Monday Humor: Sex Sells... Japanese Bonds

Tyler Durden's picture

As many prepare for the imminent demise of the JPY (courtesy of Abe's aggression), Mike Krieger of Liberty Blitzkrieg reminds us of possibly the greatest (and most unbelievably hilarious) financial advertisement ever. From our friends across the ocean, "Men that own government bonds are popular with the ladies!" Don't believe its real? Bloomberg story here.



(h/t Mike Krieger)

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Parrotile's picture

The Government may be "working on the economy", but methinks a good analogy would be the "Crash Team" in your local Hospital "working on" a very-much-beyond-resuscitation former person, 'cause they HAVE to be SEEN to be DOING SOMETHING.

An alternative viewpoint is yes, they ARE working on the economy - but the goals they seek do not (necessarily) co-incide with goals that are to your benefit. A LOT of Corporate money went into Obama's re-election campaign: Those donors no doubt are expecting a good return on their investment.

EmmittFitzhume's picture

Another content-free message brought to you by MDB

SokPOTUS's picture

Dudes will tell *any* lie to get laid.  I had a buddy in college - no better looking than I - and as much of a business major conservative as I was - who racked up score after score after score.  Meanwhile, I got a nibble just now and again.

Finally, I couldn't take it anymore and asked him what the hell he was doing that was working so well.

His M.O. was to pretend that he was a big Lib...this was '83-'86 time frame...and since he was a new wave music fan, he could talk the talk...

It was nothing but a selfish, cynical ploy to score.

Worked like a charm on stupid, liberal college women.  I adopted some of his schtick to raise my 'batting average', so to speak, but I just couldn't bring myself to be that shameless.

Of course, he's married now as am I; both to conservative women.  The liberal ones were just cannon fodder to use and abuse.




Diogenes's picture

No one ever fantasized about being ravished by someone dressed as a liberal.

Sands8oo's picture

I buy silver and regularly wack some of the hottest pussy on the planet

Freewheelin Franklin's picture

stop freaking out about the economy – the government is working on it


Um, yeah. That's what we are worried about.

Ass_Hat's picture

...Come to think of it....I can't remember the last time a hotty asked me about my favorite brand of piss filter or even laughed at any of my Eddie Willers jokes.

Ass_Hat's picture

...Come to think of it....I can't remember the last time a hotty asked me about my favorite brand of piss filter or even laughed at any of my Eddie Willers jokes.

Ass_Hat's picture

...Come to think of it....I can't remember the last time a hotty asked me about my favorite brand of piss filter or even laughed at any of my Eddie Willers jokes.

economics9698's picture

Herding the sheep into the slaughter stockade. 

redpill's picture

Dude you are getting creepy.  Stop talking about Karl Rove, really.

economics9698's picture

The dude has a boner for Rove.

NewThor's picture



kaiserhoff's picture

Barry has the hots for Rove and has joined ZH?  Who knew?

SMG's picture

You seem to have some sort of man crush on Karl.  Perhaps you should write him a love letter and tell him how you feel.

blunderdog's picture

Karl Rove's criminal and scum and all that, but "war criminal" is a pretty easily disprovable claim.  The guy never held any real *government* power at all. 

He was just an enabler of war criminals.

Ya oughta find a new schtick.  Your contributions certainly aren't doing anything to help the public discourse.

Ignatius's picture

Nice how you slipped that in there. 

I got the same warm fuzzy as when the guy told Cheney to go f*ck himself.

knightowl77's picture

ummmm I think Cheney told Senator Leahy to go F$#% himself on the Senate floor....I actually approved of that

Popo's picture

Well, considering that ZeroHedge doesn't actually "sell" ads, and they're all just served via Google.  It takes nothing to get the advertisers.

NewThor's picture

I always wonder is Zerohedge CIA or KGB or MOSSAD or Northern Illuminati or Goldman Sachs undercover headfake or other.

Occam's Razor says Tyler Durden "probably" isn't Batman, but that stupid razor ain't always right.


who knows?

MAYBE he is Hyrum Graff (Played by Harrison Ford in the upcoming 'Ender's Game')'s picture

Tyler's identity is out there if you look for it. The site is registered with a Bulgarian address. Those folks are extremely civilized.

NewThor's picture

I'm a HUGE fan of Tyler.


Father always said

"Trust no one."'s picture

So true. Although Tyler isn't one, he is many.

BKbroiler's picture

Tyler = Drudge...

Wasn't always this way.  The blogspot years and the first couple on here the discussions were a lot more highbrow, smart people, some partisan as fuck, but the exchanges were awesome.  Cheeky Bastard was a trip, even Trav777's crazy racist ass was fun.  The problem came when Rush Limbaugh gave ZH a mention early last year, now it's the dumbest factions of the GOP here all the time posting wannabe libertarian ideologies because they heard their first Ron Paul speech on youtube and think they're original.

ZerOhead's picture

Cheeky was epic...

Miss those days too.

economics9698's picture

I really like ZH because it is one of the few places where there is free speech.  I throw out the racial shit because a lot of the time it is true but also to test Tyler.

All I can say is Tyler is for real.  He’s the man.

francis_sawyer's picture

I don't give a shit about anybody's 'LEGACY STATUS'...

The content was what it was a few years ago because not everybody was yet thoroughly convinced that TEOTWAWKI was upon us and still held out hope...

