• Tim Knight from...
    04/28/2016 - 00:27
    I was expecting a few boring candidate statements of the U.S. Senate - AKA the World's Most Exclusive Club - but, boy, was I wrong. Just take a look at some of these gems.
  • Tim Knight from...
    04/28/2016 - 00:27
    I was expecting a few boring candidate statements of the U.S. Senate - AKA the World's Most Exclusive Club - but, boy, was I wrong. Just take a look at some of these gems.

It Is Five Time More Difficult To Get An Attendant Job At Delta Airlines Than Enter Harvard

Tyler Durden's picture




 

There is a reason why the monthly BLS JOLTS jobs supply/demand survey - which supposedly shows an "improving" labor picture because more people are willingly leaving their (temporary) jobs, and there are more job openings - is so laughable it is not even worth reporting. The reason is the following: practical, non-massaged reality, such as this report confirming how great the demand for any real job openings is. According to Bloomberg Delta, the world’s second-largest carrier, received 22,000 applications for about 300 flight attendant jobs in the first week after posting the positions outside the company. The applications arrived at a rate of two per minute, Chief Executive Officer Richard Anderson told workers in a weekly recorded message. Applicants will be interviewed in January and those hired will begin flying in June, for the peak travel season. Said otherwise, the previous few lucky hires will have overcome an acceptance ratio of 1.3%. Putting this into perspective, the acceptance ratio at Harvard, the lowest of any university, is 5.9%. In other words, it is 4.5x easier to enter Harvard than to get a job at Delta. As an attendant. And there is your jobs supply-demand reality in one snapshot.

The good news? This is actually an improvement from 2 years ago, when the Atlanta-based carrier received 100,000 applications for 1,000 jobs when it last hired flight attendants in October 2010.

But wait there is hope: a spokeswoman, said it could reach 400, pushing the acceptance ratio to a whopping 1.8%. All the successful applicants will need to do is speak Japanese, Hindi, Mandarin or Portuguese.

And now back to your Orwellian reality where the unemployment rate is falling, and there is absolutely no secular mismtach between job skills and demands in today's centrally-planned economy.

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Sat, 12/22/2012 - 14:45 | 3089815 Freddie
Freddie's picture

Probably every scumbag professor at every college is in a ******g union.   Nobel Prize Winner Dr. Paul Krugman aka world biggest d**chebag is probably in one.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 12:24 | 3089681 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Coffee, Tea or PhD...

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 12:41 | 3089699 gould's fisker
gould's fisker's picture

We need more applicants for college loans so they can qualify for the cornucopia of job choices in our recovering economy; for example, we need more linguist experts to fill the stewardess ranks. Banzai!!!

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 12:30 | 3089682 dwdollar
dwdollar's picture

"And now back to your Orwellian reality where the unemployment rate is falling, and there is absolutely no secular mismtach between job skills and demands in today's centrally-planned economy."

LOL... Tyler, that should be placed permanently at the top of the site somewhere.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 12:39 | 3089694 gould's fisker
gould's fisker's picture

The President said in his tv appearance yesterday evening that the economy is improving, nothing more here to see, move along; and btw, the government sponsored debasement of working age adults is taking applications--after all, they "choose" to leave the work force so they're substandard.  Orwellian indeed.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 12:40 | 3089696 AnAnonymous
AnAnonymous's picture

Job opportunity market as 'americans' say.

This stated, people willing to join Harvard, follow a long process of pre selection (that is, for people who send applications, others are hand picked) so it is quite natural they have a higher success ratio than 'americans' who think they are qualified for a job and send an application in case of.

Could do the same for the burger at the corner of street, reporting the same result, that is an extremelly high application turning down rate.

Being able to suck off resources just for the sake of consuming sometimes gives out distorted perception of what work is. 'Americans' are full in it with their core mantra of consuming more to consume even more.

But, hey, the 'american' solution for this too much of people is well known: they are plenty of countries around the world that only wait for 'americans' ingenuosity, excellency, entrepreneurship, love for freedom, truth and justice to start developing themselves.

So, yeh, all these 'americans' are going to teach people how to consume their environment faster and larger.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 13:54 | 3089767 Bay of Pigs
Bay of Pigs's picture

Could you just eat a bullet?

