Stocks Slump On Boehner's "No Substantive Progress" Reality Check

Tyler Durden's picture




 

We are stunned... S&P 500 futures traded 1415 when Boehner began speaking. By the end of his first paragraph we had dropped 8 points and gone red for the day...and further...

  • *BOEHNER SAYS `THE WHITE HOUSE HAS TO GET SERIOUS'
  • *BOEHNER SAYS DEMOCRATS `COMFORTABLE' GOING OVER FISCAL CLIFF
  • *BOEHNER SAYS `NO SUBSTANTIVE PROGRESS' MADE IN TALKS
  • *BOEHNER SAYS DEMOCRATS RULING OUT `SENSIBLE SPENDING CUTS'
  • *BOEHNER SAYS DOESN'T KNOW WHAT WHITE HOUSE WILLING TO DO

It seems the algos are not amused...

 

 

It seems our tweet was replied to...

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Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:50 | 3020766 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

KA CHING

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:52 | 3020785 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

No progress, no surprise. I thought Boner looked a bit flaccid in that presser...

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:58 | 3020829 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

The  culture of entitlement in the US is too embedded in our societal DNA and anything less than draconian cuts to transfer payments and massive tax increases will not make a dent. Actuarially, the numbers just do not add up and the raison d'etre has to do with demographics and a lack of true political intestinal fortitude from the right and the left. The culmination of this budgetary farce will be another contrivance solely designed to kick the can down the road for another extended time period.  In essence, politicians from both sides of the aisle are simply delaying a decision in the hope that it will resolve itself or perhaps someone else will come along later to fix this untenable issue.

 

The truth of the matter is, that there is no solution and those who wield the reigns of  power in Washington and on Wall Street know it.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:07 | 3020856 PlausibleDenial
PlausibleDenial's picture

Correct, and this just in....  Sorry, could not link it.

BillTally Update

While Congress was taking its scheduled pre-election recesses, the past several issues of the Taxpayer's Tab have highlighted special topics such as the savings from repealing the Affordable Care Act, the popularity of legislation to rename buildings and landmarks, tax reform, and of course, the in-depth spending agenda analyses that NTUF conducted on certain Senate and Presidential candidates. Now that Members are back for the "lame duck" session, this issue of the Tab will return to examining the legislation that your elected officials have introduced recently.

But first, a snapshot of where our BillTally research stands and what Members have proposed so far. As of today, NTUF has researched or obtained cost estimates for 1,505 bills introduced since the start of the 112th Congress. Over 80 percent of these bills would increase spending.

Snapshot: Bill Introduction Rates and Number of Scored Bills in the 112th Congress through November 28, 2012   Scored Bills Bills to Increase Spending Bills to Decrease Spending Ratio of Increase Bills to Decrease Bills House of Representatives 921 746 175 4.3 Senate 584 489 95 5.1 Source: NTUF BillTally System

For each of the 175 bills in the House that would reduce spending, Members drafted over four to boost spending. The ratio of spending bills to cut bills in the Senate is over five to one.

These ratios are down compared to previous Congresses (for example, during the course of the entire 111th Congress the ratio was over 12:1 in the House and over 17:1 in the Senate).

On the other hand, the ratios are up slightly since the BillTally report on the First Session, which identified 3.8 increases per cut bill in the House and 4.4 in the Senate. It should be remembered, though, that the new ratios are based on a snapshot of the data and that NTUF will continue to track spending and savings proposals through the rest of the year.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:25 | 3020906 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Boehner is slumping,

Must is get pumping,

Suddenly stocks is dumping!

Quick, must is do something!

Boris is no more rhyme finding!

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 14:23 | 3021235 CPL
CPL's picture

Break it on down DJ!

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:05 | 3020864 Bay of Pigs
Bay of Pigs's picture

+1

Spot on.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:16 | 3020914 resurger
resurger's picture

+1

in the hope that it will resolve itself or perhaps someone else will come along later to fix this untenable issue

Ron Paul has left the building, only scavengers inept fucks is whats left ..

