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America's PhDs On Foodstamps

Tyler Durden's picture


When job hunting in one's field turns tough, college graduates may return to school for another degree (even in economics). But for some Americans, multiple degrees won't guarantee a job in their field (or even at the Fed) - or even keep them above the poverty level... Over the past few years, more and more highly educated people have turned to food stamps and other forms of welfare for help...



Source: OnlineColleges.net

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Tue, 01/08/2013 - 21:23 | 3134710 ZFiNX
ZFiNX's picture

Well this explain's why the adjunct profs at my public university are so damn shitty.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 21:32 | 3134723 ACP
ACP's picture

Even after they learn that their shitty-ass degree in International Relations or Sociology is completely useless these laziest of the laziest college grads still don't get a dose of reality because they immediately transition from govt subsidized education to govt subsidized living. Fucking pathetic - Golden Age of Dependency.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 21:44 | 3134773 Tijuana Donkey Show
Tijuana Donkey Show's picture

So, if your bi-racial, do you count as black, white, or whatever, or half for each? I need to know.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 21:51 | 3134786 Zer0head
Zer0head's picture

only 5000 or so janitors have PhD's

I was sure that University of Phoenix had more grads than that

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 22:02 | 3134835 economics9698
economics9698's picture

Yes we do!

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 00:13 | 3135109 Shocker
Shocker's picture

The problem is Food stamps are fine for a temporary basis, but they are becoming permanent solutions.

But with the job market so weak, and no real uptick seen, this will continue.

We need Jobs available to start fixing it.

Also, little lesson....don't go to College unless your getting a degree into something of value.




Wed, 01/09/2013 - 00:51 | 3135244 caconhma
caconhma's picture

I am living near Boston, Mass.

We had a community college to teach idiots to read & write they have failed to learn at school. Now, it became the Framingham State University. Now, instructors who taught shit became professors teaching quantum mechanics and molecular bioscience. Incredible!

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 01:47 | 3135348 flacon
flacon's picture

Education vs. School of Hard Knocks. It's better than football. 

Local, State and Federal income tax I've paid since 2009..... = $0. I have not received any aid either. I'm all about Common Law, plus it benefited me to leave the good ol' US of A. Fuck that shit and their SIN TAX on earning my own keep - I'll just do it all back-door on the FREE MARKET thank you very much!  

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 05:38 | 3135656 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

Some janitors are millionaires next door
Unionized with pension
No boss brown nosing necessary
No politics
No face to face with stupid customers
No meetings
No commute traffic
No work to take home
No dress code
No stress
Time for golf or tennis in the mornings
Paid overtime
Quiet working environment to think alone
Access to many rooms

There was a ivy league janitor who graduated from columbia university for free by taking classes part time while working as a janitor there

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 08:06 | 3135763 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture



Most janitors are far more intellectual than your average PHD.....plus they possess a real skill set.

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 08:12 | 3135771 Oldballplayer
Oldballplayer's picture

I am executor for an estate.  That estate was held by a person who worked at a rep at the phone company.

Worth well over a million.  Mostly in CDs and savings accounts.

The person never had a credit card.  And never had any debt.

I was ashamed of my own good credit history when compared to hers.

You don't need a degree or a great job to become wealthy.  A liquid million is wealthy, right?

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 11:02 | 3136296 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

See it all the time...  one of the problems though is that cost-push inflation and economic deterioration don't occur evenly over the economy...  As a result, there is an incredibly perverse pay structure for many jobs.  In other words, jobs that benefit society the most and, all things considered, are the most productive, often times are paid less than menial positions in entrenched bureaucracies.  This type of differentiation is likely to become much less exacerbated as unfunded liabilities (e.g. retirement promises) are destroyed, but for the time being there are some absolutely perverse incentives for many workers...  often times there is little material difference between a job that costs an incredible amount of time, effort, and ingenuity and a job that entails purposefully sandbagging and otherwise performing at a subhuman level.  This is moral hazard.

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 11:38 | 3136504 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

Your wage is not determined by quality or value you add to society
It is determined by supply of like kind labor and the value add profits go to capitalists

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 14:37 | 3137263 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

Yes, and how's that working out for everyone?  I think we're all aware of the law of the jungle...  [at the very least, you must concede that the market is not perfectly and instantaneously efficient].

Further, determination of wage is vastly more complicated than simple supply and demand issues...  the real world does not present apples to apples comparisons of labor...  among other fundamental flaws with your thesis.

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 13:13 | 3136893 Iam_Silverman
Iam_Silverman's picture

" I'll just do it all back-door on the FREE MARKET thank you very much!"

Ouch!  Do you charge less if they lube-up first?

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 04:17 | 3135557 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

If you have a PHD....

and you can't come up with a idea... to not be a janitor...

but to put your brains to work...

that just means you have a high IQ but a very low EQ...

and this also shows how fucked up our education system is because I've seen a lot of people with a very high EQ and average IQ been kicked out of school and make something of themselves.


