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Let The Presidential Debate Drinking Games Begin

Tyler Durden's picture


Far be it from us to encourage excess consumption; but, should you feel the need to numb yourself a little during the ensuing battle-royale between Obama and Romney, we present - for your imbibing pleasure - the official drinking game of the 2012 election debates.


and as an added stimulus bonus, here is the 'Lite' version (h/t @ThemisSal)


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Wed, 10/03/2012 - 19:55 | 2853979 swissaustrian
swissaustrian's picture

If someone says "constitutional government" drink the whole bottle.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 19:59 | 2853989 Captain Benny
Captain Benny's picture

If someone says Ron Paul or gold standard, drink Goldschläger.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 19:59 | 2853996 swissaustrian
swissaustrian's picture


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:23 | 2854074 THX 1178
THX 1178's picture

If someone mentions the Federal Reserve... HAHALOL

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:54 | 2854177 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

Drink when they start telling the anecdotes about the regular old Americans that they just met so they themesleves seem like regular old Americans.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:04 | 2854206 fuu
fuu's picture

That's 27 blinks in the intro. 27 x 2 = drink up bitzhez!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:21 | 2854245 Muppet of the U...
Muppet of the Universe's picture

I seasoned, fried in organic olive oil, and ate: 1 lb of organic beef, half a loaf of challah, half a loaf of french batard, 2 organic bell peppers, 2 organic squash, 2 organic potatoes, 2 cups of organic yogurt, 1 glass of organic muscle milk, and 1 glass of a potassium-magnesium sterate mix...


& your stupid fucking drinking game still got me drunk.  you mother fuckers!  Although in all fairness I did start the drinking game at 3 pm after shorting Nat Gas all day... & I starting drinking whenever I thought about gold, and I keep gold coins in my bed and sleep with them... so its kinda hard not to.  Also I started drinking more with your fuckin drinking game, and whenever anyone said or wrote any of the afore mentions drinking words.  A perfectly good meal will go to waste b/c of you zerohedge, you mother fuckers.  A perfectly good bathroom time of solid duke will go to splatter b/c of your overzealous games!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:22 | 2854268 malikai
malikai's picture

If anyone actually plays this game, they're in the hospital by the end of the "debate".

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:34 | 2854274 Muppet of the U...
Muppet of the Universe's picture



& look at gary johnson broadcasting live from a dirty motel room watching the debates and responding to himself... its so fuckin sad.  Watching it just makes me wanna buy repo companies, land, silver and gold. 





Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:36 | 2854313 redpill
redpill's picture

This wasn't remotely fair, I'm already shitcanned.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:58 | 2854320 Muppet of the U...
Muppet of the Universe's picture




& if someone says bank/banks drink 1 shot.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 23:56 | 2854734 Muppet of the U...
Muppet of the Universe's picture


^ gary johnson, go get em champ ;D

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:08 | 2854010 Captain Benny
Captain Benny's picture

If someone says Ben Bernanke, order the bar rag to be squeezed into a glass.  Then drink.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:12 | 2854045 Ms. Erable
Ms. Erable's picture

If someone says Ben Bernanke, all drinkers must stand and shout, "JUMP, YOU FUCKER!!!". Last person to do so finishes all drinks in the room.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:48 | 2854154 j-dub
j-dub's picture

How bout all drinkers stand up and shout,"GET TO WORK, MR. CHAIRMAN!"  Last person to do so finishes all drinks in the room.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:48 | 2854155 j-dub
j-dub's picture

How bout all drinkers stand up and shout,"GET TO WORK, MR. CHAIRMAN!"  Last person to do so finishes all drinks in the room.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:16 | 2854060 Tyler Durden
Tyler Durden's picture

It's Tungstenschläger now

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:21 | 2854071 nmewn
nmewn's picture


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:30 | 2854096 lineskis
lineskis's picture

No more need of tungsten, just print gold:


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:49 | 2854156 pods
pods's picture

Probably legit, but the bacteria is starting off with gold chloride, so it really is not creating gold.

The best idea is mining the ocean for gold. Get gold and get to fish at the same time!


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:41 | 2854329 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

why mine it?  just put the whole ocean as the new treasury address and start leasing it.. no audit so no need to know whats there

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:56 | 2854391 Muppet of the U...
Muppet of the Universe's picture


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 22:34 | 2854541 bilbert
bilbert's picture

"All your International Waters are belong to us!"

Fixed it for ya............

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 23:53 | 2854736 e_goldstein
e_goldstein's picture

"The best idea is mining the ocean for gold."

Absolutely. Especially with all of those recent boating accidents.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 22:04 | 2854196 LeisureSmith
LeisureSmith's picture

A more profitable and pertinent use of microorganisms would be to make boose.

Holy Shit this is painful to watch...why can't i stop watching.... whyyyyy!! Endless torrent of bullshit from this dishonest duo, Fuck The Dept Brother and Mitt for Brains. Fuck'em.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:32 | 2854104 Thomas
Thomas's picture

"monetary bukkake"

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 22:41 | 2854544 natty light
natty light's picture



Wed, 10/03/2012 - 23:10 | 2854650 TheFineKid
TheFineKid's picture

If one says to the other " what are you hopped up on fucking goofballs" quit drinking cause shit just got real.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:07 | 2854028 monogratis
monogratis's picture

Margarita mix on the foodstamp card BITCHEZ!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:10 | 2854038 LongSoupLine
LongSoupLine's picture

If someone says, "blythe" or "dimon", drink a whole case of Coors "silver bullets".

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:47 | 2854355 Dealer
Dealer's picture


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:19 | 2854256 Robslob
Robslob's picture

Is it just me or is a lot of zerohedge posts coming from CNBC or is it the other way around?

Seems like just yesterday when the lag time from Zerohedge to MSM was 4-6 more like 4-6 hours....

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:25 | 2854280 MacGruber
MacGruber's picture

Got a way better drinking game... Drink everytime these two douches say they agree with each other. Already drank half a 5th. New boss same as the old boss....

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:51 | 2854369 steelhead23
steelhead23's picture

Hell, if one of these two offers us a true constitutional government, I'm gonna roll a fatee and pass it around.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 22:20 | 2854479 Harbanger
Harbanger's picture

Bottoms up, Romney just talked about the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 19:56 | 2853980 Surrealist
Surrealist's picture

That's suicide!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:01 | 2854000 CH1
CH1's picture

Definitely suicidal.

But if someone mentions grannies eating cat food, even I'll have to take a drink.

Full disclosure: I will definitely NOT be watching (I've punished myself enough over the last several decades), but if I hear that the words were spoken, I'll have to chug something.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:22 | 2854073 Taint Boil
Taint Boil's picture



Dude, I already got a pint down – you’re going to kill me.

ZeroHedge is the best – buuuuurp.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 19:56 | 2853982 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Hammered Time.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:10 | 2854039 tom a taxpayer
Wed, 10/03/2012 - 19:58 | 2853988 Cdad
Cdad's picture

You'll kill us all, Tyler!  Might be pretty quiet around here tomorrow.

Far be it from me to be a killjoy.  I'm shining up my tini shaker even now.  God help us all as we listen to tonight's infomercial.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 19:59 | 2853990 Insideher Trading
Insideher Trading's picture

Alcohol poisoning ensues.

I've already called in sick to work.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:41 | 2854130 Harbanger
Harbanger's picture

HR-3590. Page 272. section 1145: Hospitals will ration spleens according to the patient's age and history of alcohol abuse.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 19:58 | 2853991 IMA5U
IMA5U's picture

How about "fair share"


10 drinx and funnel a 40oz

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:30 | 2854094 you enjoy myself
you enjoy myself's picture

you beat me to it.  everyone would go blind if that was on the list.

also, i object to "arguing with the moderator" as a flag - jim lehrer is not exactly a fair broker that will studiously avoid "when did you stop beating your wife" questions.  obama wouldn't accept the premise of every question if it was coming from rush limbaugh.


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 19:59 | 2853994 brewing
brewing's picture

i'm watching ghost hunters and seinfeld re-runs, because i'm voting gary johnson and refuse to listen to the liars that are in the debate...

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:05 | 2854014 monogratis
monogratis's picture

cheers mate.. The whole thing is so sickening its' not even worth watching it for entertainment purposes.  We all know the debate will only radicalize the two sides even more which means I'll have to listen to morons tell me how I should vote for one of these clowns.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:41 | 2854135 putaipan
putaipan's picture

i'm gonna watch it on they'r gonna splice in rocky anderson and the green"we need trains,we need trains"lady-

i'm gonna have a puff everytime rocky says fraud or prosicutions.....

