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Two Covers To Commemorate The End Of The 112th Congress

Tyler Durden's picture


Presenting two covers to commemorate what may be the most dysfunctional Congress in the history of the US: the 112th, whose final official day is today. The only Congress that will be worse is the 113th, then the 114th and so on.

First, from Bloomberg:

And from the Economist:


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Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:32 | 3118423 jekyll island
jekyll island's picture

I think a plane smashing into the World Trade Center would be a better depiction of the 112th congress.  And that is being kind. 

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:35 | 3118431 Zer0head
Zer0head's picture


try  Demons

(f Bloomberg)

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:42 | 3118466 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Bloomberg's just mad that there wasn't far more free monies.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:02 | 3118550 Jay Gould Esq.
Jay Gould Esq.'s picture

Bill Banzai does far better work.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:26 | 3118630 tip e. canoe
tip e. canoe's picture

my thoughts exactly.   looks like someone at the E-con-omist has been lurking...

in an ideal world, they would have hired Bill to do the cover, but why bother when you can rip it off and call it your own?

time to take it to next level...


Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:42 | 3118670 old naughty
old naughty's picture

The next level, you say?

Let's close the Congress. Let the States run their own. Save the pay-outs. And it will not get any worse than 2012.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:48 | 3118703 machineh
machineh's picture

Don't just close it, demolish it.

It's more toxic than Chernobyl.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:06 | 3118565 IvyMike
IvyMike's picture

Does anybody really expect mature decision-making from a species that becomes more juvenile every generation?

Maturity just isn't attractive.

Oh, and don't forget, human brains are shrinking.

If Modern Humans Are So Smart, Why Are Our Brains Shrinking?

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:11 | 3118583 RockyRacoon
RockyRacoon's picture

In that case, the Geniac would be the size of Saturn to equal the computing power of my microwave oven.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:21 | 3118614 IvyMike
IvyMike's picture

Skull sizes progressively becoming smaller is a mark of domestication.

It happens to dogs, horses, cows, humans, and the other several dozen domesticable species that can survive being caged. (And yes, State Society, a.k.a. Civilization, is a zoo.)

BTW, the chief psychological symptoms of domestication are stupidity and docility.

In other words, humans are becoming progressively poodle-ized.


Peter J. Wilson (1991) The? Domestication of the Human Species. Yale University Press.

Jack Goody. The Domestication of the Savage Mind. Cambridge University Press.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:46 | 3118684 Al Huxley
Al Huxley's picture

That's an interesting take, worth considering (although impact is likely longer-term).  William Calvin provides a fairly in-depth and interesting look at the causes and effectives of species juvenilization in The Ascent of Mind. 

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:50 | 3118716 machineh
machineh's picture

If skulls are getting smaller, why are tits getting bigger?

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:55 | 3118742 koncaswatch
koncaswatch's picture

Self explanatory,

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 14:33 | 3119375 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

Store bought titties?

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:00 | 3118757 Blano
Blano's picture

Who cares why??

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:13 | 3118799 WTFRLY
WTFRLY's picture

bioaccumulation of hormones in the food and maybe hormone imbalances caused by things in food

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 13:08 | 3118995 Jonas Parker
Jonas Parker's picture

or more plastic surgeons looking to... ahh... expand their practices.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:13 | 3118797 tango
tango's picture

My reply - if every single member of Congress is evil, an idiot and on the payroll of the financial big boys, why not run yourself?  Isn't this supposed to be a people's body? The vast majority of politicians (particularly from rural states) were once regular folks who wanted to make a change (until they got to DC).  IMHO, many see the future and  are simply going through the (e)motions.  Ron Paul said we were too far gone and many are now losing interest in a war where winning is impossible without default - something no one can admit publicly.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:02 | 3118553 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

I'd go with fucktards

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:09 | 3118575 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

I agree but it is hard to populate the picture with something that can clearly be labeled as "Fucktards." Maybe a bunch of horses asses all over the place? Babies are too sweet.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:23 | 3118620 Osmium
Osmium's picture

I'm kinda partial to Fuck Sticks

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:48 | 3118702 Al Huxley
Al Huxley's picture

Hey, no problem.  What you do inside your own home is your business.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:16 | 3118599 Stuart
Stuart's picture

I'm somewhat surprised.  Those covers are actually really good.  For mainstream media to now get fed up, this is saying ALOT.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:14 | 3118801 Hobbleknee
Hobbleknee's picture

I'm pretty sure all babies are aborted on sight in DC.  The Constitution says so.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:44 | 3118921 Chupacabra-322
Chupacabra-322's picture

A picture of the Criminals in Orange jumpsuits would have been surfice. 

