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Australian Government 'Finds' Extra $338bn Assets (But No Unicorns Yet)
In what could easily be a Friday Humor post, Reuters reports that the Aussie government's statisticians, taking a page out of the German's 'creative' accounting book, have found an additional $338bn of assets for the nation. 'Cheers' all around as the Australian Bureau of Statistics (and Lies) revised household wealth up by AUD14,380 for every one of the country's 22.6 million people - as new estimates of unlisted shares and other equity pushed the nation's total financial assets to AUD3.1tn (compared to an originally reported AUD2.77tn. As the miners from down-under continue to struggle against a fading China, this miraculous 'find' has dropped the ratio of debt to liquid assets from a worrisome 170.1% to a meager 129.1%. Rumors are circulating that the ABS is now looking for the ark of the covenant, the philosopher's stone, and Shangri-La.
Via Reuters:
Australians are suddenly a whole lot better off after the government statistician "found" A$325 billion ($338 billion) in share assets previously unrecognised.
The Australian Bureau of Statistics on Thursday released its latest report on household assets which included massive upward revisions to estimates for equity holdings. Total financial assets were now put at A$3.1 trillion at the end of March, compared to the originally reported A$2.77 trillion.
The revision is worth roughly A$14,380 for every one of the country's 22.6 million people.
"This issue incorporates new estimates for households holding of unlisted shares and other equity in other private non financial corporations," the statistician drily noted.
The value of such equity is now put at A$383 billion at the end of March, compared to the original A$91 billion.
"The Bureau of Statistics has effectively 'found' A$325 billion in household wealth," said Craig James, chief economist at CommSec.
Total financial assets also rose further in the second quarter to stand at A$3.11 trillion by the end of June, up A$76 billion on the same period last year.
No less than A$702 billion of that was held in bank deposits. Australian banks have been competing fiercely for deposits to reduce their dependence on offshore funding, while households have been keen to save more in the wake of the global financial crisis.
Since the end of 2007 the amount of money stashed in bank deposits has climbed by A$260 billion, or almost 60 percent.
...
The upward revisions to wealth also mean households do not look quite as stretched when compared to their debts.
The ABS now estimates the ratio of debt to liquid assets was 129.1 percent in March, well down on the original estimate of 170.1 percent.
There have been long-standing concerns that the high debt levels of Australian households left them vulnerable to an economic shock such as a sharp rise in the, currently low, 5.1 percent unemployment rate.
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Austrailians need to grow some balls and buy more guns.
Their guns were Corzined back in the '90s.
The aussies are the sheeple of sheeples. You can actually shear them for wool.
Can we do a backbone transplant? Oh snap, we don't seem to have one either.
I'll bet that PM of theirs can't wait to spend it.
Handbags for everyone!
Crocodile handbags!
That ought to put a few more scampi on the barbi.
Aye mate.
Inflating asset values is a prime Aussie occupation, what with financial and property ponzis accounting for half of GDP and wealth. I guess the ABS thinks we just don't have enough dubious assets. Good on them for playing their part in building everimportant CONfidence. In every ponzi endgame, as it becomes clearer the jig is up, there comes a paroxysm of lacking confidence. Now the kleptocrones must keep up confidence long enough so they can cash out.
Check out my slideshow on investment companies' systematic misrepresentation of assets in Australia: http://s1144.photobucket.com/albums/o489/_DrBenway/
Koala handbags!
How about a new round of school halls in country schools that no longer operate?
There is something strangely sexy about her....
You're sick
LMAO AUD , you're so right! I picked this piece up earlier today, world wide factory activity, by country.
Australia ranks #3 after Greece and France!
I'll bet you feel the same way about Lagarde.
If so, I'd say you're attracted to powerful women.
To which the first thought is: Praying Mantis.
yeah it's that bonza Straaalyan aaacceeent
Just listening to her speak should have been enough to keep her off the ballot. There has never been a skirt so empty.
It's really sad since much of the continent is spare of population. It shows the power of the urban and bourg-suburban majority over the outliers.
Ffs, if they had had a legal pillar (i.e., 2nd Amendment), then it wouldn't have happened there.
I {heart} Hazel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t9FqtT-1twA
Ask the members of the US military who've served beside ANZACs in every major conflict that the US have been involved in during the 20th and 21st centuries. Ask them whether or not Aussies step up to the plate, or pussy out. Ask them friend, before you talk shit about which you know nothing...
or did you mean global guns from the MIC? The US bottom line does OK out of our taxpayers for obsolete and 2nd hand crap from the US...
That was NOT the point....
