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Stocks Slump On Boehner's "No Substantive Progress" Reality Check

Tyler Durden's picture


We are stunned... S&P 500 futures traded 1415 when Boehner began speaking. By the end of his first paragraph we had dropped 8 points and gone red for the day...and further...


It seems the algos are not amused...



It seems our tweet was replied to...


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Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:50 | 3020766 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture


Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:52 | 3020785 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

No progress, no surprise. I thought Boner looked a bit flaccid in that presser...

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:58 | 3020829 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

The  culture of entitlement in the US is too embedded in our societal DNA and anything less than draconian cuts to transfer payments and massive tax increases will not make a dent. Actuarially, the numbers just do not add up and the raison d'etre has to do with demographics and a lack of true political intestinal fortitude from the right and the left. The culmination of this budgetary farce will be another contrivance solely designed to kick the can down the road for another extended time period.  In essence, politicians from both sides of the aisle are simply delaying a decision in the hope that it will resolve itself or perhaps someone else will come along later to fix this untenable issue.


The truth of the matter is, that there is no solution and those who wield the reigns of  power in Washington and on Wall Street know it.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:07 | 3020856 PlausibleDenial
PlausibleDenial's picture

Correct, and this just in....  Sorry, could not link it.

BillTally Update

While Congress was taking its scheduled pre-election recesses, the past several issues of the Taxpayer's Tab have highlighted special topics such as the savings from repealing the Affordable Care Act, the popularity of legislation to rename buildings and landmarks, tax reform, and of course, the in-depth spending agenda analyses that NTUF conducted on certain Senate and Presidential candidates. Now that Members are back for the "lame duck" session, this issue of the Tab will return to examining the legislation that your elected officials have introduced recently.

But first, a snapshot of where our BillTally research stands and what Members have proposed so far. As of today, NTUF has researched or obtained cost estimates for 1,505 bills introduced since the start of the 112th Congress. Over 80 percent of these bills would increase spending.

Snapshot: Bill Introduction Rates and Number of Scored Bills in the 112th Congress through November 28, 2012   Scored Bills Bills to Increase Spending Bills to Decrease Spending Ratio of Increase Bills to Decrease Bills House of Representatives 921 746 175 4.3 Senate 584 489 95 5.1 Source: NTUF BillTally System

For each of the 175 bills in the House that would reduce spending, Members drafted over four to boost spending. The ratio of spending bills to cut bills in the Senate is over five to one.

These ratios are down compared to previous Congresses (for example, during the course of the entire 111th Congress the ratio was over 12:1 in the House and over 17:1 in the Senate).

On the other hand, the ratios are up slightly since the BillTally report on the First Session, which identified 3.8 increases per cut bill in the House and 4.4 in the Senate. It should be remembered, though, that the new ratios are based on a snapshot of the data and that NTUF will continue to track spending and savings proposals through the rest of the year.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:25 | 3020906 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Boehner is slumping,

Must is get pumping,

Suddenly stocks is dumping!

Quick, must is do something!

Boris is no more rhyme finding!

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 14:23 | 3021235 CPL
CPL's picture

Break it on down DJ!

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:05 | 3020864 Bay of Pigs
Bay of Pigs's picture


Spot on.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:16 | 3020914 resurger
resurger's picture


in the hope that it will resolve itself or perhaps someone else will come along later to fix this untenable issue

Ron Paul has left the building, only scavengers inept fucks is whats left ..

It will never be fixed .. All down from here.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 20:29 | 3021601 OneTinSoldier66
OneTinSoldier66's picture

Sure there's a solution...


Bernanke coming out every so often to say that ZIRP will be here for 2013, 2014, then 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021... and so on, and so forth.


Didn't everyone know yet that we just need more papering over of the problem? I will be coming out with a new soft drink shortly, ZIRP SLIRP, in order to rise to the occasion!




But yes, you're right of course. There is no solution from Washington, D.C.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 14:10 | 3021191 Anasteus
Anasteus's picture

I like these spectacular ritual dances for the masses like 'pursuing a progress' or 'no progress achieved' when no one really knows what the words actually mean. For some it means dismissing the cliff as if it never existed, for others dismissing the cliff alike while pretending something should be fixed. Both parties keep on making fuss for the appreciative public audience while at the same time everything was already decided yonks ago. The fiscal cliff restrictions, or whatever it is, will be postponed ad infinitum and additional trillions may flood into government's and private bank's accounts. That will be announced as a triumphal agreement and a 'definitive solution of the fiscal cliff'.