 

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 14:04 | 3089777 akak
akak's picture

Actually, I find AnusAnonymous enormously entertaining --- one so rarely finds blind hate, kneejerk bigotry, denial of reality, ragingly obvious psychological projection, and autistic imperviousness to all facts so neatly rolled up into one perfect stinking ball of crap.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 14:28 | 3089801 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

But it is a remarkably CONSISTANT perfectly stinking ball of crap which is it's appeal.

Because an anus is built to do one thing right no matter to what many uses others may choose to use it for.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 15:23 | 3089851 akak
akak's picture

What I really have to wonder about in all his many idiotic posts are the (handful) of up-arrows that he sometimes receives --- can any honest, semi-intelligent ZH poster actually AGREE with that retarded bigot?  Ever?  Or are they just generated by multiple sock-puppets of AnusAnonymous?  Because I have a VERY hard time believing that almost anyone here could be that stupid AND that dishonest (aside from LTER and one or two others).

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 17:12 | 3089996 Rogue Trooper
Rogue Trooper's picture

Well looking at the number of down arrows you have subsequently recieved.  I would say you have predicted the the likely suspects with uncanny accuracy ;)

Back to the 'trolly dolly', sorry, 'flight attendant' post I only fly on Asian airlines.  Korean Air is something to behold....... they tend to look like the ones that failed the 'Girls Generation' auditions.... 

Enjoy (Warning - keep the sound on mute) and ponder the 'production' qualities:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P40FCDFFkg4

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 22:16 | 3090630 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Oh, to be young and so naively optimistic again...

Sun, 12/23/2012 - 13:06 | 3091444 Poetic injustice
Poetic injustice's picture

I had to upvote him once... I still feel a shame about that.

Even all remaining minuses on him do not compensate that one.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 16:59 | 3089984 Rogue Trooper
Rogue Trooper's picture

akak.... I could not agree more... AnooneeMousee could almost be a Tyler whose gone off the plantation. The pigeon englishee is almost too perfect!

Have YUAN will travel?

/I so miss Professor Hammy Wanger :(

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 23:32 | 3090772 trav777
trav777's picture

so, IOW, he's you?

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 12:45 | 3089711 I am Jobe
I am Jobe's picture

Because most DELTA chicks can't get be prostitutes.

 

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 12:52 | 3089715 Fuh Querada
Fuh Querada's picture

Fun post and hot chick but of course an invalid comparison because statistically the 2 populations (applicants to Harvard and to Delta) are not comparable, particularly in sexual orientation, ducky.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 12:58 | 3089717 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Making money more popular than spending money on an education of questionable value (well, OK, a Harvard skin is worth more than most, but still). 

Not entirely shocking.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 13:00 | 3089720 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

Disgruntled Delta employees can apply to Yorkshire Airlines. I’ll bet they feel right at home…

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 19:10 | 3090262 Rogue Trooper
Rogue Trooper's picture

LOL....Harry Enfield is my favorite...

Trolly Doris!

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 13:08 | 3089727 Shizzmoney
Shizzmoney's picture

Everyone knows this bullshit.  For year Ivy League schools have had a "pay-to-play" system.  Look at how George W Bush got into Yale; all thye had to do was look at the old man's bank account statement and BOOM! Accepted.

Helps if you are colored, too, if you are an above average student.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 13:11 | 3089729 batterycharged
batterycharged's picture

So what are the odds of getting a job at the Post Office?

 

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 13:22 | 3089737 djsmps
djsmps's picture

I was flying on United one day and their skymag had an article about the original stewardesses in the 1930's. I was offered coffee shortly thereafter and recognized my flight attendant from the article.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 15:10 | 3089840 optimator
optimator's picture

djsmps,  If that's original I'd suggest hiring onto Saturday Nite Live as one of their high priced writers.  that's the best laugh I've had in a long time.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 15:19 | 3089848 optimator
optimator's picture

Years ago I wanted to fly United, but the stewardess wouldn't let us.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 15:30 | 3089859 akak
akak's picture

If you REALLY want to piss off a stewardess --- oops!, I mean "flight attendant" --- on your next flight, just whistle down the aisle and shout out "Excuse me, waitress, could you ....?"

