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European Union Wins Nobel Peace Prize
Ladies and gentlemen, we bring you EUtopia (and an early case of Friday humor).
The European Union has been awarded the 2012 Nobel Peace Prize in a nod to the 27-member bloc's "advancement of peace and reconciliation," and to applaud its solidarity as it continues to work to contain the debt crisis hanging over the euro zone.
The head of the Norwegian committee, Thorbørn Jagland, said the committee gave the award in an effort to encourage Europe to back away from the "extremism and nationalism" that led to major conflict in years past. "This is, in a way, a message to Europe to secure everything we have achieved and move forward," he said while addressing a packed crowd at the Nobel Norwegian Institute in Oslo on Friday.
"We don't have a position on how to solve the economic crisis, but we believe it will be important to solve it and that European unity can be kept so that Europe can move forward. There are many things to say about the economic crisis—where it originated, for instance. Actually, it started in the U.S. and all of us had to deal with it.
"Mr. Jagland said it is "up to the European Union" to decide what to do with the approximately $1.2 million in prize money that comes with the award. He also said the EU should decide how the award is ceremonially received.
Some other news: Bernard Madoff Investment Securities has not won the Nobel prize in economics yet.
The good news: Europe, for the first time in history, has a positive $1.2 million in equity value from the prize money, which is also the cash which will be promptly spent to fill those 0.0x fiscal (and monetary) multipliers of a failed regime, aka fill Belgian caterers' pockets.
The bad news: there is no Nobel prize for biggest Ponzi scheme conceivable, which would logically come with a prize so large even Spain would be saved. For at least one day.
We have reached out to the TOTUS to ask him how he feels that an endless monetary black hole - one he personally will be tasked with bailing out should he win the reelection - is now proudly carrying the peace torch for at least one year.
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What fantasy? Some troubles to come to terms with the choice for the peace prize?
.
Your American fantasy.
Rhetardical question. I suppose you think you deserve the peace prize for your roadside fecal sculptures.
'Americans' choose their own for attributing nobel prizes for peace.
Back to 'americanism' fantasy. Great... More fleeing...
Wont run though.
LOL!!! The European Union is nothing but a protectionist trading bloc. Strip away all the lofty idealistic rhetoric and that is all it ever has been.
It is a profoundly anti-democratic institution that has been set up principly to protect its grossly inefficient farmers - simultaneously ripping off its consumers and impoverishing more efficient producers from outside the EU.
My one hope from this whole Euro-debt debacle is that it leads to the overdue collapse of the EU and the freeloading mega-bureaucracy that supports it.
Maybe, but they are the best shot at democracy 'americans' living in Europe can do.
Evidence: the results in the democracy department was so important that their european institutions got the nobel prize for peace.
You distinguish who you can and even if 'american' europeans score low on democracy, that is still the best 'americans' can do.
In case anyone still had a shred of respect left for these @$$#01e$ after they gave the Nobel PEACE prize to the Kenyan Usurper for his support of perpetual WAR all over the planet, this eliminates it.
It takes an 'american' to outdo another 'american'.
The 'american' negro sitting in the oval office could only be outdone by other 'americans', here, nothing less than the 'american' dream, as dreamt by 'americans' residing in the US.
HEIL-ARIOUS!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wALQnGVeu6Y&feature=plcp
How about the Anders Behring Braevik "I'm mad as Hell .... and won't take it any more .... sanity prize .... with Tim McVeigh oak leaf cluster !"
"Some other news: Bernard Madoff Investment Securities has not won the Nobel prize in economics yet."
That's because they'd rather give it to Jon Corzine. Who knows, he went long on Greek bonds, so perhaps he gets a share of the Peace Prize too.
The EU should use the money for a shark pool, and charge admission for watching leaders of Southern Europe jump it on scooters.
Alfred Nobel must be doing 360s in his grave.
Spot on yen, it's an obscenity to be awarding the EU a peace prize. Talk about out of touch, it's the EU cronies giving themselves a pat on the head for doing the opposite of creating peace, even in Europe. I wonder how they explain away Libya? Actually, I don't think I want to know.
Preposterous
The prime reason that France and Germany stopped going to war was the mutual threat from the USSR. Ergo the USSR should have been given the Nobel Peace Prize - posthumously
Where was the EU in the 1990's when hundreds of thousands were dying in the Balkans - sitting on, wringing, clasping its hands whilst it waited for Uncle Sam to get it sorted - why - because, true to form, Germany supported Croatia, and France supported Serbia - had they got involved it would have been - WW1 - The Sequel.
Henceforth the EU shall be known as the - Recycled Union of Former Independent European States - RUFIES for short - lures countries into its arms, then it ...
YC
Astounding. This one is just too easy.
In short, when Europe leads the planet into the tank and the global economy collapses, at least Europe will have a shiny self-made and self-awarded trophy to stare at.
Primary 3 down is pending: http://bullandbearmash.com/chart/standard-poors-500-weekly-october-05-2012/
It's ironic that Barry received one first.
CAN SOMEONE PLEASE WAKE ME UP FROM THIS HORRIBLE MOVIE !!!
Hollywood style, hollywood style...