But, at least, the market algos and the rest of few relentless human speculators can reap the harvest out of risk-on and risk-off phases of this three-act play.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020786 vast-dom
vast-dom's picture

the pump up so no ka ching fool. just buy and hold deez nutz while i flip a coin and get my chimps throwing darts.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:13 | 3020895 fuu
fuu's picture

Hit an 18, 19, and trip-20.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:56 | 3020809 The trend is yo...
The trend is your friend's picture

market will be right where it was in about 30 minutes

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:59 | 3020835 vast-dom
vast-dom's picture

i am stating the painfully obvious: GAME PONZI PLANET at this stage still reacting to this utter bs means we are all fucking stupid for bothering to track any of this, even if for dark comedic diversion purposes.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:11 | 3020880 resurger
resurger's picture

According to PONZI PLANET the S&P Must hold the "CRITICAL"..

Chose the right Answer:

A : The Critical 1,400

B : The Critical 1,400

C : The Critical 1,400

D : The Critical 1,400

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:15 | 3020905 CPL
CPL's picture

E :  All of the above.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:17 | 3020920 spastic_colon
spastic_colon's picture

just watch the eur/usd manipulation and ctrl/p for your answers

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:58 | 3020828 CPL
CPL's picture

Good news everyone!


It's Bullish!...just look at it.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:50 | 3020770 asteroids
asteroids's picture

Shades of 2008.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:08 | 3020874 HappyCamper
HappyCamper's picture

But, but, but... I backed up the truck with SPY calls betting on a Santa Clause rally! 

It's not fair!

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:51 | 3020778 surf0766
surf0766's picture



answer >  nothing

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020797 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

they are willing to make you look like an asswipe. Mission accomplished

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:57 | 3020821 surf0766
surf0766's picture


Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:58 | 3020831 drchris
drchris's picture

Wait, are you saing that compromise isn't when one side gets everything they want and the other side gets nothing?

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:52 | 3020780 inevitablecollapse
inevitablecollapse's picture

i wish i could type out that sound that they play in cartoons when a submarine dives - aoooooooga, aoooooooga, dive, dive!  if anyone anticipated an 'all is rosy' outlook from the talking boehner, they were obviously let down

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:52 | 3020782 Orly
Orly's picture

He is not a happy camper.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:15 | 3020851 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

 I achieved "break even" Orly/  Now it's just "head lines"... Draghi Style/ all form no function!

           Now I can go over to my EBS account and chew my toe nails off/


Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:01 | 3020787 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Whisper rumor that Obamney's teleprompter is being warmed up.

They're going to throw some algobot machine language tempting buzzwords out from the POTUS podium for some quick & nasty, hot HFT uptick love.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:03 | 3020849 resurger
resurger's picture

Get ready for Algo driven melt up in 5,4,3,2,1 ..

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:53 | 3020790 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

Ozero knows the thing is held together with string and scotch tape. He figures he can make the rethuglicans the fall guys. Good strategy. Personally, I think we crossed the point of no return long ago. Let 'er roll

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:27 | 3020977 chubbar
chubbar's picture

Exactly! Knowing that we are past the point of no return, the rethugs should trot out Boner to proclaim that they will step aside and announce that they will "allow Obummer to drive the economy into the ground with their outrageous tax and spend policies". Then they should just vote present and allow the Demos to tax the shit out of everything under the sun while cutting no spending. This would just put the economy into a steeper dive than it already is and get the collapse going sooner. Not that I want either of those two parties to survive but I just don't understand why the rethugs don't realize the MSM is going to portray them as the problem either way it goes? The class warfare has caught on and the public is fully on board. Anything short of rethugs agreeing to confiscating the net worth of folks who earn over 500K is just going to make the rethugs look like they are defending the rich guys, which they are of course. That manuever would completely undercut the whole discussion and while it'd be a short term loss for that party, the Demons would be run out of dodge after the collapse, unfortunately for the rest of us it still leaves rethugs in existence.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 19:33 | 3022258 neidermeyer
neidermeyer's picture

I can get on board with that ,, maybe Boehner should just rent a cruise ship and take all the (R)'s out for a last hurrah around the caribbean with a free hooker in each stateroom,, give Obama EVERYTHING ... I'm tired of waiting out this slow motion train wreck , lets get it over so we can rebuild.... Where's Cuffy Meigs when you need him?

