Retirement-Off, Dow Breaks 13,000 (The Wrong Way)

Tyler Durden's picture


They said it could never happen again, but it just did (after some spirited defense). Millions of retiring boomers were just silenced (and sent back to work) by the slump (down triple digits) in the Dow Jones Industrial Average back below its magical 13,000 level. WWBBD?



Your rating: None

- advertisements -

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.
Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:13 | 3099189 stant
stant's picture

wheres my dow i mean gold 10,000 hat

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:16 | 3099206 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Is Kevin Henry on vacation?

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:25 | 3099236 Richard Chesler
Richard Chesler's picture

Any boomer "fully invested" in stocks deserves to be vaporized.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:44 | 3099290 economics9698
economics9698's picture

Kramer is bullish. 

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:49 | 3099307 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

Can't believe people are missing out on this buying opportunity.  Can we use iTunes cards to buy stocks???

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 14:26 | 3099429 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Don't worry anyone...these markets are so thin and such an epic joke that even a minor league piker propagandist like Weisenthal can move them with a barely decipherable article that's hearsay about, and I quote Joe Weasel-fail, "SCOTT BROWN'S BOTTOM."

We knew Joe Weisenthal was a d-list propagandist. Some may be surprised to learn that he's a twink that's heavily lusting after Scott Brown's "bear" bottom (Weisenthal is day dreaming right now about it being a power bottom).

Bears and Twinks
Thu, 12/27/2012 - 14:29 | 3099441 Middle_Finger_Market
Middle_Finger_Market's picture

I liked Joe at first...then the liking began to fade, agreed. 

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 14:28 | 3099435 The trend is yo...
The trend is your friend's picture

Be careful of the PPT, i see some bidding in PCLN and AMZN

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:40 | 3099272 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

He's cramping but the trainer is gonna tape him up and plop him in front of the terminal for the second half.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:46 | 3099297 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

Don't forget the tampon.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:27 | 3099239 natty light
natty light's picture


Thu, 12/27/2012 - 14:04 | 3099366 candyman
candyman's picture

BFD, I'm sick of this market is collapsing talk because of the FC. Tthe market is flat since August.  We need a real fuck^# downturn to get these politicians working. oooH "fear intensifies" and we are only off 13 on the spoos.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 14:14 | 3099398 JPM Hater001
JPM Hater001's picture

Hat?  Where is the Pink elephants trunk?  It's time to celebrate.  Meet me at 4:20.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 14:18 | 3099411 Larry Dallas
Larry Dallas's picture

"Millions of retiring boomers were just silenced (and sent back to work)..."

Where? What work? I'm sure at least part those same millions would want a job.

Millions of retiring boomers were just silenced (and forced to collect disability)...

Fixed it for ya!

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 17:21 | 3099867 Bad Attitude
Bad Attitude's picture

"Where? What work?"

Walmart. It's indoors with heating/air conditioning. It beats shoveling porcine excrement in the hot sun.

And, Walmart sells ammo!

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 21:28 | 3100429 doggings
doggings's picture

haha love that video, funny as.. from the time of the big silver run if I remember right.

but we are now teetering on the edge of  SellTheFuckingBounce territory

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:20 | 3099191 camaro68ss
camaro68ss's picture

The horror..... O the horror...

O be one bernake, your our only hope, you must print faster.

bernake- "im given it all shes got captain."

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:44 | 3099292 Thomas
Thomas's picture

The humor...oh, the humor...

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:15 | 3099193 Flounder
Flounder's picture

All will be resolved once AMZN starts paying a 4% quarterly dividend.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:15 | 3099195 Super Broccoli
Super Broccoli's picture

well it's going back up don't worry :-)

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:15 | 3099196 Stoploss
Stoploss's picture

IDK, but the intergalactic, massively rare, metallic chemical element is responding.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:15 | 3099197 Cursive
Cursive's picture

Memo to CNBS:  Get the Dow 10,000 hats out of storage for 2013.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:15 | 3099200 Debeachesand Je...
Debeachesand Jerseyshores's picture

Time to cash in any profits from stocks etc before the sunset of the Bush Tax Cuts.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:16 | 3099203 muppet_master
muppet_master's picture

yes "retirement"

quick everyone, BUY INTO THE PONZI SCHEME = you can "retire" with illnesses. LOL !!

ahhh, where is MADOFF WHEN YOU NEED HIM ??  ROFLMAO !!

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:16 | 3099204 Toolshed
Toolshed's picture


The obvious answer - Ctrl-P.......all the way to the gallows baby!!

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:21 | 3099220 I Got Worms
I Got Worms's picture

Benny B: "Release the Kraken!!"