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 14:46 | 3119440 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Artistic genius!

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:59 | 3118751 Grinder74
Grinder74's picture

Where oh where is that infamous Japanese airline pilot, from the Clancy novel Executive Orders, when we need him?

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:32 | 3118425 CPL
CPL's picture

Nice of them to catch up 7 years after the fact.


Fuck MSM and their printed fish wrap.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:43 | 3118470 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

I think both of them are only mad because they didn't screw over the country far enough for their liking.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:43 | 3118475 Aziz
Aziz's picture

Useless MSM. It'd be good as expensive toilet paper, yet the ink comes off on your ass. Totally useless.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:56 | 3118524 flacon
flacon's picture

US Dollars are a good cheap alternative and the ink stays on the paper when you wipe. 

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:40 | 3118664 Byte Me
Byte Me's picture

Absorbancy is crap though..

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:05 | 3118562 Joe Davola
Joe Davola's picture

Good to see the media is giving us the details of the problems confronting the country, not just playing it up as a reality show.  Except the scripts for the reality shows are more believable.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:53 | 3118515 Stoploss
Stoploss's picture

I think if i were a congress critter, i would be on lugey watch big time.

The first place the payroll tax hike will hit is the wallets of waitstaff and cooks, since this tax hike

now with holds the only extra cash to go in the gas tank to get back and fourth to work. LOL!!

Excellent job lawmakers, excellent job.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:58 | 3118536 odatruf
odatruf's picture

So once rates go down, they can never go back up no matter how ill considered the 'holiday' is?

That's the kind of thinking that gets us into this mess.


Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:17 | 3118822 tango
tango's picture

But as Tyler has pointed out repeatedly, those in the lower ladder of income can receive massive benefits to supplement their low pay.  Everything from food stamps to housing allowances to no income tax to "free" health insurance to child care.  If we are going to have a Ponzi system (SS) at least we should fund it on a semi-rational level and end the current situation in which the average recipient receives tens of thousands more than they contribute (same with Medicare).

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:34 | 3118430 fourchan
fourchan's picture

number two is bonzai worthy.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:35 | 3118437 Sofa King
Sofa King's picture

Pretty insulting comming from two piece of shit Socialist trash rags like that.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:36 | 3118442 otto skorzeny
otto skorzeny's picture

really-I think it's more of the "it takes one to know one"

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:36 | 3118439 goldenrod
goldenrod's picture

In the meantime, Indian farmers rush to buy gold.  This is it, folks.  The train is leaving the station.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:38 | 3118447 asteroids
asteroids's picture

That cover is too funny.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:39 | 3118451 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Love the short pants on Bohner. Those knees are to die for. :)

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:49 | 3118500 pods
pods's picture

Maybe WB could do a redo with Boner wearing kneepads?

"You got a little something on your chin Mr. Speaker."


Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:58 | 3118534 Agent P
Agent P's picture


But what's up with the blackface mime?  That's a little too racist for my tastes.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:59 | 3118540 NoTTD
NoTTD's picture


Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:24 | 3118627 WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot
WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot's picture

+1 for Boehnerhosen. I'm usually too pissed when reading ZH to get a good laugh. Thanks for making today the exception.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:40 | 3118454 TerminalDebt
TerminalDebt's picture

Not like anybody is paying any attention

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:43 | 3118478 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Yea who cares? Stawks r up!

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:40 | 3118455 forrestdweller
forrestdweller's picture


Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:41 | 3118462 THE DORK OF CORK
THE DORK OF CORK's picture

Its such as bore.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:43 | 3118471 TWSceptic
TWSceptic's picture

Babies? hmm so we're comparing sociopaths with innocent not yet brainwashed creatures now?

Europe? Where's the austerity in the US? At least Europe has some.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:51 | 3118502 The Final Countdown
The Final Countdown's picture

To me, the notion of America becoming Europa is one big mindfuck.

Europe wants to go federalist just like the US, while the US is going the direction of Europe: an unbalanced broken system completely unable to change direction. Economically, both are treading water, and neither has any prospect of getting out of the hole they are digging for themselves.

Who needs more proof that 'Western civilization' is fucked?

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:43 | 3118476 Stoploss
Stoploss's picture

We need Banzai to give us a proof of a patriot holding an elephant gun, aimed at the elephant in the room.