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:53 | 3020791 Debtless
Debtless's picture

Crybaby. Bitch.


Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:55 | 3020794 foodstampbarry
foodstampbarry's picture

Never let a crisis go to waste

riots, mayhem , martial law...


Obama inserted as ruler for life...fundemental change accomplished.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:58 | 3020819 Everybodys All ...
Everybodys All American's picture

It's trans-formative. Doesn't that make you feel better.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020795 caimen garou
caimen garou's picture

Time to get off the tit and get to work, no time off,no going to the bar after work and they all should get  a pay cut to reflect the work they have done = 0

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020796 HyperLazy
HyperLazy's picture

Relax, its part of the infinite circus - just BTFD and STFR.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020798 BlueCollaredOne
BlueCollaredOne's picture

I fucking hate all politicians

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 16:27 | 3021729 falak pema
falak pema's picture

that sounds very freudian...

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020799 The trend is yo...
The trend is your friend's picture

Politicians truely have a gift, they can stand in front of a crowd for several minutes speaking and say nothing

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 14:02 | 3021144 RopeADope
RopeADope's picture

Politicians truely have a gift, they can stand in front of a crowd for several minutes telling them they will rape their children and the people will applaud.

Fri, 11/30/2012 - 11:43 | 3023689 Silver Bully
Silver Bully's picture

'...and the people will applaud.'

It makes sense when you think about it. Politicians love to kiss babies and talk about how they do what they do 'for the children.' It isn't rape if the parents give their blessing, right?

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:55 | 3020800 algol_dog
algol_dog's picture

Go over the cliff. Best thing that could happen ....

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020803 algol_dog
algol_dog's picture

Go over the cliff. Best thing that could happen ....

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:54 | 3020805 nobusiness
nobusiness's picture

Russel 2000 in a world of its own?  I guess because housing is "fixed" and the fiscal bullshit doesn't matter?

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:55 | 3020806 Napoleon
Napoleon's picture

Who's better at distorting reality...algos or pisani?


Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:55 | 3020807 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

Boner looks like he sleeps with a bottle of Jack

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:13 | 3020900 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

Boner looks like he sleeps in a vat of leather dye.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:56 | 3020808 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

 This shit " Not Tyler" This diatribe belongs in some stupid Quentin Tarantino [zombie flick]! Bitchez/

  Poor Tyler must be laughing his ass off, over this dis_information!  Thank GOD for zero/hedge!

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:56 | 3020812 TopGunTraitor
TopGunTraitor's picture

Glad I bought QID. Everyone in Congress is a bunch of turds.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:57 | 3020814 tooriskytoinvest
tooriskytoinvest's picture

Warren Buffet Warns That The D-Day Is Here And Fed Has No More Bullets Left To Stimulate Us Economy. We’ve Kicked It Down The Road For A Long Time; Millions of Taxpayers Is Heading Into An ‘AMT Shock’

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:31 | 3020855 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Warren "Fuck The Taxpayers, Let's Get A HUGE Bailout, amIright Charlie Munger?" Buffet

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:58 | 3020815 tickhound
tickhound's picture

Headline should read... Stocks Slump on "No Substantive Progress" Talking Points

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:00 | 3020840 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Stocks 'slump' to comfortably green.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:08 | 3020871 tickhound
tickhound's picture

* breaking... Senator Reid about to apply magic market talk

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:12 | 3020891 optimator
optimator's picture

Do Reid and bohner have the same broker with advance scripts?

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:27 | 3020980 gjp
gjp's picture

No kidding.  The only surprising thing will be if the market ever goes down by more than 20% again.  I won't hold my breath.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:57 | 3020818 LongSoupLine
LongSoupLine's picture

fucking bullshit!  SPX still green!


if he said something good, it would be up 3 fucking %!



fuck you HFT fucking dickwads!

