Korean Kaption Kontest: Indoor Smoking Allowed

Tyler Durden's picture


What is going on here, for those understandably confused, is North Korea's gregarious and gorgeous leader, Kim Jong-un, sitting in the Korean equivalent of Houston, watching the recent Korean rocket launch... and smoking a cigarette. Take it away.

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Thu, 12/13/2012 - 21:51 | 3061540 Aziz
Aziz's picture

I rike to fuck America with my big, hard rocket

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 21:57 | 3061563 Eireann go Brach
Eireann go Brach's picture

I show Pwesident Obwama who love me long time

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:03 | 3061582 AssFire
AssFire's picture

Kim Jong-un have hole in pocket- He feel cocky all day long.

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:07 | 3061604 ACP
ACP's picture

"Who Doctah Eveewl now, BITCHEZ!"

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:11 | 3061618 Stackers
Stackers's picture

You would think they could afford to have matching desk for them to sit at .....

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:17 | 3061636 ACP
ACP's picture

Notice the heavy jacket also. Must be c-c-c-old in there...

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:17 | 3061639 flacon
flacon's picture

Who Flung Dung?

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:21 | 3061646 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture



Who was Who Flung Dung-Un, Alex? 

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:30 | 3061674 THX 1178
THX 1178's picture

Ronery, I so Ronery...

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:50 | 3061727 Big Slick
Big Slick's picture

2012: More personal freedom in North Korea than in Bloomberg's New York

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 23:20 | 3061790 strannick
strannick's picture

If I had XBox I wouldnt have to play this shit

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 23:33 | 3061824 savagegoose
savagegoose's picture

Japan are still arguing  over what to do about how to react to the  rocket flying over head. either shoot it down, or respond with  stong words. a response should be sometime,,, after their descission on how to best contain the radiation from fuck u shima .


kim su king , watches days of his lives as he awaites their response.

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 23:37 | 3061835 redpill
redpill's picture


Fri, 12/14/2012 - 00:15 | 3061896 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture

who does his hair?

Fri, 12/14/2012 - 01:23 | 3061951 wee-weed up
wee-weed up's picture

Moe, of the Three Stooges.

Fri, 12/14/2012 - 01:27 | 3061953 TruthInSunshine
Fri, 12/14/2012 - 02:04 | 3061977 YBNguy
YBNguy's picture

"I don't always smoke post coitus, but when I do it's a Lucky Strike"

Fri, 12/14/2012 - 03:53 | 3062031 saturn
saturn's picture


Fri, 12/14/2012 - 04:42 | 3062048 old naughty
old naughty's picture

"Gulag Koreapelago" !

I beat Amerika.

By increasing to 1:2 (all) Koreans. Hehehe.

Fri, 12/14/2012 - 04:46 | 3062052 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

FUCK.....money for whole year supply of rice for 10M people just blew up in the sky.

Give me a cig.

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:31 | 3061677 economics9698
economics9698's picture

This shit is boring, where is my whore?

Fri, 12/14/2012 - 01:03 | 3061942 knukles
knukles's picture

I write him time and again, as good Communist he should share sexy wife with me but he hypocrite and say no.
Pecker head

Fri, 12/14/2012 - 21:57 | 3065402 mjcOH1
mjcOH1's picture

Ahhhhh, Virginra Srims!   You've come a rong ray, baby!

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:54 | 3061740 The Gooch
The Gooch's picture


Thu, 12/13/2012 - 23:08 | 3061768 eatthebanksters
eatthebanksters's picture

smoking indoors would be much better with satellite televison...

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 23:16 | 3061784 Matt
Matt's picture

Why do you think he launched a rocket? To get satellite TV, obviously. And to transmit glorious best Korea TV programs to the rest of the world.

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:23 | 3061647 SGS
SGS's picture

upun gangdem style, ooooup oooooooup ooooooup upun gandem style

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:22 | 3061650 ACP
ACP's picture

Take 2: "Witness the powah of my Grand Dong!"

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 23:11 | 3061769 Big Slick
Big Slick's picture

No more yankee my wankee.  The Donger need food!


Thu, 12/13/2012 - 23:23 | 3061800 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture



Yes, mellied!!



Fri, 12/14/2012 - 01:48 | 3061966 putaipan
putaipan's picture

cold. cold .cold.

tera'phone was linging..... told me it was kim jong un il ......

