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Guest Post: Preppers Who Make Surviving The Apocalypse Even Less Fun

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Submitted by Brandon Smith from Alt-Market

Preppers Who Make Surviving The Apocalypse Even Less Fun

Being forced to endure and survive a catastrophic macro event like a monetary or social collapse is perhaps one of the worst experiences I could imagine.  Such a crisis leads to just about every crime and inhuman action in existence, and, the time required for a culture to right itself and rebuild is severely protracted.  A hurricane or earthquake or tidal wave; these calamities are short lived and easy in comparison.  The point is, as survivalists who are preparing to make an economic end-game scenario as “comfortable” to live through as we can, it is incumbent upon us to consider the kind of company we keep during the gambit.  Some allies will make that mad world bearable; others will bring the madness to your doorstep.

Many preppers are aware of the dangers inherent in our progressively deteriorating nation.  Unfortunately, some of them are completely unaware of the dangers inherent within themselves.  Building a solid community of people to rely on during a collapse is absolutely essential, and the larger the group of liberty minded neighbors the better.  But, if certain ground rules are not established from the very beginning, a rainbow of personal issues and character flaws could very well destroy years of effort.  Care must be taken by all parties involved to ensure that internal conflicts remain at a minimum, and when they do arise, that each person is wise enough to resolve issues in an adult manner.

I hate to say it, but you will inevitably run into some folks that are beyond compromise and beyond hope.  Working with them is like pulling teeth…shark’s teeth…from your jugular.  Here are just a handful of powder keg personalities that will make the apocalypse more than a living hell for you and your friends if they manage to latch onto or take leadership in your survival watch…

1) The Self Assumed “Leader”

The “Assumed Leader” is not actually a reliable or practical leader; he just thinks he is, and reminds everyone loudly whenever he can find occasion.  He does not generally do this by screaming “I AM YOUR LEADER!”  Instead, he attempts to micro-manage every aspect of the survival group and shows early signs of control issues.  The Assumed Leader will first make forceful suggestions to test the waters, scoffing angrily whenever people do not strictly follow his advice.  If he gains traction, his suggestions turn into orders, and he begins to act as though he is somehow in a superior position to the rest of the community. 

He seems to have an answer to every question or concern, which would be nice if he actually knew what he as talking about half of the time.  Usually, this is not the case.  He may have expertise in a certain field, like farming, or building, or engineering, or even defense, and this is indeed valuable.  However, his mastery of one area of knowledge has inflated his ego to massive proportions and he now pretends as if he is some kind of hyper-educated elitist potentate.  When approached with alternative options and methods, he will respond with ridicule as if you have no clue what you are talking about.  When his ideas are criticized, he will react with fury, and try to remove dissenters from the community entirely. 

The best way to avoid these people is to discover them early in your prepping project, and to make certain that NO ONE becomes a De facto dictator.  Every person with particular expertise within the community should be given respect in that specific field, but not given authority over all decisions.  The experienced farmer should offer leadership when it comes to farming, but step aside when it comes to defense and defenders, and vice versa.  It is best to keep in mind that the most effective leaders always ask those around them for aid and advice before coming to any conclusion.  The worst leaders already assume they know everything.

2) The Feudal Lord

The Feudal Lord is an Assumed Leader who has managed to lure other preppers into a Commune, rather than a Community, and there is a considerable difference.  He is often a well-off survivalist who has suddenly realized that for all his money and land and supplies, he is basically defenseless, and needs an organized group to protect his bounty.  He entices other preppers into the fold with ideas that he is building a legitimate and fair community, and with land already available, many take interest.  The problem is, the Feudal Lord believes possession of the land that the group is defending automatically makes him Grand Poobah, and that those people are not equals, but servants and serfs.

I have found that Feudal Lords also have a tendency to charge people "fees" for the right to join their communes.  They will argue that this is designed to "vet" candidates and see if they are truly "serious" about survival prepping.  In the dark corner of their minds, however, they actually believe that they are OWED a tithe from anyone who wishes to earn the "privilege" of becoming a permanent installment on their property.  From the very beginning they go into the project with almost no sincere regard for the people they are working with.     

The reality is, the Feudal Lord’s land and supplies are utterly meaningless without security and without aid.  His survival riches can be taken in an instant by a mere handful of looters, or even one experienced raider.  Without other people, treated as equals in survival and ready to lay down their lives to protect each other and him, he has nothing, and is foolhardy to think otherwise.

This is not to say that all landowners who try to centralize a group on their property are seeking to become mini-kings of a mini-kingdom.  If rules and agreements are made early on, and everyone understands their role, then such an arrangement could work.  But, if the landowner purposely avoids set agreements, appoints roles to people without asking them, changes the plan regularly to suit himself, and tries to leech money out of participants, then it’s time to walk away now before it is too late.  Eventually he WILL use his position as landowner as a means to dominate, and will threaten to cast people out who disagree with his methods.

The best way to avoid these characters and the commune situation altogether is to not centralize on a single piece of land, but to organize in a neighborhood fashion, where everyone maintains sovereign control of what they do and all aid is voluntary.

3) The Moral Relativist

There is, sadly, a small subsection of survivalists out there who do not plan to live off their own preps; they plan to confiscate the preps of others by force and solve every problem at the barrel of a gun.  In their mind, a crisis situation calls for the abandonment of conscience and the application of a “survival of the fittest” mentality.  They believe that morals are all well and good when civilized society remains, but a source of weakness during catastrophe.  Their philosophy is: Only the strongest of men will be able to set aside principle and “do what needs to be done”.  That is to say, they believe you must become the monster to defeat the monster.

In fact, only men who are able to hold onto their principles during the worst moments are strong.  Weak men run away from conscience, using the excuse that times are “different and difficult”.  They are not survivalists, they are terrorists in every sense, and they will only hurt our ultimate goal of rebuilding a free, prosperous, and individualistic society.

These people should be avoided like the plague.  They will make enemies wherever they go, ask you to do highly questionable things, and push your community into annihilation.  Eventually, somebody is going to put them out of their misery, and it’s best to not be around when that happens.

4) The Obsessive

The Obsessive is a person whose drive is initially impressive but also ultimately destructive.  His entire life revolves around survival prepping and impending doom.  Certainly, it is better to be extra concerned about the economic crisis on the horizon than to be utterly oblivious.  A smart man over-prepares.  But, there is such a thing as overkill, even in the world of survivalism. 

No one can ever do enough fast enough in this person’s eyes.  He will whine constantly about how he is the only one taking preparations seriously, and how everyone else is a lazy bum.  He will become frantic on a daily basis, admonishing the group or community on their lack of urgency.  In a leadership position, this person is a nightmare, creating constant waves of tension and panic, instead of calmly offering solutions or constructive criticism.

Obsessives are generally unimaginative people with little talent or intelligence who use their prepping lifestyle as their only means to feel superior to others.  They tend to become legends in their own minds, dreaming of the day when everyone will desperately cling to them and their remedial survival know-how.  They fantasize about all the people who "wouldn't take their advice" (usually smug advice), crawling in squalor begging them for help one day.

The Obsessive’s motto is:  “Let me tell you why you are wrong and how you are lazy!”  Instead of: “How can I help you fix this?” 

