Obama Speaks Again

Tyler Durden's picture


No, it isn't the first time Obama has spoken on the Fiscal Cliff, and more importantly, the debt ceiling, which no matter what happens today appears set to remain unresolved as part of today's 60 day stopgap deal, if indeed one materializes. It won't be the last. There will be, however, much hope, optimism, and scapegoating, as always.

As a reminder, here are the rules of the drinking game - every time someone, in this case Obama, says:

  • "optimistic", do 1 shot;
  • "not optimistic" - 2 shots;
  • "cautiously optimistic" - 3 shots;
  • "guardedly optimistic" - 4 shots;
  • "encouraged" - 5 shots
  • "hopeful" - 10 shots
  • "fair" - 15 shots
  • And, naturally, "Bush's fault" - chug

Clip below:

Your rating: None

- advertisements -

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.
Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:31 | 3109662 Boilermaker
Boilermaker's picture

Champagne tonight, BITCHEZ!!!!

I only make $399,999 per year! 

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:34 | 3109684 knukles
knukles's picture


And Mr.Smith and Mrs Smith both make $399,999.99 and file separately, Bitchez

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:35 | 3109696 CrockettAlmanac.com
CrockettAlmanac.com's picture

Can we hear Garbo talk instead?

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:46 | 3109754 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Let the Reindeer Games commence!

Hark, the gilded bullshit flies, fa la la la la, la la la la!

Kabuki Theater of The Worst Kind, Bitchez Tue, 12/11/2012 - 12:40 | 


"Let me state this clearly, yet again, as many here and elsewhere have as well:  This is all theater. The fiscal cliff is a non-issue. Both "different" parties will agree on something, if they haven't done so already, that manages to screw over the largest % of actually productive businesses and people in the U.S., soon.


Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:53 | 3109851 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

"We are going to solve this problem in steps. "

Translation: We haven't done our job (even though I just gave everyone raises) so we are going kick the can down the road again. Only seeing as we have pretty much run out of road, each time we kick the can, it will not go quite as far. "

What a joke.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:58 | 3109907 pupton
pupton's picture

Each time they kick the can its weight doubles, while the boot gets smaller.  One day that can is going to be the one doing the kicking.  That's why we "prep" with guns, grub and gold (silver).

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 15:12 | 3109980 XitSam
XitSam's picture

Who knew that Zeno would still be relevant in today's economics?

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 15:02 | 3109926 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture



"We are going to ensure that more blood is extracted from the masses, and implement something to save the Banking/WallStreet/Defense/BigPharma&HealthCare complex from any cuts (let alone not see their taxpayer provided trillions in subsidies increased dramatically), because Deep Capture is here to stay, and that's how Deep Capture rolls bitchez. Happy New Year!"

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 15:08 | 3109956 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

Like yours better! Just fired my political translator.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 15:10 | 3109969 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

In KronyKomradeKapitalism, Fiscal Cliff Tosses You Off Ledge!

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:57 | 3109876 Michaelwiseguy
Michaelwiseguy's picture

I'm literally board out of my skull with the repetitive talking points. I can see his lips moving but I know nothing new under the Sun is coming out of his mouth. That's why I have the TV on mute and am listening to Alex Jones internet radio during BO's speech. Only 10 hours till hopelessness, can't come soon enough.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 15:01 | 3109922 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

TruthInSunshine said:

This is all theater.

Indeed it is. It leads me to wonder what this lavish production of The Cankicker Suite is supposed to divert our attention away from.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:54 | 3109858 stocktivity
stocktivity's picture

I can't believe the market is holding gains listening to this bullshit!

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:38 | 3109716 Boilermaker
Boilermaker's picture

I'm not joke that's the HARD SCRABBLE LIFE!!!

You can only bathe in Cristal like...twice a week!  The fucking HORROR!!!

How am I going to get by???

Let's see...what's the average salary on Wall Street / Manhattan / DC lobbyist....OH MY.  That's coincidental.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:42 | 3109744 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

no shots for "framework"? really?

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:40 | 3109725 Pool Shark
Pool Shark's picture


And Mr. and Mrs. Shark lost all their income in a tragic boating accident.


Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:56 | 3109873 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

I am very sorry to hear that you and yours suffered something similar to what has happened to Mr. & Mrs. Bearing.  Well, so it goes, such is life.

Oh, you wrote INCOME!  Well, that too...  Very sorry, Messrs. at .gov.  I mean that sincerely.

Phew!  Obama JUST finished.  I am starting to feel better already!

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:58 | 3109896 1100-TACTICAL-12
1100-TACTICAL-12's picture

I have noticed the people who buy into this bullshit, have a different/weird look about them hard to explain. Might be a gene pool thing.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 15:03 | 3109928 knukles
knukles's picture

Fuck no, mind control.
Monarch mind control, excess experimental pharmaceuticals of highly neurotoxic nature, RFID implants in cerebral cortex, HAARP waves and Chemtrails.

