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It's A Brain? It's A Kidney? It's KFC's Next PR Nightmare

Tyler Durden's picture




 

As if Yum Brands were not suffering enough this morning - as they forecast China comp sales to drop 6% (more than the forecast 4% decline), it seems the UK has their next PR disaster waiting to happen, courtesy of their KFC brand. After a 19-year-old Brit found a "horrible wrinkled foreign body" in his fried chicken meal, KFC has apologized (rather magnanimously) saying "while there was no health risk, we agree it was unsightly." Judge for yourself just how puke-worthy and generally emotionally scarred you would have been after biting into this 'brain-looking' image. KFC clarifies: "Although we haven't received the product, it appears from a photograph that unfortunately on this occasion a kidney, and not a brain as claimed, was not removed in the preparation process." Oh, just a kidney? Pass the salt then.

 

 

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Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:09 | 3132812 Peter K
Peter K's picture

Sheep brains. It's a UK delicacy :)

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:09 | 3132813 Whiner
Whiner's picture

The Colonel's secret recipe make all food-like substances deliciously edible, like...uh.. The .Bernank's sterilization sauce.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:10 | 3132814 Colonel
Colonel's picture

Oh man there goes breakfast. Thanks Tyler.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:11 | 3132817 JSD
JSD's picture

Kidneys For Children

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:12 | 3132820 QQQBall
QQQBall's picture

hmmm. tastes like chicken

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:12 | 3132822 Bryan
Bryan's picture

What!?  You mean our meat actually comes from animals?  Horrible.

 

geez, get over it and move on.  Next they'll be suing for hot coffee being too hot.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:13 | 3132827 Colonel
Colonel's picture

Zombie food.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:57 | 3132996 Mi Naem
Mi Naem's picture

Now if anyone should be an authority on this matter, it's "the Colonel". 

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:15 | 3132834 EnglishAustrian
EnglishAustrian's picture

Unlucky Fried Kitten

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:15 | 3132835 EnglishAustrian
EnglishAustrian's picture

Unlucky Fried Kitten

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:17 | 3132841 Salon
Salon's picture

How can an employee be so unmotivated and have such a bad attitude as to put that out to a customer.

I would have fired everyone involved. From the cook to the counter girl.

I have fired people for much less

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:41 | 3132938 Chump
Chump's picture

The counter girl is supposed to peel the skin off of every single piece of meat they sell to make sure it looks edible?  You sound like a shitty boss.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 12:55 | 3133144 Salon
Salon's picture

Lol.

Thats not obvious to you that something is wrong?

You're fired

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 13:11 | 3133208 Chump
Chump's picture

Did you not notice that the skin is peeled off or are you just very busy firing people while posting comments on the internet?

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:17 | 3132846 DOT
DOT's picture

Tastes like Human.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:22 | 3132864 ShrNfr
ShrNfr's picture

Steak and Kidney pie. The Brits eat that, but then again, the Brits eat anything.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:37 | 3132890 LouisDega
LouisDega's picture

"Its not meat. Its not cake.. I know, It's meat cake"

George Carlin, Carlin at Carnegie

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:34 | 3132901 SokPOTUS
SokPOTUS's picture

It's just real life hedonic regression in action.  Precisely equivalent to .gov presuming a trading down from Steak to Hamburger.  What's the problem here?

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:34 | 3132902 Bohm Squad
Bohm Squad's picture

"Eat recycled food...for a happier, healthier life."

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0TxJBUCakhY

 

 

 

 

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:35 | 3132907 rsnoble
rsnoble's picture

Would've been funny to see one of their main demographic customers eat this and relish it while being stoned at 1am.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:37 | 3132910 gratefultraveller
gratefultraveller's picture

What I can't wrap my head around is how a purported chicken kidney can be 3 inches long...

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:41 | 3132933 s2man
s2man's picture

We have 11 cockrells in the freezer, which we butchered ourselves.  One neighbor won't eat any because she knows where they came from, saw them when they were cute little chicks.  She pretends the plastic-wrapped meat from the store is "fake meat", the only way she can eat it.

Wait 'til I butcher the cute little bunnies, she'll probably puke. :-D

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:44 | 3132947 Groucho
Groucho's picture

you eat that shit you get what you deserve.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:45 | 3132955 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

MAN UP AND EAT IT! 

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 13:39 | 3133329 zerohedgeJUNKIE
zerohedgeJUNKIE's picture

The deal was chicken not a brainlike, maggot fest, kidney lookin frankenfood.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:45 | 3132959 zebrasquid
zebrasquid's picture

I got a thumb from a latex glove in my last KFC meal (25 years ago).

When I complained, they apologized and offered me more chicken to make up for it.

 

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 22:18 | 3134871 hooligan2009
hooligan2009's picture

did you? :)

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:46 | 3132960 catacl1sm
catacl1sm's picture

Awful offal.

 

^Very nice!

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:48 | 3132967 jmeyer
jmeyer's picture

I think it's all been said. Thanks guys for great laughs.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:51 | 3132977 Team Lemming
Team Lemming's picture

It's either a genetically modified turnip that escaped from its pen at the local Monsanto lab or KFC are beta testing a tapeworm substitute for its new "I can't believe it's not chicken!" range.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 12:15 | 3133033 edifice
edifice's picture

Where is Fabio?

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:52 | 3132979 jmeyer
jmeyer's picture

So that what a " Gangnam " is !

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:53 | 3132980 Mi Naem
Mi Naem's picture

What's the big deal here?  Brits eat kidney all the time.  They think it's food. 

Yum.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:59 | 3133002 Inthemix96
Inthemix96's picture

Try a real, home made steak-and-kidney pie friend.  With thick beef stock gravy.