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:39 | 3099268 camaro68ss
camaro68ss's picture

Kraken? Is this the latest printing model?

It prints 2x faster then before!!!

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 14:02 | 3099356 XitSam
XitSam's picture

Bernanke: How many zeros will fit on a dollar bill?

Yellen: At the current size, approximately fifty.

Bernanke: That's not enough. What if we make the zeros smaller?

Yellen: If the zeros are too small, people won't know what they are spending.

Bernanke: What if we make all bills the same, redeemable for one loaf of bread.

Yellen: Bread redeemable for bread! Brilliant!

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 15:11 | 3099549 saturn
saturn's picture

Somebody could try to arm themselvez with old enough bread!

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 17:18 | 3099855 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

utter nonsense! Just like greeting cards with piezoelectric speakers they should ANNOUNCE how many zero's are on the bill!

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 17:16 | 3099850 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

It's got a dozen ethernet cables for tentacles and on each end a laughing Krugman face spitting out billions per minute of FRN's!

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:18 | 3099208 Banksters
Banksters's picture

The pension/retirement funds are seed money for the ponzi.    They won't get shit for retirement.   

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:18 | 3099212 pine_marten
pine_marten's picture

Retirement savings?  Dead man walking.  Inflation & taxation will devour what the prudent have set aside.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 15:13 | 3099553 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

Kind of...  the prudent are setting aside guns, ammo, food, and a myriad of other things that seem to be going up in scarcity and price...  (faster than inflation).  The writing has been on the wall for quite a while to get out what you can from the system...  and that your retirement is nothing but dangling meat in the shark tank.

Prudence doesn't exist in a vacuum...  nor does it remain constant...  the rules of yesteryear have nothing to do with the rules (and risk) of today.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:19 | 3099213 yogibear
yogibear's picture

"They said it could never happen again" 

Who is "They"? Consider the source of the statement. What interest do "They" have in making such a statement.

Someone in real estate also said back in the early 80's also stated rates would never drop below 12%.  What happened?


Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:19 | 3099216 Super Broccoli
Super Broccoli's picture

nah ... going to settle around 13055 tonight. Dropping to 12975 tommorow. Then Obama and Boehner magicaly find an agreement and it goes thru the roof again !

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 14:00 | 3099351 PeeramidIdeologies
PeeramidIdeologies's picture

Yep, the downhill hill run is nearly done...

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:20 | 3099218 surf0766
surf0766's picture

Who gives a rats ass about the boomers.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:31 | 3099250 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

I care as much about them as they care about us.... ZERO!!!!

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:21 | 3099222 TheMayor
TheMayor's picture

Get the truth!

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:24 | 3099229 Waterfallsparkles
Waterfallsparkles's picture

Just a way to scare the few remaining people out of the Market forever.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:25 | 3099230 emersonreturn
emersonreturn's picture

'they only care about the Dow...'  some politicans will do anything to get their way.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:25 | 3099231 razorthin
razorthin's picture

Retirement off?  Not mine.  Positioned in miners and global resources.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:27 | 3099238 orangegeek
orangegeek's picture

Dow Jones Weekly has been toyed with for some time to keep it up.


It's going to be interesting to see Q4 results.  It isn't going to be pretty.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:27 | 3099240 dobermangang
dobermangang's picture

Buy guns and ammo.  That's what everybody else seems to be doing.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 15:24 | 3099584 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

don't forget your pmags

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 17:25 | 3099880 Freddie
Freddie's picture

What PMags? What ammo? What guns?  I wonder how many mags MagPul can make per day?   They are probably running flat out. Lancer and Troy too.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 17:56 | 3099961 GCT
GCT's picture

Hell if your buying pmags right now your crazy.  Bought mine long before all this AWB started.  Fools are paying alot of bucks fror all these scare tactics.  Hmmm maybe the gov did this on purpose to make the retail sales look better after everything else looked like shit.  Guys tell the world we are going to ban AWB and all gear and they will go out and pay stupid prices for this stuff.  Problem solved with these miserable retail sale numbers!   LOLOL

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 18:02 | 3099975 The Joker
The Joker's picture

...and your silver bullets.

Thu, 12/27/2012 - 13:27 | 3099241 muppet_master
muppet_master's picture

"THEY" said

it could NEVER happen again (dow below 13k) THEY = the stupid "REPORTERS" ?? LOL !!

djia @ 13k, DOWN -4.7% from Oct 2012 high of 13.6k...= OMG !!! ITS THE END OF THE WORLD...bc the ponzi scheme is down -4.7% from its high....

NEVER MIND that it got pumped up more than 100% since 6.6k on 3-2009 by raping the 99% with debt + inflation...

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!