We all need a break once in a while from the horrors we know are waiting for us.  To step back and enjoy what we can of a beautiful day or good friends is not the same as being a freeloader or a backslider within your prepper group.  Survival is about more than sustaining the body.  It is about more than chopping wood, stockpiling ammo, and slaving over a piece of land from sun up until sundown like a mindless drone just to get by; it is also about sustaining the heart and the mind.  Otherwise, what is the point of living?   

5) The Ulterior Motive Drama Queen

The Drama Queen is a man or woman who is loosely interested in survivalism, but wants to join your community for other reasons, and these reasons may cause many members dismay.  The opposite of The Obsessive, you’ll notice a strange non-involvement on their part or lack of interest as far as participating in survival discussions and decision making.  They will often hand over all their survival preparation plans to another person or persons, while hovering like a gnat around the community searching for that special something.

They may be looking for friends and social recognition.  They may be afraid of collapse and simply trying to lock into ANY group regardless of whether they fit, becoming disenchanted later.  They may enjoy the excitement of feeling like they are involved, and are living vicariously through the accomplishments of others.  They may just be looking for a date.  Ultimately, their primary objective is not to build a working community, but to get something out of the community beyond safety. 

If they do not get what they want, they raise hell, using whatever excuse happens to be handy without ever admitting their real motivations.  They will deliberately start unnecessary drama, attempt to create divisions, focus on one person as the cause of all their troubles, or blame the whole group for the heartache in their life.  They will attempt to draw everyone into their personal soap opera in the hopes of becoming the focal point, sharing strange and extremely private issues with anyone who accidentally offers to listen.

Eventually, they will be seen for what they are and will lose the ear of the other preppers, who obviously have better things to worry about, but not after wreaking some havoc in the process.

6) The Zealot

The Zealot has a perfect picture in his mind of how his survival community is going to look.  Absolutely perfect.  The problem is, all people are imperfect and all have different conceptions of life, and this disturbs and disrupts the Zealot’s fantasy.  It is one thing to be careful in whom you associate with when assembling a prepper organization, but it is entirely another to hold everyone to insane standards that even you cannot meet.   

The Zealot usually wants to be in charge so that he can vet and control each member of the group, but this is not always the case.  Zealots are also sometimes highly anti-social, showing interest in a group for a short time and then suddenly walking away as if no one is up to par.  He may base his zealotry on a misplaced religious fervor or philosophical inflexibility, but he will not be happy until everyone sees the world the way he does, or until they meet his grandiose brand of moral flawlessness.  For him, it is not enough that the community around him shares a love for liberty and a disdain for tyranny, they must also be “spiritually pure” in his eyes. 

One mistake or disagreement by a member of the group earns them a black mark on the Zealot’s list which he never forgets.  From then on, that member is the enemy, and the Zealot will engineer conflict after conflict until the person gives up and goes away, or until he can convince the group that person is more trouble than they are worth.

The great dilemma for any survivalist is to balance personal freedom and a peaceful home life with the reality that they will not last long without relying on a group.  Other people bring talent, friendship, and safety to our lives, but they also bring baggage.  The key is to work with those who know how to manage as much of their own baggage as possible, who are aware of themselves and are willing to police their own quirks, and who have not swan dived off a cliff into extreme disturbia.  No survival community can withstand the savage assault of national collapse otherwise.


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Fri, 12/07/2012 - 19:45 | 3044335 Aurora Ex Machina
Aurora Ex Machina's picture

Problems in Safe Haven, Kalispell?

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 20:27 | 3044444 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

talk to some boat people, illegal aliens, amazon tribes, concentration camp survivors, etc. about survival tactics.


bunch of suburbian folks stocking up cans of beans is as prepping for camping.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 20:47 | 3044492 Spirit Of Truth
Spirit Of Truth's picture

That "preppers" are the object of such popular scorn at this top of extreme collective insanity is telltale from a contrarian standpoint.  In other words, preppers are the sane ones:

The scoffers and mockers are the lunatic fringe.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 21:07 | 3044537 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

there is even a TV show about preppers which I see as counter indicator.


US printed 3 Trillion and no country can do shit demonstrates power of USA. only preppers should be poor iranians who are going to get labeled as terrorists and invaded for oil to pay for bankster bonuses.


In that TV show, there was an episode where a Doctor was buying bunch of medical supplies to prep for worst case scenario. His wife is Vietname war survivor who ate rats and shit in caves for months while men were killing each other. She said "when chaos breaks out, you will need to do whatever to survive" meanign basically forget about any comfort.


better yet, don't buy luxuries in the first place and you won't miss any. fat fucks who can't walk a mile think gallons of fuel will help them. that's like upper class in titanic trying to save family jewels when they don't know how to swim.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:57 | 3044791 SafelyGraze
SafelyGraze's picture

not to neglect the guy who puts a pig on a stick

spoiler: his name is jack

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 00:03 | 3044930 55 men
55 men's picture

When I was playing college ball a few years ago, I played with a guy who wanted the attention, wanted to be good but didnt want to work for it. On the first game of the season when the refs called the captains to the middle. The team looked at me and the 3 guard. We looked at each other as if we both were going to go together, as we started to take our first step, the point guard ran to the middle of the court to accept the position. This guy averaged 5 turnovers a game while I was 2nd and my buddy was first in scoring. Our team became divided at this very scene. No this story is important but when I read this it reminded of what kind of people are power hungry, even with something so small like this. If its sports, business, family or even school group programs; these people are everywhere and they are cancers among teams. I could care less for any type of position, I am somebody who leads by example and could give a rats ass about being noticed for it.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 01:17 | 3045008 Michaelwiseguy
Michaelwiseguy's picture

The one thing people should have learned from Hurricane Sandy is; The Federal Government won't and can't take care of you.

You're a dinosaur if you're watching mainstream media TV news these days.

We selectively get coherent factual news from the Internet now.


This is too easy for everyone to do to keep their families warm in cold conditions;

Rocket Stove Mass Heater

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 02:12 | 3045077 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

Global intelligence firm Stratfor has published an interesting primer on situational awareness, which is a skill which must be honed in order to live, not just survive, when the SHTF. Many years ago at West Point we were expected to be SA at all times. It is still etched in my mind.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 02:55 | 3045111 BraveSirRobin
BraveSirRobin's picture

"situational awareness"

It's why the sights on the M-16 and M-4 are so high above the receiver body, to keep the head up so you have better situational awareness. It's one simple reason why it's a fabulous combat rifle.

It's also why the F-86 torched all those Mig-15's over Korea. Look at the cockpit canopies on each aircraft. The F-86 pilot is head and shoulders above the airframe, while the Mig-15 pilot is only head above the airframe. The difference in visibility and situational awareness is striking, and gave the F-86 stick a great combat advantage.

It's often the little things that make a big difference. Keep your head up and on a swivel. That will help you get through the day.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 07:08 | 3045205 Supernova Born
Supernova Born's picture

1) The .gov agent

You know an article is bullshit when it doesn't even mention the "cough", FBI agent who simply believes you must do something criminal and ultra-fucking stupid NOW (or at least begin conspiratorial planning by taking at least one concrete step...).

