The Pre-Debate Malarkey: Drinking Game And Why The Election Should Not Be For "The Shiniest Of Two Turds"

Tyler Durden's picture

The battle lines are set; the VeePs have stepped in (we laughed and we grimaced); and now its time for main-event. In preparation for this evening's Town-Hall style debate, we present the critical-to-enjoyment drinking game rules and live webcast scorecard (which stands at Team Obama 1 - 1 Team Romney) but perhaps more importantly, we offer the most epic rap-battle version of the debate with an eagle-riding Abraham Lincoln delivering these infamous words to the two challengers: "By the power vested in me by the power of this bald bird, the president shall not be shiniest of two turds." Indeed, Abe, indeed.

 

Via @DebateDrinking

1st 'Presidential' Debate Results:

 

2nd 'VeeP' Debate Results:

 

3rd 'Presidential' Debate Rules:

Additional drinking opportunities

If you find yourself feeling more sober than you'd like, consider the following suggestions. Keep in mind, these rules do not affect the candidates' scores on the big board.

Start the night off with a gimme – Take a drink for each person or organization that your candidate thanks in his opening remarks.

If your candidate has any type of numbered or multi-step plan – Take one drink for each number.

Each time you see your candidate force an awkward grin or laugh while his opponent is insulting him or disparaging his policies – Take a drink.

 

Live Scoring Webcast:

 

and the Epic Rap Battle - that must be seen (and heard) to be believed: