As World Awaits Venezuela Presidential Results, Tanks Enter Caracas

Tyler Durden's picture

Update: HUGO CHAVEZ WINS VENEZUELA RE-ELECTION, ELECTORAL COUNCIL SAYS. Contrary to exit polls as noted earlier, Chavez won 54.4% of the vote, with 90% of the votes counted, and a 80.4% turnout, according to the Electoral Council. At least the local APCs are fully stocked on Whoppers for the next few days.

While the world awaits with bated breath to find out if Hugo Chavez has lost the first "presidential" election in 14 years (an outcome with major implications for the crude market), which according to the latest exit polls he was trailing 48.1% to 51.3% to challenger Henrique Capriles, Diebold post-processing and hanging chad pro forma-ing notwithstanding, the question is what happens if there is a peaceful overthrow at the helm of the Latin American commodities powerhouse. And we use the term "peaceful" loosely: because the twitter stream is currently abuzz with a picture of tanks in Venezuela's capital as seen below. Hopefully they are merely waiting in line at the drive thru for the latest BK value meal and nothing more.

And since everyone knows what Hugo Chavez (who recently took possession of the country's LBMA gold stash, perhaps rather prudently) looks like, here is what Venezuela's next leader may very well look like if Caracas has not figured out how to operate the Diebold machines yet.

More from Reuters.

Venezuela's presidential election looked headed for a close finish on Sunday with Hugo Chavez facing an unprecedented challenge to his socialist rule from a young rival tapping into discontent over crime and cronyism.


An energetic campaign by centrist state governor Henrique Capriles, 40, has united the opposition and turned him into its best chance in 14 years to unseat the popular president and take the reins of South America's leading oil exporter.


Chavez has used record oil revenue to support ideological allies around the world while preaching a fiercely anti-Washington line, so the election is being watched eagerly from the United States to Belarus and Iran.


Polling stations closed at 6 p.m. local time (2230 GMT), except for those that still had voters waiting in line.


Sources on both sides predicted a narrow victory based on their own monitoring. Several unofficial exit polls gave divergent results, but all showed a tight finish.


"I urge the country to be calm and patient," Chavez said in a phone call to his campaign headquarters. "Nobody should succumb to provocations, no violence, let's wait for the result."


Earlier, thousands of supporters lined the streets to welcome Chavez as he arrived at the school in a Caracas hillside slum where he cast his vote. Some handed him flowers, and one elderly woman serenaded the president with a folk song.


In poor neighborhoods where Chavez draws his most fervent following, supporters had blown bugles and trumpets in a predawn wake-up call. As dusk fell, hundreds gathered outside the Miraflores presidential palace, partying in anticipation of their man's victory and a speech later from its balcony.


Crews brought scaffolding for a stage, and revelers set off fireworks.


Despite his remarkable comeback from cancer, Chavez, 58, could not match the energy of his previous campaigns - or the pace set by his 40-year-old basketball-loving opponent.

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ShortTheUS's picture

RTRS: Various aides to Chavez published celebratory messages on Twitter, while some supporters of opposition leader Henrique Capriles began crying at his campaign center, Reuters witnesses said.

Looks like we won't have to ponder the thought experiment of what happens when a dictator loses an election. 

economics9698's picture

There will be a lot of dead people come dawn. 

francis_sawyer's picture

Hold the pickles, hold the lettuce, special orders don't upset us...

Bananamerican's picture

this comment and this thread represent a watershed moment in ZH shark jumping for me...

ACP's picture

Those aren't tanks, they're APCs. You know, the same thing that law enforcement is purchasing in the US in large numbers at this very moment.

ThePhysicist's picture

A reminder that dictators never lose elections. They only go feet first.

Patriot Eke's picture

Election officials are to Bankers as votes are to fiat.

"It doesn't matter who votes; it matters who counts the votes."

Arthur Borges's picture

Yeah, that's kinda fun. Tears came streaming down President Putin's face when his election victory was confirmed but perhaps those of Candidate Capriles had a somewhat more bitter twist to their taste.

moonstears's picture

"supporters of opposition leader Henrique Capriles began crying at his campaign center, Reuters witnesses said." Hell yeah they did, who knows what happens to them now.

A Nanny Moose's picture

In Soviet Russia, the Diebold machines operate you.

Arthur Borges's picture

Marshal Stalin once said that what mattered was not who voted, but who counted the vote. We are all sure Candidate Al Gore knows what the good marshal meant.

NoClueSneaker's picture

Saddam Chavez on the roll ....


To the honourable contributor: fuck you ...

RockyRacoon's picture

Headlines, NYT, just a few years from now:

As World Awaits U. S. Presidential Results, Tanks Enter DC
erg's picture

If they're not droid tanks.

q99x2's picture

The DC tanks are definitely headed for BK.

JustObserving's picture

In the land of the free, both candidates are owned by the moneyed interests and Wall Street.  Why would they destroy the illusion of democracy and freedom that some may have of the US by bringing tanks into the picture?