It's a complete & absolute carnival now... Embrace the horror...

economics9698's picture

With facebook and the internet I think people can find this chart and figure out what it means.  Just a guess.[1][id]=DFII10

francis_sawyer's picture

It's a goddamned 'Monday Humor' thread and they come looking for the 'Meaning of [MANIPULATED PAPER] life'... Sheesh!

francis_sawyer's picture

Well played sir :-)...


Jeez people... It's goddamned 'Thanksgiving short week' in a manipulated electronic paper 'MARKET'... Nobel Peace Prize winning Obama just won a 2nd term to office... & Netanyahu is bombing the shit out of little kids in Gaza...

You're probably going to have to go to your 'in laws' (who you hate), with your wife (who is either nagging at you, or is sleeping with your best friend) for dinner this weekend and eat a bunch of shitty GMO food you don't like (while fielding questions on your opinion about what stocks to buy)...


Jus pick up Jalen Parmele & Ronnie Hillman off the waiver wire for your fantasy football team (which is 4-6 right now because all the fucks you drafted either got injured or have Matt Cassel as QB)... Plug 'em into your lineup & things will look better come December (except for the fact there will still be a wookiee First Lady)...

BKbroiler's picture

it's not about legacy status, just quality control.  The early commenters were mostly financial pros, engineers, energy industry types and other people that actually knew what the fuck they were talking about.  You could spend an hour on this site and become much more informed and intelligent.  I didn't even become a member until 2 1/2 years ago because I didn't feel qualified to argue with most of them.  I sure as hell don't have that problem anymore, with these friggin morons posting...

blunderdog's picture

Well, media being what it is: dummies are good for page-views, even if all they do is shriek and fling poo.

shovelhead's picture

You say that as if flinging poo is a bad thing.


Poo Flingers SEIU Local #47.

"Look for the Union label."

francis_sawyer's picture

Look BK...

If you were around this weekend, there was a pretty nice Kyle Bass thread... He (& probably very few others ~ like, say Hugh Hendry) are about as good as it gets these days...

So, I'm REAL SORRY that all the [your distinction] 'more informed & intelligent' persons have flown the coop, but WTF do you want?...

There was a day that I, too, hung on practically every word that came out of the 'EXPERTS' mouths... Systematically ~ I realized that it was almost 100% LIES LIES LIES LIES LIES LIES...

So Tyler... Take BK's advice... He seems to be suggesting that the bullshit lies & voodoo chart porn be brought back... You know... for RATINGS sake (aka ~ so intellectuals like himself can be appropriately stimulted)...


francis_sawyer is just a run of the mill 'anti-semite' who makes too many comment links to pop culture... Ignore me at all costs...

BKbroiler's picture

I read the thread, and what was missing was the usual... someone who disagreed.  I personally think Tyler has done a great job of keeping the posts interesting, I'm strictly talking about the commenters.

Matt's picture

A bunch of people went off and made their own blogs, and alot of the counter-view people seem to have been chased off, unfortunately. Cyberbalkenization, I guess.

StychoKiller's picture

What?  But "this is the best of all possible worlds!" (Candide)

Contrary enough for ya?

Whalley World's picture

Hey, don't forget Robot Trader, the guys pic's of hot ladies was worth logging on for.

Northeaster's picture

"The early commenters were mostly financial pros, engineers, energy industry types and other people that actually knew what the fuck they were talking about.  You could spend an hour on this site and become much more informed and intelligent...don't have that problem anymore, with these friggin morons posting"


juliawong's picture

I was lurking at the inception (when it was still on blogspot?) for like 6 or maybe 9 months before signing up more than 3 years ago. It was really good in the first couple of years. Then over the last couple of years, weird trolls started to swarm the place.

slaughterer's picture

At this point, I miss some of the trolls like HarryWang, Robo-Trader, the Canadian dude with cancer, and the guy who was memorialized for saying "it takes $6 to dig silver out of the ground"

francis_sawyer's picture

'I miss' (this)... 'I miss' (that)...

Get a life people... Yeah ~ I miss that slutty looking chick back in high school that I most probably could have boned but was too chickenshit to ask... My life has no meaning anymore...

NewThor's picture

CHILL OUT, francis.

We love you as well.

nonclaim's picture

Apparently his only friend was at arms reach...

francis_sawyer's picture


LOL ~ Don't worry... I'm chilled...

The 'synthesis' to this thread deviation is as follows:

BK probably has a point... A couple of years back, there were more, what seemed to be, wily 'insiders' who were able to 'pull back the curtain' (which has a way of making some folks feel like they have a leg up on the competition ~ people LIKE to feel that way ~ it makes them feel special)...

Now ~ there seems to be less (in aggregate)... So THE FUCK what?...


Tyler's have a Bloomberg terminal... Which I have no doubt that they do their best each day to provide the most compelling narrative possible... It's NOT up to Tyler's to create the news, it's simply their job to report it (especially in a way that will NEVER be presented in the MSM)... In the process, (because ALL NEWS has become so farcical these days), I'd characterize it as having the propensity to draw out the most banal of human instincts & responses... That's just the way it is... You can't put chuck steak into a meat grinder and expect filet mignon to come out...

In other words...

It's NOT TYLERS FAULT that the financial world is a complete joke (ground chuck)... & if TYLERS can't grind out a 'Morton's' or 'Ruths Chris' 2 inch fillet out of the news... Well ~ maybe at least the chefs can come up with a clever & succulent burger out of the whole ordeal...