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    05/23/2016 - 18:16
    This past Thursday marked the one-year anniversary of the US stock market’s death when stocks saw their last high. Market bulls have spent a year looking like the walking dead. They’ve...

Martian Central Bank Interested in Buying 100 $1 Trillion Coins

Tyler Durden's picture


Submitted by Charles Hugh-Smith of OfTwoMinds blog,

The $1 trillion coin saga takes an unexpected twist....

The $1 trillion platinum coin saga took a surprising turn as the Central Bank of Mars has expressed interest in buying 100 of the proposed coins. Interpreters are puzzling over the meaning and subtexts of the Martian communique; since Martian is described as an often-ambiguous combination of Fortran and Hungarian, this is no easy task.

Opinion on the Martian offer is divided. Some suspect the Martian Central Bank intends to buy the $100 trillion in platinum coins with electronically created quatloos, i.e. worthless currency.

These observers believe the Martians intend to claim the $100 trillion in platinum coins constitutes a claim on the entire U.S.A., the purchase of which would effectively give the Martian Central Bank a massive beachhead on Earth.

Others believe the Martian Central Bank is simply playing an interplanetary practical joke, showing that any central bank that issues its own currency can magically create phantom money and assets. What better way to illustrate this than to buy $100 trillion in phantom assets with equally phantom quatloos?

A smaller cadre of analysts suspect the Martian Central Bank naively believes the fantasy that the arbitrary creation of assets, either via platinum coins or electronic entries in the Federal Reserve's balance sheet, creates actual value. Though this credulity borders on the fantastic, these analysts point to the many commentators in the U.S. who have bought into the platinum coin fantasy.

If Paul Krugman et al. have swallowed the fantasy that something of real value can be created from nothing, then why not the Martian Central Bank?

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Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:06 | 3141779 The Alarmist
The Alarmist's picture

Sorry, but Dr. Evil has dibs on the first run.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:10 | 3141800 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

This is beyond counterfeiting.  It is madness, which is why the shitheads in DC love it.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:20 | 3141842 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

The notion is floated over the news wires to judge public response.  As stupid as the concept is, TPTB are constantly sending out trial balloons to gauge public opinion.  The goal is to avoid civil unrest when the new system is unveiled, the shape of which needs to be preplanned.


Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:22 | 3141852 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

Was'nt it only a couple of months ago that Krugman was talking about an alien invasion?


May be he knows something.


Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:25 | 3141879 Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

No, it is just another Nigerian scam.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 18:22 | 3142449 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

We're gonna need a bigger Mars...

Fri, 01/11/2013 - 01:27 | 3143472 Bohm Squad
Bohm Squad's picture

I heard we had to send the coins Western Union as soon as we deposited their check for $200 Trillion.  On the bright side, we get to keep the extra for our troubles!

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 17:54 | 3142336 tallen
tallen's picture

Makes more sense than our current financial system anyway. Go ahead Martians.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 20:02 | 3142735 aminorex
aminorex's picture

Amongst the least respectable means of smearing your opponent when you can't win a rational debate is the invocation of the "giggle factor".  They used it on  Ron Paul, and now they use it on the monetization via platinum plan.  Fact is, the dollar is backed by petroleum and air craft carriers.  Fact is, debts have to be paid.  Creditors would prefer the debts to be paid in hard currency, but there just isn't enough.  Debtors win this round, unless creditors decide to blow up the theatre with their children in it, out of sheer malice.


Thu, 01/10/2013 - 22:14 | 3143162 kchrisc
kchrisc's picture

Best synopsis on the dollar's backing that I've ever seen.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 20:51 | 3142904 Carp Flounderson
Carp Flounderson's picture

Yes yes, maybe he knows like the rest of you hedgies that value can only be created by digging shiny rocks out of the ground.  ;)  buahahaha, gold standard... suckers.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:24 | 3141869 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

Re: balloons...


<Marvin on the DEBT BUBBLE>  "Where's the kaboom? There was supposed to be an economy shattering kaboom!?"

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:28 | 3141895 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture

Actually, this would apply to the majority of the posters here waiting for the dollar to implode...

It will, but not today...

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:40 | 3141961 SilverIsKing
SilverIsKing's picture


Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:51 | 3142015 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture

~ 7-10 years or the House of Saud getting deposed.... Whichever comes first...  YMMV

As the JPY, GBP and EUR go through their death throes liquid assets in USD will be seen as safe havens... The Chinese will peg the Yuan as long as they can and will not drop the band as long the coupon from USD assets they have pays for ~25% of their oil imports...  

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:29 | 3141886 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

Yes, to judge public stupidity.  Let's say I value my underwear at $200,000.  I then put a gun to a bankster's head and say he must accept said drawers in satisfaction of my mortgage.  The fraud is in matching an insanely overpriced asset with a real liability.  The counterfeiting and money printing are in the same transaction.

Collect underpants >  Defraud the Public = Profit ;)

May Rufus and fellow travelers get what they deserve.


Thu, 01/10/2013 - 17:41 | 3142276 Encroaching Darkness
Encroaching Darkness's picture

You and the SouthPark underwear gnomes have a real scam going!

Discharging a real liability by creating a fake asset, then pricing that asset to discharge the liability, is a FRAUD. If I did it, it would be a fraud (per your illustration). If You did it, it would still be a fraud.

If the government does it ... well, Marvin the Martian will be the least of our troubles!

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 19:26 | 3142649 corvettekenny
corvettekenny's picture

If the Margaritaville machine was worth $92 billion, then surely a pair of underpants is worth $200k!

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 18:19 | 3142434 midtowng
midtowng's picture

The actual name is Central Bank of Barsoom.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:11 | 3141804 magpie
magpie's picture

Dr. Evil sure knew how to teach people about inflation

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:45 | 3141979 CPL
CPL's picture

I understand the Pixies of pixie villiage have upped the bid from one trillion bazillion dollar unicorns.