It will never be fixed .. All down from here.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 20:29 | 3021601 OneTinSoldier66
OneTinSoldier66's picture

Sure there's a solution...

 

Bernanke coming out every so often to say that ZIRP will be here for 2013, 2014, then 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021... and so on, and so forth.

 

Didn't everyone know yet that we just need more papering over of the problem? I will be coming out with a new soft drink shortly, ZIRP SLIRP, in order to rise to the occasion!

 

/sarc

 

But yes, you're right of course. There is no solution from Washington, D.C.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 14:10 | 3021191 Anasteus
Anasteus's picture

I like these spectacular ritual dances for the masses like 'pursuing a progress' or 'no progress achieved' when no one really knows what the words actually mean. For some it means dismissing the cliff as if it never existed, for others dismissing the cliff alike while pretending something should be fixed. Both parties keep on making fuss for the appreciative public audience while at the same time everything was already decided yonks ago. The fiscal cliff restrictions, or whatever it is, will be postponed ad infinitum and additional trillions may flood into government's and private bank's accounts. That will be announced as a triumphal agreement and a 'definitive solution of the fiscal cliff'.

But, at least, the market algos and the rest of few relentless human speculators can reap the harvest out of risk-on and risk-off phases of this three-act play.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020786 vast-dom
vast-dom's picture

the pump up so no ka ching fool. just buy and hold deez nutz while i flip a coin and get my chimps throwing darts.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:13 | 3020895 fuu
fuu's picture

Hit an 18, 19, and trip-20.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:56 | 3020809 The trend is yo...
The trend is your friend's picture

market will be right where it was in about 30 minutes

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:59 | 3020835 vast-dom
vast-dom's picture

i am stating the painfully obvious: GAME PONZI PLANET at this stage still reacting to this utter bs means we are all fucking stupid for bothering to track any of this, even if for dark comedic diversion purposes.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:11 | 3020880 resurger
resurger's picture

According to PONZI PLANET the S&P Must hold the "CRITICAL"..

Chose the right Answer:

A : The Critical 1,400

B : The Critical 1,400

C : The Critical 1,400

D : The Critical 1,400

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:15 | 3020905 CPL
CPL's picture

E :  All of the above.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:17 | 3020920 spastic_colon
spastic_colon's picture

just watch the eur/usd manipulation and ctrl/p for your answers

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:58 | 3020828 CPL
CPL's picture

Good news everyone!

 

It's Bullish!...just look at it.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:50 | 3020770 asteroids
asteroids's picture

Shades of 2008.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:08 | 3020874 HappyCamper
HappyCamper's picture

But, but, but... I backed up the truck with SPY calls betting on a Santa Clause rally! 

It's not fair!

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:51 | 3020778 surf0766
surf0766's picture

"BOEHNER SAYS DOESN'T KNOW WHAT WHITE HOUSE WILLING TO DO"

 

answer >  nothing

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020797 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

they are willing to make you look like an asswipe. Mission accomplished

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:57 | 3020821 surf0766
surf0766's picture

.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:58 | 3020831 drchris
drchris's picture

Wait, are you saing that compromise isn't when one side gets everything they want and the other side gets nothing?

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:52 | 3020780 inevitablecollapse
inevitablecollapse's picture

i wish i could type out that sound that they play in cartoons when a submarine dives - aoooooooga, aoooooooga, dive, dive!  if anyone anticipated an 'all is rosy' outlook from the talking boehner, they were obviously let down

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:52 | 3020782 Orly
Orly's picture

He is not a happy camper.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:15 | 3020851 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

 I achieved "break even" Orly/  Now it's just "head lines"... Draghi Style/ all form no function!

           Now I can go over to my EBS account and chew my toe nails off/

 

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:01 | 3020787 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Whisper rumor that Obamney's teleprompter is being warmed up.

They're going to throw some algobot machine language tempting buzzwords out from the POTUS podium for some quick & nasty, hot HFT uptick love.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:03 | 3020849 resurger
resurger's picture

Get ready for Algo driven melt up in 5,4,3,2,1 ..