Yes, join up with a bunch of people today. Strangers are your best protection.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 07:39 | 3045229 Lost My Shorts
Lost My Shorts's picture

Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment?

Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they?

Which of you by taking thought can add one cubit unto his stature? 28 And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin:

And yet I say unto you, That even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.

Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which to day is, and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith?

Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed?

(For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things.

But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

How many of you preppers are Christian?  What would Jesus do?  Was Jesus a fool?  Or is there wisdom in the words of Jesus?

Just asking.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 09:08 | 3045278 overmedicatedun...
overmedicatedundersexed's picture

lost, I know you believe..hope you never doubt. evil is so very real and as Ann Barnhardt sp says those who bend a knee and support this fascist gov are evil as well. she says she will not pay any taxes to this beast in DC..brave lady maybe nuts but insanity should not disqualify her just look at our potus. crazy as bat shit that one.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 10:12 | 3045322 Lost My Shorts
Lost My Shorts's picture

I must confess, I am  not really religious.  I do believe Jesus was essentially correct on this issue, but it's a long, complicated argument.  I also believe most preppers have seen too many Kevin Costner movies.  OK, they can dance on my grave.  Fine.

This post was fascinating in revealing the variety of whack jobs within the prepper movement.  My advice to preppers would be:  relative isolation alone is plenty to keep you safe.  Beyond that don't think too much.  The tone of this discussion strongly suggests that more thinking among this group does not produce more safety.

I also can't help but notice that discussing whether to eat the flesh of the corpses of your neighbors pretty well defines what Jesus would not do

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 10:20 | 3045329 overmedicatedun...
overmedicatedundersexed's picture

the wisdom of idiots: random events rule us all. prepare for your idea of hell, fine. I will only do what I think is needed, a gun or two yes, some food yes, fear of all out collapse no. my advise is be very lucky..practice good luck.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 11:19 | 3045390 gmrpeabody
gmrpeabody's picture

Sounds as if the author has a lot of ZH posters covered here, to me.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 11:34 | 3045408 Monedas
Monedas's picture

Call me crazy .... I think I have all 6 Survival Syndromes .... in my twisted psyche ?

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 14:01 | 3045610 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture



Mon, 12/10/2012 - 10:54 | 3048449 Theosebes Goodfellow
Theosebes Goodfellow's picture

Lost, you have a valid question, but you failed to see that you gave yourself the answer at the same time. The verses you are quoting from are those addressing the concerns of believers in how they are going to provide for themselves, (and their families), and still be witnesses for God.

Jesus tells them, "Hey, God knows that you need all of the necessities of life just like the Gentiles."

So he teaches them the right order of things.

"Seek first the Kingdom of God, and His Righteousness." That simply means that you need to get right in your relationship with God FIRST. That would include following the Ten Commandments, (His Righteousness). Once you are there, (where you and God are tight), all the other stuff will work itself out. ("AND all these things will be added unto you.") God's got your six o'clock.


If you will, these verses are the original prepper instructions. Where "prepperism" teaches one to get your stuff in order BEFORE a cataclysmic event, these verses teach you to get your spirit/soul right with God before same said. Sadly, many people believe that doing this is somehow detrimental to them. Considering that this is the same source of our "inalienable" rights, I'd think we could all be a bit grateful. Maybe not. All that said, Lost My Shorts, good question.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 07:44 | 3045231 Lost My Shorts
Lost My Shorts's picture

blast, edit = dup

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 10:17 | 3045327 Sylvia Plath
Sylvia Plath's picture

Wow he can list personalities from a text book.... WEAK!!!!!!

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 11:31 | 3045405 Monedas
Monedas's picture

I love Korea stuff, thanks !     The North Koreans could teach us a lot about survival under Socialism !   LOL

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 02:49 | 3045110 BraveSirRobin
BraveSirRobin's picture

Might come true? It's already here!

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 04:55 | 3045154 prains
prains's picture

This article describes 50% of americans, effectively making the 1%, 2%


YOU ARE THE 48%......wait a minute

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 01:33 | 3045016 TwoShortPlanks
TwoShortPlanks's picture

Who needs to prep?! History tells us food will be lying around everywhere.

"I shudder to tell that many of our people, harassed by the madness of excessive hunger, cut pieces from the buttocks of the Saracens already dead there, which they cooked, but when it was not yet roasted enough by the fire, they devoured it with savage mouth."
- Fulcher of Chartres, Seige of Ma'arra, 1098AD -

Prepping is mostly mental, emotional and physical...stocking cans, water and ammo will merely get you to first base. To make a home run, you've got to be extra super special, you've got to have an extraordinary ability and capacity to subdue and completely lock-out your humanity.

You reckon you've got what it takes?....LOL, 99.99% of preppers are dreaming.

TIP: Monsters don't need to prep, they'll thrive.

Important info:

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 01:50 | 3045059 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

“If you believe you can accomplish everything by "cramming" at the eleventh hour, by all means, don't lift a finger now. But you may think twice about beginning to build your ark once it has already started raining”
Max Brooks

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 02:55 | 3045091 TwoShortPlanks
TwoShortPlanks's picture

Anyone on the internet discussing Prepping on ZH or making YouTube Vids about Prepping isn't Prepping...they're just blowhorns painting their own target. Just clicking on this thread makes you a target.

Be easy to make a DB of all the online Preppers out there, in advance....put together a group of ex Army mates and make house calls when the time comes, or just sell/trade the list over and over again.

You reckon YouTube, FaceBook, Google, AOL, ZeroHedge wouldn't trade a list of Mac Addresses? LOL, wake up!

ZH alone would have several hundred thousand, and what about all the hits on Prepping videos on YouTube, there's another million. Imagine the lists Gov Depts have compiled already, if they're doing such a thing.

Hit Prediction: Preppers Lists will be worth more than Gold.

Pffft, I said, 99.99% are clueless as to what survival really means.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 18:14 | 3045970 Chuck Walla
Chuck Walla's picture

Good for you 2 Short, we are practicing ambushes.


Sat, 12/08/2012 - 19:43 | 3046109 Parrotile
Parrotile's picture

Hit Prediction: Preppers Lists will be worth more than Gold.

Well those stuck on land will be relatively fixed, relatively immobile targets, and relatively accessible without the need for any specialist skills or equipment.

This is why we live on a boat: one that's large and stable enough to comfortably face transoceanic passages, but still compact enough to provide a fairly small radar cross-section.

If you cannot see your target, you cannot engage your target.


Sun, 12/09/2012 - 07:25 | 3046613 TwoShortPlanks
TwoShortPlanks's picture

Watch out for Drones.

Sun, 12/09/2012 - 08:28 | 3046639 ManOfBliss
ManOfBliss's picture

Boats are floating suicide devices.

Have fun coming back to land when you run out of resources.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 02:57 | 3045112 ronaldawg
ronaldawg's picture

I hear them Saracens are tasty.....

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 05:20 | 3045164 TPTB_r_TBTF
TPTB_r_TBTF's picture

A true survivalist will cut more than just a rump steak from his neighbor.  It's all food except maybe the large intestine...  See "film: The Road"

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 06:06 | 3045182 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

You can however use the large intestines of your neighbors for sausages as well.  