No one doubt's an ANZAC's courage. But the Aussie's still got Corzined by Howard with the semi-auto by-back-bollocks.... I doubt the generation you are alluding to would have bent over and took it so easily.
You left out the part where Australia outlawed semi and automatic weapons as a direct result of the voters after the killing of 35 and wounding of 23 men, women and children by a single gunman with semi and automatic weapons at Port Arthur - do you get it? 58 men, women and children (this gunman even "hunted down" the children). We simply chose not to want a repeat and reacted as a civilised country that holds life dear would. And there's no "alluding" here as to how the previous generation would behave (although they were part of the decision to outlaw too) and I think you're the one with the allusion but then its plain you don't know anything about Australia or Australians. My father was a front line soldier for 3 years in the jungles of the Pacific - and he and the rest of his generation who were lucky to survive never felt that a gun in the home was needed to protect themselves from their neighbours. But we know Americans are different and its none of our business that you need for guns to feel safe from other Americans - just don't try to transfer your national character to us - and if you don't we won't come and save you next time your having your arse kicked by the Japanese at Buna and Gona.
What a stupid thing to say. Translated, you prefer the government and police to take care of you rather than you be an adult and take care of yourself.
That's why neighbourhoods in big cities are called "wards".
You cannot dig your head into the sand and pretend guns don't exist, people will always find ways to acquire and use them. Jesus christ how silly of you to believe that legislating away firearms will solve the problem.. JESUS-FUCKING-CHRIST. and here you are defending it like a child creating a web of lies to protect a previous lie.
you could do with some anger mangement lessons. I hope you don't own a gun.
If humans were truly adult, and were not predisposed to irrational and occasionally animalistic behaviour maybe you would have something.
I'm sure guns exist in Singapore / Japan too.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_firearm-related_death_...
Sorry if I upset you. I assume you live in the US and if I'm correct then I fully agree with you - you should have a gun, it's a dangerous place. I lived in Manhattan (and you may say that Manhattan is not the US but that's a different blog) and I cetainty would have felt safer at times if I'd had a firearm (and I've served in the military by the way), yeap no doubt about it the US is a dangerous place - so many guns in the "wrong hands". But the world is not the US - for example, neighbourhoods in large Australian cities are not called "wards" they're called "electorates" - and in many countries, as hard as it may be to believe it, you don't need a gun to feel safe - because you know for a fact (the same way you know that there are approximately 200 million privately owned firearms in the US) that the odds are pretty good that the person who turned up for the same Batman premier as you doesn't have a Glock or a assault rifle (or orange hair) - and on the opposing side if you're at that premier in the US then the odds are that around 60% of the audience are packing. But that's just stats. So "What about the "whacko risk?" I hear you say? Well to cover that civilised countries have legislation to ensure that whackos, and people like you for that fact, can't get your hands on them. I don't know about you but since I left the military I've lived in 5 different countries (currently in the Middle East) and the US was the only place I felt unsafe. So if you're there, then by all means, strap on your webgear, do your gun safe drill and lock and load and go for a walk - but honestly, if you're in a lot of other countries the closest you'll ever feel that you'll need one is when you're playing a computer game - but then I always ger the feeling that the majority of commentators on this site are the Warlock from Die Hard 4.
You're quite talented in posting tangental garbage.
How does legislation protect you or your family in the presence of a "crazed killer"?
The Australian sheeple displayed cowardice and ingorance when they threw down their guns and went crying and running into the clutches of the tyrannical nanny state to "protect" them from the gun wielding madman.
There are other choices that a civilized country can make when dealing with the aftermath of a madman's rampage. Australia has 3 times the population of Switzerland and Zug is right down the orad from me...
being an aussie felt the same way ... and tbh in a proper society i would still feel the same way ... issue is we live in one FUCKED UP world driven by The American Evil Empire ... :(
CIA overthrew the aussie gov in 1975 ... would not be surprise if they are involved in the port author false flag:
http://www.godlikeproductions.com/forum1/message1575825/pg1
They're trapped in that program "Lost."
Trapped on an island with only two "isms";
Consumerisim, escapism.
Philosophical outlooks; none.
Owning guns is cowardly, so I am not certain how acquiring them indicates bravery.
You're on the wrong forum... try "The Guardian".
I don't believe either Zero Hedge or the Guardian are forums.
I've always admired those who bring a knife to a gunfight... for their bravery, of course.
"guns for show, knives for a pro"
The dictionarty's are on me!
I didn't realize the English translation of Nörgler is Niggler...
So many closet racists hiding behind the gun control banner... This could be fun...