They're convinced he's not really the Anti-Christ.

And believe me, I know about this stuff.....

(drooling, sliding onto floor in puddle)

There is something the fuck wrong here....

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:51 | 3109834 Stoploss
Stoploss's picture

Those stupid fucking idiots behind him dont have a fucking clue they are so so retarded.


That's Amerikka Folks, better get used to it.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 15:04 | 3109940 knukles
knukles's picture

Being used and liking it.

Probably all got a new phone for agreeing to a few minutes for special augumented wh tour...

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:33 | 3109680 stocktivity
stocktivity's picture

They're just going to kick the can further down the road ....It's all Bullshit!!!!

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 15:03 | 3109934 pupton
pupton's picture

Each kick takes more effort than the last, and doesn't go as far as the last, requiring another kick sooner than expected.  This will cycle down until there is no energy left to kick the can.  That process is accellerating.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 15:20 | 3110029 FreedomGuy
FreedomGuy's picture

Congress is not structured to make hard decisions. They do the easy decisions like national eyeball cancer awareness day and saying yes to all spending. Without any Constitutuoonal limits on power and spending and taxing they will continue on this path.

So, fire, smoke, heat, bluster, hand wringing, tense sound bites, etc.; it is all cheap theater and means nothing. The curves will go exponential and we will collapse as the political class dithers.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:46 | 3109792 Snakeeyes
Snakeeyes's picture

Nothing will be solved as the US slides down to the steaming cesspool in the valley.


Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:55 | 3109864 zerozulu
zerozulu's picture

Kick the can. bitches.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:56 | 3109868 Zap Powerz
Zap Powerz's picture

I wish one of those reporters had the balls to ask this douche bag "who is making all the money off the US debt?" and a follow up question: "Why should a private bank make billions of dollars a year from US debt?" and then a final question: "Do taxpayers even know that a huge portion of their taxes go to a private bank to pay the interest on the debt?" 

No Fed, no debt.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 18:04 | 3110728 ball-and-chain
ball-and-chain's picture

I don't feel bad for the rich.

I'm into class warfare.

They ought to pay more.


Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:32 | 3109666 in-Credible Banker
in-Credible Banker's picture

I am going to shoot beer for this one.  I gotta go to a party later on after all!!

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:43 | 3109759 Iriestx
Iriestx's picture

Go Bills!

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:50 | 3109818 in-Credible Banker
in-Credible Banker's picture

I hope they are good again within my lifetime.  Today was a first step.



Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:32 | 3109667 pods
pods's picture

Damn, I will have to keep track.  Can't do that many shots at work!


Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:35 | 3109692 Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

One of the lucky ones.

I can't because I can't afford booze.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:32 | 3109669 YesWeKahn
YesWeKahn's picture

don't eat your own tongue.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:32 | 3109671 knukles
knukles's picture


He speaks.
I feel better already...

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:59 | 3109903 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

He just stopped speaking.

I feel better already!


Happy New Years, Bitchez!

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 15:07 | 3109953 knukles
knukles's picture

Happy New Years, DoChen
May the Joy of the Promises come true anew.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:32 | 3109673 sbenard
sbenard's picture

"Here comes the orator, with his flood of words, and his drop of reason." Benjamin Franklin

It's the Charlatan in Chief. All bow in abeyance!

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:33 | 3109674 YesWeKahn
YesWeKahn's picture

One shot, it's over. manhood has some limit.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:33 | 3109679 Ralph Spoilsport
Ralph Spoilsport's picture

Appropriate music while waiting for Lord Vader, er, Obama....



Mon, 12/31/2012 - 15:04 | 3109937 Panafrican Funk...
Panafrican Funktron Robot's picture


This performance seems more indicitive of the situation we find ourselves in today.  

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 15:11 | 3109979 Ralph Spoilsport
Ralph Spoilsport's picture

Yeah that's some real crap in that there video. WTF?

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:34 | 3109681 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture
"Obama Speaks Again"

(He reads the stuff they put on his teleprompter again).

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:36 | 3109682 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Do nothing, tell people you're 'optimistic', and tread water at 10 year ago levels and believe it's 'up'....gee the people are very easy to fool.

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:34 | 3109683 Zer0head
Zer0head's picture

for some reason i have .gov blocked so I will read the comments and watch mr. market

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:35 | 3109685 virgilcaine
virgilcaine's picture

VC At the trading station ready to hit sell on all in

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:35 | 3109686 TerminalDebt
TerminalDebt's picture

He's late

didn't expect him to be late

Mon, 12/31/2012 - 14:38 | 3109711 Taterboy
Taterboy's picture

The media will say he's fashionably late.

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!