I remember the American movies where they said:


and if that means you should be a janitor or a foodstamp recipient...


maybe that's just all you can be...




Is a sad country...

Jezus... it's like India where they devide the population into casts...

well... YES WE CAN! I guess... I don't know where the CHANGE is but it's kind of sad...


Wed, 01/09/2013 - 05:43 | 3135657 Acet
Acet's picture

Interestingly, there was recently an article on the BBC news site about how graduates nowadays come out of school with an undeserved, excessive belief in their own self worth (to the point of narcisism) - http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-20756247

It's the whole "everybody is a unique flower" style of education that produces mediocre young adults who think they're the best thing since sliced bread and expect to be successfull without having to work for it.


Wed, 01/09/2013 - 06:52 | 3135679 tabasco71
tabasco71's picture

Didn't want to post today (working!) but you hit a nerve, damn you....

Solicitor friend of mine was trying to hire recently and got a bunch of shiny grad-automatrons walk through his door -all great at the gloss and asking for £70k starting salary, which astounded him, because nobody could answer his first question...

And his first question was... "what can you do that will make it worth me paying you that much?"

Only blank expressions ensued - they were probably all trying to recall scenes from Ally McBeal, although that wouldn't help much because whenever they were round a table they were either trying to have sex or drinking.

Basic lack of common sense, EQ, real world experience, or whatever you want to call it... it was lacking...

In a rising market, everyone can be a unique flower. In any other market, you need to add value. Rubber meet road.

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 08:36 | 3135795 hapless
hapless's picture

It bugs the shit out of me when people shift the vernacular to suit their own purpose.  Take meritocracy for example.

I recall a time when merit involved real, you know, accomplishment - building, inventing - that sort of shit - and not to some lame-ass "honor" conferred by one human being upon another.  Higher ed has co-opted the notion of merit and applied it to the bestowment of a piece of paper.

I'm beginning to wonder if the purpose of education is to render every single word in the English language meaningless.

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 06:04 | 3135676 merizobeach
merizobeach's picture

"maybe that's just all you can be..."  Rings true, and what a disgrace it is.

A friend of mine, upon completing his PhD (albeit in science), said it was the best investment he had ever made: he is now credentialed with the highest standard that exists, and all doors around the entire world are open for him.  Sounds good.  I, on the other hand, don't have a PhD, or any post-high school degree, but I've never found that to be an impediment when seeking a job.

Because the bottom line is competence, bitchez.  People with post-graduate degrees who seek government handouts, because they're incompetent or lazy, deserve anthrax on their cheques.  (I'll give them a pass, though, if their motive is to scam and bankrupt a terminally corrupt government).

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 10:22 | 3136057 sessinpo
sessinpo's picture

Maybe it was a typo mistake but I think you have that backwards.


Sudden Debt: " If you have a PHD.... and you can't come up with a idea... to not be a janitor... but to put your brains to work... that just means you have a high IQ but a very low EQ..."

One with a high IQ, theoretically would be more likely to put their brains to work to not be a janitor but be in a higher position. However, in my opinion, janitors are higher ranked then our politicians and bankers. On the other hand, the one with a high EQ, even with a PhD, would be the janitor bitching and complaining to everyone else that he/she shouldn't be a janitor because they have an PhD - usually liberal.

Maybe your statement is grammatically wrong and doesn't express your thought correctly.


But that is just me dissecting your statement in a logical fashion instead of emotional - IQ vs EQ.


I must admit I am biased. I have run circles around many graduates. They don't think critically. I find the majority of undergraduates and graduates have this problem. I generally favor two things: those that are quick to pick up on new procedures or concepts (without additional lengthy explanation, training, or retraining. And the go get it attitude, the ones that go beyond their specific job duties to learn more then they have to regarding the companies operations. Most jobs are repetitive monkey jobs anyway, including mine.


Wed, 01/09/2013 - 00:53 | 3135249 SgtSchultz
SgtSchultz's picture

What of the lowly bathroom attendant?

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 01:49 | 3135363 flacon
flacon's picture

Jon Corzine can wipe my ass!

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 01:58 | 3135378 SgtSchultz
SgtSchultz's picture

No tip!

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 05:46 | 3135665 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

500 people at the club 200 goes to the restroom
$1 tip per 4 during 2hours in the night =

$25 per hour cash= $40 hour salary wage

More than entry level ibanking analysts for hourly wage

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 05:50 | 3135667 merizobeach
merizobeach's picture

He'll have to pull his shaft out first.

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 07:33 | 3135728 smlbizman
smlbizman's picture

true story schultz....here you will finally know somethink.....i was at laural race track yrs ago...in the mens room...yes there was an attendant....when a black guy came in and the attendant started talking to him.....the black guy said, as only black guys can..........

"....man, aint nobody wanna to talk to the shit house man"

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 21:49 | 3134787 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

As far as I know (FWTW), if you are 25% Hispanic, well you are Hispanic!  In Hawaii, I believe the threshhold is 1/8th Native Hawaiian (to get the benefits).

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 22:39 | 3134921 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Hypodescent. 1/16 African American used to, by law, make you black. 

Hypodescent is not legal any more.

I think if you say you are a particular race, they have a hard time proving you are not. Knew a blonde haired, blue eyed, Cuban dude who got the full Hispanic ride scholarship to my Ph.D. program! 

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 22:54 | 3134956 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

I'm 1/16th female

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 23:08 | 3134983 ACP
ACP's picture

If you look at humans on the basis of chromosomes, men are actually 1/2 female.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 23:36 | 3135043 GOSPLAN HERO
GOSPLAN HERO's picture

Terms pertaining to one drop, based on “blood quantum,” said to measure blood quantity, include Mulatto (1/2 Negro), Quadroon (1/4 Negro), Octoroon (1/8 Negro) and so on.

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 00:56 | 3135258 tom a taxpayer
Wed, 01/09/2013 - 01:13 | 3135284 akak
akak's picture

I'm 1/2 Walloon, 1/4 Spittoon and 1/4 Loon myself.

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 01:51 | 3135369 flacon
flacon's picture

There are a lot of white African Americans who somehow don't qualify for slave status. Funny that.. and good for them. 

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 02:38 | 3135449 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

I'm 1/8 Monsoon, 1/4 Typhoon, 1/2 Balloon, and 1 Cartoon of descent. Very proud of my heritage...

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 07:46 | 3135741 GOSPLAN HERO
GOSPLAN HERO's picture

Maroon - a fugitive black slave of the West Indies and Guiana in the 17th and 18th centuries; also: a descendant of such a slave

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 23:51 | 3135079 3.7.77
3.7.77's picture

hmm, which half?

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 00:34 | 3135175 Hook Line and S...
Hook Line and Sphincter's picture

I'm reptilian from the waste up.

Equine from the waste down.

(at least that's what Bwarny Fwank told me)


Wed, 01/09/2013 - 00:47 | 3135230 Boondocker
Boondocker's picture

i think i need to throw up now...

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 01:45 | 3135354 Hook Line and S...
Hook Line and Sphincter's picture

Did I forget to show you the video of our KFCongressmen?


I know... they do look like turkey vultures

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 01:53 | 3135370 flacon
flacon's picture

Waste or Waist? I assume you meant waste, which translates to the anus which is your waste. Then again many Americans have waste at their MOUTH. Not saying it's you, but many of them do, like FREE JON CORZINE. 

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 04:34 | 3135589 Western
Western's picture

aye brother, free jc

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 23:57 | 3135090 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

I just use it for access to the public restrooms 

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 00:02 | 3135093 ToNYC
ToNYC's picture

What's not to like about blond-headed Sicilians because the Danes invaded a thousand years ago?  but I got a full-ride just because I was cool.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 22:44 | 3134939 Jack Burton
Jack Burton's picture

Yes I have a friend who is 1/8th native American. Recently he was taken on as a full member of the local tribe on their reservation. As a fully accepted native American he now gets a check from the tribe every month and the state gives him free hunting and fishing rights across the entire state of Minnesota. They take 1/8 now as full members, because otherwise the tribe is near to dying out. Sort of funny for a guy 1/2 Norwegian 1/4 Irish 1/8 German and 1/8 Indian to be considered a Native American!

I am nearly pure Swedish, but have 1/8 Irish. As if I would declare myself an Irishman now! Hardly!

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 22:51 | 3134953 rayduh4life
rayduh4life's picture

Use to check native american as I was born here.  Now they ask which tribe so I check other and write in Californian.

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 02:26 | 3135429 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Hmm, I've heard of the Moteesuhs, the hodedoes, the cmonbacks, and the Fukarwees... :>D

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 04:06 | 3135518 zhandax
zhandax's picture

You need (or needed) to be 1/16th Native American to get a license to open a casino, and in the 90's you needed documentation.  My grandmother had always told me her grandmother was full-blooded Cherokee, and the photo she had certainly seemed to support the claim.  I decided to apply for a license, and, since Mom was interested in genealogy at the time, I asked her to get me documentation.  She tracked down the family of her great-grandmother, and arranged a meeting two counties over.  I didn't qualify for a license, but got the most twisted lesson in history imaginable.  The ancestor in question wasn't Cherokee in the least, but also wasn't exactly a beauty queen.  She was 22 years old at the end of the civil war, in the south, where there were very few single men.  By 1867, she gave up and married my widowed great-great grandfather, who was 67 at the time.  They had three children.  Before this meeting, I never could understand how my great-great grandfather's tombstone listed a DOB of 1800.  Wonder if the documentation requirement for a casino license still applies?  I can still lie like a bond trader.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 22:58 | 3134962 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

Do you get IKEA discounts? 

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