Rock solid...can't lose.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 17:46 | 3142299 toady
toady's picture

screw the martiins, the Japanese will trade you a quadrillion yen coin for 100 trillion dollar coins.

Fri, 01/11/2013 - 02:22 | 3143513 TPTB_r_TBTF
TPTB_r_TBTF's picture

Be nice to the Martians! 

When they take delivery, treat them nicely!


from an FBI X-file:


A very serious situation may develop at any time with regard to the “flying saucers”. If one of these should be attacked, the attacking plane will almost certainly be destroyed. In the public mind, this might create near panic and international suspicion. The principal data concerning these craft is now at hand and must be offered, no matter how fantastic and unintelligible it may seem to minds not previously instructed in thinking of this type.




We give information and warning and can do no more. Let the newcomers be treated with every kindness. Unless the disks are withd-(illegible) a (illegible, illegible) with which our culture and science are incapable of dealing. A heavy responsibility rests upon the few in authority who are able to understand this matter.


DonT "screw the martians", or you risk upsetting the sheeple!

Misconceptions about the Galactic Federation need to be avoided!

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 19:00 | 3142588 Tursas
Tursas's picture

Martian dictionary defines "inflation" as "envy"...

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:13 | 3141820 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

a friend was telling this story:

he had a long, long night flight with a lady next to him that was absolutely convinced that her country was going to solve all problems "because in the Treasury they have found one trillion platinum coins"

oh, and "I have no idea why didn't they look in the Treasury before - you know, there is a reason for the name"

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 18:23 | 3142450 grid-b-gone
grid-b-gone's picture

Sadly, this will probably be the typical level of understanding of the average reset survivor. Those who understand and take steps to zag when official action zigs risk getting crushed. 

If you never stack, or prep, or resist, you will simply trade your old currency in for the new currency worth X % less, adjust the balances in your accounts held in electronic form, redo your budget for the paycheck hit, and go on with life.

Your shows will still come on at their same times, race cars will still run counter-clockwise, and your favorite beverages will still be brewed.

As Mr. White says, maybe stupid can't be fixed, but it is also so very simple. Why not go with it? /sarc off  

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:26 | 3141881 Snakeeyes
Snakeeyes's picture

Dr Evil: 1 trillion dollars!

Only Martians would be dumb enough to listen to Krugman.


Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:07 | 3141783 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

yesterday i heard Rick Santelli say "Ben Bernanke is a great American" and just now he emphatically said treasuries ard not in a bubble. WTF.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:20 | 3141845 bigdumbnugly
bigdumbnugly's picture

maybe someone palmed him a nice trillion dollar platinum coin, fonz.

everybody has their price.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:54 | 3142032 fuu
fuu's picture

Also he is on TV and wants to take our guns.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:07 | 3141784 Badabing
Badabing's picture

welcome you thing from another world you

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:09 | 3141799 Big Corked Boots
Big Corked Boots's picture

Thank you for making me use a few brain cells that I thought had died of old age!

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:07 | 3141789 AccreditedEYE
AccreditedEYE's picture

At this point, just mint the f-ing coin so we can get done with this crap... pretending like money has any value anymore.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:29 | 3141902 Buzz Hacksaw
Buzz Hacksaw's picture

The way I see it is they minted that coin around 2008. It's sitting under wraps up Bernak's ass_ets.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 17:49 | 3142314 Poor Grogman
Poor Grogman's picture

I will get the jeweler down the road to knock one up next week if I get a spare minute or two.

I reckon it will cost about two hundred for something passable.

It won't be overly large, but please realize that keeping costs down IS important.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:12 | 3141805 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Sorry, but the Venusians have first dibs on any Treasury/Mint overruns.

<"However a large deposit can hold you place in line" - Krugman>


Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:48 | 3141986 CPL
CPL's picture

Not if the Sasquatch counter parties omit their standing on the commodities managing the affair.


If that doesn't happen the Smurfs and the Snorks will walk.


WALK I TELL YOU!  THen all HELL Breaks lose with no smurf bidders.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 17:19 | 3142178 knukles
knukles's picture

All this is making my testes painfully shrivel up inside my torso

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:11 | 3141808 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

No you dumbasses, Mars has no Platinum and they need about 100 coins worth of the stuff to energize their Earthblaster 2000 laser cannon.

Next, Krugman gets that invasion he's always going on about.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:20 | 3141836 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture

Actually its the Illudium Q-36 explosive space modulator

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:54 | 3142027 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

They can do it with Platinum instead of Illudium except it overheats a bit.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 18:25 | 3142463 francis_sawyer
Thu, 01/10/2013 - 17:17 | 3142162 eaglerock
eaglerock's picture

Danger Will Robinson!

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:11 | 3141809 JustPrintMoreDuh
JustPrintMoreDuh's picture

Holy Shit!  There's life on Mars!?

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:19 | 3141844 LouisDega
Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:36 | 3141940 magpie
magpie's picture

It is life...just not intelligent life.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 17:37 | 3142258 SpanishGoop
SpanishGoop's picture

A planet inhabited soly by banksters ?


Thu, 01/10/2013 - 22:54 | 3143256 NoClueSneaker
NoClueSneaker's picture

... definately .... Black Holes are just the cloaks for a Intergalactical Imperium Of TBTF Banksters .... ( we don't see a shit, and they're feeding on galaxies ).

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 22:00 | 3143130 WmMcK
WmMcK's picture

That boy's as sharp as a bowling ball.

Thu, 01/10/2013 - 16:12 | 3141811 Martin Silenus
Martin Silenus's picture

The Bernank is very angry...very angry indeed.

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