With colmans english mustard on the pie crust.  Heaven itself.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 12:04 | 3133006 Mi Naem
Mi Naem's picture

Actually, I think that USED to be kidney until the maggots started to swarm it. 

'tsO.K. though, they're fried. 

 

Meanwhile, I'm just gonna take another bite outta this nice lady here. 

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 12:02 | 3133007 secret_sam
secret_sam's picture

I thought the Brits all eat kidney pies alla time...

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 12:13 | 3133027 jbvtme
jbvtme's picture

who looks at that food when they eat it?

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 12:14 | 3133030 haskelslocal
haskelslocal's picture

No worries for KFC. Taco Bell still serves particle board tacos.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 12:15 | 3133032 Frank N. Beans
Frank N. Beans's picture

put it on ebay

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 12:16 | 3133036 americanspirit
americanspirit's picture

We were wondering where that transplant shipment wound up

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 12:17 | 3133037 Miss Expectations
Miss Expectations's picture

Does Bill Ackman have a camera and a short position on KFC?

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 14:00 | 3133426 MyBrothersKeeper
MyBrothersKeeper's picture

Good one!  I guess since his long positions in P&G aren't doing much for the share price, I guess he has to make it up somewhere.  BTW, did anyone see the piece on Glen Beck's site about what they found to be, intentionally I might add, in the McRib sandwhich?  It has "real pork" like the commercial states but it's mostly stomach parts, lips etc that with a chemical...compacts together to look like rib meat. MMMMMMM, sounds tasty...just make sure it's smothered in barbecue sauce.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 12:25 | 3133058 yogibear
yogibear's picture

YUM BS alert. Their trying to do damage control. Deny it's anything other than chicken.

In an attempt to boost profits their sourcing from garbage meat processors.

Remember profits trump everything else!! 

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 12:26 | 3133063 Falconsixone
Falconsixone's picture

Is genetically modified giant chicken kidney better for you than the formaldehyde it's cooked in or do two wrongs make it alright?

Formaldehyde is good!

Formaldehyde for life!

It's Liver Kickin' Good!

Come in to KFC today and check out the new Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Formaldehyde sick chicken menu!

Today!

Today!

Today!

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 12:28 | 3133068 Shizzmoney
Shizzmoney's picture

You know America is declining when we can't even get Fried Chicken right.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 12:54 | 3133139 yogibear
yogibear's picture

YUM BS alert. Their trying to do damage control. Deny it's anything other than chicken.

In an attempt to boost profits their sourcing from garbage meat processors.

Remember profits trump everything else!! 

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 13:03 | 3133171 NEOSERF
NEOSERF's picture

 "Secret Recipe" special ingredient...just hope the donor is still in their ice bath.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 13:34 | 3133300 zerohedgeJUNKIE
zerohedgeJUNKIE's picture

Definitely fear is not a factor for you.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 13:52 | 3133393 PGR88
PGR88's picture

You people are whining like children

"...Please serve my fat ass all the fried meat I want, but make sure that every peace served all over the world doesn't ever appear to have come from an actual animal!!!!"

 

 

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 14:13 | 3133468 WTFisThat
WTFisThat's picture

Looking from a three letter agency point of view, its definitly a swamp gas.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 15:06 | 3133618 exartizo
exartizo's picture

TOP SECRET

KFC (YUM Brands) Internal Focus Group Study on Least Worst Customer Visualizations

Question: "If you were to encounter a Foreign Body in YOUR KFC Meal what would you MOST LIKE TO NOT think it is?"

1. a rat

2. a heart

3. a kidney

4. fecal material

5. an eyeball

6. a brain

7. your mother-in-law

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 16:21 | 3133925 hooligan2009
hooligan2009's picture

i think kfc must be getting close to a michelin star ..things have improved so much in the last few months from this:

http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=kfc+rats&oq=kfc+rats&gs_l=yo...

of course the brits have always been a little less fussy but now they seem to want stars too

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/northern_ireland/4290048.stm

http://www.caterersearch.com/Articles/29/10/2009/330646/Leicester-Square...

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 16:34 | 3133964 walcott
walcott's picture

KFC toy for the kids. A fried zuni doll nugget.

Barfff boycott...

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 16:46 | 3134027 H H Henry P P P...
H H Henry P P P Paulson's picture

It looks like an accidental deepfry of a side of mac&cheese, if KFC even sells that as a side.  What it's encased in who knows.

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 16:58 | 3134066 TSA gropee
TSA gropee's picture

There's obviously more than one purpose for breading fast food... Kinda redefines the old KFC slogan, "Finger lickin' good."

 

Tue, 01/08/2013 - 17:07 | 3134101 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

somebody found the brain of ophone.

he no longer needed it, anyway.

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 00:21 | 3135134 Hook Line and S...
Hook Line and Sphincter's picture

KFC is missing out on a great new revenue stream. Ipecac could be off the shelves in months, replaced by the Colon-ol.

Literally, everytime I have eaten at this reprehensible establishment my stomach did the limbo within 20 minutes. Haven't put that filth in my stomach in over 8 years now.

The chickens are half normal size at maturity, stunted, and likely angry at the world.

Hook Line and Sphincter

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 01:12 | 3135299 resurger
resurger's picture

Fucking What!>

Wed, 01/09/2013 - 03:20 | 3135511 yang46
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Wed, 01/09/2013 - 03:21 | 3135516 dadoody
dadoody's picture

I would have kept on eating....

 

In fact, I actually pay a premium for Chicken gizzard, chicken heart, and all sorts of chicken parts roast on a stick. "Yaki Tori" the Japanese call it. I eat them with sake and beer @ Honda-Ya out in Orange County. 

 

Thats good eating there that you people are missing out on.

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