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 07:58 | 3045239 homme
homme's picture

That's true. Properly cured and filled with a few pebbles, a bladder can become a perfectly functional childs toy.  

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 15:12 | 3045356 CPL
CPL's picture

We're not called long pig for nothing.


Confessions of a cannibal from vice studios

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 09:21 | 3045290 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

Also good with some fava beans and a nice Chianti.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 11:40 | 3045414 Monedas
Monedas's picture

I'll bet liberals taste like the shit in their brains .... let alone the large intestine .... better to mutilate them and make field hands out of them .... picking cotton comes to mind !

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 21:44 | 3046162 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture



7) The Epicurean

Knows that sausage casings are made with the small intestine, not the large intestine, of animals.

Understands that the rennet for making cheese comes from the stomach of most mammals.

Has experienced Jesus' parable of the wine skins first hand.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 06:51 | 3045204 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

Warning: "long pork" is "starvation food", highly toxic and dangerous without expert knowledge (which is anyway not worth aquiring - who likes a "certified cannibal chef"?)

The taboo around it is very, very powerful, and if you seriously "prep" for an environment without law enforcement (your biz, your hobby), then you should prep for a realistic human environment i.e. that is based on taboos and customs where they might become fluid but also more important

Look around, there is already a de-humanizing, "it's ok to kill them" meme growing around "zombies" in the US

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 08:17 | 3045250 TPTB_r_TBTF
TPTB_r_TBTF's picture


Warning: "long pork" is "starvation food", highly toxic and dangerous without expert knowledge (which is anyway not worth aquiring - who likes a "certified cannibal chef"?)

It's really not that difficult. You just put your neighbor on a liquid diet a few days before he is to be butchered.  That sorta "rinses" the toxins out.  a.k.a. "fasting".  How To

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 02:59 | 3045115 BraveSirRobin
BraveSirRobin's picture

I'd say your post self-classifies you as a (3) Moral Relativist personality type.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 10:34 | 3045345 TwoShortPlanks
TwoShortPlanks's picture

I haven't posted what I really think.

Sun, 12/09/2012 - 11:46 | 3046826 jwoop66
jwoop66's picture

The meat cutting vid was probably helpful to some, but to speak authoritatively and then post a clip from "apocolypse now" ?   Please...

People who view life from a hollywood perspective will be the first ones having their buttocks roasted.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 10:51 | 3045362 verum quod lies
verum quod lies's picture

I think I saw that show; I believe she was Cambodian. Regardless, she is no longer in Southeast Asia and is married to a "prepper" in the US. You like her can hope for the best and stand ready to migrate to another country when the SHTF (assuming there is one untouched by the crisis that will accept you) then marry a prepper in that country. In place of preps you might want to practice the following: “Hey GI me love you longtime.” Sounds like a plan girlfriend.


Fri, 12/07/2012 - 21:32 | 3044588 I think I need ...
I think I need to buy a gun's picture

everything is fine

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 21:42 | 3044611 RobD
RobD's picture

I was down at the hard wood store getting some stock for a new project and I see a sign for the grand opening of a Prepper  store next door. I'm like holly shit if this guy can make a go of it then there are a lot of preppers in the area. I bet he is gone in less then a year but who knows. Nice to have a place to pick up a packet of O2 absorbers or some Mylar bags instead of getting a bunch off the net. This was in Reno by the way.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 17:22 | 3045917 FEDbuster
FEDbuster's picture

The store around here has been in business for over two years and seems to be doing well.  They are overpriced compared to the internet, but some people need to touch and feel and talk about their prepping needs.

I like to think keeping a low profile is the best bet.  Enough people onsite to cover a 24/7 watch, with the help of some solar, motion sensor flood lights.  Plus, a plan to bail out, if things go FUBAR at the homestead.

"Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face." Mike Tyson

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 12:50 | 3045518 rlouis
rlouis's picture

Slightly less dire than the subject here, but here's some observations and comparisons on what happened in Russia by a Russian who lived through it, following their collapse and America. Their population dropped from around 149 million to 141 million in the years in between - not the apocalypse but reflect tough times. In some ways, Russians were better prepared than Americans.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 21:39 | 3044602 Milton Freewater
Milton Freewater's picture

Smart talk, Aldous.   I realy enjoy talking about cool rifles but wounder if books on retoric, negotiation and conflict reolution shouldn't as important in our survival kits as ammo.  We may have to defend our families the hard way in the not so near future but recreating our new local worlds will be done through calm, smart, brave, men and women.  Getting along is the real skill of the future.  Exercise the muscle.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:39 | 3044764 Money Squid
Money Squid's picture

stocking up cans of beans means there will soon be a gas attack.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 21:41 | 3044605 hairball48
hairball48's picture

I live in the Flathead. Maybe I'll look into this outfit. :)

I noticed the lines at the local foodbank this morning on the way to work. People lined up in the snow and cold. I see them every week. The mix is changing. Numbers are larger but interestingly for this area, I see people now in nice cars and wearing suits! Shit is getting bad and the country has a long way to fall yet.

We'll have our share of problems in the Flathead Valley when the shit his the fan. The demographics are good here compared to most of the country... but we have our share of the baggy-ass/cockeyed hat young shitheads with no job, no job skills, no education, and no moral scruples of any sort. They will be a major problem at some point after the crash.

I'm in the bottom 10 percentile of ZHers, if not lower, in terms of education and income.  I'm well prepared for the coming social chaos that I am certain beyond all doubt is coming. I want to survive, if for no other reason than I want to see what comes next :)

Soooo...I am not going out whimpering and turning the other cheek. Those lil shitheads in baggy pants come for my stuff, they better standby to standby. I'm defending my shit.

Gold, silver, and bullits bitchez!

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 21:56 | 3044649 forwardho
forwardho's picture

Hairball, that you can see yourself in relation to others puts you far above and beyond the lower 10%. humility is a gift from God, one of his many graces. You have placed yourself in the spot you will be needed. Good luck & God speed.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:17 | 3044711 hairball48
hairball48's picture

Thanks for the moral support. We're all going to need a lot of luck.

I'm optimistic about the future 20 years from now when I'm probably dead or an institutionalized "drooler" waiting for the next generationers to pull my plug :)

However, we gotta live through the near term to get there...and I'm very worried about the interim period of riots and chaos. The riots in Europe are coming here in time. Youth unemployment will be rising sharply here in the USA...soon. The fiscal cliff is a joke, a distraction is all. Unemployment is headed higher. especially in the <30 group.

America is a violent place. Everyone's armed including me. When these armed, unemployed "kids" with no home, no nothing get hungry...only the naive believe that scenario will end well. People will die violently going after food, or defending it. America is not ready for the coming dollar implosion and social/economic collapse.