Looks like the GOP is one trigger pull away from oblivion as it is.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:44 | 3118479 overmedicatedun...
overmedicatedundersexed's picture

today I commemorate the congress by changing my registration from republican to libetarian on the plantation no more.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:49 | 3118499 Rainman
Rainman's picture

No...reject all political handles. That is how your judgement becomes managed. Partisan atheism is always the right choice

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:50 | 3118505 pods
pods's picture

I wanted to start an Anarchy Party, but by definition, anyone who would join was excluded.


Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:02 | 3118548 NoTTD
NoTTD's picture

Several yearsa go, I tried to start the Libertarian-Anachist Party ("LAP").  Same result.  Plus, the first meeting was fire bombed.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:06 | 3118564 kridkrid
kridkrid's picture

I wouldn't want to be a part of any organization that would accept me as a member.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 15:11 | 3119549 Cathartes Aura
Cathartes Aura's picture

until one re-cognises it's the whole System thats rotten, beyond any Party-ing, then looking for solutions within the System will continue.

just close the door, walk away, no second thoughts. . .

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:45 | 3118485 Manipuflation
Manipuflation's picture

What would Bagehot say?

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:15 | 3118811 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

"Of course, banks are not the only lenders in our economies. The current crisis owes a lot to the non-bank

financial sector – funds, conduits, SIVs, securities dealers, and so on.  But the excessive leverage and 

maturity transformation in the shadow banking system was in general predicated on the plentiful 

availability of credit on too-easy terms from the commercial banking system.  Up to a point, the same 

goes for the abundant liquidity in asset markets that preceded the crisis.  Of course, persistently strong 

demand for financial assets – crudely, rising prices – created liquidity.  But, beyond that, the willingness 

and terms on which ‘market-makers’ and traders underpinned liquidity depended on generous access to 

credit for financing inventory and positions.  And the ultimate private sector providers of such credit are 

always the commercial banks"

Or maybe that's Steve Keen. ;)   (actually Paul Tucker from BoE to the Bank of Japan Lulz)

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:47 | 3118491 adr
adr's picture

I would say that putting a guillotine in the middle of the senate floor, with the caption "It's Time" would be the most appropriate cover.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:53 | 3118517 Zer0head
Zer0head's picture

speaking of guillotines

Two centuries after handkerchiefs were dipped in the blood of the beheaded French king Louis XVI, scientists believe they have proved one such rag kept as a revolutionary souvenir contains his bloodstains.
Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:56 | 3118530 SilverDOG
SilverDOG's picture


YES . 

With the Constitution inscribed upon the blade.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:54 | 3118738 machineh
machineh's picture

'sic semper tyrannis' would do ... and would be legible in the YouTube videos!

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:47 | 3118494 youngman
youngman's picture

Yeah but what does MAD Magazine have for its cover????  That is where the real news is....

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:52 | 3118509 Tsunami Wave
Tsunami Wave's picture

What does playboy have to say? Honestly their political commentary isn't bad, I'm curious.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:54 | 3118518 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

A caricature of the Senator from Tokyo Prefecture.

If you can draw it well enough, you get a free art course!


Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:50 | 3118504 WhiteNight123129
WhiteNight123129's picture

What is going on, William Banzai works for both Bloomberg and The Economist now?

Zerohedge should go in print edition with the best-off blogs and links of the month.



Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:52 | 3118507 q99x2
q99x2's picture

When it hits the magazine covers the end is nigh.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:52 | 3118512 forrestdweller
forrestdweller's picture

they are all members of the one-percent-gang, or candidate members.

they will never do what is good fot the country, they will do what is good for the gang.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:53 | 3118516 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

They never state the true point, they just state the talking point. They are divided because Obama and the Dems are spending us into oblivion and the Republicans are losing the battle which turns to them folding. They have no effective speakers. This is by design. Any bonehead knows that spending yourself into insolvency is unwise and no one is conveying that message. Get used to this. I say just let them keep going. Give everyone everything and collapse the damn thing. 

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:54 | 3118519 Salon
Salon's picture

Please spread this link far and wide if you want to know the game plan for the new American Revolution. Assymetric warfare can succeed and does not require centralized command.

 Our rulers want to disarm us peasants. We cant be trusted.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 13:48 | 3119157 Nobody For President
Nobody For President's picture

404 - File not found

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 10:56 | 3118523 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

WTF is going on with WTI?

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:11 | 3118580 forrestdweller
forrestdweller's picture

that is what my parents taught me; try not to spend money you don't have, because you are gonna have to pay it back one day.

but i guess that is not what everybody learned.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 13:04 | 3118976 RangerRiley
RangerRiley's picture

I believe it is your parent's generation that is running congress now? When they said you can't spend money you don't have they were referring to "you" not them.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:15 | 3118597 mcl2177
mcl2177's picture

I think Obama is much more Eastern Eurpoean than a French Socialist.  I would have shaved his head and put a Gorbachev birth mark on his head.  Boner is the French Socialist he has the same dumbfounded look François Hollande has.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:43 | 3118676 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

How does one stop "The Chocolate Revolution"?

I've got my flowers ready. ;)

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:18 | 3118602 Salon
Salon's picture

The links I posted above were broken within thirty minutes of my viewing them. It talks about how thousands of small cells operating autonomously with the same overall goals do not need a central command.

Also apparently I cant order anything from

Oh well. I guess the American Spring was called off. Proly due to weather lol.

Everybody go home.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:29 | 3118624 Aurora Ex Machina
Aurora Ex Machina's picture

At least try not to show your total lack of computer skills. You added a /comment to the end of your URL, thus rendering it to a 404, since you've probably either logged out or the site won't parse you straight to comments.

It still works, so it's not the NSA blocking it. It's also total fantasy, and utter bollocks. If you need that kind of itch scratched, at least read something with a bit of analysis and thought behind it: try 5GW, here.




In future use this site to check if you're being a simpleton or not.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:47 | 3118697 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

What you said (and learn to recognize when you're being suckered into an ad).



Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:59 | 3118737 Aurora Ex Machina
Aurora Ex Machina's picture

Oh, indubitably my dear chap.

Malforming your own blogspam is just too much not to scratch, however. (And that site is hardly white-listed, meaning my visit adds no revenue).

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 14:53 | 3119474 toomanyfakecons...
toomanyfakeconservatives's picture

The Skilluminati website has some fresh material, but to me it does not invalidate the Bob Owens article or explain why it's fantasy. It may well be fantasy, but stories about bullets flying in collapse or revolution scenarios always get people fired up. Many people believe the Great Sandy Hook false-flag gun grab photo-op is the end of guns as we know them. The gun market is at an all-time frenzy. Certainly the lone wolf threat-excuse fits a federal grab at small arms.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:46 | 3118686 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

They misunderstand the ballet of hormones and internal controls that regulate cell's not nearly the great analogy to "spontaneous order" you might think.


Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:20 | 3118612 Herdee
Herdee's picture

I'm keeping an eye on who and what entities are being added to the list that is going to force foreign banks,domestic banks,oil firms and others to trade their "swaps" in the OTC derivitives market out in the open with the CFTC.Trillions of dollars of these derivitives will now be forced to trade under a regulated entity.All because of Dodd-Frank.I expect a lot of volatility which happens to come in the same timeframe as this debt ceiling debacle and other major economic events like the devaluation of the Yen.Maybe manipulation in the Gold and Silver Markets(and others) will have to be unwound under the new Dodd-Frank rules?The Banks in New York will no longer have the secrecy to move their dirty derivitives work over to foreign Banks in Canada,England and Europe.All foreign Banks must sign up.I'm watching for a big move up in Gold in the next month or two as scams by Central Banks and Governments are forced to unwind.Trillions of formerly unregulated derivitives is sure lot to try to control.And the big part is the increased collateral that needs to be put up by Banks in order to try to continue their scams.Like Warren Buffet said about these things,these mass destructive elements need to be brought under control.It always helps to be a respected investor and good friend of Obama.

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 11:41 | 3118666 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

The whole point of the derivatives is that they can build notional mountains from relative molehills of collateral (as in almost no underlying real assets whatsoever...purely fictional side-bets).

I don't think one more captured exchange frightens the Too Big to Dissolve who have had months to prep for this eventuality.

You think Dodd and Barney weren't taking dictation as to what would or would not construe real hardship to their "Geppetos"?

There are rules about how much the gubbamint will cover for them (too much) but there's no real enforcement mechanism and they're one more emergency bill from reversing anything in that bill anyway. Seriously, don't ever cry for Wall St; they're covered. Always.


Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:43 | 3118919 toomanyfakecons...
toomanyfakeconservatives's picture

These covers are great.


Instead of a French beret, Obama should have Scottish golf cap. Didn't he just hit the links in Hawaii on another one of his vacations?

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 13:32 | 3119091 virgilcaine
virgilcaine's picture

A dull axe would work also, live on cspan ?

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 13:44 | 3119122 Uncle Zuzu
Uncle Zuzu's picture

America turns European?  Just last week, it was turning Hispanic.  So confusing.

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