White House Petition To Publicly Assay And Validate The US Treasury's 8,100 Tons Of Gold

Tyler Durden's picture

In the past few weeks there has been a veritable explosion of White House petitions ranging from the bizarre to the surreal to the outright absurd, including such demands as Texas (and other southern states) seceding, deporting Piers Morgan, not deporting Piers Morgan, creating a Joe Biden sitcom, and even making a total mockery out of the US, and global, monetary system and evading the debt ceiling using a cheap, platinum coin-based parlor trick.

All of these are, for lack of a better word, a la carte distractions launched by bored American citizens, meant to evade the menial drudgery of everyday life, and, generally, reality. In short: entertainment. And, logically, virtually none have so far contained actual, actionable provisions, that stood to benefit all Americans, instead of just one half of the ideological or party split. At least not until a new petition appeared two days ago, one demanding that the administration do something that has never been done on the public record: perform an assayed public audit of all the 8,100 tons of gold owned by the US Treasury. And not just any audit, but one including "professional auditors outside of the Mint, Treasury, GAO, Inspector General and Federal Reserve system."

That is one petition, which unlike all the other gimmicky wastes of time, that we (and certainly the German people if not the Bundesbank) would wholeheartedly endorse, and one which we hope promptly crosses the 25,000 signature threshold needed for a formal response from the White House.

Sadly, the response will be one denying what the people demand, but it will be interesting to see just what excuse the White House uses to shoot down an idea that is far more worthy of people's time and attention than "minting" coins whose only real symbolism is that America is flat broke.

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tickhound's picture

Piers Morgan will get to the bottom of this bullshit.

SafelyGraze's picture

piers is busy with the bottom-getting-to of chemtrails right now

and alternative currencies

boogerbently's picture

If he can get an audit, I'll vote for him to stay.

Why do we need 25,000 signatures to get something done that should happen EVERY year ?

DoChenRollingBearing's picture

I volunteer to be part of the team that would do the audit.  Specialists (chemists, auditors, gold experts, statisticians) are of course needed primarily, but generalists are needed as well, if only to be able to communicate with, uh, the US People the results of the Gold Audit.

tekhneek's picture

8,050 tonnes of tungsten took awhile to procure, either way you look at it. I for one am proud of them.

francis_sawyer's picture

Geraldo... [We need our TOP man on this]...

krispkritter's picture

Piers...screw that Slimey, er, Limey piece of shit.


Fire him off a deck gun back to the UK. Maybe being prosecuted for being the hypocritical piece of animal dung he is(phone hacking anyone?) will give him pause to consider how screwed up governments run amock can be...

Caged Monkey's picture

Act now! Signatories get their faces printed on baseball cards!

To be reviewed in "Terror Tuesday" meetings by the NSA and Obama.

Thomas's picture

Not as funny as the Trillion Dollar Twinkie Petition.

flacon's picture

Have you guys seen this guy on youtube? He's selling all his silver right now:



Exiting my precious metals investment!



I wish I had more paper money to buy his silver off him..... LOL!


Zap Powerz's picture

This Audit will never happen.  This is just mental masturbation.

Look. Your government hates you and wants you dead.  Can it be said any more plainly?

Your government does not give one single solitary shit what you want.

They do, however, care about what you think and what  you do. So go sign the petition and let them know what you think!

GetZeeGold's picture



He's selling all his silver right now:


Anyone else want to sell their PMs to me.....for debouched paper. Welcome to the mind screw bitch.

The Alarmist's picture

Never gonna happen with a leadership that has eagerly embraced the Nathan Jessup "You Proles Can't Handle the Truth" school of "responsible government."

jimmytorpedo's picture

I thought Uncle Fester would blow his gold up instead of selling it.

Xinu's picture

I agree, our government hates us. Exceprt there is one thing it loves about us: our tax dollars! In their minds, that's why we exist.

BLOTTO's picture

IMO, its worse then that.


Money they can print all 'they' want.


Its our energy that they desire...


Our soul...thats the rub!


Everything else is trivial...

RockyRacoon's picture

He might as well exit his precious metals holdings.  He exited the world of the sane long ago.

old naughty's picture

So, this is a second walk-thru (or sail thru) by Her Majesty...

BattlegroundEurope2011's picture

He does say many valid points though.  Except he doesn't go into the fact  Indians and East Asians loading up on PMs.

Janice's picture

He also doesn't go into the concept that previous metal is a transfer of wealth. Which reminds me of my boating accident while ferrying my precious metals.

For example, if you are on the island of fiat money and want to cross the ocean to the land of NEW fiat money, you'd better have a boat. Precious metals is that boat. Does he believe that the transfer to a new world currency will be smooth and will not cause anyone a loss of wealth (with the exception of bankers and politicians)?

I take comfort in knowing that my boat has been repaired, and should I ever acquire more precious metal to replace what was lost in the boating accident, I will have a vessel to the safe land of new fiat money.

AGAU's picture

So be careful when carrying your boat on a boat.

HomeBrewPrepper's picture

That guy is an idiot and doesn't realize pm are an inflation hedge and just damn fun to play with and hold. Well at least the little I have left after the boating accident.

Xinu's picture

Another 'low information', big-mouthed, moron.

So, one of the reasons he's selling gold because "Gold Rush" is on TV, which means there so much gold being produced that it'll never grow in value?  I've seen that show, the amount they dig up is hardly going to rock the precious metals world! He doesn't have a clue.

trav777's picture

he makes one or two points;  gold production is listed as having made a new peak in 2011.  Production has been up for 3 years running.