Those of you living in highly populated areas, especially areas near very poor communities/neighborhoods, are fucked. You just don't know it yet :)

Scary times are coming bitchez

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:25 | 3044728 Freddie
Freddie's picture

Dude. You sound a lot smarter than the majority of folks.  I appreciate your humility but you sound like you have your head on straight.  I cannot say that for about 90% of the populace.  All the best to you.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 00:13 | 3044952 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

Hairball, it makes me sad to hear you sell yourself so short. Pragmatism, an understanding of current realities, and preparing for an uncertain and possibly violent future are worthy endeavors. In terms of survival, I honestly feel having my college degree in microbiology is a worthless piece of shit. That stupid piece of paper served me well in the Matrix but since swallowing the red pill, I realize I am woefully underskilled in many necessities. Yeah, I'm scared and desperately trying to catch up. I'm very fortunate to have married a man who grew up on a dairy farm so is well versed on farm life and all the difficulties it entails. He blew my " is must be like Green Acres" fantasy. Im also fortunate to live in rural part of San Diego with wonderful, heavily armed like-minded neighbors. Most of us farm on a small to moderate scale. We could hold out for quite a while. The fear that gives me nightmares at night is that I work 42 miles away from home and if a disaster were to strike, natural or man made , I'd be unable to get home or die trying. This is the trap of prepping, there is just no way to plan for all scenarios. Don't be envious of an education....I'm frankly jealous of your skills. Take care and be safe always.


Sat, 12/08/2012 - 01:16 | 3045026 willwork4food
willwork4food's picture

Miffed- one of the best gifts of survival are to understand your weaknesses, which you have identified well. It's actually very good your home is a ways from the city, I wish I had that luxury.

Just like the survivers working in the trade center when shit started going south and they were told to go back to work-be like they were: if you're at work and feel something creepy GTFO and fast. If it was a false alarm, blame it on a sudden fever.

Good luck.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 01:44 | 3045053 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

Oh Ww4f thanks for your kind words! After posting I've been curled up on the couch obsessing on all kinds of shit. My BOB I carry in the car is not good enuf. If all freeways are clogged what are my cross country routes? What if the Indians won't let me hike through their reservation...the mountain in the alternate route is too hard to climb and will add at least 6 extra miles. What if I get bitten by a rattlesnake? Shit I didn't include a rattlesnake kit in the BOB. Shit, if I get bit it's over and I should just put the gun to my temple. I'll never carry enuf water for the entire journey ...I need to cashe some along the route. What if the route I end up forced to take is no where near my cashe? OMG I am not sleeping tonight.

You are right. I am going to GTFO when there is a whiff of something amiss. I will trust my instincts, they have served me well in that past so they wont fail me when I really need them. I hope to find you safe as well on the other side. Best wishes and good night!


Sat, 12/08/2012 - 12:32 | 3045486 Terminus C
Terminus C's picture

The key to sanity is to not be afraid of death.  That doesn't mean roll over and die... but don't be afraid of dying.  No matter what you do, "on a long enough time line..."

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 14:54 | 3045703 TJ00
TJ00's picture

An additional point is that the best way to avoid dying needlessly is not to be in a dangerous situation in the first place, this takes situational awareness and if necessary making the choice to be safe even if it contradicts an "authority" e.g. all those who were drafted into the Vietnam war who went to Canada were safe from dying in that war.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 14:44 | 3045689 TJ00
TJ00's picture

Put a bike in your car, add a water bottle on the frame, it will get you to your destination quicker and if you run over a rattlesnake it won't react quickly enough to bite you, I hope that helps you sleep tonight.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 19:27 | 3046080 Parrotile
Parrotile's picture

There are a number of very lightweight, very compact folding bikes on the US Market - are but one supplier. We've got two US built folders (complete with legal lights and carry-bags!) built by Helios - and they are really efficient, with a decent transmission too.

Fit easily into the boot of even a modest sized car, and OK for many, many miles of trouble-free cycling.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 02:08 | 3045071 Bad Attitude
Bad Attitude's picture

Miffed, all you can do is try to recognize potential risks and try to manage those risks within the constraints of the resources at your disposal.

After I bought my house a few years ago - nice house in a nice quiet neighborhood - I discovered a lot of section-8 housing uncomfortably close to my house. Things could get interesting as everything starts to fall apart. On the other hand, I cut my commute from 45 minutes each way to ten minutes each way. So, I traded much of the everyday risk of spending so much time in heavy traffic to the potential future risk of hungry rioting mobs.

I keep a small survival kit in my vehicle, with food, water, and other supplies that would either allow me to camp out a few days at work, or try to make it back to my house six miles from where I work. I have a CHL, and am always armed except inside the workplace, where my employer frowns on firearms in the workplace. I even carry a firearm when in my own house.

Bullets, beans, and bandages, bitchez.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:21 | 3044713 Aurora Ex Machina
Aurora Ex Machina's picture

If you've enough humility to take claim of the bottom 10% in this bear-pit, then I'm sure you're not busy categorising, labelling and marking in your little-red-book the scorecard of others, but rather will find yourself well liked, much to your surprise, if things go bad. The mark of a real human is acknowledging your own flaws, and working through them with others.


Good luck, and keep your toes warm.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:27 | 3044735 Sparkey
Sparkey's picture

Basicly I like your attitude Hair Ball, and I respect your prescience, yet for all your intelligence you are still unaware; you are a player, in a play, aplay we all play collectively, the "lil shitheads in baggy pants", were cast in their roles the same way you got yours,we  were born into them. What this play needs is, Better writers, Lets start demanding better plots, we would all be a lot happier and productive if the play had a more obvious happy ending, Many people feel that, without a major rewrite soon, this play will devolve into a tragedy, playing a part in a tragedy is no fun at all!

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:31 | 3044747 Aurora Ex Machina
Aurora Ex Machina's picture

And yet, everyone wants to play Hamlet.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 23:08 | 3044812 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

There's no fucking 'Re-WRITE' coming...

This is NOT a play... We are NOT actors... Now ~ go fashion your existence from there...

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 00:06 | 3044937 Sparkey
Sparkey's picture

Your problem Francis is; you can't face reality, so you take refuge in the prompters prompts, your role, you believe, requires you to be a believer in popular culture and dominant themes, you, I believe, permiate all your actions with the confirmation of belief; You reason, this is real I'm doing it, This IS real, you're doing it, so am I,so is the chicken in Skinner's box,on some, not as deep as you might think, level, we all are chickens in boxes responding to the prompts the media brings us.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 01:08 | 3045019 Freddie
Freddie's picture

..responding to the prompts the media brings us.

If the public were smart, they would dump cable and sat TV but the public are sheep.  TV and Hollywood create the ***king Matrix.  I dumped it years ago as they use it to control the serfs.  If you watch it you support it.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 01:36 | 3045043 willwork4food
willwork4food's picture

Umm. Reincarnation w/ decided birth determinations? Very well could be, but there is not an absolute outcome to the possibilities after our birth. Possible, yes, but never* absolute...unless..

Care to join me in another trip around the wheel?


*Never say 'never with God'..

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 05:45 | 3045173 TPTB_r_TBTF
TPTB_r_TBTF's picture

All possible outcomes wil play out after your birth.  You were born into an infinite number of parallel universes.  In each universe, one of all possible outcomes is played out.

The question is-

Is this universe the one in which you survive,

or do you go down in flames this time?

Sun, 12/09/2012 - 01:59 | 3046524 tenpanhandle
tenpanhandle's picture

In that infinate number of universes, what if you live in the universe that has no parallel universes?

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 14:25 | 3045592 Aurora Ex Machina
Aurora Ex Machina's picture

I see I have a critic.

Let's parse out "And yet, everyone wants to play Hamlet", shall we? (And yes, having read Hamlet is useful here)

1) The Literal: All professional Actors (male, although there have been some female) aspire to playing Hamlet in Hamlet, due to the role's complexity and stage time; it is also a tragedy. Thus, the demand is for tragedies, and our authors do well to provide them (and cartharsis, but this would to be to move too quickly in this response), so I have made a joke, the appreciation of which revolves around an audience,...

2) The Social: Hamlet feels:

And still your fingers on your lips, I pray.
The time is out of joint: O cursed spite,
That ever I was born to set it right!

Which is synonymous with "Preppers" feeling that society has gone wrong, is doomed, is about-to-crash, and to form new communities with new (or conservative, in OP's case) values. And yet, a range of "personality types" mire them in the old society, just as Hamlet rails against the hypocrisy and inauthentic emotions of his fellow characters. He also ends up murdering most of them, but that's more in our third category...

3) The Snarky: Our OP, Brandon Smith, has placed himself as "Prince of the Preppers", the protagonist (and with InfoWars involved, perhaps a 3-letter coinprotel asset, sent to break the movement?) who breaks the 4th wall to inform us all of the failings of the movement, and how none are so noble as himself. He puts forth to the stage (us!) the cruelties of wading through the dross that his crusade to start a "Safe Haven" to reach truth demands; how we should root for his victory, even if it means noble self-sacrifice? (And who, we wonder, is his poor Ophelia?) Wondering such, we travel to...

4) The Meta: as a response to Sparkey, who is summoning the realm of:

All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players:
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages.

And so, her/his use of Shakespeare is responded to like-for-like. The implicit assumption is that she/he will note this counterpoint to forge a new composition, which which we reach...

5) The Meta2: Forging a synthesis requires a pointer, as alluded to with a hyperlink not to the play Hamlet, nor anyone playing the role, but Rammstein, "Mein Herz brennt" or "My heart burns" (from the album "Mutter" or Mother, but this would be a tangent not many here could make). The protagonist of the video is visually akin to Hamlet, at least metaphorically, and surely the lyrics call forth Hamlet's internal strife, and journey from fear and rage in sleep to something else? The jarring nature of the piece, both visually and lyrically throws us out of joint (and yet back), and we contrast the gothic horror of Rammstein with the words of this piece, leading to...

6) The Refrain's digression: we look on the pop-psychology of the "six negative types" who will cause so much destruction, and wonder: is this only true of "preppers"? Is the fringe of society inherently unstable? Can we sit back, and point and laugh as if in a zoo, flinging our feces from the gallery? Or is there more to this, are we complicit, as in watching a tragedy unfold? Is this a case of "We have met the enemy, and they are us.", as referenced by another reply here?  And so we ponder on to...

7) The Crescendo: And so, we link all six movements into something larger. Is this piece merely the narcissistic railings of a Prince who has discovered "Something is rotten in the state of Denmark"? Are the Preppers an irrational response to fear, uncertainty and their core values crumbling before (post) modernity, mirrored in their mental fragility (and so all are Hamlets!)? Or have they the element of a dual nature? "I am but mad north-north-west; when the wind is southerly, I know a hawk from a handsaw". Society, responding to the preppers and with fore-knowledge of the tragedy inherent in Hamlet, asks: "And what if you are correct? How do we progress? How do we avoid this path, marked red, toward the future?" The preppers have chosen their response which is to retreat within, to turn away from the future and seek to preserve the old (to which our Prince has realised, Utopias are not easy to forge, and perhaps contain the seeds of their own collapse, a collapse-within-collapse), and so how are we, Society and audience left to procede?...

8) The Clinamen: Ah, but what am I? An author providing a happy ending? An appeal to Authority? Should Sparky get her/his desire for such answered? Multiplicity is "spatio-temporal" rather than internal, but the internal is your own to make.


And so our movement ends.


But, a Coda: "to play" also has the meaning of to manipulate, to attempt to decieve, so central to the narrative of Hamlet, so what is it to be? Is Brandon Smith playing us, are we playing him, is Tyler playing us all, or did I go full retard meta3 and make a self-depreciating joke and response to those beyond the veil, answering with "Mein Herz brennt"?

Then again, perhaps "We are NOT actors", and this is Much Ado about Nothing. It took barely a while to cook up, so the time's barely wasted, worth it for even an ounce of amusement to our gallery.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 14:35 | 3045662 tickhound
tickhound's picture

Daaaaang YO?!?    :)

It wasn't "good or bad until you made me think about it."

Coward's conscience... "Do I bear the ills we have?  Or fly to others I don't know about?"

21st century dumbed down Hamlet.

Good stuff.

Sun, 12/09/2012 - 00:36 | 3046463 tip e. canoe
Mon, 12/10/2012 - 18:12 | 3049935 tip e. canoe
tip e. canoe's picture

same way i feel about being beautiful baby


Mon, 12/10/2012 - 20:32 | 3050334 Aurora Ex Machina
Aurora Ex Machina's picture

Point: statement. 1-0


Compared to the base, do you feel like this?



Mon, 12/10/2012 - 20:40 | 3050364 tip e. canoe
tip e. canoe's picture

Why do ask the question when you already know the answer?

Tue, 12/11/2012 - 01:31 | 3051106 Aurora Ex Machina
Aurora Ex Machina's picture

<deleted> And why would I delete an Octagon of links, a meta-cast?

Perhaps, when threatened by being eaten, a predator refuses the fate and environment offered, and changes the game?

Perhaps, when a new soul appears on the horizon, one should greet it, and not spurn it?

Perhaps, when having tested-to-destruction, one should inform the subject of the Grom-Jabbar?

Perhaps, when levening the weight of your eons of expectation, one should inform the subject of this?

Perhaps, when you're saying hello, you don't muck around, and you clear the confusion and fugue of the subject?

Perhaps, when acting, you should have some compassion for the subject you're acting towards?


Perhaps, you'll end up with this. Of course, the opposite is the reality, but fuck me, it doesn't hurt to be honest for once in a thousand years.


Oh, and really ~ there's a reason why self-harm has been done to keep myself from awakening again, because it was asked for. Still you have this.

Tue, 12/11/2012 - 09:19 | 3051519 tip e. canoe
tip e. canoe's picture

point: question overload 1-1

why do we spend so much time playing zero-sum games?

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 10:59 | 3045368 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

"What this play needs is, Better writers"

We've met the enemy, and they be us.


Sat, 12/08/2012 - 06:11 | 3045184 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

Baggy-ass/cockeyed hat young shitheads are the first onest to get shot on my property when the SHTF.  They sometimes however have useful girfriends that have a few work skiils from having to provide for their useless baggy-ass boyfriend.  I won't shoot the gf until they fuck up on the farm.  

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 07:35 | 3045227 BigDuke6
BigDuke6's picture

I'm glad someones finally mentioned the post-apocalyptic dr strangelove breeding programs where every prepper will get to breed with hot subjugated women.
Definately a big part of the fantasy chain.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 11:00 | 3045369 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

Worked out great in Waco!

