Capitalism At Work: Twinkies Soar On Ebay

Tyler Durden's picture




 

The invisible hand at work once again as fat-fingered demand dominates union-stifled supply... $8,000 for a single Twinkie... and other offers... It seems, once again, that there are more than a few greater fools who still have no idea just how the bankruptcy process works... will Twinkies be rebranded Bimbettes?

 

 

and Via Mashable:

Here’s what’s currently up for sale and bid on eBay:

There is, however, a small problem for all those hoping for a collectible value on Hostess products after today, and lifting these ridiculous ebay bids: Grupo Bimbo, who wanted to buy Hostess outright in 2006, will almost certainly buy the various now defunct trademarks in a Stalking Horse liquidation auction, and will absolutely continue making them (as we discussed here) collapsing any residual value as Twinkies will be found, in the same identical box, in a grocery store near you.

Sadly, having zero understanding of the bankruptcy process never stopped Americans from making decisions: such as taking one's words for what would happen to America's auto industry had contract law not been inverted several years ago and it the car companies had "failed."

(h/t Dominic Chu)

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Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:15 | 2989336 mayhem_korner
Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:16 | 2989357 knukles
knukles's picture

Note to Benji:
Take this as an example.  Quit printing and good things happen.
From the Twinkie School of Modern Economics
(Summarily replaces Keynesian, neo-Keyenesian and Krugmanesque schools, in their entirety)

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:20 | 2989377 Temporis
Temporis's picture

Wonder why Obama didn't bail out Hostess...

 

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:24 | 2989404 knukles
knukles's picture

He don't need any more twinks.... 

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:42 | 2989512 economics9698
economics9698's picture

The party is over.  Valarie Jarrett is gonna get even now.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:56 | 2989572 knukles
knukles's picture

I was thinkin' more along the lines of Reggies' Love Canal

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 17:16 | 2989655 Transformer
Transformer's picture

Shit, it's the end of the world.  For sure this is it, things are really gonna fall apart now.  AJ is openly calling for the overthrow of the government, the ME war is starting, and now this.  It's over, man.... over.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 17:27 | 2989691 fuu
fuu's picture

Witness the horror of peak twinkie.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 18:26 | 2989886 CrockettAlmanac.com
CrockettAlmanac.com's picture

Twinkie Shrugged.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 18:41 | 2989913 Race Car Driver
Race Car Driver's picture

No one saw it coming.

Sat, 11/17/2012 - 02:18 | 2990205 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Maybe is paranoia, but Boris is prescient to collapse of 2009 Twinkie market and is BTFD, now has 1.2 metric tonnage of Twinkie in cellar. But expiration date is problematic and is tepidly rancid. But if dip in Vodka, not bad!

Sat, 11/17/2012 - 13:46 | 2991850 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

It's contained to subprime Sno-Balls

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 18:44 | 2989918 nmewn
nmewn's picture

What will Michelle have to hate on now?

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 19:33 | 2990008 Dr. Sandi
Dr. Sandi's picture

'New' Twinkies. Just like original twinkies, but with 10% more HFCS for flavor and zest appeal.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 20:20 | 2990187 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

In Russia is Vinkies, but Boris is not privy for how inject vodka jell-o into cake. Maybe is good idea in America because is Twinkies EOL!?

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 23:49 | 2990769 FrankDrakman
FrankDrakman's picture

Witness the horror of peak twinkie.

 

I used to enjoy the horror of Twin Peakies.. are they related?

Sat, 11/17/2012 - 13:45 | 2991849 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

Ding Dong Bubble.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:25 | 2989411 iDealMeat
iDealMeat's picture

I ran out for lunch, and just for fun I thought I get one..  Tried 2 grocery stores and a 7-11..  NONE....

crazy..

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:27 | 2989428 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

 

 

It's just a warm up for the real grocery store runs that are coming soon...