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:06 | 2854020 CH1
CH1's picture

I don't vote at all, but I understand completely. Seinfeld I can appreciate, taking full-time liars seriously, I cannot.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:12 | 2854048 brewing
brewing's picture

George Costanza to Jerry, "remember jerry, it's not a lie if you believe it"...

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:01 | 2853999 swissaustrian
swissaustrian's picture

you didn't drink that!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:07 | 2854023 EvlTheCat
EvlTheCat's picture

In about 10 minutes I will take a picture of the toilet bowl to prove you and the TOTUS wrong...  If you want it mid stream we're going to have a problem...

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:07 | 2854026 spankthebernank
spankthebernank's picture

You're on a roll swissy


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:01 | 2854002 The Shootist
The Shootist's picture

If someone says Ben Bernanke, chug moonshine.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:02 | 2854007 EvlTheCat
EvlTheCat's picture

I am already drunk.  I will just consider this the lightning round...

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:02 | 2854008 monogratis
monogratis's picture

If only I could get a drink down in between the vomiting...

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:05 | 2854012 chump666
chump666's picture

I don't give f*ck about these two, I'd drink them under the table anyways.  Not going to waste premium spirits on those a-holes.

But got this running loop.  Genius

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:04 | 2854013 FiatFapper
FiatFapper's picture

How are the teleprompters setup at these gigs? Can they crib each others written verbiage?

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:05 | 2854017 gimli
gimli's picture

Unfortunately, after this mess is over we all have to pay the tab.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:06 | 2854021 Overfed
Overfed's picture

Why can't they have this on a Friday? :-(

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:13 | 2854050 Long-John-Silver
Long-John-Silver's picture

Serious stuff happens on Friday.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:06 | 2854022 Whiner
Whiner's picture

Anheiser-Bush, the Cheif $$$$ sponsor of Presidential Debate Commission, approves this article. Please do not over drink ( more that 2cases of Bud) while watching. What a farce!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:07 | 2854024 Trimmed Hedge
Trimmed Hedge's picture

Can't we just toke up instead..?

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:20 | 2854070 JohnG
JohnG's picture

That would cost your entire stash.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:07 | 2854027 Row Well Number 41
Row Well Number 41's picture

How much do you have to drink before hand to be able to listen to this status quo infomercial?


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:33 | 2854108 V in PA
V in PA's picture

LMAO! Logged in just to give you the +1

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:07 | 2854030 no life
no life's picture

"Lady parts.."  Chug

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:08 | 2854031 catch edge ghost
catch edge ghost's picture

Unless they are both armed, chained together, and locked in a cage with a feral wolf... not watching.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:10 | 2854035 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

I'll be three sheets to the wind in the first five minutes.

May as well be drunk to bear the burden of this meaningless shit-storm and nonsensical equivocation.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:11 | 2854040 fuu
fuu's picture

It's a trap!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:09 | 2854224 1100-TACTICAL-12
1100-TACTICAL-12's picture

Already drunk......

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:11 | 2854047 Long-John-Silver
Long-John-Silver's picture

I can't watch this shit. I can't afford my anti depression drugs now and all this is going to do is make me even more depressed.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:20 | 2854065 nmewn
nmewn's picture

See, its working ;-)

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:13 | 2854049 e-man
e-man's picture

All this drinking will be good practice for after the elections.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:21 | 2854068 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:33 | 2854107 akak
akak's picture

All those geeky, geeky hats .... LOL!

Thu, 10/04/2012 - 00:24 | 2854798 Cosimo de Medici
Cosimo de Medici's picture

Every last one of them is infinitely superior to the forward or backward baseball cap. Add to that "The Edge" pullover and the hood of the hoodie....all butt ugly and without character or style. And the last person who knew the proper use of a cowboy hat was Slim Pickens.

Borsalino, your day will come again.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:35 | 2854111 yabyum
yabyum's picture

Great Americans  with those signs WB7. True heros, we need more of them now!!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:46 | 2854147 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

Four more beers!  Four more beers!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:56 | 2854180 BidnessMan
BidnessMan's picture

This is one dressed up mob. Must really like beer!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:24 | 2854078 Curt W
Curt W's picture

Fiscal cliff = line of coke

QE3 = shoot heroin

I promise = acid


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:26 | 2854084 booboo
booboo's picture

and if the moderator says "nice ass Mr President" shotgun enema with a pony keg.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:26 | 2854085 East Coast Diablo
East Coast Diablo's picture

Alcohol Enemas all around!

They're on the house!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:28 | 2854090 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

This could be an ugly night. I better go out and get some more beer.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:29 | 2854092 PiratePiggy
PiratePiggy's picture

If someone reminds us that President Bush had taken his eye off Afghanistan, get on the floor, lie on your back, have your buddy pour the beer up your nose until the President closes Guantanamo

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:36 | 2854113 Jendrzejczyk
Jendrzejczyk's picture

Janet Brown = Scary

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:38 | 2854119 Fix It Again Timmy
Fix It Again Timmy's picture

Laurel and Hardy watch the Presidental Debate......


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:39 | 2854120 Jim in MN
Jim in MN's picture

I dimly recall the rules we had for the first 1992 debate:

Whenever Clinton says 'Future'

Whenever Bush says 'Character'

Whenever Perot says 'American People'

I literally could not find my way home after that.  Stumbled around until dawn.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:39 | 2854124 Jendrzejczyk
Jendrzejczyk's picture

Frank "Combover" Fahrenkopf

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:40 | 2854127 tom a taxpayer
tom a taxpayer's picture

"Fast and Furious" = lightning chug-a-lug round.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:44 | 2854138 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

If somebody says Obamaphone drink a bottle of Mad Dog.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:44 | 2854140 Jendrzejczyk
Jendrzejczyk's picture

Mike "Three Hairs" McCurry

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:44 | 2854141 j-dub
j-dub's picture

I'm drinking when either candidate mentions any percentage or fraction.

This should be fun!!!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:46 | 2854144 PiratePiggy
PiratePiggy's picture

If someone, including a commentator, says "Gov. Gary Johnson", pretend you didn't hear it and talk about the sponsors.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:49 | 2854157 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

I think they are just going to hug it out and sit down for coffee instead of debate. 

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:50 | 2854163 Cabreado
Cabreado's picture

While I will drink,

it will mostly be to numb the pain that is this particular sideshow

snowing 98.252% of the world that has no clue

that "the presidency" is by design without much power

and Congress gets a pass


all the way to our Hell.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:53 | 2854176 girlsunshine
girlsunshine's picture

If anyone, and I mean anyone says any of the following, I will skip the drinking and go straight to pass out (from shock):

shadow banking, $680 Trillion in derivatives, high frequency trading, jp morgan, jp morgan and silver bullion CONFISCATION, robert rubin, JON CORZINE, REHYPOTHECATION, underground barter...or anything that is reality of our FAKE ECONOMY.    

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:57 | 2854184 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

LOL Corzine!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:02 | 2854202 Jendrzejczyk
Jendrzejczyk's picture

If anyone says Choom Wagon, massive tokes all around.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:57 | 2854187 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

I think it would be great if they both wore armbands with the star of david on them...just as a reminder...

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 20:59 | 2854189 Jendrzejczyk
Jendrzejczyk's picture

Jim "One Spock Ear" Lehrer moderating tonight.  

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:03 | 2854199 Number 156
Number 156's picture

How many of you gave up on politics and started drinking before the debates even started, say 'Aye'.

Its the only way youre going to get through the debates.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:02 | 2854200 djsmps
djsmps's picture

Five shots for everytime Obama says "folks".

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:06 | 2854212 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Fuck fuck fuck fuck. I just realized Obummer is drinking my favorite beer .. Guinness. What's a pussy like that doing drinking a man's beer?

Thu, 10/04/2012 - 01:49 | 2854934 Angus McHugepenis
Angus McHugepenis's picture

... pretending to be a man... trying to get the "Guiness vote"... whatever. You're gonna hate having to switch brands after all these years my good Dr.

Thu, 10/04/2012 - 03:02 | 2854995 Intoxicologist
Intoxicologist's picture

No worries, Doc.  Pretty sure he didn't swallow.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:07 | 2854216 robertocarlos
robertocarlos's picture

Drink. Romney has gone full regular folks.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:10 | 2854223 robertocarlos
robertocarlos's picture

Improve the education system. Drink.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:10 | 2854225 j-dub
j-dub's picture

If anyone out there knows someone that is scheduled to drink when the term"middle class" is uttered, get a G-D damn ambulance to his/her house right now!!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:20 | 2854228 j-dub
j-dub's picture

25%-kick off drink, bitches!!!!!!!!!


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:15 | 2854239 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

Taxes?  we takin bout Taxes??