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 11:50 | 3045427 Monedas
Monedas's picture

The Clintons had one ugly daughter .... Janet Reno was too ugly to attract a sperm donor .... they were excellent candidates for smoking babies !

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 11:02 | 3045371 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

A block of AAPL says you get capped within two weeks and those baggy-ass foolios eat your preps while playing xbox.

They can't read, but they can aim.


Sat, 12/08/2012 - 11:11 | 3045383 odatruf
odatruf's picture

No they can't. Arms fully extended and gun held 90 degrees from the floor isn't the best way to set sights. I am pretty certain my two hand crouch position (plus the thousands of practice fires) will give me an edge.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 11:35 | 3045410 DanDaley
DanDaley's picture

Good training usually wins the day.  Get off your tookas and train.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 12:59 | 3045531 TheGardener
TheGardener's picture

I dated this kind of chick and I might come to regret it. Now they know my estate, backdoors ,dogs ...

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 19:46 | 3044339 Walter_Sobchak
Walter_Sobchak's picture

what about - "the cannibal"?

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 21:01 | 3044526 El Oregonian
El Oregonian's picture

Awful to think about but meat eaters will have 8+ Billion reasons to do well when the SHTF. Hopefully it doesn't come to that...

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 21:14 | 3044557 Walter_Sobchak
Walter_Sobchak's picture

long bullets, knives, and forks

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 21:48 | 3044631 willwork4food
willwork4food's picture

And tabasco sauce! Unless you can get some pre-spicy Mexican!


OK..i admit this was real, real, real bad humor...

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:09 | 3044690 zuuma
zuuma's picture

Long Pork!

Who knows?  Maybe the zombies taste like walleye!


Sat, 12/08/2012 - 03:41 | 3045133 The Shootist
The Shootist's picture

I'm long coffee -'cause I can't live without. Now to find out how to stack and preserve it...

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:36 | 3044758 The Gooch
The Gooch's picture

Walter, you are NOT supposed to roll om Sahbbatz.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 01:47 | 3045056 Midas
Midas's picture

You're out of your element gooch.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 11:42 | 3045417 The Gooch
The Gooch's picture

Judging by my typing, I was out of my "element" last night.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 19:46 | 3044341 eatthebanksters
eatthebanksters's picture

You left out the 'Road Warrior'

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 21:45 | 3044620 Pinktip
Pinktip's picture

My wife borrowed Mel Gibsons Apocolypto from library last week.

Finally got a chance to watch it tonight.

Then, at 8:40 I opened Drudge Report and look at image on top left

regarding Mayans

No such thing as coincedence.......

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:29 | 3044744 Sparkey
Sparkey's picture

Well there is Pink Tip, but not always, it is up to you to discern which is which!

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 23:03 | 3044803 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

You're officially fucked now... Sun God protect you...

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 08:59 | 3045270 Disenchanted
Disenchanted's picture




Although I don't have much use for Drudge I still check in there once in awhile. I have to admit sometimes the pics and headlines he puts together are flat ass funny. Fer instance right now(Sat. morn 8AM ET) below pic of a bloated Barbara Streisand this headline:


Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:14 | 3044704 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

And any list that doesn't start with "The Professional Criminal" is already fantasy. In fact, I think the procrims will have those other stupid fucks up against the wall the first night out.

People, you been watching too much TV. Get out at night, have a walk around in the dark while there are still cops and functioning street lamps. Not in your 4-ton SUV with the tinted glass -- walk. Everything you see on the streets is waiting for the first chance to kill you. To take your stuff, take your daughter, take your car (for the gas) and eat your testicles with eggs for breakfast.

Come to think of it, that's why nobody goes out at night. Right?

And if you think you can get them before they get you, you are probably correct. The first dozen or score are yours to blow the fuck away. But there are a lot more of them than you, and they are a lot crazier and care-less by a long ways, and they will just keep coming until one of them lands on top and eats your face off.

People laugh about the zombie army at the end of the world. You'll change your mind when that grinning fucker comes at you out of the dark.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:20 | 3044718 Oldballplayer
Oldballplayer's picture

I was in a local gun store the other day and I was waiting to pick up my delivery.  There were four or five fat bodies sitting around talking about what THEY were gonna do with the shit hit the fan.  They had it all planned out.

Until I asked them the last time they had walked five miles with their fifty pound Go Bag and their AK clone?  None of them had walked beyond the mailbox and back for year.

I guess I will just follow behind them for a little bit.  When they drop, I will just take their stuff.

Reading is easy.  Practice is hard. 

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:50 | 3044777 knukles
knukles's picture

Like my MgySgt always said: There'll be plenty weapons lyin on the battlefield

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 00:26 | 3044970 Sparkey
Sparkey's picture

I understand where you are coming from Odd Ball Player, Personaly I enjoy baiting the obese, it isn't as much fun as baiting Stutters was, but there are so few stutters now and you make it up in volume anyway, I guess!, don't get close enough so they can grab you, some of them are very strong and they could turn a fun moment into a very bad mistake, leave the mistakes for someone else... I think my most effective moment was when he hit the ground and started turning purple, an obese man with an obese temper. (mabel didn't sleep so good that night, what an exhilerating experience), life really is fun isn't it?

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 10:15 | 3045325 Oldballplayer
Oldballplayer's picture

I wasnt baiting them, but rather trying to get them to see their obvious weak link in their prepper change.

I am not skin and bones guy, but I can walk five miles in my boots.  I have a backpack, and its been used in the last six months.

I live near a moderately size city, that has had the joy of being placed on the top ten most violent places to live.  I know there is more firepower in that city coming my way than I can defend against.  So any plan will require escape and evasion. 

That point did not seem to dawn on these guys. 

Being obese is not uncommon. Common sense is.

Sun, 12/09/2012 - 12:13 | 3046859 jwoop66
jwoop66's picture

fat=victim ?

Sure, isn't everyone a victim these days?

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:35 | 3044755 forwardho
forwardho's picture

Cougar, reality is a bitch, and then you die. Every time I read some Jackwagons comment of "bring it on bitchez" I realise, they have absolutly no idea of the horrors which are to be born from this "future" of ours. Awake & Aware.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 23:49 | 3044902 Ima anal sphincter
Ima anal sphincter's picture

Life's a bitch and then you marry one.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 05:21 | 3045165 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Lord, deliver us from EVIL!

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:39 | 3044765 delacroix
delacroix's picture

I just took a 5 mile walk around managua @ 7pm, last night I took a local bus halfway to massaya @ 9pm, and another back. I´m a 50´s white american male. I speak little spanish. the poor masses are less a threat to me, than rich powerful control freaks. these people survive by helping each other, and acceptance of reality. the IRS stole more money from me last year  than this 2 week vacation will cost.I am not afraid.

