open now, nobody even bats an eye. We win in spades.

Mon, 10/01/2012 - 11:27 | 2845182 phalfa5
phalfa5's picture

and we have Chicago ...   home of the greats ...  Capone, Nelson, Moran, Gacy, Evans (Chi fed), The Daleys, the CUBS !!!

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:22 | 2843330 Landrew
Landrew's picture

Apple is a Chinese company receiving protection from the U.S. Government patent office. They are Chinese and should be taxed as such!

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:40 | 2844096 Seer
Seer's picture

"They are Chinese and should be taxed as such!"

WTF does that mean?  Are you saying China should tax them more?  Or, are you saying the US should tax them less?

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 14:57 | 2843297 ThisIsBob
ThisIsBob's picture

Not being constrained by long only strategies, perhaps Braeburn should buy some Appole puts - you know, in case Apple looses its way.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 14:57 | 2843298 mjorden
mjorden's picture


Sun, 09/30/2012 - 14:58 | 2843300 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Wow, great find Tyler!  I would never have even come close to guessing that...

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:03 | 2843303 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

Excellent article - thank you for the insight.

I was driving down the main road in Cupertino a couple of days ago (the cross street DeAnza is where FrAppleChino HQ is) with a friend and we pass by the memorial park where there is a man-made lake with fountains. The water was green as fuck - it looked disgusting. My friend says to me "you woulda thunk Cupertino has a lot of money, with Apple and all, to at least keep the water clean." I LOLd and told him about how the city doesn't see a single penny from these corrupt motherfuckers' hands.

I'm gonna move elsewhere in the Bay... this town has gone down the drain.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:32 | 2843437 LetThemEatRand
LetThemEatRand's picture

The only green that trickles down is the green slimy water.  

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:35 | 2843442 Umh
Umh's picture

They are way to liberal to kill algae.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:01 | 2843489 NewThor
NewThor's picture


In case you ever evolve into a mood to learn.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:57 | 2844122 Captain Benny
Captain Benny's picture

Not personally targetting you, but.....  

"I'm gonna move elsewhere in the Bay... this town has gone down the drain."

And that is why Nevadans hate Californians.   Californians realize that their situation sucks in their utopia of laws.... so they move to Nevada and keep fucking things up with their dumb ass voting and attitudes.   Nevada is no utopia, never claimed to be one.   We at least balance the state budget through whatever it takes.   We make the hard decisions, even if they aren't the ideal ones in my viewpoint.     California can't do squat, its f'd to hell and you turds keep bailing to Nevada.    Please remain in the bay area, us Nevadans like you there.   

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:03 | 2843304 dvolatility
dvolatility's picture

Interesting article.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:04 | 2843305 Galt57
Galt57's picture

Mutualization  !!

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:04 | 2843308 Offthebeach
Offthebeach's picture

Think how much better Amerika would be if that 1% corporation's money was in Washington? The crappy McManshions in Virginia subdivision with his and her GS-14s, or shipped to Egyptian Muslim Brotherhood, Chicago teachers,wind farm, Obama phones, NPR 10 part Stonewall riots documentary,

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:14 | 2843409 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

No...I'm thinking how much better Amerikwa would be if the jobs were here instead of in a Chicom sweatshop.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:43 | 2844104 Seer
Seer's picture

US sweatshops!  USA, USA number 1 (again)!

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:08 | 2843309 resurger
resurger's picture

ha haaaaa!

Now i know where MDB works!

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:10 | 2843311 virgilcaine
virgilcaine's picture

Obama would love to take AAPL 'under his wing' wouldn't he?   All that cash just sitting's just not fair in today's world.   Src.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 16:34 | 2843440 sessinpo
sessinpo's picture

That aint' that much money for government. He'd burn through that in a few days.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:45 | 2844110 Seer
Seer's picture

APPL could then get it all back if they started making iBombs/iDrones...

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:11 | 2843317 RobD
RobD's picture

Holly crap I work about 300 yards east of there, I had no ideal lol.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:17 | 2843323 Captain Benny
Captain Benny's picture

Where do you work?  Immigration?  Bally? IGT?  FBI?  Anyway, I'm sure you're not the lone security guard outside the empty Pfizer warehouse thats been abandoned for years.

(I'm betting FEMA keeps all kinds of crap in that warehouse, btw)

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:21 | 2843331 RobD
RobD's picture

Lol that lady security guard at the Pfizer warehouse is not me  bwahaha

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:36 | 2843357 Captain Benny
Captain Benny's picture

Any idea what the FBI is doing with their "renovations" ?  Seems like they're having some decent amount of construction in their Reno office.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:49 | 2843376 RobD
RobD's picture

Are you talking about the new INS building right by the building above or is there another fed location I don't know about?

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:54 | 2843386 Captain Benny
Captain Benny's picture

The FBI office is between the two Bally buildings and the IGT buildings.  980 Sandhill Road, Reno, NV

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 17:19 | 2843504 RobD
RobD's picture

Hmmm, never noticed it but I don't go that far down Sandhill.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:36 | 2843355 nevadan
nevadan's picture

Howdy neighbors.  I'm within a couple of miles.  Too much!  First the worlds biggest HF and now two ZHers in close proximity.

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 15:42 | 2843362 Captain Benny
Captain Benny's picture

I think when push comes to shove, my rather small doomsday arsenal easily beats the hedging capability of Braeburn...  How can you call yourself hedged when your entire asset base is done through ones and zeros, certificates with the DTCC, or fiat currency of a private bank?  I find it so funny how Apple is so poorly hedged in the real world.

They're entirely dependent on cheap Chinese raw and trace materials, cheap labor, stable government, etc.  They're entirely dependent on fashionistas and dumb ass Americans that think a phone is a status symbol.  They aren't hedged in any way!

Sun, 09/30/2012 - 23:48 | 2844117 Seer
Seer's picture

"They're entirely dependent on cheap Chinese raw and trace materials, cheap labor, stable government, etc.  They're entirely dependent on fashionistas and dumb ass Americans that think a phone is a status symbol. "

And the younger generation is totally dependent on iShit.  Seems we've managed to check-mate ourselves!

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!