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 18:38 | 2989905 bugs_
bugs_'s picture

and re-watch the videos of the Sandy gas lines for more of whats coming

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:28 | 2989437 john39
john39's picture

sadly, the world will not end as someone will buy the brand our of bankruptcy and mine more of the filling to keep Americans safe and happy with their twinkies.  living in the civilized world is such a wonderful thing.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:35 | 2989469 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

just 'someone'?... You're too nice...

We all know who will buy these brands (directly or indirectly via printing money out of thin air)... Addios 18,000 employees...

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:30 | 2989449 true brain
true brain's picture

the 18000 workers suddenly out of a job are hoarding them for the days ahead. they will need them.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 19:04 | 2989953 jekyll island
jekyll island's picture

I remember going on a field trip as a kid to the Hostess bakery in St. Louis. Twinkies on a conveyer belt farther than my six year old eyes could see. hostess apple pies coming out of the fryer and hundreds of them snaking over your head on a steel mesh conveyer, you could look up at them. Good times. I guess the union got what was coming to it.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 19:43 | 2990044 Dr. Sandi
Dr. Sandi's picture

Yeah, that's what I thought at first.

Then I considered who was doing the negotiating for the union. Almost certainly crackhead teams of negotiators brought in to deal with the company's crackhead team of negotiators. Neither set of negotiators would give a damn about the company or the union. They're just hired guns who are good at cracking skulls.

And the end result is what we keep seeing way too often. Another company closes up shop, thousands of workers lose their jobs, the hired guns move on to the next company with the fat bonus they got for 'doing their best.'

The workers let their union get out of hand, just like the rest of us have let our government get out of hand. So ultimately it's the workers to blame for a bad union, the same as it's citizens to blame for a bad government.

When things get too big for we mere humans to have any say, they really need to be collapsed down to a size where we can at least be heard before being ignored.

And on the flip side, how about those Hostess Honchos? They'll liquidate, and pay themselves nice bonus packages for parting out the company in an orderly fashion. I wonder how much of the pension fund has already been borrowed to maintain operating expenses of the company during the strike.

And the poor dumb investors who own the liquidated shares? They can go down and swap stories with the former bakers around a burning can of trash on a street corner somewhere.

So yeah, those damn bakers got just what they deserve. Just as we all will, if we follow the yellow twinkie road we've been on.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 20:30 | 2990226 jekyll island
jekyll island's picture

It takes two to tango. I'm sure the workers saw the big shots getting their bonuses and asking them to take a paycut. Doesn't make for cordial discussions.

Sat, 11/17/2012 - 00:06 | 2990803 FrankDrakman
FrankDrakman's picture

There was a game theory experiment, where A was given a dollar, and told he had to offer some of it to B. If B rejected the offer, the dollar was taken back from A. Rational theory suggested that A should only offer a penny, since that was a penny more than B had initially. However, when A's offered low-ball amounts, B's soundly rejected them. Even though the B's lost out on the small amount the A's offered, they preferred to punish the A's. Anger and resentment can overwhelm rationality.

I think the union did the same thing here. They were fed up watching the bosses loot the company while telling the workers they were lucky they had a job. At some point, any human being with pride says "If you're going to keep screwing me, I'm going to screw you back".

I'm rarely on the side of organized labour, but in this case, I think they treated very badly by management, and reacted more out of anger and spite than rationality.

Sun, 11/18/2012 - 22:40 | 2994933 cynicalskeptic
cynicalskeptic's picture

ANother example of privage equity 'loot an pillage'.  Long time company - profitable and established - is bought out qwith borrowed money.  Company is loaded up with debt to pay off the private equity firm.  The comapny is starved of investment capital so nothing is improved or maionrtained.  Any cash in pensions or elsewhere is looted.   Employees are squeezed and squeezed (except for the top executives who make out like bandits).

The company dies - a well established brand name dies or is sold off to some other company and all the company employees (except a select few at the top) get screwed.  US taxpayers eat the bill for a looted pension fund - though the payouts turne out to be minimal - no wheres near what employees were due.  

But the private equity firm walks away with millions.