I found $6 million in my underwear drawer last week. Do I have to pay tax on that?
How long was it there? Long term? Short term?
Was this you?
$2M in gold and gems taken from Mining Museumhttp://www.mercedsunstar.com/2012/09/28/2563595/2m-in-gold-and-gems-taken-from.html
Everybody needs a hobby;)
I know where Shangri La is. I found it when I read Lost Horizon.
Found it...it was under the pillow on the couch.
Apparently Australia has jumped on the Benwagon (which may have spent time in the choomwagon) and believes that if you tell people they have money they don't have and can't spend, they will nonetheless spend it and magically "fix" the economy. The blind ideology that drives this kind of thinking is truly mind numbing to behold.
Just occured to me,
334B X 9 by the magic of fractional reserve banking = 3.34 Trillion is instantly created out of thin air.
Australia is about to be destroyed in a swamp of liquidity.
Important distinction:
The Aus government has spent on stimulous, but it has not increased money supply in order to do so. And the government has made reasonable inroads to paying back the govt stimulous debt.
The population, on the other hand, remain drowning in private debt
You talk as if governments are a separate entity to the taxpayer. Where did they get the money to spend in the first place and then where did they get the money to (as suggested, without qualification) pay off that stimulous, the Government ACME Enterprises? Oh yeah, down behind the lounge cushions. The ABS just found it.
apparently the home price to salary ratio is one of the highest in the world. IT salaries at least have not moved in 6 years but our place is up almost 50%.
Just because some statistician thinks I have more money in the bank doesn't mean I have more money in the bank. This is the dumbest thing I heard since the US govt said that unemployment was at 8.x%.
This is the final push of spruikers trying to jimmy the market.
Real estate agents believe if they convince people house prices are rising, they will actually rise. Stockbrokers believe the way to increase confidence in equities is to engineer a market ramp clearly demonstrating how broken the market is. Politicians believe that fundamentals are secondary to jimmying interest rates.
They seriously do not understand the difference between fundamentals and proxies. It's like a doctor trying to cure the patient by forging his test results. Ridiculous, and reality always prevails in the end anyway.
Doc .... so right. Funny, on the telly downunder the latest bollocks to get the sheeple to spend is to offer 15 months without any payments, then a further 18 months interest free. Later on another ad appears from some .gov agency telling folks not to go into dumb debt.... unless it's for education then that's an investment LOL!
It's all so Fuc*ed up :(
Yeah Rogue the doubletalk is just too funny. Like the RBA trying to pretend it didnt have a hand in inflating the bubble. Or the fact that Sydney Morning Heralds business and property section have become straight advertorials. They have ANZ openly sponsoring the property section. LOL.
As long as they continue their "zero down Kangaroo loans" they'll be fine....just fine....
Buying stuff with money you don't have. It's all the rage now.....It's the New Paradigm.
You just can't make this shit up!
Oh, wait....You can.
It's called digital shit. Same full body and texture, just less aromatic.
Was the ABS scuba diving in a popular canoeing site?
Hey, I boated there just last week!!
Whew. I feel much knowing we are in such capable hands.
I found a blonde in my closet but I am not gonna advertise it
Well if she's just now coming out of the closet you didn't have a chance anyways...
Soon to be erased by their impending real estate crash.
No worries, mate!
Sorry Tyler...they just nationalized their Gold Mines and therefore "found" $338 Billion in real currency.
"This issue incorporates new estimates for households holding of unlisted shares and other equity in other private non financial corporations"
Frightening guesswork.
Governments are starting to panic, looking more nasty by the minute.
Get your assets off the grid. Australia is most probably broke.
Not broke yet...Australian Bureau of Statistics says they drilled into Ayers Rock and the massive core is solid gold.
Better yet... pure tungsten!
I no make that wealth.... Sumcunt else did!
Bloody Chinese...it all flied lies
I have seen some of the people who accused me of being the sky is falling guy starting to panic lately. I have to believe it ain't going to be long now.
To be truthful they have been able to prop this up much longer than I thought possible, but I agree it can't be too much longer before the chaos starts again. I hope you're prepared to get your family out of Manhattan when it does.
you know what Doc...I know a lot of people. A lot of them are starting to get their shit together. My hope is we have enough time for them to be prepared if this thing breaks and we can hold together. My mother in law is looking for a place in Park City Utah (big skier). I told her to get a bigger place than she was looking for and I would throw in. I guess that's where I am heading if it gets that bad. I mean thats where I would send my family. I would rather hang here with the crazy assholes than live with my mother in law.
Too funny, I'm pretty lucky I enjoy my MIL. She is a pretty good person and easy to get along with. Now my sister-in- law is another story, she's a real wack job. I'd rather drag my balls across three miles of broken glass then spend time with her.
Yeah I have to be honest, my mother in law is a good egg. But god knows if we all ended up in some 2 bedroom condo...
I am (somewhat) in the burbs out here (about 45 mins outside of the city) so I am probably going to hang in here. But if I think it is going the wrong way my ass is outta here.
It will be actually interesting. Because the panic will hit everywhere at the same time, or roughly the same time. You can feel it building. When you have so called solvent countries make up lies (above post) daily, or they are trying find extra $ with assumptions of public wealth. Either way a precursor for major goverment confiscation.
Last days of empires...
It's funny chump, the expression about the markets staying irrational....the same thing applies. The question is, is this generations of financial repression ahead? If so I will probably hold up better financially than some pf my peers because I prepared, but I will absolutely lose my mind at some point watching them hold it together. Or do we wake up one day and all hell broke loose. What an awful set of choices.
I think it's the one day we wake up and all hell will break loose scenario.
It's asset destruction that causes most people to lose it, if you are prepared there as much as you can be, should be ok.
Thanks chump. It's interesting, the one bad thing about being the sky is falling guy is that when the sky falls and people have not prepared they put a bullseye on your ass. I have started shutting my trap and shrugging my shoulders a lot more lately. Part of me thinks it's better to act as surprised as everyone else.
The ABS now estimates the ratio of debt to liquid assets was 129.1 percent in March, well down on the original estimate of 170.1 percent.
So the ABS is just updating their fucking lies.
And as this market gets worse, the quality and integrity of any data will be suspect when it comes from any government.
That is not a market, that is a propoganda tool.
That's right. They try to increase confidence, not by doing their job correctly so that confidence grows organically, but by trying to juice the confidence directly. So instead of effective regulation we have regulators sweeping problems under the carpet, so as not to threaten confidence. Instead of astute media coverage we have cheerleading. Instead of focusing on operations, companies try to game their share price.
Revised estimates of estimated estimates. Is any of this shit real?
Just shut up and hit the spend more button as hard as you can.
Aborigines - living in Australia for over 40,000 years - chuckle at the hubris of the white man and his fancy printing press.
When they're not drunk and trashing the tax payer funded houses they live in, sure. Actually, come to think of it, they couldn't even spell the word "press".
Come to think of it, you wouldn't last but a few days in their world.
Define "their world" and I'll educate you on the matter.
Tanamai desert, pre-European settlement. Educate away.
It is just so hard to know where to start when you see such ignorance and hatefulness rolled into a single statement. Try picking up at least one history book and doing a little reading before you make such a hateful and stupid statements.
It is only because of people like you throughout our country's history that what you have said is true to the extent that it is. Although I doubt you are capable of understanding what I am saying.
Rainbow coloured kangaroos flying out of the unicorn's ass...
This is the best news I've heard all year. Plasma Tee Vee here I come!!
Meanwhile, in the land of unicorns and rainbows, another government statistic isn't adding up.
http://mobile.news.com.au/business/worklife/brace-for-a-white-collar-rec...
i bet next week they tell all the men that their dicks grew 5inches longer.....
Damn, I'll need three hands to hold it.
I bet our Prime Minister would really appreciate that news. Maybe that's why she never married, there just wasn't ever enough meat in the old aussie sausage roll.
But of course!
If we take a second look at our feces, we will see that it is full of phosphorous and as such is an Organic very valuable fertilizer. With so much shit coming out the fat sugar eating people in the industrialized nations, the entire wealth can be increased with several trillion dollars.
And just in a case that someone does not take this seriously, although our human "guano" is not as good as bat's one (http://www.archipelagobatguano.com/6.shtml), either due to the GMOs or otherwise, we still can say that is has a great value, can't we.
A supplier who used to work at Pacific Brands (bonds brand etc.) mentioned that they never sourced products from China anymore because it’s too expensive, they go to Bangladesh, India etc.
Australia is one of the only countries that haven’t printed HUGE amounts of money (they have printed large amounts though compared to historical standards), hence the high AUD.
There are two major issues that I see.
Australia needs to print & or reduce interest rates today because:
1. Tourism is almost non existent (look at Gold Coast, Sydney etc.) – If they print the AUD will drop and potentially tourists will return.
2. Manufacturing has grinded to a halt – If they print it will reduce the AUD and making us more competitive, thus allowing for more manufacturing jobs.