"you gotta what?"

herro- give me missle persons....they tell me- what is it that you neeeeed?

omnomatapoetry, symetry in motion, they heard all about tia waaay across the ocean.

if you'll be my pyongmeng chickin', i'll be your capn'crunch !

iiiiii been down so long , it looks like it's gooooin' up to me....

i hear 'im mooooan , i hear  'im moan.

tripe boogie! tripe boogie!


(apologies to lowell george ......and fuck be(r)nuke fulford !)


miss me yet?



Fri, 12/14/2012 - 09:53 | 3062329 TruthHunter
TruthHunter's picture

That's not a cigarette, thats a North Korean space heater.


Ahh, Swiss Boarding school...those were the good ole' days!

Fri, 12/14/2012 - 00:26 | 3061911 Freddie
Freddie's picture

It looks like he is doing technical analysis and that is Apple's price chart.

Prease go up Appre - I no want margrin carr from Gordman Srachs


Fri, 12/14/2012 - 08:43 | 3062173 Sketch
Sketch's picture

actually - not... the one on the right looks to be 'cherry', whiil the one one the left is darker - maybe oak or walnut?


/Probably all laminate flat pack ikea crap anyway.

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:02 | 3061593 The Shootist
The Shootist's picture

My favorite macaque was on that Rocket. I want everyone to follow me in a moment of silence Big Dong Space Ape, glorious pirate for Kim Jong un.

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:06 | 3061602 unrulian
Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:19 | 3061640 johnQpublic
johnQpublic's picture

you act like you've never seen a dictator before, jaws all on the floor like hitler and stalin just walked through the door

we been building misslies here since the korean war

storing them up to even the score

I've got so many body doubles. It's true. No kidding.
I don't go to the streets. They all do my bidding.
and kim jong il said... Nothing you idiots

kim jong il is dead dead
and i'm his replacement 

 Yeah I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose,
But it's no worse than what's going on in the U.S. war room

sometimes i just want to shoot a rocket to let loose

just like the US and the jews

Obamas down with this. Obama's down with that.
And if he's lucky he might use weapons from Iraq.
And that's the reason if my regime got attacked.
If I react with missiles, I'll surely get jacked!

Of course you're gonna bomb me and my forces
By the time you fly warplanes
I'll be in hong kong sippin' on champagne.
And when you miss me, please don't start to complain.
You've got so many soldiers tearing up  terrain.  

And there's a million of us just like me
Who dress like me, walk, talk, oppress like me
a coat like me, havin a smoke like me
And just might be a , but not quite me!

i'm the jong one, a real strong one

havin a smoke or a bong one 
So won't the real kim jong please stand up?
Please stand up?
Please stand up?

and throw a middle finger on each hand up

i'm outa my mind

i'm outa control

just like my dad

i'm crazy i'm mad

so one more time tell me how does it go?



not the best eminem ripoff but i tried

Fri, 12/14/2012 - 00:05 | 3061883 JPM Hater001
JPM Hater001's picture

I needed an extra Green on that one...

Fri, 12/14/2012 - 08:49 | 3062178 unrulian
unrulian's picture

you win

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 21:59 | 3061576 TwoShortPlanks
TwoShortPlanks's picture

Kim Jong Il on Bombs and Rockets: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dk_DHh5iLrk

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 22:26 | 3061660 So Close
So Close's picture

Sanctions, banktions... The Iranians will pay for this shit with Gold!

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 23:55 | 3061866 williambanzai7
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Fri, 12/14/2012 - 02:17 | 3061987 ShakaZulu
ShakaZulu's picture

This was either 5 minutes before or after the missile fizzled out.

Fri, 12/14/2012 - 03:21 | 3062016 Ratscam
Ratscam's picture

Banzai, paste in a white cat as in those good old bond movies

Fri, 12/14/2012 - 03:29 | 3062023 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Good idea

Fri, 12/14/2012 - 02:35 | 3061998 Nihilarian
Nihilarian's picture

North Korean remake of "Basic Instinct". Cross your legs, Kim!

Fri, 12/14/2012 - 04:50 | 3062053 BadKiTTy
BadKiTTy's picture

"I'm so rone-ry, so rone-ry".


Fri, 12/14/2012 - 06:31 | 3062086 philipat
philipat's picture

Light the blue fuse and retire 50 Meters.

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 21:52 | 3061541 Jim in MN
Jim in MN's picture

Indoor fireworks....can still burn your fingers....bitchez

Thu, 12/13/2012 - 21:52 | 3061546 Missiondweller
Missiondweller's picture

And wearing a coat because they can't afford heat

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