US elections are meaningless as far as important policy decisions are concerned.  They have already been made for you.  Republicans and Democrats are sides of the same fake coin. The few, like Goldman Sachs, always win no matter what the election result - and the average American invariably loses.  

US presidential elections are a billion dollar farce. And for saying that and undermining the finest democracy in the world, you can be imprisoned for the rest of your life without charge under the NDAA signed by Obama on Dec 31, 2011.

"On December 31, 2011, President Obama signed the National Defense Authorization Act (NDAA), codifying indefinite military detention without charge or trial into law for the first time in American history. The NDAA’s dangerous detention provisions would authorize the president — and all future presidents — to order the military to pick up and indefinitely imprison people captured anywhere in the world, far from any battlefield."

Inthemix96's picture

Excellent summary Justobserving.

I wonder though, just how many people who post here, who are members here, and who just muse the articles laugh out loud at the comments?  I wonder out of all who come past the pages of ZH, understand the magnitude of the position we as a world find ourselves in?  Do any one of you here understand we are going to witness in our lifetime within the next year or so the end of the system that has had us on our knees all of our lives.

Does no one understand why the powers that be are doing everything possible, even threatening us with WW3 to keep hold of the sand passing through their fingers?

This is it folks.  This is the real deal, the likes of O'bama, Geithner, Rubin, every last one of them are going to find out one, and only one thing.  How much their labour is worth.  That is what all this bullshit stems from, and goes back to.  Lets see the labour value of Bernenkenstein, lets see if Clinton can earn his wage in a fair and honest way doing something constructive, instead of bombing the fuck out of brown people.

This is an unbelieveable time to be alive, I for one cannot wait till the walls come down.  Lets see how well the pigmen at the top enjoy loosing the lot, not a little, not stealing our wages, not living while others starve and die to keep them in the comfort they think they are due.  But the whole fucking lot.  You see, they try and frighten us, some of us are naturally scared of powererful people, some are not, some could care less, and some are laughing at them.  You see, we are too many, we are legion, and they are not.  They are rightfully scared of the minions, for when even 5% of us are awake, we are even then too many.  Wait till 10, 20, 30% wake up, what then?  Fucking endgame, thats what.

Bring this fucker down folk, bring it all down....

ParkAveFlasher's picture

This has nothing to do with the elections.

The tanks are there to celebrate the birthday of Hugo Chavez aka El Guapo Fabuloso Generale Specificamente Mas Lindo Que El Otro Hombre. 

lolmao500's picture

Venezuela about to be liberated of it's oil.

dermus's picture

You only get liberated of your oil when you start talking about pricing it in euros/gold/anything but USD. If you're still willing to sell in USD, you get contained with sanctions.

RockyRacoon's picture

And it will be discovered that the ship Chavez dispatched to deliver the gold has had a "boating accident".   Seems to be a lot of that these days.

erg's picture

The greater the gold the greater the Bermuda Triangle affect.  An interdimensional rift siphoning our gold to protect what's left of another societies debauched keynesian disaster.

There's not enough gold in existence to monetize the universe.

DeFeralCat's picture

I just heard that they did a phone survey and found 800,000 extra Chavez votes.

RockyRacoon's picture

Ah, the far reaching arm of the BLS strikes again.  Just a seasonal adjustment -- get your vote right or it's killing season.

Monedas's picture

Feral Child .... is that you again ?  

Heyoka Bianco's picture

A wheeled APC is hardly a "tank". Shit, every droke -dick sheriff's dept. in Murica has one of those things for "surveillance". 

And picking up BK value meals for the whole shift.

erg's picture

I noticed that too. Maybe it was supposed to be picture of thanks. What's an h between friends?

dermus's picture

Those are not tanks, those are armoured cars, which serve as reconnaissance vehicles. A real tank would tear through them in a second.

davood's picture

That "Venezuela's next leader" looks like a zombie . . . a Polish Zionist Jewish kind who will certainly satisfy the wishes of the paidoff 10%, not to mention the Washington Consensus crowd.

ozziindaus's picture

No he's not lying. Radonski has Jewish ancestry.

dermus's picture

Okay, but who the fuck cares? There's people who are Keynesian socialist imbeciles who are Jewish and there are people who are Austrian school who are Jewish, i.e. Ludwig von Mises himself. There's also a lot of Keynesians who are not Jewish, i.e. Keynes himself.

The obsession some people have with Jews is completely insane. Ben Bernanke is Jewish as so was Greenspan, we get it. As if there weren't 100,000 possible non-Jewish replacements for him just as willing to print or more.

Instead of fighting socialism on an ideological basis, the racist retard wing of ZH insists on litering every argument with some reference to Jews, Zionism, ancestry, etc. Like no argument is complete without a fucking non-sequitur/ad hominem. Thanks assholes, just what we need.