3. House prices continue to fall, thus making consumers spend less – if they print then house prices will be perceived to go up as inflation will kick in, making consumers feel richer and spend money.
Australia can’t print & or reduce the interest rates because:
1. Most investors in Australia are from overseas, putting their money in Australia to diversify, and they get a ‘good’ return (better than 0% interest in most countries, shit compared to historical standards though).
2. If investors pull out because we drop the interest rates and they can get better returns elsewhere, then it will make it very difficult to find lenders. Cash will dry up.
3. We import everything these days, and if the dollar drops, then food, clothes, petrol, everything will cost us more….
It’s a catch 22.
If they want to drop the rates and make an impact to home owners, then they have to do it today for publicity otherwise it will get masked on Melbourne Cup day.
Not sure if they will or not, they are stuck.
The safest play either way is to Long Gold + Short AUD (very low risk).
The race to zero.
they can't cut.
australia could be slammed with food/energy year end. they will only cut when global markets begin their meltdown, maybe oct or nov.
they cut.
Australia is about to get pressure cooked with stagflation, throw Canada into that situation too.
Hell, throw the whole world into that cooker too.
A substantial majority of "e-con-omists" predicted they'd leave it unchanged. They didn't see that coming either.
Australia should print because of A.
Australia should not print because of B.
CTRL+Print will fix everything. \sarc ON
now that demand for commodities is dropping you have to drop the aussie to help prop it up. Stevens has only just started saying that the high aussie is hurting us - and its been high for about 5 years.
` A$325 billion ($338 billion) in share assets previously unrecognised.` (This issue incorporates new estimates for households holding of unlisted shares and other equity in other private non financial corporations," the statistician drily noted)
Unlisted shares...
Mark to Mark...what?
They feel richer already.
They didn't build that... ;-)
Anybody here live/know about living in Australia? Inevitably, I'll have to leave the US to escape the creeping hand of the welfare state, and Australia seems pretty cool. Is New Zealand better?
NZ is off the beaten path which is good.
NZ has been turning more socialist for years which is bad
NZ has it's own abundent supply of water, great farm land and renewable electricity which good
NZ has a prime minister that is America's bitch which is bad
NZ has relaxed people, and is a great place to bring up kids which is good
NZ has a massive property bubble which is bad
so in summary it's much like Frozen Yoghurt
As a ex-NZ living in the UK the list above pretty much sums it up.
Move to OZ - there are more jobs and less parasites...
Hey Bro, sure those fella's across the Tassey just have to go walk-a-bout when they are a bit skint and find some stuff to dig up and flog. But we still got Pinapple Lumps... Choice!
I live in aust. our $ maybe %3 higher than yours, but everyything costs 2x s much. go searxh a realestarte site ill get you one i nice cheap slum area...
http://www.realestate.com.au/buy/property-house-with-4-bedrooms-in-+sa+5...
ok 4 bedroom maybe a bit extravagnt , try 3 or flats.
or wanna look at cars?
http://www.carsguide.com.au/buy-a-car/?origin=browse&searchTypes=417#exp...
i live here ,and am thinking moving to america might be a good option. damn. ok spain maybe.
1. One of the best places on earth to live
2. High cost of living
3. Mind-blowingly expensive housing - plateaued now, but still crazy high
All kiwis come here to live, so do the math on that one...
"Australio-pithy-cunts"
They finally have enough money to genentically engineer giant koalas. I am excited.
Der Wille Zur Macht... AUS is a welfare state too, and the cost of living here is high... for example a pack of 20 cigarettes is $18.
Classic considering the housing market in OZ is tanking as is the New Zealand one.....good to see the denial still in full swing down under...
Look at this great piece of research: The Great Australian Investment Ponzi.
Investment comanies investing in each other and creating a premium to issue new shares to pay the promised dividend.
The Regulator is doing nothing.
http://s1144.photobucket.com/albums/o489/_DrBenway/?action=view¤t=Executivesummary.png
Not sure how accurate this is, but apparantly Australians have the highest wealth and fifth highest GDP per capita in the world.
Australians have the highest wealth and fifth highest GDP per capita in the world
Also ranked second in the world (behind Norway) in the UN Human Development Index.
Cos we have stupidly overpriced housing. 5th highest GDP - we have jobs, for now. Can't think of any other English speaking country I would rather live and this one's getting a little rank.
wheres my $14k? ill go buy some gold n silver, fucken lies LIES i tell you
What %age of those deposits are indirectly held by foreign interests, since over half the ASX is foreign investment. Reuters puff piece.
This makes me feel even better about my AUD/USD short. Seems to me TPTB in Aus are pretty worried.