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:53 | 3020790 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

Ozero knows the thing is held together with string and scotch tape. He figures he can make the rethuglicans the fall guys. Good strategy. Personally, I think we crossed the point of no return long ago. Let 'er roll

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:27 | 3020977 chubbar
chubbar's picture

Exactly! Knowing that we are past the point of no return, the rethugs should trot out Boner to proclaim that they will step aside and announce that they will "allow Obummer to drive the economy into the ground with their outrageous tax and spend policies". Then they should just vote present and allow the Demos to tax the shit out of everything under the sun while cutting no spending. This would just put the economy into a steeper dive than it already is and get the collapse going sooner. Not that I want either of those two parties to survive but I just don't understand why the rethugs don't realize the MSM is going to portray them as the problem either way it goes? The class warfare has caught on and the public is fully on board. Anything short of rethugs agreeing to confiscating the net worth of folks who earn over 500K is just going to make the rethugs look like they are defending the rich guys, which they are of course. That manuever would completely undercut the whole discussion and while it'd be a short term loss for that party, the Demons would be run out of dodge after the collapse, unfortunately for the rest of us it still leaves rethugs in existence.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 19:33 | 3022258 neidermeyer
neidermeyer's picture

I can get on board with that ,, maybe Boehner should just rent a cruise ship and take all the (R)'s out for a last hurrah around the caribbean with a free hooker in each stateroom,, give Obama EVERYTHING ... I'm tired of waiting out this slow motion train wreck , lets get it over so we can rebuild.... Where's Cuffy Meigs when you need him?

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:53 | 3020791 Debtless
Debtless's picture

Crybaby. Bitch.

 

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:55 | 3020794 foodstampbarry
foodstampbarry's picture

Never let a crisis go to waste

riots, mayhem , martial law...

 

Obama inserted as ruler for life...fundemental change accomplished.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:58 | 3020819 Everybodys All ...
Everybodys All American's picture

It's trans-formative. Doesn't that make you feel better.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020795 caimen garou
caimen garou's picture

Time to get off the tit and get to work, no time off,no going to the bar after work and they all should get  a pay cut to reflect the work they have done = 0

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020796 HyperLazy
HyperLazy's picture

Relax, its part of the infinite circus - just BTFD and STFR.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020798 BlueCollaredOne
BlueCollaredOne's picture

I fucking hate all politicians

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 16:27 | 3021729 falak pema
falak pema's picture

that sounds very freudian...

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020799 The trend is yo...
The trend is your friend's picture

Politicians truely have a gift, they can stand in front of a crowd for several minutes speaking and say nothing

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 14:02 | 3021144 RopeADope
RopeADope's picture

Politicians truely have a gift, they can stand in front of a crowd for several minutes telling them they will rape their children and the people will applaud.

Fri, 11/30/2012 - 11:43 | 3023689 Silver Bully
Silver Bully's picture

'...and the people will applaud.'

It makes sense when you think about it. Politicians love to kiss babies and talk about how they do what they do 'for the children.' It isn't rape if the parents give their blessing, right?

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:55 | 3020800 algol_dog
algol_dog's picture

Go over the cliff. Best thing that could happen ....

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020803 algol_dog
algol_dog's picture

Go over the cliff. Best thing that could happen ....

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020805 nobusiness
nobusiness's picture

Russel 2000 in a world of its own?  I guess because housing is "fixed" and the fiscal bullshit doesn't matter?

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:55 | 3020806 Napoleon
Napoleon's picture

Who's better at distorting reality...algos or pisani?

 

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:55 | 3020807 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

Boner looks like he sleeps with a bottle of Jack

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:13 | 3020900 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

Boner looks like he sleeps in a vat of leather dye.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:56 | 3020808 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

 This shit " Not Tyler" This diatribe belongs in some stupid Quentin Tarantino [zombie flick]! Bitchez/

  Poor Tyler must be laughing his ass off, over this dis_information!  Thank GOD for zero/hedge!

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:56 | 3020812 TopGunTraitor
TopGunTraitor's picture

Glad I bought QID. Everyone in Congress is a bunch of turds.

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