Sun, 12/09/2012 - 12:16 | 3046869 jwoop66
jwoop66's picture

Two week vacation and you're an expert on the locals and their culture?  Without even knowing the language...  Good luck if you stay there any longer.  I guess it is only rich white men who are evil anyway.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 23:16 | 3044827 jumbo maverick
jumbo maverick's picture

Quite often at night I go to a major American craphole to visit the casino. I normally park several blocks away in a run down parking garage. The walk there and back always keeps me on my toes. When you have a pocket of money and potential enemies around things register in your brain more clearly than normal.
If someone has interests in the mindset of others as written in this article I would urge you to go sit at a poker table for a night. You don't even have to play you can just fold every hand. With a lot of time at the table you will begin to see how people truly act, how they deceive, how they dominate, how they become passive, how their brain is thinking. It is truly insightful.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 01:44 | 3045051 DanDaley
DanDaley's picture

Everything is a training exercise, or should be.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 19:47 | 3044343 masterinchancery
masterinchancery's picture

Was there some point to this article--of course you had better be ready for all kinds of people, many of them dishonest or delusional, at ALL times.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 20:16 | 3044407 Citxmech
Citxmech's picture

Yeah - I'm not sure if I understand the audience the author was looking to address.

Personally, I have no desire to hook-up with a bunch "like minded preppers" like I'm looking to join some kind of book club off of Craigslist.  That'd be a recipe for disaster.


Fri, 12/07/2012 - 20:33 | 3044454 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

half are below average IQ by definition so stupid people will do stupid things

half of half are <21 or > 65 and not really plugged into reality

half of that will be religious nuts giving 10% in something that can never been proven.


and that's just the start.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 21:46 | 3044627 hairball48
hairball48's picture

You might be surprised. What you say is no doubt true for some areas of the country. And it's true about some individuals here in MT. But I'd be careful with that broad brush you're wielding :)

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 21:56 | 3044650 SirSnarksalot
SirSnarksalot's picture

half are below average IQ by definition

And more than half don't know the difference between mean and median.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 00:18 | 3044960 Ballin D
Ballin D's picture

IQ is theoretically normally distributed so the mean and median would be the same.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 00:20 | 3044963 aphlaque_duck
aphlaque_duck's picture

The IQ test is normalized (bell curve), so mean and median are the same, 100.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 11:07 | 3045376 verum quod lies
verum quod lies's picture

Since we are splitting hairs, it is normalized for a population, not a sample. Therefore, for a sample, you should expect the mean and median to be different.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 20:02 | 3046142 Parrotile
Parrotile's picture

Since you're splitting hairs - remember that your assertion will be entirely dependent on population size too. A large enough sample will reflect the entire normal distribution quite closely.

In a typical city-sized population you'd better hope that median and mean co-incide, since in view of the progressive dumbing down on the US Educational System (Public and Private alike) since the 1970's I'd not be entirely surprised to see a significant leftward shift of median vs. mean functional intelligence (i.e intelligence relating to useful or useable knowledge).

Which may be of benefit to the aware, or may be an added hazard (unpredicatable reponse)


Sun, 12/09/2012 - 12:17 | 3046873 jwoop66
jwoop66's picture

You talkin about obama voters, now?  did I miss something?

Mon, 12/10/2012 - 09:10 | 3046875 jwoop66
jwoop66's picture


Fri, 12/07/2012 - 20:39 | 3044473 BKbroiler
BKbroiler's picture

exactly, take care of your own.  Friends can turn into enemies quickly when things go bad.  

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 21:22 | 3044570 knukles
knukles's picture

Vignettes of office politics should suffice as to counting on others when the counting starts to count

Best advice is to hang rotting bodies about your boundaries and let it be known....
or have the loudest generator with a big ass neon sign  

"Booze Ammo & Broads"


With rotting bodies....

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 21:32 | 3044589 Freddie
Freddie's picture

Vignettes of office politics should suffice


Dilbert does Prepping

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 23:33 | 3044870 ThaBigPerm
Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:03 | 3044675 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

Like your style, Knucks, but I have a few old, simple, discreet signs that say SNAKE FARM. 

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 23:01 | 3044778 spdrdr
spdrdr's picture

Farmer's sign:

"BEWARE!  There is an anti-personnel mine buried under one of these pumpkin vines!"



"BEWARE!  There is are now an anti-personnel mine buried under one two of these pumpkin vines!"


SNAKE FARM - "now including Rattlesnakes!"



Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:08 | 3044689 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Nothing says stay the fuck out like a head on a stick ;-)

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 22:34 | 3044753 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Vlad the impaler bitchez!

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 23:41 | 3044890 ApollyonDestroy
ApollyonDestroy's picture

BO the decapitator! 

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 23:52 | 3044903 nmewn
nmewn's picture

He did get his point mans terrorist is another mans freedom fighter, so they say.

And he did get out of paying the jizya ;-)

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 01:18 | 3045030 Freddie
Freddie's picture

Colonel Walter E. Kurtz had the right idea.  That f**king lib Martin Sheen was an errand boy sent by grocery clerks.

ObamaCare is a jizya by the way.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 18:53 | 3045074 DanDaley
DanDaley's picture

ObamaCare is a jizya by the way.


Quite agree. People who are wilfully blind will find this out in time much to their dismay, but by then the game will be over for them.

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 10:32 | 3045342 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

heart of darkness

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 23:39 | 3044882 Raymond Reason
Raymond Reason's picture

Always find some useful gem, if one takes the extra time to read through the comments.  Excellent!

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 10:34 | 3045346 rufusbird
rufusbird's picture

Isn't that the truth. Most of the time I spend on the internet is a result of searcing something after reading someone's comments or following a link.

Driven home just now when I clicked on the "just a errand boy link". When the video ended I clicked on a Maron Brando video and watched (starting at 6:30 minute mark) an interview where he makes a particularly relevant observation and comments.

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 23:52 | 3044908 odatruf
odatruf's picture

Your wife/daughter/son's head on stick makes the point even more loudly.



Sat, 12/08/2012 - 00:12 | 3044949 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

no wife...daughter... son... here to worry about [PRE-PLANNED as it was]... So go ahead & put my head on a stick... I'll applaud loudly from afar...

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 00:51 | 3044998 odatruf
odatruf's picture

Just don't kill us, Francis. :)

No children here myself, man.  It's on my mind all the time.  The lady and I talk about it, but we are not sure we are not too selfish for children.  And in my mind, is that something to do to someone that you are going to love so completely? I don't think it is.



Fri, 12/07/2012 - 23:06 | 3044808 Itgoestoeleven
Itgoestoeleven's picture

Amen Brother!

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 23:45 | 3044897 Curt W
Curt W's picture

At some point some dumass prepper will think he has it all under control and flash his gold coins,

GOLD!! dead prepper

Sat, 12/08/2012 - 10:17 | 3045324 Cosimo de Medici
Cosimo de Medici's picture

I think it was autobiographical. Is this the first of his tomes you've read? On his arm this guy has a tattoo that updates an old favorite, "It's my way or...The Road".

Fri, 12/07/2012 - 21:21 | 3044572 New_Meat
New_Meat's picture


"Was there some point to this article?"

Obviously not for you, at this moment.  Perhaps it might be worthwhile to review your mindset with respect to the underlying point of view expressed by the author.

But I can't give you a reddie, since you don't have a clue.  Thereby failing in at least one of the cited categories.

- Ned

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!