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 13:24 | 3089740 NumberNone
NumberNone's picture

The actual acceptance rate is much, much higher because according to BLS about 50% of those people that applied are no longer in the workforce.  I assume since they don't count as people out of work, they don't count as people applying for jobs.

 

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 13:43 | 3089759 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture

I'll bet you that the of the 22,000 that applied to Delta, at most 1 or 2 would have gotten into Harvard...

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 15:27 | 3089858 redeals
redeals's picture

Most were probably intelligent enough to teach at Harvard. Which isn't saying much.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 17:34 | 3090032 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture

Sure buddy, whatever you say...

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 17:54 | 3090070 Freddie
Freddie's picture

Careful - Mr. Krugman gets testy when you diss University Profs who are shiftless union goons.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 21:26 | 3090547 Rogue Trooper
Rogue Trooper's picture

I'll bet you that of the 100 they actually hire - only one will actually look like the chick in the picture.... she will also never fly but be used in some lame TeeVee Ad about real Delta 'Stewardesses', opps!, I meant 'Flight Attendants'.

 

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 13:49 | 3089762 ArmyofOne
ArmyofOne's picture

Spaming application is all the rage today.   You wouldn't have seen these kind of ratio's if they had to physically apply.  Makes a yuck yuck points but says nothing more.  

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 13:54 | 3089768 ali-ali-al-qomfri
ali-ali-al-qomfri's picture

why has nobody thanked the Fed and Ben for creating these jobs?

can't wait to see what he creates next.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 13:57 | 3089770 q99x2
q99x2's picture

George Bush went to Yale and Harvard. You need to be intelligent and be able to, at least, speak at Delta. If you can't do the job they won't hire you. Not so at Harvard and the White House. They'll let any retards in at those places.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 13:59 | 3089772 Jake88
Jake88's picture

bullish or bearish?

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 13:59 | 3089773 tnquake
tnquake's picture

How many of the applicants are Harvard grads?

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 14:20 | 3089792 DavosSherman
DavosSherman's picture

Apply at JetBlue.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 14:40 | 3089812 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

Lol,

At least the stews on Southwest have a decent sense of humor.

After a particularity harrowing landing with very high groundwinds, the stew came on the loudspeaker and after the usual speech said " ...and be sure to tell the pilot which of those landings you liked the best."

A little levity after the all that screaming was appreciated.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 15:52 | 3089884 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

How many of you remember Eastern Airlines? It was my first flight as a tot. My destination was SW Florida to visit my grandparents. Let’s see:

 

  • A real plate
  • Stainless steel utensils
  • A cloth napkin
  • Strawberry crepes was my breakfast

Then I started international travels, you always dreaded the US connection flight to/from your final US destination.  

I had this misfortunate experience a year ago. My only choice was Southwest airline. I was in line, the guy next to me is practically masturbating in line.

HE: We have the front seats on this flight

ME: So what, it’s a cattle flight

HE: You should be lucky that we hit the lottery for first seat boarding.

ME: Looks like you forgot your cowbell.  In the future, TSA will rent you a lawn chair so you can journey from the baggage compartment aimed at more frequent flyer miles. mmmmmoooooooooooooo

He sat across the aisle and never said another word to me. 

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 17:48 | 3090055 Freddie
Freddie's picture

LOL!  Great story.  More eveidence of the USA morphing into the USSR and will implode just like  the USSR did.   I know idiots who love SW too.  A Texas version of Aeroflot. 

Anyone remember the union goons at Eastern Airlines still walking the picket line in Miami (MIA) about 6 years after the airline was long dead?

 

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 14:46 | 3089816 Skip
Skip's picture

Pat Buchanan several years ago wrote how White Christian types are discriminated against in admission to Harvard.

Pat's latest most relevant to t his post by TD

How can spending go down when a million legal immigrants arrive annually, 85 percent from the Third World, and most lacking the academic and linguistic abilities or the work skills of Americans?

These immigrants—and, with "immigration reform," 11 million to 12 million illegals, as well—will be eligible for welfare, earned income tax credits, food stamps, rent supplements, Medicaid, Head Start, free schooling K-12 with two or three free meals a day at school, Pell Grants and student loans at graduation, job training and unemployment checks for 99 weeks.