This would more than explain the ceiling on prices.

MeelionDollerBogus's picture

Ya, this is like the 3rd time Rawdog's sold "all his silver". Either he isn't, or he's very bad at timing because you can believe the other 2 times were also not good choices.

NoDebt's picture

I'm laughing so hard I'm wiping away tears.

You think the WH has those petitions up because they value your input?  They're tracking your IP so they know who the troublemakers are. Go ahead- create that account at Whitehouse.gov.  You gotta be kidding me.

Remember the first time you realized all that spam in your inbox was because they were scanning your emails and selling the results to "internet marketers"?  Same thing with this petition bullshit.  Show up on too many of those petitions and your house will be targeted for a drone strike someday.  Or sent enough spam from MoveOn.org to make you WISH you were targeted for a drone strike.

Mike in GA's picture



To stand and be counted is noble

Despite groupthink of modern-day Goebbels

So to hell with those drones

'Cause I feel in my bones

2 A is about to go mobile!
JLee2027's picture

Being afraid isn't going to stop the clowns in Washington. Only bold action will. Stand up and be counted nodebt.

The Alarmist's picture

I remember being told in the R part of SERE that open defiance was probably not the best strategy for returning alive and with honor.

auric1234's picture

Stand up and be counted 1-2-3
For what you are about to receive
We are the dealers
We'll give you everything you need
Hail hail to the good times
'Cause rock has got the right of way
We ain't no legend, ain't no cause
We're just livin' for today

For those about to rock, we salute you
For those about to rock, we salute you

We rock at dawn on the front line
Like a bolt right out of the blue
The sky's alight with the guitar bite
Heads will roll and rock tonight

For those about to rock, we salute you
For those about to rock, we salute you
For those about to rock, we salute you
Yes we do
For those about to rock, we salute you

Oooh, we salute!
Oooh, ooooh yeah

unrulian's picture

Fuck the drones....use your android to land 'em in your backyard like the kids in Iran did

Miffed Microbiologist's picture

I'm hoping many people sign up. Kind of a Darwinian moment. As long as Sauron's eye is focused elsewhere all is okay. Wait, I'm here... shit, I'm on the top of the list!


Miffed Microbiologist's picture

I see you have adopted a new strategy. Bugging me to get off ZH during dinner. No ZH after 9pm. Sending the dogs to find me when I'm in the barn hiding out to read ZH. Now this. I'm going to be banned just so all the other significant others of ZH members don't get the idea and do likewise. Think you've got me in checkmate smarty pants......hell hath no fury than a women.....


Hulk's picture

Too Funny!

Mr Miffed, it looks like a spiked neck collar and good strong chain are whats needed here!!!

Mr.Miffed's picture

I reserve using those to when Mrs. Miffed is especially naughty like the time she got into my good 7.62x51 stockpile. She is in a much better mood this morning because we are going out to get her hens several bags of special feed. Hopefully that will make for a nice afternoon for me :-)

Jena's picture

Oh HELL no!  ZH is mine, MINE, I tell you!  Mr. Jena had better not get any ideas like Mr. Miffed there did...

Miffed Microbiologist's picture

Jena, I've been very foolish. When we were first married, I had him well shackled on a short leash. Over the years he's slowly coerced me to loosen it bit by bit. Then, when the lead was sufficient, he made a wild dash and snapped it. He's been doing Pepe La Pue dances all around me and won't let me get close enough to put it on again. SAVE YOURSELF before it it's too late!


Jena's picture

It's too late for me too Miffed.  I'm 20 years in but I can't say I ever had this one on any leash.  The best I can do is keep that positive reinforcement thing going...

Hey wait!  He's been using that back on me, too!  Dammit, he has a black heart!

Good luck!

Miffed Microbiologist's picture

Ha ha! Men, you can't live with them and you can't live without them! Though they do say the same about us I have to admit. This May is our 30th anniversary and he's taking me to New Zealand because I've always wanted to go. So I put up with some fractiousness. Hey, there's got to be some give and take and positive reinforcement to smooth over the rough edges! Take care and hope you enjoy the wild ride.


NoDebt's picture

Yeah, I thought of that about 30 seconds after I posted originally!

In other news, the advertising algos on ZH have almost given up on me buying T-shirts from busty blondes (which would have worked if they had kept at it long enough).  They have now determined that I want to meet "hot single guys online".  Who knows?  Maybe they know more about me than I know about myself.

Miffed Microbiologist's picture

Well, ya got me beat. I'm getting " meet Hot Asian women who are dying to meet you" sites. I've got some crazy cookies or some one has borrowed my iPad. Mr miffed... Shall I add more ammo to my arsenal??


Hulk's picture

Mr Miffed needs to learn how to cover his ipad tracks...

Raymond Reason's picture

Cancel your account on ZH then.  We've got to stop fearing these little napoleons. 

Vagabond's picture

Man up.  Or do you plan to spend the rest of your life hiding in a corner?

decon's picture

Do you think reading and commenting at ZH is any different?

XenoFrog's picture

This is spot on. If we've learned anything in the past four years it's that Obama doesn't handle criticism or challenges to his power well. He doesn't forgive, and he doesn't forget. Lefty garbage don't see anything wrong with targetting you and your family for personal attacks. Sign this and you are begging to be disappeared.

Vagabond's picture

There may be a time when silence becomes necessary, but this is not it.  They aren't going to kill an entire public list of people.  Get your fear under control.