 

About the worst way to use capital as possible - completely extractive, parasitic and deadly to the host.  At least in nature when a parasite kills its host it dies if unable to find a new host.   Not these guys.  More destructive than barbarian hordes.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:26 | 2989421 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

 

 

...cuz Mooschelle can now sell her stash and make a mint.  Those hips are a clear sign of a closet Twinkie swallower.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 17:30 | 2989702 fockewulf190
fockewulf190's picture

Maybe a new owner will rename Twinkies to Shlongs.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 17:47 | 2989765 STP
STP's picture

Yeah, anything cream-filled will do....

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 19:26 | 2989992 brak
brak's picture

release the strategic twinkie reserves

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:27 | 2989427 Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

nobody in DC had calls

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:28 | 2989432 JeffB
JeffB's picture

The election is over.

 

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 17:11 | 2989639 zerozulu
zerozulu's picture

He might have done. Hostess from Hooters.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 17:46 | 2989760 markovchainey
markovchainey's picture

They don't make grape soda...

 

(I tried to resist, I really tried)

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 19:56 | 2990099 Hayabusa
Hayabusa's picture

Hostess didn't get bailed out by NoBama because they didn't

help him get reelected with a large enough "donation"...

simple.

Sat, 11/17/2012 - 09:54 | 2991416 northerngirl
northerngirl's picture

His wife would not let him.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:24 | 2989382 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

This dude is gonna get famous real fast...

HOW TO MAKE A TWINKIE AT HOME

~~~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zGKsWrpsKtI

(ps ~ I've tried the recipe a few years ago & it basically works)

@hedgeless_horseman ~ we're all counting on foto captions of an IMPROVED version of this from Mrs. HH, pronto!

Good luck... We're all counting on you...

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 17:07 | 2989618 CPL
CPL's picture

I would make sure there are some financial options available when the investors switch from FIAT to Twinkies.

 

Twinkie Backed Deposit Twist

Agressive Leverage Hostess Twinkie Takeover

Turnkey Twinkie Solution, it's Revolutionary!!

 

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:19 | 2989373 tallen
Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:35 | 2989467 fuu
Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:22 | 2989389 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture

I was tempted to have the little woman pick up a couple of cases when she was out today.

(Biden 2016 I knew a Man Bo Jangles, he would dance for you, then we would go into the Champagne room)

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:30 | 2989450 Upswaller
Upswaller's picture

$8000 for a Twinkie? A whole new meaning to Ho-Ho's

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:59 | 2989588 Esso
Esso's picture

Hell yeah, 8Gs for a twinkie! Twinkies represent real value unlike that icky ol' gold & silver you can just dig out of the ground for five bucks.

Plus you can eat 'em! Mmmmmmmmmm, high fructose corn syrupy gluten carbo goodness.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 17:14 | 2989649 CPL
CPL's picture

Ding dongs is where to corner the market.  Ho-ho's are good for a hedge though.  BUY SELL BUY SELL!!!  MARK THAT SHIT AND GET IT TO THE PITS!!!  RUN!

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:34 | 2989463 takeaction
takeaction's picture

This guy bought these a month in the future....how did he do that?

http://www.ebay.com/itm/BOX-OF-TWINKIES-Unopened-FRESH-/300817976083?pt=...

 

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 17:15 | 2989626 CPL
CPL's picture

Because Canada has managed to hold onto the coveted technology of Twinkie manufacturing and Joe Louis.  Vachon holds the license in this neck of the woods.  

 

Thank god, I was worried I wouldn't have anything to go with my Pepsi while wearing my touque

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 17:53 | 2989783 STP
STP's picture

Hey, I'm ex-French Canadian and I'll tell you what, SCREW the twinkies!  The American public has never experienced the Vachon line of goodies and why aren't the Coffee Crisps sold in the U.S.?

I live in California and my Mom just got here a week ago and she brought me 10 Coffee Crisps, plus the Vachon pastries and they kick butt on Twinkies!

You aint had nothing, until you had one of Vachon's flaky pastries

 http://www.vachon.com/en/pastries/flaky-pastries/#passionPommeFramboise

 

 

 

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