ArrestBobRubin's picture

Moot point. Your boychik lost.

ozziindaus's picture

Sorry but I just don't trust the mother fuckers. Now begin the vote slam down 


Monedas's picture

You need to grow some thick pachidermus skin around here or you'll wind up as a lampshade !   Dermus is now on my top ten list of favourite Jooish names ! It just replaced Heime Forskin !

AnAnonymous's picture

Instead of fighting socialism on an ideological basis, the racist retard wing of ZH insists on litering every argument with some reference to Jews, Zionism, ancestry, etc.

Jewish people are a race?

Racism is constitutive of 'americanism'. Accordingly, a lot of racism is raging on this site.

Different types of racism are consequently not picked on the same.

Actually, the closer you get to racism, the less it is picked on.

It takes an 'american' to consider that thoughts on zionism is racism.

Dont worry, racism is an essential part of 'americanism'. It wont disappear from it.

But as 'americans' are fond of parading for what they are not, they label stuff as racism and oppose them.

Because it is well known, in 'american' values, such a collective assessment as racism, can not be 'american'. That is what is told in 'american' propaganda.

dermus's picture

Let's do this then.

The retard called Radonki a "Polish Zionist Jewish".

  1. Polish is a reference to race.
  2. Zionist is an ideology linked to a religion whos people, due to various particularities, in certain cases effectively constitute a several "races". (see later)
  3. Jewish is a reference to religion.

Let's point out that Radonski is Roman Catholic, and the retard called him Jewish. If his religion is Catholic (his father was a catholic of Sephardic ancestry, meaning generations ago), and the retard is calling him Jewish, it means the retard has a racial conception of "Jewish". Calling him a racist retard is therefore completely in line with his logic.

That said, he isn't 100% wrong in his equating Jewish with a race, and this is where a lot of people get confused (see point 2 above).

Because Judaism doesn't encourage, and in fact discourages (thought it's not impossible) conversion, unlike practically all other religions, there ends up being, over time, less racial divergence than would otherwise be the case. There are two main racial groups, Sepharad, and Ashkenaze, that serve as the two main racial sub populations that make up most Jews. To grossly over-simplify, Sepharads are Spanish/Italian, and Ashkenaze are German/Polish. Of course this doesn't cover everything.

Once you understand this, you understand that the retard meant Ashkenaze by Polish Jewish. So we are talking about race. Zonist is just in there because the retard simultaneously despises Jews, as a race, and thinks that the idea that they should have a nation-state where they can stay away from him is also intolerable. In other words, he treats them like a race/nation, but a race/nation that shouldn't exist. You consider being against zionism a "thought" like any other because you thought Judaism is simply a religion, and zionism is an idea void of historical logic. That's at least coherent based on your premise, and so it wouldn't be legitimate to charge you with being racist - you didn't have all the facts, and you've done nothing to deserve the charge.

Your commentary on the American tendency to label anything objectionable as racist is true in some regards. For example, anything that is pejorative in regards to Islam is considered racist, even though with Islam you're very obviously dealing with a religion and not a race. The reason is that many simply equate Arab with Muslim. That said, it's not strictly American. In France you have a lot of people equating anti-Islamism with racism.

The best way to look at it is that anything anti "third-world" is considered racist because the third-world is non-white. Islam is a third-world religion, and so being against it is considered racist. This isn't an American construct, rather it is a leftist construct.

Acet's picture

Well, if I was a paid shill trying to discredit the whole forum, I would do it by as often as possible taking discussions towards nutcase conspiracy theories and generic attacks on the basis of race, gender or religious affiliation.

That way most people that came to ZeroHedge would just dismiss most of the posts on this forum and thus the site itself as some kind of fringe wacko thing.


Frankly, myself I only hanged around 'cause I know enough of finance and economics to actually have spotted that most of the articles are written by people who know what they're talking about. The posts themselves range from the insightful to the lunatic with some guy-paid-to-discredit-the-forum ones inbetween.


moonstears's picture

Love seeing free speech excercised here! I too, tire of the racist poo, but guess it's the price we pay to speak/type freely and honestly according to our (very varied) opinions. dermus, good points, though. This divide and conquer shit works at so many levels, and this is an example. JMO bitchez!

CrashisOptimistic's picture

Venezuela's oil is sludge.


lolmao500's picture

Indeed. One barrel of Venezuelian oil = 10% can be turned into gasoline... compared with 40%+ using Texas's oil.

Yen Cross's picture

Fuck Chavez and his "saline injected" carcass!

Monedas's picture

Remember Panama's "Pineapple Face" president ?   Hugo Chavez is "Tank Tread Skid Mark Face" !  In my twenties, I had a fling with a girl who had acne in high school .... my friends called her "crater face" !   She was great in bed and gave good "face" .... in the dark !   Thanks for the memories !  I forgive you for not swallowing !

Monedas's picture

She was good in bed .... I was so so !

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