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:01 | 3020842 Zer0head
Zer0head's picture

in time, in time  late day Dec 24th

the call options  hung by the chimmney with care

in knowledge that the cliff would no longer be there

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:14 | 3020898 CPL
CPL's picture

Just round up a posse and spam the shit out of twitter and yahoo financial groups with bullshit bad news.  Add correction to the posts as well.  They seem to react to that.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:58 | 3020825 scatterbrains
scatterbrains's picture

gold said kiss my ass niggas.. never bough the hype although interesting now that it isn't selling off either... yet.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:59 | 3020838 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

Listen to John William's latest interview on future money trends.  He is saying hyperinflation starts before midterms.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:01 | 3020846 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Why should I listen to him, none of these people have been right about jack shit. They'll do what they want, when they feel like it, thats all. 'Mid terms' my ass.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:12 | 3020893 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

Avoiding a giant assraping seems like a good reason.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:58 | 3020827 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

They have to drag this horseshit out until Dec 21.  Why would anyone expect anyone to admit the deal is already done now?  They don't have any choices.  They will raise the debt limit, spend more, and not raise taxes.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:30 | 3020994 gjp
gjp's picture

yes, that is exactly what they will do and the market has already disepensed with the drama.  Off and to the races on the prospect of unlmited funny money courtesy of Uncle Ben.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:58 | 3020832 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Wait...why does Boner even matter? Obama and dems rule. See they fucked up...they should have manipulated it so at least there would be an illusion of power strugle.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:59 | 3020836 monopoly
monopoly's picture

What a freaking circus. 

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 12:59 | 3020839 Crtrvlt
Crtrvlt's picture

Boehner- is military spending , almost half of all spending, on the table for spending cuts......

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:17 | 3020919 RopeADope
RopeADope's picture

But the politicians have to keep our Armed Forces out of the country which costs money. There is nothing more dangerous to them than armed men and women that are trained in force projection and still retain American values.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:24 | 3020967 docj
docj's picture

You do realize it's nothing even remotely close to half of all gov't spending, right?

Not saying that it couldn't, or shouldn't, be cut. (It could, and should.) But if you don't address Medicare you can cut the DOD almost to zero and HHS will absorb it all within about 10-years.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:37 | 3021024 chubbar
chubbar's picture

Perhaps he meant more than half of discretionary spending?

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:40 | 3021035 docj
docj's picture

Which is like - what? - about 1/3 of all spending?

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 14:17 | 3021211 chubbar
chubbar's picture

I believe that is pretty accurate. Of course discretionary spending is 100% of what the politicians claim they can cut, which was probably his point.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:00 | 3020841 piceridu
piceridu's picture

How did that empty suit rise to become Speaker? Ok, I already answered my own question.

We live in a country where the National philosophy is Infantilism.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:06 | 3020852 stormsailor
stormsailor's picture

mentally line that question up with the realization that the prior speaker was nancy pelosi


i've had sweat socks that were more intelligent

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:01 | 3020844 Intelligence_In...
Intelligence_Insulter's picture

Out of control spending needs to be addressed, the coming fiscal cliff is serious.  The idealogical differences in the 2 parties is blatently clear.  Obama wants to continue socialism, obamaphones, and EBT cards, and the GOP want to tighten their belts, and let the private sector take this economy to new heights.


Cut social programs and start selling off government infrastructure, it's the only way this country is going to get back on track.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:03 | 3020853 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

Or, make more social programs to back up the ones we cannot pay for, and create more government owned infrastructure.  You don't solve big impossible problems in politics.  You make them bigger.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:11 | 3020889 forwardho
forwardho's picture

There, you just inserted reality into his post.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:04 | 3020854 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

'Idological differences'....'Obama wants'....'GOP wants'....its all just a BS puppet show controlled from behind the curtain.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:26 | 3020976 HurricaneSeason
HurricaneSeason's picture

Clinton already ended welfare as we knew it. He gave them all jobs working for the government and answereing the phone for $50,000 to $100,000 a year. Bush added on with TSA. That's where the cuts will come, whether the U.S. makes them or China does. When the jobs all go overseas, the affirmative action janitors and firmen can't be making $100,000 a year, nor can the federal workers. They debated whether to make 50,000 TSA workers minimum wage private contractors or unlimitedly funded government workers. They made the wrong choice, the right choice would be to eliminate them altogether. Cutting someones $15 a month in food stamps will do nothing compared to some of the governments ridiculous wages and jobs.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:03 | 3020847 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