Under Bush and Barack Obama both, these programs have exploded. And with 40 percent of all babies now born to single moms in America, does anyone believe these programs will shrink?

When the Great Wave of immigrants came between 1890 and 1920, these programs did not exist. In the 1930s, welfare was seen even by FDR as a temporary necessity to get through the hard times.

Our gargantuan welfare state of today, however, is permanent, as are the millions of government employees who milk and manage it.

Can A Country With A Million Legal Immigrants A Year Ever Afford GOP Tax Cuts?


American Job Displacement Continues In November—But Bernanke Plans To Suck In More Immigrants Anyway!

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 15:03 | 3089833 dolph9
dolph9's picture

As long as there is such a thing as the United States of America, mass immigration will never stop.

We will go to 350 then 400, then 450, then 500, then a billion people.

Why?

1)  The national myth is that immigration built this country.  This is only half true of course...ultimately, immigration builds every country, because long enough into the past, we all came from somewhere else.  And of course, this neglects the contribution of native born people who are not immigrants.  They must forever "make way" for new immigrants to come to their lands.

2)  Both political parties support mass immigration.  The Democrats support it for the votes and "diversity" brownie points, the Republicans support it for low wage labor.  Neither party has done anything substantial on immigration for 47 years.  In 1965 the doors were let open and it's been no turning back since then.  The Republican saint Ronny Reagan?  He signed an amnesty for illegals.  Enough said.

 

Of course, the country will collapse in the meantime so ultimately the immigration factor is somewhat moot.  Immigrants are the patsies entering a dying country.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 18:30 | 3090151 yabyum
yabyum's picture

Is Pat still alive? Crazy uncle Pat, everbodies favorite Catholic Facist, next to Hannity:)

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 15:20 | 3089828 Freddie
Freddie's picture

These jobs were pretty miserable before but are worse now because most airports are gulags now.  We can't offend those muslim terrorists by profiling especially the one in the wh*te hut.

It is weird but post 911 - the USA is more and more like the old USSR.  No jobs, the air travel is more dangerous and far more unpleasant.  Aeroflot was loaded with KGB.  A lot of US carriers doing overseas have some ex CIA as pilots.  My old neighbor was one. 

Oh and around 2008 - I felt that the USA would implode like the old USSR.  The old folks would get crushed with ZIRP, followed by inflation followed by SS, Medicare et al imploding.  Then the uSA will break up like the old USSR or have a civil war.

Wolverines!

 

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 15:11 | 3089841 dolph9
dolph9's picture

If you work on America, you are the sucker.

Now, I am working, but at least I can admit I'm the sucker.

Why these people want to spend their lives on cramped planes in the air, attending to miserable businessmen and rowdy families going on meaningless cross country trips is simply beyond me.

Why don't they pop out a few babies and apply for welfare?  At least the ghetto queens know the score and have this figured out.

I know you guys don't want to admit this.  You'll fight it with every ounce of your propagandized brains.  But the ghetto queens are the superior to these people applying to be flight attendants.  If you live like a little monarch and somebody else is doing the work, obviously you have figured out the system to your advantage.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 15:23 | 3089853 Freddie
Freddie's picture

We are serfs.  At least some of us serfs do not have TV or watch any of Hollywood's shit.  If you do then you are supporting them disarming you.

If you watch TV (pay for cable or sat TV) or Hollywood's crap - you are as bad as the overlords are and you support them.

Here is *******g reality by Ann Barnhardt,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iq0rxziwC_c

Sun, 12/23/2012 - 05:23 | 3091026 OldPhart
OldPhart's picture

Everytime that lady speaks I get wood.  At my age, a rarity, usually requiring the splint.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 15:12 | 3089842 swmnguy
swmnguy's picture

They'll have to sift through a lot of applications to find the next Deltalina.  There's something about getting a finger wagged in your face by a hot redhead with enough collagen in her lips fill a bike tire.

Sat, 12/22/2012 - 15:30 | 3089862 knukles
knukles's picture

Simply sit quietly, terrified and your stewbitch will be by momentarily to handcuff you to your seat, bitchez.

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