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:19 | 2854255 Sathington Willougby
Sathington Willougby's picture

If someone says "as a boy I dreamed of being a baseball"

knee yourself in the bridge of your nose.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:20 | 2854261 thebuddhastalin
thebuddhastalin's picture

I'm already half drunk should I switch to lite?

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:34 | 2854306 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:20 | 2854262 dapper_dan
dapper_dan's picture

Damn, if "anytime someone says middle class" was on the list, I'd be drunk by now...

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:27 | 2854275 alien-IQ
alien-IQ's picture

Fuck it. I can't watch any more of this bullshit. I tried...but I just can't take it any more.

Gonna watch The Big Lebowski instead because I know for a fact that movie will contain more truth and common sense than this idiotic fucking debate of lies.

Is it really a debate if both are lying non stop? Isn't that more of a psyop than a debate?

anyways....nothing is fucked dude...

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:39 | 2854323 Cosimo de Medici
Cosimo de Medici's picture

Line for Romney:

He beefs about what he inherited;  look what I'm going to inherit!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:42 | 2854333 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:42 | 2854340 californiagirl
californiagirl's picture

I am counting the number of times each candidate says "uh". Obama is winning by a mile. I would be dead of alcohol poisoning if I took a sip each time.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 22:38 | 2854558 californiagirl
californiagirl's picture

Total "Uh"s. Results, excluding breaks:

Obama: 93
Romney: None

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:43 | 2854341 Lord Drek
Lord Drek's picture

Incredible. Their neckties have got to be some kind of joke.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:44 | 2854348 Endgamer
Endgamer's picture

I'm bloody pisssed.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:45 | 2854352 beachdude
beachdude's picture

Absolut(ly) alien-iq.... Truth and Common Sense.

The Dude: Nobody calls me Lebowski.
You got the wrong guy.
I'm the Dude, man.
Blond Treehorn Thug: Your name's Lebowski, Lebowski. Your wife is Bunny.
The Dude: My … my wi– my wife, Bunny?
Do you see a wedding ring on my finger?
Does this place look like I'm fucking married?
The toilet seat's up, man!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:52 | 2854371 LayPersonWatchin
LayPersonWatchin's picture

OK ywou gutys (gakls)!!!!!!  I trioed tooo keepo up witjh all the rullles!?!?!?!?!  I'm F.U.B.A.R. gucked up

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:56 | 2854386 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

wish someone would tweet corzine, prince, mozillo, fuld, DGW blankfien, FED audit backdoor $16T

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 21:56 | 2854389 mayavision2012
mayavision2012's picture

If one of them says they'll end the Federal Reserve, make mine champagne.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 22:19 | 2854476 Billy Shears
Billy Shears's picture

Pretty wasted!


Wed, 10/03/2012 - 22:26 | 2854500 Endgamer
Endgamer's picture

He bucking flinked!!!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 22:29 | 2854517 Harbanger
Harbanger's picture

Romney Wins the 1st round.

Thu, 10/04/2012 - 10:51 | 2854525 Democratic koolaid
Democratic koolaid's picture

Whats that on Obamas face? ow it's his face!

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 22:35 | 2854547 Harbanger
Harbanger's picture

Everybody's getting a fair share and a free phone.

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 23:35 | 2854697 beachdude
beachdude's picture

Silver, platinum, oil starting to recover.

Thu, 10/04/2012 - 00:51 | 2854860 AmenRa
AmenRa's picture

dapper dan


If the game was based on hearing the phrase "middle cless" many people would have alcohol poisoning by now.

Thu, 10/04/2012 - 01:39 | 2854919 Angus McHugepenis
Angus McHugepenis's picture

Fuck... a Unicorn just walked right by me.

Thu, 10/04/2012 - 06:05 | 2855086 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

Mittens just proved why you should buy American made Products, not the cheap shit made by Chicoms.

Barry sucked so much I bet they can't wait for him to return to Man's Country in Chitown. I'll bet Larry Sinclaire's already got some ripple on ice and a bag o' crack ready.

"Honey, did we just hit something?"

"I don't think so, Mitt. Just a bump in the road-- oh, look, only 100 miles to DC!"

Thu, 10/04/2012 - 08:01 | 2855245 Aegelis
Aegelis's picture

Why does my drink taste like tears?

Thu, 10/04/2012 - 15:48 | 2857012 BlackholeDivestment
BlackholeDivestment's picture

...I woke up laughing ..still, and reading this blog almost broke my ribs. LMAO. I love you guys. lol.

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