Posturing, building the drama, creating a crisis so our taxes can be raised and already taxed entitlements cut.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:05 | 3020857 stormsailor
stormsailor's picture

until i see some dead bankers. this is all a lot of blather

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:05 | 3020861 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

No politician puppet has any standing to say 'we cant pay for something' ever again when its no problem to shovel trillions into TBTF banks vaults. All bullshit 100%.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:05 | 3020862 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

Obama is making Boner look bad with the gov algos.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:10 | 3020879 SmoothCoolSmoke
SmoothCoolSmoke's picture

Boner says "looks good" - SP up 15

Boner says "looks bad" - SP down 8



Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:10 | 3020883 alangreedspank
alangreedspank's picture

The only bad thing about the "cliff" is the tax increases. Otherwise, spending cuts are fine and will only show how much the economy is a centrally controlled basket case.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:11 | 3020886 russwinter
russwinter's picture

Incidentally we are only $74 bn from breaching the debt ceiling.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:12 | 3020888 alangreedspank
alangreedspank's picture

"Hi, the name is Cliff. Fiscal Cliff".

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:17 | 3020922 SmoothCoolSmoke
SmoothCoolSmoke's picture

SP back to 1415.  Hmmmmmm, seems BTFD is back in spades.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:18 | 3020927 Squid Vicious
Squid Vicious's picture

even boner's flaccid presser results in a mini-squeeze...un fuckin real

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:19 | 3020938 Gimp
Gimp's picture

And the next four years will be.....just like the last four - SURPRISE M*****F*****S!

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:22 | 3020958 RopeADope
RopeADope's picture

I think you meant to say like the last 32 years.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:22 | 3020957 digalert
digalert's picture

ShadowStats John Williams says,

"this president, this congress will see hyperinflation"


Thu, 11/29/2012 - 14:55 | 3021401 blunderdog
blunderdog's picture

Yeah, BUT...

1) he says that every year

  ~and, far more important~

2) he's a fat fuck, so there's no reason to listen to anything he says

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 13:35 | 3021012 LukeWorm
LukeWorm's picture


I like that expression :-) 

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 14:48 | 3021364 JLee2027
JLee2027's picture

No worries. Boehner will cave again, at the last minute. I see huge tax increases ahead.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 15:10 | 3021456 JohnFrodo
JohnFrodo's picture

There should be a mortorium on fiscal cliff untill the last two days, its like a basketball game, the last two minutes are all that matter.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 15:26 | 3021503 skunzie
skunzie's picture

From all the headlines you posted, ol' Weepyboy Boehner is nice and ready to cave in and raise taxes on us all.

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 16:41 | 3021775 jplotinus
jplotinus's picture

So what if stocks drop because tax increases are imminent?
Tax increases are needed if the US debt level is to be reduced and annual deficit reduced. Duh...

Alternately on ZH there are usually one or more threads or charts or both lamenting and lambasting annual $trillion budget deficits. Next to those threads, other charts and threads jump up and down on why, exactly, any tax increase at all will mean the death of private sector job creation, nevermind that in the last 3 decades of ever lower taxation, the outcome for jobs has been that of outsourcing of the entire manufacturing segment and much of the service sector of the economy.

Low taxes d-int create a damn thing except wealth disparity and huge deficits.

Look, bitchez, you can't have it both ways. Taxes are too low and need to be raised. It is as simple as that.

Deal with it

Thu, 11/29/2012 - 16:56 | 3021829 Lewshine
Lewshine's picture

DEAL DEAL DEAL...Dow rises 1000 points in an hour. Details: All investment vehicles capital gains 42% tax, Inheritance/Death tax 50%, Mortgage interest is now non-deductable, Employed and small business making more than $251,000 are taxed at 44% on income - DOW drops 25 points...But ramps another 1000 in last 10 minutes of trading.

It won't matter what they conclude except a lot of people will pay a hell of a lot more for what the Fed encouraged, and what the bankers got away with!!

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