I only need 4 more cereal box tops until I can send away for my Nobel Peace Prize (send 2 million dollars for shipping and handling). Problem is mom won't buy me another box until I finish the one I have. Reese's Puffs for breakfast, lunch and dinner baby!
I think having a prize like that gets you a discount on drones.
I was watching the european bloomberg when it was announced. Even the anchors said they originally thought it was a joke. You know things are bad when even the cheerleaders on TV are duped.
Clinton killed innocent children in their mother's arms ! Braevik killed Quisling Socialist Activist Norwegian Brown Sewer Rats ! Not an easy choice .... but I give Braevik a slight moral advantage .... relatively .... all things considered !
I can't wait for Farage video for this.
The idea that the EU has been an agent of peace in Europe is preposterous, as 'americans' are fond of.
Back to the 1900s, a war between certain european nations came with the outcome of determining the world hegemon. The world hegemon was in those days a european nation. It was about eliminating a rival to climb higher in the power ladder.
Today, the situation is totally changed. The US of A is the world hegemon. Germany taking on France would do nothing to oust the US as the world hegemon.
Not only that, but after the result of the two world wars, that the US used in order to declare hegemony on the world, the lesson is served.
'Americans' residing in Europe perfectly know that if they go at war against each other, it wont conclude with a gain of power for the winner on the world chessboard but a loss of power on the world.
If Germany is ranked xth on the world scale before the war and manage to defeat France and UK, the outcome will be that Germany will be ranked x+n th, going down as some other countries like Brazil, China, India or Russia would seize the opportunity to climb up the power ladder just as the US did.
That is why you are very unlikely to see wars in Europe because the outcome, contrary to the past, no matter who the winner is, will be a loss of power for the winner and not a gain of power as it used to be.
You could get rid of the EU, peace among European nations wont be more threatened as it is now.
and I give you a greenie for a most cogent analysis of the reasons of wars for imperial hegemony
2 hours later and I'm still waiting for the onion to pop up on this one.
operari sequitur esse
Everyone in Europe is just glad it was paid in Swedish kronor. Now, they can all get together in Brussells for anoher meeting and still fly their national carriers. They can go one more year without having to fly Ryanair or have to take a taxi instead of be picked up by limo at the airport.
What will the meeting be about? Who the fuck knows? Has any E.U. meeting actually produced any results in the past 5 years?
It should be given to Burlesconi and Sarkozy; at least you know you'd get a good party out of them. The Page 6 photos would be worth it. Just imagine how much fun they could have had taking Silvio's yacht up to Oslo.
The next prize should go to Israel. And the one after that to the Abrahamic religions.
I don't think at all it should, but I'm afraid - no, I'm sure - it will go to Israel sooner or later. The way they make all western politicians bend and ''bent''.
Rompuy looks demonic.
Only bankers get rewarded for expected results.
The rest of us must actually produce results to get a reward. That's what the ruling class always told us, right?
* European Union
wonder if they'll send the Spanish police in to accept the award?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=hzP8znpQI9I
Someone is laughing.
Hubris personified
Just goes to show you that maybe jumping off the crazytrain wasn't such a good idea after all.
Now you can get hit by it instead of gazing serenely at the passing scenery on the way to Perdition.
Brussels Wins Peace Prize.
Ooh...Look at the cows. I like cows.
The prize is now the perfect contrarian indicator for WAR
Just spat tea all over my mobile. You just could not make this shit up. E U wins peace prize? While involved in wars in Iraq, Afghanistan, Libya, Syria, Pakistan, Sudan and Iran. What next? Jimmy saville for his work with children?
What utter rubbish, The chairman of the Norwegian Nobel committee Thorbjorn Jagland is also the Secretary-General of the Council of Europe so… the EU has just awarded itself a peace prize.
the Council of Europe is a separate entity from the EU (that has a Council, too, just to make it more confusing)
MOTHER FUCKERSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Herman Van Rompuy begins masturbating...
With a carrot.
Well if the Nobel braintrust can deliver the hat trick next year of three years running with a Peace Prize winner coming from nowhere but out of their clearly politically motivated ass, they will seal the deal of utterly trashing the prize's credibilty for at least a generation. Start your list guys, next year's pick needs to be a doozy to stand next to these last two.
Guys, this is really too much, too much.
I'm happen to be an universitarian teacher among other things, I don't fucking know what, WHAT I'm gonna tell my students... I've been using Orwell and Huxley for some time but it isn't enough anymore... HOW, HOW in the HELL I'll find something to say to them other than "kids, you're gonna have to start building from the very basement, there isn't nothing left..."
SHIT, if it wasn't so fucking outrageous it would be hilarious.
A thorny dilemma indeed.
Kind of like for "good" americans, the challenge to explain to themselves and their children how a draft dogder, drug user, failed businessman, cheerleader(!!!), 75 IQ human could become their president.
American children have been 'left right behind" ever since.
My sympathies.
ori
The 2012 Nobel Peace Prize is worth EUR 922,213, or about 1.06 minutes of the average Eurozone interest costs in 2012.
http://info.navigator-consulting.com/blog/bid/233294/What-s-a-Nobel-Peac...
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