Today's "Fiscal Cliff Compromise" Moment Brought To You By The Congressional Short Squeeze Inception Team

Tyler Durden's picture


Once again the market falls for the politicians' snake oil (as we explained before). Unconvinced? This is what none other than "Fiscal Cliff compromise is imminent" photo op participant Nancy Pelosi said moments later to the WSJ:

Ms. Pelosi said. "I was focusing on how we send a message of confidence to consumers, to the markets in the short run, too."

And there you have it from the horse's mouth: absolutely nothing of actual substance in today's presser which was completely hollow of anything remotely resembling an actual compromise, but merely the same type of  Euro-propaganda we have grown to loath and despise for the past 3 years, where a flashing red headline was supposed to generate a short squeeze. It succeeded.

There is one open question: did Nancy Pelosi's multi-millionaire investor husband Paul Pelosi know ahead of time what the announcement would say, and did he buy any securities in hopes of a "short run" gain?

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Fri, 11/16/2012 - 15:56 | 2989221 redpill
redpill's picture

I'm sure you were, you inside trading cuntface.


Fri, 11/16/2012 - 15:56 | 2989229 Temporis
Temporis's picture

Ms. Pelosi is indeed a horse.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 15:57 | 2989239 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Wait, she spoke an honest sentence?

Wow, she must be off her meds!

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:02 | 2989263 MillionDollarBogus_
MillionDollarBogus_'s picture

Pelosi is speaking in code.

She used the word 'short', which is a secret...(well, was as secret)..signal to short the markets.

Had she used the word 'long', it would have been the buy signal...

If she ever uses the word 'liquid', then you sell

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:07 | 2989305 Richard Chesler
Richard Chesler's picture

A message of cuntfidence.

Should be no problem for the thieving whore.


Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:12 | 2989335 jcaz
jcaz's picture

Horses' mouth?   With Nancy, that's 180 degrees off......

Now I see why Corzine isn't sweating a thing.....


Fri, 11/16/2012 - 17:08 | 2989617 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Of course her husband, herself & all her cat-eyed, face lifted friends & relatives positioned themselves well ahead of today's pre-planned meaningless dribble-fest.

At any rate, there have to be up days that provide exit points for the big dump that is already underway. 50 or 100 or 365 or 3,560 consecutive down days (i.e. Nikkei extrapolated/condensed over 23 years) wouldn't let the holders of large batches of ticker symbols do an orderly unwind, right?

For those who don't have Mrs. Pelosi's inside network, there's an all clear to short the ever living shit out vacuous and vaporous tickers/confetti since we're actually in a depression if one were to deduct deficit spending, consider the number of Americans surviving based on federal and state direct transfer payments of one form or many (SNAP-EBT, SSI, Social Security, Medicare-Medicaid, UI, extended UI, etc.), subtract the number (in percentage terms) of government employees at the federal, state and local unit levels we now have versus that which we had in the 1920's run-up to The Great Depression, calculate the true, broad rate of unemployment/signficant underemployment & also the true decline in the labor force participation rate, account for the % of GDP that is actually present due to inflation versus increased consumption or productivity, consider the relative composition of consumption by private economic actors versus governmental or quasi-governmental ones, and do even a rough calculation as to how much government consumption that's now 44% funded by deficit spending is comprising total GDP.

Recoupling, brah.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 17:15 | 2989652 Rathmullan
Rathmullan's picture

pelosi galore's short run = the time it takes her husband to sell his stock --all of which were purchased on inside information

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 17:17 | 2989662 Atlas_shrugging
Atlas_shrugging's picture

Please.  That type of behavior would be considered crony capitalism.  Not in the USA...never.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 18:30 | 2989890 Michaelwiseguy
Michaelwiseguy's picture

Pelosi Cuntfidence is a subjective mindset not based in reality. I hate that fucking bitch.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 21:08 | 2990325 Ident 7777 economy
Ident 7777 economy's picture

That statement is not very clear ... spoken by the 'master' of such phrases, however (Michael).

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 18:09 | 2989837 WhiteNight123129
WhiteNight123129's picture

desperation is profound on this blog.... <nervous laugh>

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:00 | 2989256 FL_Conservative
FL_Conservative's picture

I think Tyler typoed there. It was supposed to be the whores' mouths.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 21:09 | 2990333 stocktivity
stocktivity's picture

Talks today were "constructive".  "Constructive" was the Bullshit word of the day that jacked up the market. By the way...It's all Bullshit!

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:01 | 2989259 CClarity
CClarity's picture

When will they give up on the "wealth effect" already?  Hasn't been working for some time now.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:08 | 2989312 1100-TACTICAL-12
1100-TACTICAL-12's picture

I feel more confident , Thanks Nancy.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:11 | 2989325 pods
pods's picture

Reading Nancy Pelosi and Short Squeeze in the same article makes me turtle.


Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:39 | 2989488 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

Everyone except MDB became an innie for at least a few minutes.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:02 | 2989276 takeaction
takeaction's picture

Watch....I am going to say Dow (-64) by close today.  Everyday this market has been gamed by the ones still sitting at the black jack table.  I refuse to play. 

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 15:57 | 2989241 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

Pelosi and her HF hub own more AAPL than Fidelity at this point.  Shouldn't make you wonder she is worried about financing her next face lift with AAPL in a tailspin.  

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:39 | 2989493 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

She will announce free Obama iPads and then sell.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:43 | 2989516 adr
adr's picture

She should have sold at $715 and gone for the whole total body makeover. Complete new face, tits, butt, maybe vocal cord modulation. If we have to listen to the queen of the crab people, at least she could make it bearable.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 17:09 | 2989625 John Law Lives
John Law Lives's picture

There is not enough botox on the planet to make that crone look presentable.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 15:59 | 2989252 Mactheknife
Mactheknife's picture

LMAO....Nah, she's just trying to give everyone one last chance to get out before this thing goes bidless.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 17:02 | 2989598 Richard Head
Richard Head's picture

If there's one person in the world who deserves to be called a cunt, it's Pelosi.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 21:27 | 2990383 Eireann go Brach
Eireann go Brach's picture


Sat, 11/17/2012 - 00:54 | 2990902 MrBoompi
MrBoompi's picture

Republican hypocrites are the biggest douchebags on the planet

Fuck you

Mon, 11/19/2012 - 08:14 | 2995444 mtomato2
mtomato2's picture


Off-topic much?

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 15:57 | 2989223 Temporis
Temporis's picture


Fri, 11/16/2012 - 15:59 | 2989233 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

'Be confident out there, oh great some stawks'

Drawing and quartering by horses for 'Ms. Pelosi' would be far too humane.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:13 | 2989339 Bay of Pigs
Bay of Pigs's picture

Listening to anything she says just confirms how absolutely fucked the country is going forward.

What a despicable and obnoxious human being she is.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:30 | 2989447 XitSam
XitSam's picture

Nancy is communicating a message. She is focused on sending a message of confidence. I have confidence this is all going to end badly.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 18:19 | 2989869 dracos_ghost
dracos_ghost's picture

And yet the algos gobbled it up and the shorts pussied out.

Say whatever you want -- advantage Pelosi. May she rot in fucking hell. But advantage to her none the less.

So for the next two weeks, the "pundits" will socialize "all is well with the fiscal cliff" on the Sunday talk show circuit and people will scream to get back in the market. Every down tick will have a glorious newsflash as a kick save ala Eurodaze.

Sheeple deserve to be fleeced. Gimme my fucking Obama phone dammit.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 15:58 | 2989240 Fancy_Piglosi
Fancy_Piglosi's picture

I was pumpin and dumpin bitchez!

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:41 | 2989500 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

not with a picture of madame piglosi nearby

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:02 | 2989260 Ineverslice
Ineverslice's picture


haaaa!'bout, Black Friday comes a week early.

Dear God lady, what is your excuse?

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:01 | 2989266 azengrcat
azengrcat's picture

The Pelosi's were running low on Bollinger and Cubans.  They hit the Muppet ATM for some moar benanks.  

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:03 | 2989270 spooz
spooz's picture

  Bank of America is counting on the stock market vigilantes to force a deal.  Gotta keep those banks afloat.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:07 | 2989304 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

I don't care what they call themselves.  They are giving me INTC at 20 with a 4.5% yield going into an upgrade cycle as it retests a breakout from a multi-year trading range.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:09 | 2989313 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture


Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:27 | 2989410 spooz
spooz's picture

yup, the tail wagging the dog.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:54 | 2989564 jomama
jomama's picture

wish there was a source of this that wasn't some right-wingbat website...

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:04 | 2989280 Cursive
Cursive's picture

The Market.  The Market.  The Market.  The Market.

The Market.  The Market.  The Market.  The Market.

The Market.  The Market.  The Market.  The Market.  The Market.

The Market.  The Market.  The Market.  The Market.  The Market.

The Market.  The Market.  The Market.  The Market.  The Market.

The Market.  The Market.  The Market.  The Market.  The Market.

The Market.  The Market.  The Market.  The Market.  The Market.

The Market.  The Market.  The Market.  The Market.  The Market.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:47 | 2989529 Water Is Wet
Water Is Wet's picture

Because "the system."

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:03 | 2989284 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

every time I see this ugly old bitch I think that some man has actually fucked that thing. Then I go puke

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:42 | 2989513 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

Thanks Azz. I cannot un-visualize that now. Could create some issues for me this weekend.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:04 | 2989286 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

Obviously they have figured out that a tax raise in a depression is a shitty idea and are trying to erase all memory of the fact they ever brought it up.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:05 | 2989294 Cursive
Cursive's picture


No doubt, but how do you cut services without major social unrest?  Rock, meet hard place.

Fri, 11/16/2012 - 16:12 | 2989329 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

This problem can only be dealt with by making it bigger.  Sociopolitick 101.  I am being sincere.

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